goldenbeastkeeper

[goldenbeastkeeper]

❝ embrace the forces that surround you . bend gravity and space. you are a child of the stars , shout what has been unsung ❞

looped by fuchs ( guidelines . about )

[goldenbeastkeeper]

Send 👋 to play with my muse's hair

Bonus points for more context, such as:

pat

braid

comb/brush

twirl a strand

put a flower crown on

comb fingers though it

kiss the top of the head

anything else you want, have fun

[goldenbeastkeeper]

[goldenbeastkeeper]

"valor" loop kneels before the boy while wearing their human disguise ( how odd to think of this appearance as a disguise when it has been their original one . but if they thought about that they might have to confront their emotions about that and stars, they were not ready ! ) .

"do you know that today is a special day? it's been about a year that I found you"

they rummage through their cloak, pulling out a knitted fire bee plush they had secretly been working on. "thank you for stumbling into my life"

"It is?" Oh! It is! Huh!

He gasped as the plush was presented to him and reached out to grab it, immediately hugging it to his chest with a giggle.

"Thank you!"

[goldenbeastkeeper]

"Oh." Huh. Interesting.

"Maybe," he said softly. He doubted it would, but . . . Titan, he hoped he got to see them again for it to even be a possibility in the first place.

". . . Goodnight, Collector. Sleep well." He took a breath.

And he covered the Collector's disc with the blanket.

His hand lingered on the smooth stone beneath it for one second, two, three.

Then he pulled away, slipping his mask back on and jumping out the window. He caught himself on his staff as he ignored the way his vision blurred with tears and dove back down to the manor proper.

❝ No, but... ❞ He turned, gazing in the direction of the window. ❝ some of my friends used to. And they'd get real upset about having to go to sleep, because that meant we couldn't play anymore that day. ❞ He closed his eyes, form moving to sit upon the disc like a chair. ❝ They were sad I didn't need to sleep, too, because for me it'd be way longer before we could play again. ❞

They faced Valor again, shrugging. ❝ I napped when they slept, even though I didn't hafta, so that way, it was like no time passed at all when we woke up. It's like we were never apart! ❞

He eyed the sheet that covered his tablet more often than not, huffing. Realistically, this was necessary, even if he didn't like it... the way Titan babies hated going to bed at the end of the day, but... maybe... with any luck...

❝ If we get to see each other again someday, even if its not for a super duper long time, maybe it'll feel like our time apart was also just a looong dream. ❞ Collector offered, not... one hundred percent believing it themself, but... he wanted it to be true. He wanted it more than anything.

❝ G-goodnighty night, Golden Guard, ❞ They pretended like they didn't just choke on their words, glancing again at the sheet cover, ❝ and don't let the bug demons bite. ❞

[goldenbeastkeeper]

"You have a bedtime?" Valor asked with a raised eyebrow, because focusing on that was better than focusing on the fact that they would probably never see each other again.

"Oh- Here." He picked the fabric up from where it had slipped onto the floor and stood.

This . . . this really was it, wasn't it?

He didn't want this to end.

The Collector glanced down at the floor once more, letting it sink in, really sink in - that this was the last time they might ever see one another... not only for a long time, but maybe for all time.

His eyes drooped. Why was this so hard? He had seen people for the last time before - the Titans, his siblings... he didn't know it was a goodbye at those times, and he also knew it wasn't gonna be forever until he saw them again, but... maybe the fact he was aware this time around was what made it seem so, so superly unfair.

Whatever. They couldn't do anything about it. Not right now, not like... this.

They sighed, slipping on a calm, unbothered facade. ❝ Yeah... I guess you're right, you should go, even if I reaaally don't want you to. 'Sokay, I'm up past my bedtime anyway. ❞ They clapped soundlessly. ❝ Where's my lil' disc blanket at? Collector needs a nap. ❞

[goldenbeastkeeper]

Valor returned his smile with one that was similarly bittersweet.

Titan, he didn't want to go.

But he had to. If he didn't get back before Lord Belos is, then he'd die now rather than . . . sometime later.

Titan, he didn't want to go.

But he did things he didn't want to do all the time.

He swallowed thickly.

". . . I should go . . ."

He didn't get up when he said it, even though he should have. Just a bit longer. Just a bit longer.

Dragging this out was probably only making it worse.

❝ Months. ❞ The Collector repeated, even though he swore it felt much, much longer than that. Still... that was months worth of friendship and companionship the likes of which he hadn't seen in eons. Yes, the Titanlings were his bestest little buddies ever, no doubt about it, but they were also mostly littl'uns. Valor was... well, he was closer to Collector's level, he liked to think. The fact that it was all going to go away soon...

They blinked at Valor for a moment, shocked to see him be the one to initiate a pinky swear. It was so rare for anyone to indulge them in their whimsical little quirks, so for their first friend in so long to do so on his own accord meant... a lot.

A closed-eye smile that didn't fully reach their eyes spread across their face, and while tight and stiff, there was real, genuine, bittersweet joy behind it, too. He looked back at his friend once more and held his pinky out in turn, and even if their finger couldn't physically wrap around Valor's own, they knew that didn't make it any less meaningful.

❝ Yeah, we... we'll both never forget. I pinky swear it. ❞

[goldenbeastkeeper]

. . . Huh.

He looked away when the Collector said he was never mean to Hope. They didn't . . . they didn't know. They didn't know that he was the one who-

"Months," he clarified in a quiet tone.

Despite . . . despite not knowing the specifics of what happened to Hope, it was still . . . wild to hear the Collector say all this. He . . . he really liked all this stuff about him? That much? Genuinely?

"I . . ." Valor's voice wavered. "I won't ever forget, either. Pinky swear?" Since the Collector said it first . . .

He lifted his hand from the floor so that he could make a pinky promise, touching the tip of his pinky back against the Collector.

He made no attempt to pull his hand back, but a resolute expression crossed his face, trying to put to words what he was thinking.

❝ Yeah! You've been on all these cool adventures as Golden Guard, and you come back and tell me about 'em, you don't keep it all to yourself. You're nice, and you never yell at me or tell me to be quiet, and you were never mean to... to baby beast either, ❞ Their face momentarily fell, ❝ and I've had a lot of fun these past few... uh, months? Years? ❞ They asked, he was pretty sure it wasn't too long based off what Hope looked like the few times he'd seen her, but they were never great with calculating mortal time, least of all after ages spent imprisoned.

❝ Whatever, I had a lot of fun learnin' new stuff about this planet, and hearing about your quests and stuff, and seeing out the window, and... and I'm gonna miss it... ❞ He trailed off, knowing that all he was doing was continuing to stave off the inevitable, ❝ and I wish there was more time, I wanted to play, but... I really won't ever, never, forget 'bout it all, even though I can't see you again. ❞

[goldenbeastkeeper]

Valor's eyes widened slightly as they put their hand over his. Huh. That . . .

Didn't feel bad.

He just . . . stared, at their shadowed hand. Was it because he couldn't actually feel it? Was that why it didn't feel bad? It . . . it felt nice, that they returned the gesture. Huh??? Why was this so different from when Lord Belos touched him?

Valor's gaze snapped from the Collector's hand to his face when he spoke. ". . . Huh?" That. What? That didn't make any sense. Why would he think that? "You . . . do?"

He was mostly just venting, ranting even, about how upset he was about it all, but hearing his friend echo his thoughts, assuring him that he knew exactly how they were feeling and didn't like it or want it either... it felt a little less terrible.

His tense posture relaxed only slightly, and the Collector averted his gaze and looked down mutely, sitting figuratively and literally with the grave reality of their shared situation.

As such, they found their eyes widening at the tender, completely unfamiliar gesture. It wasn't really like Valor, and it was so unlike anyone in their life they had known thus far. The kindness of it all...

He looked back up, full-moon pupils wobbling at Valor as they took one of their own shadowy hands and rested it atop his own to the best of his ability.

❝ Tha-thank you too, for bein' my friend! I-I think you're the nicest, coolest, smartest, funnest Golden Guard there ever was, and... and I pinky swear I won't ever, ever forget you. ❞

[goldenbeastkeeper]

Valor squeezed his eyes shut as the Collector laid out all of his own feelings that he never dared to say aloud. Never dared to admit. His own words were a hoarse whisper. "I know. I know I know I know I-"

He took a breath. "I don't want to, either." But what else was there? There was nothing. Even if he did run away, take the Collector and bolt, Lord Belos would find them. He was everywhere, he had scouts everywhere, there would be no chance of survival. So he had to keep surviving. Which meant he had to keep doing this and hope hope hope that he didn't mess up for long enough that things cooled down and he'd be allowed more leeway again.

Titan. He was dead, wasn't he?

Opening his eyes when the Collector spoke again, Valor looked down and . . . hesitated. There was a thing people did to comfort others, right? He never really understood it, because it always made him feel worse when Lord Belos did it with him, but he'd seen it a few times with witches and demons where it seemed to actually help. Maybe it would with the Collector, too . . . ?

Slowly, cautiously, he held his hand out over their shadowed form. He pulled back just slightly, still uncertain, before committing and placing it lightly down on the wood in front of him, ready to pull back the moment it seemed uncomfortable for the shadow in front of him.

". . . Thank you. For everything. I . . . I didn't know it was possible to be this comfortable around someone."

Though his shoulders unhunched slightly when Valor agreed, he scrunched his face up at the reality the two of them were in.

❝ I... I don't wanna keep doing what we're doing, I wanna... ❞ he balled up his fists, a frustrated noise escaping him, ❝ ggrraaahhghh, I wanna get out, I wanna be free, I want you to be free, and we could go explore the whole Isles and I could see everything I missed and you could tell me all about the beasties there, and- ❞

❝ -we can't, we have to stay stuck... and I don't wanna. ❞ Their last few words faded into a whisper, their most recent burst of injustice and anger fizzling out again. They didn't like this at all, they didn't want to stop talking - they knew if he flew out that window, there was a good chance they'd never see him again... for one reason or another. Worst of all, the Collector knew it wasn't very nice to keep him here with a risk of harm at Philip's hands, they knew that, and yet...

❝ ...I know you gotta go, but... ❞

[goldenbeastkeeper]

Valor's eyes lifted to look back at the Collector as he spoke. But then he dropped them again with a sigh. "It's not. There's not."

"We just . . . have to keep doing what we've always been doing, I guess."

Eyes dropping to the floor, the Collector mutely nodded once more. He didn't like the answer he got, but it wasn't the one he was expecting. It wasn't an outright 'no'. But... somehow, the uncertainty of it was almost worse.

Were they being fair by being upset at the idea of Valor not coming back, even if it would put him at risk? Probably not, then again, their siblings always pointed out how much of whiner they were. They opened their eyes again, fixating blankly on a point in the distance.

❝ It's not fair. ❞ They voiced, bitterness in their tone. ❝ Nothing about anything is fair, not one bit. ❞ They crossed their arms, finally looking back at Valor. ❝ And- and... there's really nothin' you or me can even do about it. ❞

[goldenbeastkeeper]

". . . I don't know," came Valor's answer, just as quiet as before. "I . . . I can try, but . . ." He'd have to be even more careful than he usually was.

He wanted to. Titan, he wanted to. He liked the Collector, liked being with them, liked being around them, liked talking with them. But he didn't know how much he could risk. He didn't know what would end up killing him.

For once, the silence was welcomed by the Collector as they sat there quietly, mulling over the bombshell they'd had dropped on them today. Their old friend was a liar who was hurting their real friend, badly, and had been lying about what he was doing to the Collector for Stars only knew how long... and this whole time, they had helped him do it.

The time spent thinking wasn't very productive, as he kept falling into thought spirals about the whole thing, but one positive is that it allowed him to will away that funny sensation that had been building in his eyes.

He finally lifted his head as Valor spoke, almost missing it at first with how quiet he was. He looked around nervously, almost not wanting to voice the nagging thought in his head, but...

They didn't want anyone to lie to them anymore.

❝ If you go... will you be able to come back ever again? ❞ They asked, quietly, hesitantly, almost desperately, really. There was an answer they didn't want to hear. They... they didn't want him to not come back, but... if it was dangerous, if Philip ever caught him... well, they both knew very well what would happen now, and... they needed to hear one more truth while they still could.

[goldenbeastkeeper]

Valor nodded with a grimace. ". . . Yeah."

He fell silent, for a long time. He didn't quite want to leave, not after all this, not after such a conversation, not when . . . not when this was the only place he had where he felt like he could actually be himself, where he could speak freely without worry.

Titan he didn't want to leave.

"I . . ." His voice fell into a whisper. ". . . I should go soon . . ."

Would soon be okay? Could he stay for just a little longer?

He closed his eyes, mutely nodding as Valor went on to explain just how Philip had planned to protect everyone against witches.

To make them go to sleep permanently, forever.

His brow furrowed as their friend went on to say how normal this was for him. It... it was normal for them, too, to hear about after the fact, that one of Philip's precious toys had gone off and gotten themselves hurt, that their pristine handcrafted visages were now marred by damage... that Philip had really caused himself.

❝ 'Sokay. ❞ They mumbled in reply, even though it didn't feel okay. A strange sensation began building, making it hard to see even in this shadowed form. Philip, who they thought was one of their bestest friends ever... had lied to them this whole time. He had been hurting and breaking the Grimwalkers all by himself the whole time, and telling them white lies about the reasons why. He had been hurting their real friend.

The Collector finally looked up from the floor and glanced up at Valor again, trying to blink the strange sensation away. His mouth began to wobble when Valor pointed out that he shouldn't be here, that it was dangerous to come here - probably always was, knowing how often and how easily Philip would break his special soldiers.

They brought their knees to their chest, resting their arms on their legs as they sighed. Valor was right - what could he do? Go into hiding? Philip would no doubt track him down, and... and... then...

❝ ...If he found out... he'd make you go away for good too. ❞

[goldenbeastkeeper]

"Protect us by killing them," Valor clarified. "By getting rid of them all forever."

Valor looked away. It . . . It didn't sound like a mistake, did it? He didn't like to think of Lord Belos that way, but . . . the proof was all there, wasn't it? He shrugged, though. "Normal to me."

"Sorry," he muttered at the way the Collector deflated. But it was better that they knew, right?

He blinked incredulously at the Collector's question. ". . . Do? There isn't anything I can do. Titan, I'm already on thin ice now because of-" He cut himself off before he could speak her name, and he looked away. "I'm just trying to survive. I probably shouldn't even be here right now. If Lord Belos found out . . ." He trailed off. The Collector could probably guess now, what might happen.

❝ Wh- 'course they're bad, but.. but the whole point is... is to protect us all from the witches, not... not- ❞ He stammered, unable to complete the thought. This didn't make sense. Philip was their friend. Friends... friends sometimes told little fibs, yeah, and they didn't like it, but... friends didn't lie to each other over and over again about real serious stuff like this! Making someone sleep forever and never come back 'cause you didn't like 'em was maybe the most serious thing of all time.

This was supposed to be a game, a game of getting rid of bad things, that did bad things to other - good! -people, and... and Collector was... Collector was helping him.

He was about to voice aloud that this was all just supposed to be play pretend when Valor said it wasn't just witches and demons that Philip hurt. He... he could attest to that, a little bit... sometimes, even if they were friends, the things Philip said to them when he was upset hurt. And he never listened when Collector told him that he was being mean, when they told him to stop it.

But then Valor did something- showed something, that had their eyes blown wide in shock... and more than just a little horror. That scar across his arm... Collector until now thought nothing of it, they heard that Philip's t-grimwalkers were clumsy, according to him - silly, feeble-minded things, he'd say, that always seemed to get themselves hurt.

But that wasn't actually the truth, was it?

No, it couldn't be, and as Valor lifted his shirt, they raised an eyebrow in utter confusion, which was quickly replaced with that same sense of horror and dread they'd just been experiencing. Those scars... were big. And scars that big didn't tend to happen to mortals unless they were really hurt, bad. That... wasn't his own doing.

Then, the brief thought that- well- maybe it was all an accident, that Belos just so happened to be around the grimwalkers when he'd lash out, that it was just a total coincidence that it happened every... single... time, maybe it wasn't on purpose, somehow... well... that fizzled out almost as soon as it came to their mind. He held his hands over his head, shaking it as Valor verbally laid out essentially the same train of thought he had gone through... that... it likely wasn't accidental, given everything.

❝ It doesn't sound like a mistake to me. ❞ He admitted his agreement, sparing a quick look at Valor's arm scar again as soon as he readjusted his clothes. ❝ And... and that's so awful. ❞ Collector managed to whisper out, eyes drooping. He wanted to yell, or... or... he didn't really know what, but he felt so much energy brimming inside of him with no way to escape.

They closed their eyes as Valor locked his pinky around their own, visibly deflating. They knew he knew the power of pinky swears... which meant none of what he said was a joke, it was all real. Philip had lied. He had lied to them - just like all their siblings, to get them to do what he wanted, to teach him all those complex spells, to do his chores and play his game the way he wanted, and... worst of all?

He had hurt the Collector's only other friend in doing so.

When they finally opened their eyes again, they crossed their arms and focused down on the floor beneath them, brow furrowing. ❝ So... what're you gonna do? What even can you do? ❞

[goldenbeastkeeper]

Valor looked over and her, then looked away. ". . . Thank you."

It was still difficult to believe she was doing this. He definitely needed to make sure he'd make up for it.

He nodded to acknowledge her going to rest, but said nothing else.

While Valor busied himself with the housework that Evelyn struggled to do, Evie busied herself with getting Valor a place to sleep. She didn't have an extra room but she did have a day bed that she had covered in sewing projects she threw herself into. It was near the fireplace and he'd be plenty warm. As she gathered her projects into her arms, she made sure to give him a wide berth. Now was probably not the time to keep talking.

But, once the day bed was made up, she smiled and said, "It's nothing fancy but at least you'll have a warm place to sleep that isn't on the cold, hard ground. Let me know if you need more blankets. But for now, I...I think I need to rest. I'm very tired."

[goldenbeastkeeper]

Things that don’t matter to me about another roleplayer:

If you use icons; some people just can’t, or don’t like it.

If you have to reply on the mobile app; I can trim our posts for us so we don’t piss people off.

If you need time to reply; Just let me know so I don’t think the thread is dropped. Everyone takes different amounts of time to do things. Never feel bad if your muse just isn’t working with you.

If you need to drop a thread; as long as you tell me I wont be mad. Sometimes we all just have too much going on, or get bored. We can always plot somethign else.

If you don’t ship our muses; Some people just don’t work together, and maybe they should just be friends. Friends aren’t a second place trophy, and I wont treat them like they are.

If your text is fancy; concentrate on the words you use, not the aesthetics. Wont matter to me if you took an extra how ever long making the words little, if I’m only getting two words back anyways.

If your replies match mine in length; Sometimes you can’t find enough words, and you shouldn’t feel bad. As long as you tired your best.

You know what I do care about? That you think of it more like fun, than work. If it’s just work interacting with my muse, then tell me, because something needs to change.

[goldenbeastkeeper]

"I'M KIND BECAUSE I CHOOSE TO BE" PROMPTS *  assorted dialogue for remaining good despite it all, adjust as necessary

they've suffered enough.

i have seen the worst that humanity has to offer... and yet i'm still standing.

the world can keep knocking me down, but i'll get back up.

i don't give up.

i just want to live a peaceful life.

i don't want conflict.

there were nicer ways to ask that, you know.

i don't want to hurt anybody.

i still don't hate you.

i want peace at all costs.

if you would only try and see the world from my point of view.

i don't want to fight with you.

things always get better.

this isn't the end.

you have to stand tall.

the world is cruel, but i won't be.

i believe in you. i always have.

my morals are firm.

there's no harm in a little kindness.

just be gentle with them.

i mean well.

there's too much pain in this world. i don't intend to add to it.

i don't want to fight anyone.

don't you believe in yourself?

i'm not leaving them.

there is enough hate in this world.

i try to lead with love.

it's the right thing to do.

this doesn't have to end in violence.

why don't we talk this through?

maybe he's having a bad day.

i'm going to try again.

there has to be another way to do this.

this isn't the time to quit.

i've seen too many things go wrong. this has to go right.

i'm not giving up just yet.

kindness is not weakness.

you can do better than that.

i try to see the good in everyone.

you can't just give up!

you're a special person.

i deserve better than this.

you deserve happiness.

it costs nothing to be kind.

there's no need to be so mean.

if only you could see yourself the way i see you.

it's still a beautiful day.

there's always tomorrow.

are you asking me to quit?

tomorrow will be better.

you didn't mean that, did you?

maybe we should talk this out.

i will always choose to be kind.

despite everything, i just want to be good.

i do my best to see the good in everyone, no matter what.

you didn't have to do that.

that wasn't very nice.

do you have to be so rude?

a nice word goes a long way.

try smiling at them. see what happens.

you could try being nicer.

i deserve a happy ending.

don't beat yourself up.

don't talk about yourself like that.

i see the goodness in you.

life is truly beautiful.