gonch-ni

[gonch-ni]

i am not joking we need to force teach cooking in schools. like. it is an essential thing for survival. do you know how easy it is to make things if you know even the bare bones shit about how cooking works. we need to teach teenagers how far you can take an onion and some other veggies it’’s sad that people grow up not knowing how to prepare literally anything. and i’m not talking about oh this home ed class taught me how to make chicken nuggets at home i’m talking about learning the balancing of sweetness and acidity and saltiness and bitterness and shit like that and techniques and oil temperatures and how meats cook. it needs to be taught because it’s literally not even that difficult and it matters so much

[gonch-ni]

Twilight AU where the Cullens arrive to Forks 23 years earlier and Edward falls in love with Charlie because of the quietness of his mind and Billy is like "no, don't befriend the Cullens, you're so sexy haha", but Charlie is, you know, unconditionally and irrevocably in love with him.

[gonch-ni]

I would pay good money for The Hobbit - The Musical if it was structured like a Bollywood production with dance numbers this rad

Putting a hardstyle track over this Bollywood movie worked amazing [x]

[gonch-ni]

Putting a hardstyle track over this Bollywood movie worked amazing [x]

[gonch-ni]

Fanfic Writers: Director’s Cut

Reblog this if you want readers to come into your ask box and ask for the “director’s commentary” on a particular story, section of a story, or set of lines. 

Or, send in a ⭐star⭐  to have the author select a section they’ve been dying to talk about!

[gonch-ni]

Nostalgie à Laurel

I went back to Laurel, where my family used to have a chalet, for the first time in years. A bright sunny day that transforms into a big thunderstorm always brings back many memories from my childhood.

Skirt: old Ingeborrg Cami: Fint Top: Amavel Bag: Metamorphose, temps de fille Sandals: earth, music and ecology Brooch: Axes Femme Earrings: Wego

[gonch-ni]

glow in the dark || s.o.

[gonch-ni]

What Bilbo and Thorin do in bed. Sign treaties, authorise requisitions, pass laws, eat.

[gonch-ni]

This is literally the trillionth time I confuse her for Summer Glau. I see the face, think Summer, and then go Wait... Summer wasn’t in that. Was she?

Kong: Skull Island (2017) dir. Jordan Vogt-Roberts.

[gonch-ni]

Nostalgie à Laurel

I went back to Laurel, where my family used to have a chalet, for the first time in years. A bright sunny day that transforms into a big thunderstorm always brings back many memories from my childhood.

Skirt: old Ingeborrg Cami: Fint Top: Amavel Bag: Metamorphose, temps de fille Sandals: earth, music and ecology Brooch: Axes Femme Earrings: Wego

[gonch-ni]

picture this

you’re in your late-20’s, early-30’s; you’re married and have two young kids. together, you live in a large house in the countryside. the house could use renovating, but it doesn’t need it.

wildflowers grow all over your large property. bees buzz by, but never sting. they make honey for your family to sell and enjoy.

in your backyard is a garden. you and your spouse wear overalls and bandanas while you harvest the fruits and vegetables you’ve worked so hard on; you sell whatever you don’t eat.

next to the garden is a pasture: you raise cows, bunnies, sheep, and chickens. you’ve taught your children to collect eggs every morning, while you and your spouse milk the cows.

although you have technology, wifi, and service, your family doesn’t rely on it for entertainment and communication. you play board games, read books, and write letters.

your house is your own. you fall asleep in the arms of the person you love, happily content with life.

[gonch-ni]

Reading amazing fanfiction, then forgetting to bookmark it

[gonch-ni]

“Wink at Satan”

[gonch-ni]

Climate change

This piece has been translated by me, fully and truthfully, from its original Russian.

Original piece: Facebook

Original author: Arkady Babchenko

Topic: UN climate action summit, September 2019 – global warming and Grata Thunberg

“The world has gone mad, if it listens to an uneducated teenager screeching from the high rostrum 🙁

I’m going to be trending today; because this topic had been in the back of my head for a long time, but now it’s in the forefront. But first, a little bit more on those who twisted the mind of this poor Swedish girl with their fight against global warming and brought her to hysteria and hunger strikes.

Sweden, the country in which she lives, contributes the least to the destruction of the planet. As does the rest of Europe, as do the USA, Canada, Japan, and other countries in the first world. In developed countries the garbage is sorted upon collection, they don’t cut down the selva*, they don’t pour oil well fluids into the taiga, they don’t pump production waste into the ocean, they don’t shoot Asian Elephants, of which there are only thirty left in the world**, they don’t throw garbage in the river, and they don’t practice barbaric fishing.

All this happens only in third world countries. Mumbai alone pollutes the ocean with plastic in ways that probably the whole European Union together does not.

There is one absolute guarantee way to stop the barbaric pollution of the planet by third world countries.

Everything is very simple. If there is a place where the law works, and there is a place where the law doesn’t work, it’s necessary to transfer working laws to places where the laws don’t work.

If you want to guarantee the stop of the Amazon's deforestation, and the local government is unable to do this, you send troops to the Amazon, declare it under international protection, and establish an international protectorate over it.

If you want to guarantee the end of elephant poaching, and the local government is busy cannibalizing its people, you send in troops, depose the government with human flesh in their fridge, and install your sovereignty over the elephant’s range.

If you want to stop the expansion of the Great Pacific Garbage Patch, you send troops into Mumbai, declare the local practice of throwing shit into the rivers and burning the dead in them, with the consequent sending of all this into the ocean, outlawed.

This is called colonization.

It will solve the girl’s problems.

Do you want it?

I somehow doubt that.

That infantile Swedish socialist leftism – which put her on a flag and began dragging her like an icon all over the world, and will completely destroy the psyche of this unfortunate child – will choke on hatred if you offer them to create an armed squad and send it to protect the planet’s lungs. Never mind enter it themselves.

If you want to stop the Faroe Massacre, arm Sea Sheppard and give them an international mandate. Everything is simple.

But no.

They will kill you, literally, if you propose they limit the right of Afghan peasants living in the fourteenth century to cut off the noses of their ten-year-old girls because they ran outside without a veil. Because there is nothing holier than democracy and human rights. Even if that human cuts off his children's noses. Or, having come to Sweden, beats his children with a computer cord, for which he is deported from the country, and another crazy Swedish activist stops the deportation plane so that he can continue to beat and cripple his children in her country.

Rangers in Africa assaulted poachers for killing elephants, and they are now on trial – no, not the poachers. The rangers***.

And at the forefront, of course, are the socialist infants of all countries.

Everywhere global corporations come, the local ecology improves. It has never happened that IKEA comes somewhere, and all hell breaks loose.

But no.

Infantile socialists fight, for some reason, not with those who dump the contents of their trash can directly into the rivers – while six-year-old children swim along these jams of shit on boats and collect plastic scraps and hand them over for a dollar a day for recyclables – they fight IKEA and other capitalists who’ve enslaved the world.

And here I have a question.

Tell me, friends, why didn’t you send the girl to Iraq, to tell them they can’t burn oil wells in Kuwait, or to North Korea to tell them they can’t conduct nuclear weapons testing, or to Russia, to tell them they can’t burn half of the neighboring Kirkenes, or to Nigeria, or Chad, or Indonesia, or Columbia, or any other wonderful countries, but to the United States, where just throwing a package into the ocean lands you in prison for a month to contemplate your part in global warming?

I’m not asking them to drag this girl to Iraq. God forbid. Although I have no doubt they will twist the girl’s mind and it will end with some kind of struggle for Palestine's freedom against Israeli fascism because that’s how it always ends; and the poor girl will go to the Democratic Republic of Congo to fight for poachers’ rights, where they’ll behead her. But the very fact of the questions strikes me every time.

Do you want to stop the pollution of the planet, 90% of which is contributed by China, India, Russia, Brazil, and the entire African continent? Then why the hell are you coming after the United States?

If you’ve ever wondered what brain liquification looks like, this is it. When adults, instead of sending a child back to school, drag her on a yacht across the ocean, where she tells, from the rostrum of the League of Nations, that she doesn’t go to school due to global warming...

The whole world is crazy.

Totally. Completely.

Populism, and the snotty inability to make decisions is everywhere, in every crevice of it.

A sixteen-year-old teenager, who hasn’t attended school in a year, is the last expert whom I’d like to listen to from the UN rostrum on any global issues.

Planet Earth will be fine. It’s survived a collision with Thea, at least two ice ages that lasted millions of years each, the Carboniferous period, when the globe was so hot that today’s global warming seems abysmal in comparison, the Yellowstone eruption, the Yucatan meteorite, Siberian Traps, and thousands of other catastrophes that we can’t even imagine. She will digest our plastic and emissions in a measly ten thousand years and not even notice.

The Earth will be fine. And in sixty-five thousand years she will birth new intelligent life forms. And I’m not sure that that’s the worst that could happen.

I really am sorry for the girl, though. Her life and psyche will be completely ruined.”

*Dense equatorial forest.

**Correction: there are about 40,000. They are an endangered species and their numbers are swiftly declining every year. Their population has been cut in half over the last three generations. This is due to poaching and habitat destruction. Elephants reproduce slowly, and it will be many decades before they can increase their population. If this continues, they will go extinct. Please consider with me to take preventative measures and put a stop to the ending of this species.

***I couldn't find any news articles on this. It is unconfirmed and the original poster didn’t provide any links. I will add if I can find anything.

[gonch-ni]

There you go again

Setting yourself up

To flame out spectacularly

To repeat the past

Like you forgot how the story

Goes, the avoidable tragedy

You, cast in the hero role

Suffering valiantly

Time to play it all over

Saying everything is different

You know you are no different

Repetitive crash course

The wrong skills retained

You must have come to crave

The taste of smoke and ash

Crash & Burn

[gonch-ni]

[gonch-ni]

Did anyone else REALLY like that bee’s eyes can CANON turn red from legit anger? Frankly my “bee was born decepticon” headcanon is TREADING INTO CANON WATERS MY FRIENDS