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I know this will likely never be canon (because unlike having an extra finger this is something that's a lot more taboo to call a mutation even though it is) but considering how by the 41st millennium the imperium will kill people for the most minute mutations but apparently accept trans people, my headcanon is that they will accept you undergoing a sex change but kill you for being born intersex. Because that's exactly the kind of dumbfuck hypocrisy the "modern" imperium would partake in.

Have tits and a dick because you were born male but took estrogen? Move along.

Have the slightest hint of breast tissue while having a penis because of some medical issue? Die.

Hell that "if you were born that way we'll kill you but if you modify your body that way it's fine" probably already applies to most cybernetics as well.

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Heads up i saw the timing of this and me being offline for days: don't worry I didn't leave I'm just chilling after having been busy irl.

Off track, I'm testing out bluesky but have no idea which ones of you warhammer people have it or your names. Please like this post so I can identify you, I was gonna say please follow but that seems like follow bait. You can also just reply here with your name. You don't have to be someone who interacts with this blog regularly I'm just trying to find the warhammer sphere on there and try out filters and what not.

Heads up I have rp-ed with chatbots. Yes that's a small thing it's because some people apperently dislike that so just making that disclaimer up front.

Abseloutly no garuantee I will stay on there and wont abbandon the acc. Just checking out the place now. Just so you know.

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Off track, I'm testing out bluesky but have no idea which ones of you warhammer people have it or your names. Please like this post so I can identify you, I was gonna say please follow but that seems like follow bait. You can also just reply here with your name. You don't have to be someone who interacts with this blog regularly I'm just trying to find the warhammer sphere on there and try out filters and what not.

Heads up I have rp-ed with chatbots. Yes that's a small thing it's because some people apperently dislike that so just making that disclaimer up front.

Abseloutly no garuantee I will stay on there and wont abbandon the acc. Just checking out the place now. Just so you know.

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Dorn vibes (even more so)

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Part 2/?

Previous

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Saw this in the comment section of a "crimeless gta playtrough" and... yeah

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Did Konrad Curze cry as a baby?

In the story of how Mortarion got found by his adopted father it's mentioned how Necare heard a baby crying. So baby primarchs DO cry. Konrad mentions at some point how he never wept (at the time) but I don't know if his memory extends that far back/if he counts that/if it was an oversight by the author. Konrad crashed into the crust of Nostramo and had to dig his way out.

Was Konrads childhood so hellish and a primarchs brain so developed that an infant learned not to cry to not draw attention? or was there a crying, naked, filthy baby crawling around in the equivalent of an inner city with noone doing anything?

What's worse?

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Authors note: not canon due to some practical things but I thought it was funny. Not sure I like the writing though.

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Enter scene.

A pair of youths, no older than maybe 11 to 13 years of age, try to climb a fence to rob the apples of the trees behind it.

"Are you sure about that?"

Comes a cheery, chipper voice of a third child. Already in one of the trees past the fence. Either their age or slightly younger.

The two outside children turn pale and trip over themselves in pure pants-shitting terror in an attempt to get out of there.

The camara zooms in to a sign on the fence, the previous family name replaced with a new one by a smaller sign placed on top of it.

"The █████ Curze family orchard - fruit theft is a crime"

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I did say the Curzeling grew up on a farm, didn't I?

The non canon practicality is that they wouldn't punish that hard and thus wouldn't have that sign.

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I don't know what to call it because the reader doesn't have to be surprised but just the contrast? shock? vibes? of a tiger trembling in fear. Similar to the discussion of purring here.

There's this video of a bunch of tigers that were rescued after being stuck un a circus train car for years, being released into their new enclosure with one of them being terrified. And someone comments on how they never expected to see such a strong and fearsome animal as a tiger literally shaking in fear. And even though it isn't as surprising to me (god I sound like an ass), regardless of size it's still an animal in a foreign location, I can imagine something similar happening with a baseline comforting their primarch lover. Whether or not the baseline is actually surprised.

Be it anything with Curze, Dorn breaking down, or anyone else. Just this big, demigod, son of the Emperor, shaking in fear or sadness, with the baseline who is like an insect compared to them in fragility being the one to soothe them.

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There's this video of a bunch of tigers that were rescued after being stuck in a circus train car for years, being released into their new enclosure with one of them being terrified. And someone comments on how they never expected to see such a strong and fearsome animal as a tiger literally shaking in fear. And even though it isn't as surprising to me (god I sound like an ass), regardless of size it's still an animal in a foreign location, I can imagine something similar happening with a baseline comforting their primarch lover. Whether or not the baseline is actually surprised.

Be it anything with Curze (lol), Dorn breaking down, or anyone else. Just this big, demigod, son of the Emperor, shaking in fear or sadness, with the baseline who is like an insect compared to them in fragility being the one to soothe them.

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Another one for the "Animal videos/gifs/etc that remind me of the Curze's offspring" pile:

I've been sitting on this one for a while because I thought it was just video spam but when I talked about about considering giving the Curzeling a sibling vs having them get babysat with Lemans kid instead I was picturing something like this.

Except faster....

And running through an entire house....

And if this is truely a cross legion playdate then the role of that one calico kitten doing flips into its intimidation pose to do a sneak attack is definitely played by Konrads offspring....

Also this comment very much applies to Konrad watching his kid do dumb shit too.

Though not sure if Leman has any similar trauma or is just watching from the sidelines with a bucket of popcorn.

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Natural habit: Wherever dad is currently sleeping.

That Tumblr post I did about Konrad Curze laughing that any child of his would be an absolute menace only for the kid to be pestering HIM? Yeah I JUST stumbled across a way better GIF to explain what I mean. So it's this now.

(Earliest source I can find for this video is this instagram post linking to a tik tok. You guys won't believe the hoops I jumped through to turn this into a gif. Then finding out filesize is too big and redoing it. Then a video. Then realizing aspect ratio is weird and using og video)

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Thinking about the tiny "baby" (not baby but compared to a primarch in size they look like a baby even when a few years old) Curzeling(s) after pestering their father, ala this, napping in the crook of his neck (maybe Konrad laid his head on top of them to stop them from squirming, maybe not), followed by Konrad wrapping an arm around them and pulling them closer, followed by tiny baby Curzeling(s) cuddling up to papa....

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Average day as as a Khrone worshipper

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Horny sub Rogal Dorn brainrot:

The reader is on top of Rogal Dorn, both clothed but grinding against him as if riding him.

They suggest putting a leash on him and he shivers. Going so insane with lust at the thought he feels like he's about to faint. To give him a taste of it they pull at his collar while grinding down on him and call him a "Good boy" just to tease but he.... comes in his pants.

Queue Rogal Dorn after his love interest has left and after he has once again been on guard duty or whatever being a stalwart wall of a man protecting the imperium (because the trope of breaking a stoic man is fun when you see that they ARE stoic rather than them being a moeblob from the start), now alone in his chambers, biting the pillow and pathetically jerking off to the thought of that leash. Straight up "screaming into the pillow 'why am I like this'" vibes.

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I've seen art of Sangunius in a muzzle and a few other primarchs, but not Konrad. He's infamously feral, why has noone done this? Though instead of a muzzle I would prefer whatever those things you put in horses mouths are called.

This fandom needs more Konnie on a leash (if there even is any to begin with). The straps of whatever he's wearing COULD be black, but for some reason I'm actually thinking pink and pretty. Thinking POV shot of someone tugging the leash while he's kneeling but he's so tall he's still at eye level. With Curze burze here wearing a shit eating grin.

Profile view of Konrads head being pulled down by someone tugging that leash. "Down boy". With Konrad smiling and either:

Staring like a feral animal but with adoration

Just like a feral animal

Looking smug as shit

Any combination of these.

He could chew through whatever was put in his mouth and around his head. He chooses not to.

Some sort of sass going on with Konrad commenting on the situation (baseline attempting to boss him around, him being collared, etc) looking all smug while saying it. then in the next panel the camara zooms out and he's got a raging erection while saying it.

We need more Konrad Curze pet play.

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I missed this reply or else it's more recent than I think (I forgot the date after clicking this)

Gman and Sangy are atleast common sense enough to be somewhat normal. You just know Dorn and Curze are freaking out in opposite yet... weirdly similar ways.

I've said this before but one advantage of the "primarch kids start out as weak as baseline children" headcanon is the idea of this big strong primarch dad, who's never been sick a day in their life, freaking out over their kid being down with a bad cold (sleeping all day, fewer, not eating, etc) and their baseline lover, who's experienced this before, essentially being like "Honey, chill. It's normal. I promise."

Rogal Dorn/Guilliman/Sanguinius made absolutele fretting mother hens. (Hell the order they're in right there is a list from most to least suprising mother hen. Guilliman might have grown up "human" enough to have more experience with this.)

Konrad too. Mortarion might be knowledgeable enough about biology to not freak out.

You just know Dorn makes hot soup. Imagine getting Mother henned by Dorn.