gthambat-a - Tumblr blog

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tumblr said i “liked” your post, but in reality? i loved it. i love you

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I’ve been lazy...I want to write.

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Robert Pattinson for Dior Spring 2021 Men’s Collection

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Robert Pattinson photographed for Les Inrockuptibles, November 2018

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Rumi, tr. by Raficq Abdulla, Selected Poems

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🦇 STARTER CALL.

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robert pattinson for dior homme ‘i’m your man’ 2020 campaign

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me : HAVE I TOLD YOU THE GOOD NEWS ABOUT BRUCE anyone : DON’T EVER.  me : okay but .....

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                “ i found salvation last night ”   /  @toendwar​​

HE  DOESN’T  KNOW  WHAT  TO  DO.  Throat  dry,  and  FEET  stand  still.  He  is  ALL  awkwardness,  and  MELENCHOLY  BLEEDS.  How  he  wishes  he   could  be  ANYONE  else  in  this  moment,  WILL  he  ever  be  what  SHE  needs  ?  Bruce  doesn’t  want  to  think   about  that  BIG  ambiguous  question.  Thing  is  ?  He’ll  constantly  disappoint,  NOT  out   of  want  but  out  of  sheer  DUTY.  He’s  SUPPOSED  to  be  this  billionaire,  this  LARGER  than  life  figure,  and  PERHAPS.  PERHAPS  if  he  had  been  dealt  a  different  cards  he’d  be  a  DIFFERENT  man.  DIFFERENT.  The  word  resounds,  and  FILLS  up  headspace.  He  looks  at  the  woman  who  is  in  his  STUDY  now,  and  he  wishes  he  was  WORTHY  of  such  words.  Then  again  he’s  doing  what  he  does  BEST,  he  ASSUMES.  

                    ‘  I’m  not  who  you  want  ----  I  look  at  you  and  I  see  a  woman  who  deserves  more  than  I  can  GIVE  ”  WORDS  heavy  as  he  tries  to  be  as  eloquent  as  possible,  ‘  I--I  I’m  not  saying  this  to  UPSET  you  or  to  be  UNGRATEFUL  but,  what  I’m  saying  Diana  is  TRUTH  ---- SIMPLE  ,  to  the  point  ’  IF  only  she  met  him  a  few  years  later.  He  would  become  COMFORTABLE  with  the  man  he  was  meant  to  become.  NOW  ?  He’s  awkward,  UNCOMFORTABLE  with  playing  GOD  when  it  comes  to    ARKHAM.  Bruce  looks  once  more  at  Diana,  ‘  Salvation  is  not PERMANENT.  I  am  slipping  away  each  day  . . .  ’  He talks  about  his  training,  what  he  had  ONCE  believed.  Bruce  Wayne  is  going  through  a METAMORPHOSIS.  ‘  THIS  is  how  you  can  know  me  ’

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fingers woven together are too fragile & intimate. / fucking is easy. fucking is easy? // i pick at my skin when i am anxious.

— from Chorus, eds. Saul Williams, Dufflyn Lammers & Aja Monet (via lifeinpoetry)

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rp sentence starters taken from  r.h. sin’s  work  ,  planting gardens in graves 

“ i find comfort beneath the stars ” “ i am free from you ” “ loneliness was the reason i held onto you ” “ you felt like home ” “ all you ever gave them was a town filled with misery ” “ my best relationship was with myself ” “ when people let me down all i had was me ” “ fall in love with my soul first ” “ they’ll always request your trust while betraying you ” “ you are not difficult to love ” “ what is there to love about a person who doesn’t love you ” “ losing you was not a loss ” “ i think i’m better now ” “ all the things that make you happy are either harmful or temporary ” “ they left you when you needed them the most ” “ fuck this idea that you need them ” “ you deserve so much more than what you’ve had ” “ i wear my sadness beneath my smile ” “ i’m not trying to pretend to be happy ” “ i’m just trying to remain strong ” “ all those second chances but everything remained the same ” “ you failed to walk away ” “ i’m way too observant to be fooled ” “ i notice and discover things yet i say nothing ” “ you were my favorite vice ” “ i had to bury you with the rest of my bad habits ” “ you were no longer deserving of my effort ” “ i don’t believe that and neither should you ” “ remember all the things you’ve survived ” “ find your peace and protect it ” “ sometimes you have to choose yourself ” “ people leave too soon ” “ i guess we should bury them deeper this time ” “ you’ve always had value ” “ i was always fighting but no one fought for me ” “ you’ve been searching for peace in chaotic souls ” “ at first the loneliness stings ” “ there’s no reward for coming in second ” “ i no longer desire to watch from the sidelines ” “ the fear of being abandoned keeps us unhappy and alone ” “ i thought i deserved to be unhappy ” “ the worst feeling is not knowing what you’re feeling ” “ i fell in love with your potential ” “ my tolerance for bullshit seems to diminish with age ” “ life appears differently the more you live it ” “ all i’ve ever known is hate ” “ i left myself behind to search for you ” “ my anger is a mask that hides my pain ” “ your lies were so loud ” “ beware of devils who tell lies in an honest tone ” “ my father didn’t raise me ” “ you are just like your mother ” “ your insecurities are not burdens ” “ lonely people do lonely things ” “ my father was the first person to break my heart ” “ you are no one’s instrument ” “ be careful who you make your memories with ” “ they’ll do anything to destroy your peace ” “ i found salvation last night ” “ the truth is i’m drowning in silence ” “ i remember falling ” “ someone taught you to associate anger with passion ” “ what leaves doesn’t deserve to be kept ”

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THERE  is  much  to  be  said  for  ANOMITIY  after  all  ?  He  understands  it  PERFECTLY.  Acutely  aware  of  surroundings  as  he  surveys  the  crowd  that  had  been  BROUGHT  together  for  the  latest  charity  ball.  Dressed  to  the  nines  as  GOTHAMS  rich  seem  to  MOCK.  Bruce  understands,  even  ACCEPTS  his  position  in  a  life  such  as  this.  Though  JUSTICE  seems  to  be  a  DRIVING  force  in  which  he  conducts  most  of  his  affairs. 

                                                ‘  That’s  what  I  heard  ’  Hands  in  pocket  as  he  then  goes  to  look  down  at  the  clipboard  and  pen  that  are  attached  to  table,  ‘  Then  again  a  LUNCH  with  a  Nobel  prize  winner  seems  . .   overwhelming,  or  stupid  depends  on  how  you  see it  ’

                                                               /  @thefixer​

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This thing with everyone knowing you, it’s weird, because people have this one-sided relationship where they look at your picture and feel they know you more than someone they actually know. I don’t really know myself that well.

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toendwar​  

THE CORNER OF HER mouth twitches. Expectations? How peculiar to even entertain such a concept. For expectations lead only to a gravely road with rocks that catch on your ankles and knock you down, your palms bloodied and knees bruised. No, she has not carried expectations in her arsenal for well over a century. So, she says, “ I do not expect anything from you, Bruce. But I do wish you were taking care of yourself. ” 

She sprays sugar over her coffee like specs of falling snow. She does not care too much for the coffee, and her teeth ache at the sugar, but she’s desperate to occupy her hands. To keep them from exploring his skin in a search for fresh bruises. Really, she’s trying not to stare. This is her trying. “ Are you? Taking care of yourself, I mean. ” 

                                        ‘  𝗧𝗔𝗞𝗜𝗡𝗚 𝗖𝗔𝗥𝗘 𝗢𝗙 𝗬𝗢𝗨𝗥𝗦𝗘𝗟𝗙    ‘                                                                   . . .     The  words are almost  comical.  The  diner  has  CHEAP  lighting,  probably  ILLUMINATES  purplish  skin  that  will  mar  his  body  from  this  day  onward.  Tells  himself  that  he  has  to  be  prepared,  that  it’s  only  a  matter  of  time.  He  chews  on  inner  cheek,  and  hopes  that  he  can  carry  himself  with  some  decorum.  Does  he  look  as  AWFUL  as  he  feels  ?  DON’T  ANSWER  THAT.

                                      ‘  Alfred  seems  to  think  I  could  sleep  more  ’  Bruce  gives  the  smallest  smile  as  he  then  shrugs,  ‘  You’re  not  going  to  drink  that  are  you?  ’  FAINTEST  hint  of  humor  as  he  then  reaches  for  water  glass,  ‘  You  must  be  REALLY  worried  . . .  coffee  isn’t  you  Diana  ’

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Emily Dickinson, from The Collected Poems; “I Think I Was Enchanted,”

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THE BATMAN (2021) dir. Matt Reeves

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                                       ‘  Do  you  feel  better  about  it  ?  ’  YOUNGER  age  hits  as  it  sits  uncomfortably  upon  frame.  There  are  some  bruises  that  don  visage  as  he  KNOWS  that  she  dare  not  ask  [  NO  ONE  DOES  ].  As  if  when  you  have  money  you  are  EXCUSED  from  the  societal  norms.  He’s  been  training  more,  BULDING  UP  BODY  AS  IF  TO  SHIELD  HIM  FROM  THE  OUTSIDE  WORLD.  It’s  better  when  you  are  NOTHING,  easier  to  take  on  the  world  with  little  or  no  ties.  Parents  brutally  murdered  and  now  ?  ALL  he  is,  is  a  fortune.  A   LAST  NAME  that  to    SOME     still  mattered.   ‘  Sometimes  it  doesn’t  get  easier,  it  just     IS   . . .  I  guess  to  some  that’s  the  PREFFERED  way  ’                                                         /  @herhaunt​