harrytouchmybum-blog

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Dani in California (Epilogue)

I dropped off the Subaru and walked back up the hill to my rental. I packed up my bags and drove back to my school and my dorm, leaving Avila behind. Everything felt empty.

5 years later.

I sat on my vineyard sipping a glass of wine. I never thought I would drink again but after I changed my major, I needed to grow a taste for wine, which I did. It wasn’t until I got a letter from Rachael in the mail telling me that her and Niall are engaged that I vividly remember that week 5 years ago.

Me and Harry agreed to delete each other from our lives. All the pictures needed to be hidden, the dress he bought me needed to be sold, and even our numbers deleted from our phones.

But then I started to think about him. Would I see him at the wedding? Is he seeing anyone? Has he changed? I couldn’t think of it anymore. Then I finished the letter, ending with Rachael asking to have the wedding at my vineyard in Napa.

[harrytouchmybum-blog]

Dani in California (14)

Dani’s POV:

I got ready Sunday morning waiting for what was about to happen. I would have to say goodbye to Harry forever. What was I going to say? I pretty much broke up with him, he said he loved me, I secretly love him, but we both knew it wasn’t going to work. There’s no other way to put it!

As I got into my little red bug, I wondered how I was going to fit all of One Direction in my car. Then, I ran down the hill to borrow my mom’s car and settled for the Subaru. I drove to Harry’s hotel to pick them up then I realized that Harry was the only one there.

“Umm hi,” Harry spoke first. “The boys decided to drive with Rachael, so it’s just us.”

“Oh…” I couldn’t say anything. I was too distracted by him. His eyes, his hands, his velvet voice, all took me back to memories that were tattooed in my head. I love him, but I can’t say it.

We got into the car and drove silently to the airport. I plugged in my phone and played some music. I heard Harry softly humming along and it sent tingles down my spine. It was taking all of my energy to not stop the car and hug him and kiss him and never let him go.

Harry’s POV:

I had to do something. But what? She made up her mind and that stubborn, beautiful, lovely, amazing girl would not change her decision.

“Do you mind coming with me to the terminal?” I asked. I wanted to spend every last minute with her.

“Sure.”

She’s been so quiet lately and it’s making me nervous. She’s never quiet. When we reached the terminal, I couldn’t help myself. I put my arm around her waist and I pulled her close. I saw her tearing up so I pulled her into a full hug. I wanted to shield her from the world. Dani, that beautiful disaster that changed me forever. I couldn’t stop with a hug. I lifted her chin up and I kissed her. It was our most passionate kiss ever, in the worst setting ever: an airport terminal.

“Harry…” She began.

“Shhh love.” And I kissed her again.

Dani’s POV:

I told myself this wouldn’t happen, but I really hoped it did. He kissed me again and I couldn’t help but to kiss him back. I loved him, and according to the monitor above the boarding area, I had 4 minutes to enjoy it.

“I love you,” He said.

“I love you too.”

“Dani, I—Wait, what? Did you just say—”

I shut him up with another kiss. It wasn’t until the flight attendant announced that the first group of people would be boarding when we stopped.

“Before you leave, Harry, I have to say this. I love you, so much that it hurts. I want to be with you forever but we can’t. We’re both at different places in our lives that even if we wanted it to work, it wouldn’t. I love you and you love me, and if we really loved each other, then we can have this feeling later in life. But we can’t wait for each other, because we both have to live our separate lives. If fate wants us together, it will make it happen. But right now, I love you too much for you to ruin your life, your dream, and your career on me.”

I was rambling on and on until he kissed me, which made it so much harder to let him go. The attendant announced that they would be closing the boarding area soon.

“Harry, you have to go.” I started tearing up again.

“Dani, just remember that I love you and that will never go away. We will see each other again, I promise.” And with that he lightly kissed me again, then pulled me into a tight hug. “I love you.”

I didn’t say it back. I didn’t want to ruin that moment. I kissed him on the cheek and we said our goodbyes and he boarded the airplane. My lips felt empty as I left that airport.

[harrytouchmybum-blog]

Dani in California (13)

Dani’s POV:

I haven’t talked to Harry in two days. He leaves for England tomorrow, hopefully forgetting me in the process.

I refused to let me think that he actually loved me. He couldn’t, it’s been less than a week and HE could not fall in love with ME. I couldn’t let him ruin his career or his life on some girl that he thinks he loves.

My thoughts were interrupted by a knock on my door. It was Louis. Reluctantly, I let him into my house.

“Hey Dani!” He said. “How’re you?”

I wasn’t feeling this at all. He obviously wasn’t here for my well being. “I’m good, but that’s obviously not why you’re here so just spit it out, Louis.”

“You got to take him back, Dani. He’s a wreck without you. He hasn’t slept or ate, he just lies in his bed with puffy red eyes. Harry needs you.”

“Louis… I can’t okay? I can’t let him ruin his life because of me. It would’ve never worked with him being and London and me being here. He shouldn’t of met me. In a month, he will forget about me and will move on with his life. I lov—like him too much to let his life spiral down because of me. I’m sorry.”

Louis pleaded more. “Please, can you just talk to him? If you won’t be with him then please just talk to him and give him closure. He needs to see you one last time.”

“Fine.” I reluctantly agreed. “I’ll drive you guys to the airport tomorrow and I will talk to him then.”

He thanked me and left. In reality, I wasn’t mad at Harry or anything. I just can’t see him because if I do, I will fall hopelessly in love with him again. And that is too dangerous.

[harrytouchmybum-blog]

Dani in California (12)

Dani’s POV:

Everything was perfect. The turkey, the mashed potatoes, the salad, the pumpkin pie, they all were cooked to perfection. My parents gave me some wine as a gift so that my guests could drink even if I wouldn’t participate.

The doorbell rang and people came piling in.

First, Rachael came in and shortly after Harry, Niall, Liam, Zayn, and Louis. I invited a few of my girlfriends that didn’t have anywhere to go for the holiday so that the three other boys would have people to talk to.

The dinner was going pretty well. Everyone, mostly Niall, stuffed their faces and thanked me for the evening. As people kept drinking more and more (thanks to Rachael for bringing more booze), we all settled for a game of truth or dare, something that I have grown to like a little too much.

“Niall, truth or dare?” Louis asked.

“Dare!”

“I dare you to kiss Rachael.” Almost like it was planned, Niall kissed Rachael. It was puppy love, really. So adorable because they both obviously liked each other but were too afraid to say anything.

“Harry, truth or dare?” Niall asked

“Truth.”

“What is your favorite food?”

“That is such a horrible question but after this week, it is In-N-Out!” Harry said. All the California natives cheered at his love for our West-Coast staple. “Dani, truth or dare?”

“Dare, definitely” I said, remembering our first round of this game just a few days back.

“I dare you to take a shot!” Harry slurred.

I froze. He knew how I felt about drinking. I understand that he was drunk but really? Instead of yelling at him, I excused myself from the game to go take a walk.

Harry’s POV:

I really did it this time. I am such a fucking idiot. I tried running after her but I was hammered. I finally caught up to her on the pier where she sat on a park bench.

“Dani, I am so sorry.”

“Don’t be.” She sniffled. She was crying and it was all my fault.

“No, I should be because, because Dani, I love you.” I tried to get out.

“Harry, please don’t say that. You’re drunk, you don’t love me, and you’re leaving on Sunday and never seeing me after that. So please, don’t make those kinds of commitments when you know you can’t keep them.”

I was speechless. I didn’t know what to say. All of it was right, besides her assumption that I didn’t love her. What was I to say?

“So… What does this mean?” I stammered. I didn’t want to hear it.

“I just don’t think this is going to work in the long run, Harry. I have school, you have a career in ENGLAND and we’ve only known each other for less than 2 weeks. I won’t let you change your life for me, you have too much going for you. I—I’m sorry.”

And with that, she was gone.

[harrytouchmybum-blog]

Dani in California (11)

woke up to Harry’s tussled curls popping out of the sheets. I hopped up, put on a tshirt, and went to go make some coffee. I hear a door shut and look up to see Rachael easing out her room.

“What’s with you sneaking out of your room?” I chuckled.

“Errrr, ummm, well, Niall’s in there.” She said quickly.

“Wait, WHAT?”

“We didn’t have sex, Dani! We just stayed up talking and we were cuddling when I woke up this morning. He wanted to tag a long with Harry.” She eyed me and I blushed because she caught me. I handed her a cup of coffee and we went to sit on the back porch and ate strawberries enjoying the sun.

We stayed out there for an hour until I realized I had to go grocery shopping. It was Thanksgiving and I realized I actually had to cook. Rachael and I went into the house to find Harry and Niall attempting to make us breakfast. Somehow they managed to burn toast, set bacon on fire and char pancakes. We laughed and opted for some cereal and more strawberries. Niall and Harry left to get changed and ready for the day while me and Rachael went to the store to get our Thanksgiving feast ready.

~~

Harry’s POV:

Tonight is the night. The night when I tell Dani I love her. I darted back to my hotel room to get ready when I get a phone call.

“Hello?” I ask through the speaker.

“Hey mate. Just making sure you are clear on the plan for Sunday.” Liam said. Sunday. The day I was dreading the most. The day I had to fly back to London. With or without Dani.

“Besides forcing me to go back to all of this pressure before I’m ready for all of this publicity and interviews and concerts? I didn’t know there was anything else planned except for leaving behind everything that really means anything to me anymore.” I said  bitterly. How could he expect me to go after this week that has changed me so much?

“Listen, Harry. This is not my fault just because I am the only one strong enough to tell you bad news. I’m sorry but management rules so just do the right thing but make sure you are at the airport on Sunday.” He hung up the phone.

I showered the conversation with Liam away and got ready. Nothing could ruin this moment. Except my nerves which were making my hands shake.

She makes me so nervous. Her laugh, her smile, her eyes, her heart. Everything makes me want to run away with her but a bigger power is telling me I can’t. Something tells me she wouldn’t let that happen; she’s too smart to run away from the security of a college education and her home for some guy she just met. She is glorious.

I called up Niall who came over while the other boys kept getting ready for dinner later.

“How do I look?” I asked. I was so nervous.

“I’m not going to answer that. But, I think I’m going to kiss Rachael tonight. It just seems fitting.” Niall responded.

“I’m telling Dani I love her” I blurted. I was so nervous.

“Holy shit, you win. How are you going to do it?”

“I don’t know, but I have to tell her before we leave.” I was so nervous.

“You’ll be fine, mate. Any girl would be lucky to be with you and that girl just happens to be Dani. Don’t worry, everything will be perfect.” He reassured me.

I was still nervous.

[harrytouchmybum-blog]

Dani in California (10)

We walk out to the balcony for our Thanksgiving-eve dinner. We all sat down with our plates filled with tri-tip, grilled bread, and a spinach salad that would make anyone drool. Me and Harry sat next to each other at a round table outside as Zayn, Liam, and Louis sat around the table with Rachael and… Niall? sitting at another table. Then I get a text from Harry:

Aren’t I a good match maker? ;) xx

I smiled. He really was. Let’s just hope this turns out well for Rachael and Niall and me and Harry.

“So I was actually just thinking that maybe we should have a separate Thanksgiving from my parents so it’s not as crowded.” I brought up.

“That’s a great idea!” Louis said and Liam and Zayn nodded.

“Brilliant idea, babe.” Harry whispered. I could feel his breath in my ear again giving me goosebumps.

“Then it’s settled!” I announced. I literally cannot wait for tomorrow night because I’ve always wanted to have my own Thanksgiving!

We kept talking about about San Luis Obispo vs. England, In-n-Out vs. Nandos (by that time Rachael and Niall came over and sat with us), and summer vs. winter. It was getting late and I was shivering so Harry gave me his jacket. We left everyone and went to go walk on the beach.

We held hands.

“So I’m very sorry we intruded on your holiday.” Harry blurted out. What?

“What are you talking about? You didn’t at all! It’s actually relieving to have friends my age here so I don’t have to do those awkward ‘you are going nowhere in your life’ talks with my relatives.” I said. Don’t get me wrong, I love my family, but they don’t like any of the choices I make in regards to my education.

“Well, I’m glad I could help you there, babe.” He smiled and leaned in to kiss me. I kissed him back. He made me feel so much more certain about everything I was doing.

We sat on a bench on the pier and I talked about everything. I talked about how I want to be a wedding planner, how I want to have a better relationship with my mother, and how I have never been out of the state of California. And he just sat there and listened. It was great to have someone listen to everything.

Then he talked; about his family which I really wanted to meet, how he always wanted to learn to play the guitar, and how he wanted to get a new tattoo. I listened to his deep voice just talk and I soaked in every word he said. I can’t say we know everything about each other because we don’t; it’s been such a small amount of time. But I can say that I have never felt this way about someone ever before…

~

We went back to my parents’ condo and parted ways. Me and Rachael went back to my house while the boys left to their hotels; we decided it was best to spend time with our friends. Rachael and Niall exchanged numbers.

Rachael and I got back to my rental as soon as possible so we could shut the door and scream. Happily, of course, because she got Niall’s number.

“Ohmygosh, ohmygosh, ohmygosh, this is so exciting. You two are totally gonna get married.” I fan girled to her.

“Pshhht, not even we’re just having fun,” She said as she smiled down at her phone, obviously getting a text from Niall simultaneously with me getting a text from Harry.

All Niall is talking about is Rachael. Miss you. xx

I showed Rachael the text and she started to scream. We stayed up talking about Harry and Niall and everything in between. We went to sleep in our respective beds. Just as I am falling asleep I hear a little tap on the door coming from the balcony. I turn the balcony light on and see Harry’s face there.

“Harry! You scared the crap out of me!” I quietly screamed.

“Sorry, I just…. uhhh… I just can’t stay that long away from you.” He looked at me with his puppy dog eyes and his body shivering a little. I stared into his eyes and then I kissed him, letting him into my room. Despite being freezing, we take off each others clothes, still kissing. We slid into my bed still kissing and we were there all night. After everything and as I was dozing off to sleep, I swore I heard:

“I love you, Dani.”

[harrytouchmybum-blog]

Dani in California (9)

Everything was perfect. Harry asked me to be his girlfriend, I said yes. My best friend was coming to spend Thanksgiving with me. My family and my sister were just a block away from me. So why is my ex-boyfriend standing in front of me?

“What are you doing here?” I asked.

“I need to talk to you.” Derek said. We dated Senior year and I broke it off when I went to college because I lost feelings for him. But seeing him here brought back all the memories I have suppressed since then. 

“Okay, talk. I want to know how you know where I am and why you’re here.” I said calmly. I just find this whole situation really awkward. Why was he here?

“I just want to win you back, Dani. I seriously have changed since high school and I got a transfer to Cal Poly just for you.” He kept talking about things we did together in high school and I really didn’t wanna hear it.

“Stop, Derek.” I finally said. “I’m sorry, but I don’t feel any different. You are a great guy and you deserve someone who loves you back, but I’ve moved on since high school and you need to, too.”

He was quiet as he stood up and left, not bothering to close the door. I felt really bad. I hate making people feel bad but I don’t know what I was supposed to do. I just didn’t feel anything for him anymore.

“Was that Derek?” I hear Rachael’s voice coming through the door and shutting it. I lifted up my head and ran and hugged her. I haven’t seen her in ages.

“Yeah, he just sorta came over and asked me to take him back but I said no and that’s it. Super awkward.” I said. She looked tired, driving all the way from UNR to Avila in her little blue Honda.

“Wow that is really weird. So where’s my room and where’s your man?”

I showed her to her room and we sat on her bed explaining how me and Harry becameme and Harry. As I finished, I got a text from Harry saying he was at the pier.

“Rach, we gotta go, Harry and his friends are at the pier.”

“Alrighty, let’s go meet these guys.”

~~~

We walked down the hill to see a group of 5 guys, one of them was Harry. They whistled as we walked down the hill and me and Rachael walked to meet them.

“Hey guys!” I hugged all of them and left Harry for last. “This is my best friend Rachael. She is gonna be spending Thanksgiving with us. She’s studying to be a teacher and she can dance like no other.” She shook all of their hands and said hi as the introduced themselves. She was smiling like no other.

We walked to my parent’s condo and everyone was introduced to my immediate and extended family. All the food was ready as everyone besides me grabbed a glass of wine and made their way to the food table and my group of people decided to sit on the balcony and talk…

[harrytouchmybum-blog]

Dani in California (8)

I was in shock. Harry just asked me to be his girlfriend.

“Yes.” I started to lean in to a kiss but he was one step ahead of me. We passionately kissed in our perfect private lagoon in perfect unison as the waves crashed behind us. It was perfect and I can’t even describe how magnificent this moment was. Just us.

I pulled away even though I shouldn’t have. I wanted to stay there forever. I held his hand and I pulled him out of our beach. We walked up to my rental and cuddled together until I realized I fell asleep.

“I’m sorry I fell asleep,” I whispered, a little groggy even though it was in the afternoon.

“It’s okay love, you’re too beautiful to wake up.” God he was perfect. I looked up at my phone: 10 missed calls. 2 from my mother and the other 8 were from Rachael, my best friend.

“Shit.” I whispered.

“What?”

“This sounds really bad but I forget my friend was spending Thanksgiving with me and she’s here I think.” I chuckled. Rachael has been my best friend since Junior year in high school and while she was in Nevada getting her teaching credential, I was at Cal Poly so we haven’t seen each other in ages.

“Do I get to set her up with one of the boys?” Harry smiled.

“She would love that!” I laughed. I got out of bed and got a different outfit on than I wore to lunch. “Harry, we’re gonna leave in like 30 minutes, I need to call Rachael!” Before I could even dial her number, she was calling me again. “Hey slut.” I said as I answered.

“BITCH! I’ve been calling for ages! Where is your house in Avila? I’ve been roaming SLO for hours!” She said.

“Sorry, I uhh fell asleep. I’ll text you the address then we will all leave for my parents.”

“Okay, I have this really cute outfit to wear if any of your cousins are cute” She kept rambling. We were like two peas in a pod. We were both crazy and had life goals that seemed extremely unreachable. But we didn’t care. We lived each day like it was our last in high school because we seemed invincible. Then I heard her pause, “Wait, Dani, did you say ‘we will ALL leave?’”

I couldn’t keep it from my best friend even until she got to my rental. “Rachael, I’m in a relationship with a guy named Harry… Harry Styles.” Silence filled the other end of the phone. “Hello? Rachael?”

“Holy shit Dani! I’ll be over soon I’ll see you soon. Love you, bye.” The phone went silent. I just laughed. Typical Rachael. I went back to Harry whose putting his shoes on.

“Well, Rachael will be here soon, and she’ll be super loud, but that’s why I love her.” I said.

Harry laughed. “Alright, I can’t wait for dinner tonight. I’m going to go back to my hotel to change then I’ll round up the boys and we will meet you two at the pier. Sound good?”

“Yup! I can’t wait!” He came over to me and kissed me.

“I’ll miss you.” He said, pulling me into a hug.

“You’ll be gone for less than an hour, you’ll be fine with out me” I laughed.

“Will I though?”

“Yes, now go get dressed and I’ll meet you at the pier!” I let go and shoved him out the door. Wishing that he would never leave my side. I closed the door and smiled to myself. I am going to have everyone I love in one place tonight.

A knock was at the door. I ran to get to see my best friend. I was wrong.

“What are you doing here?” This could not be happening.

[harrytouchmybum-blog]

Dani in California (7)

I drove up to my little blue rental and found a delightful surprise: no paparazzi. Finally, I could be alone. I opened my door and there was nothing out of the ordinary; the TV turned off, leftover coffee in my coffee pot, and the glass Harry used when I gave him water the first night we met.

I wondered if we were taking our “thing” too fast. We were completely comfortable around each other and everything, but we’ve only met a few days ago. Who has ever had a compatible, sustaining relationship in less than a week?

Relationship. Are me and Harry in one? Are we ever going to be “boyfriend and girlfriend?” Are we going to be together with thousands of miles apart or just a fling? All these questions were stopped by my phone buzzing. I got a text from my little sister:

A LITTLE SURPRISE?! YOU CAN’T FOOL ME, DANI, I READ TMZ.

Busted. My sister knows. Don’t tell mom. I texted her back and a instantaneous response was sent back. Don’t worry, I’m not stupid. But I can’t wait to meet him.

I just laughed and got in the shower. I got ready slowly so I wouldn’t be able to think about the whole “relationship” thing.

Soon enough, I got a text from my mom saying they were here and I went down to their condo to help them unpack. It was a lush condo fully furnished with all the wants and desires of an interior designer; it didn’t have the view I had, though.

I gave all of them welcome hugs and we caught up from the last time we (me, my sister, and my parents) were all together. I texted Harry to tell him to come down for lunch as we all sat down at the Custom House to eat, making sure there was an extra seat right next to me…

“So what was this surprise you were telling me about on the phone?” My mother asked, as my sister giggled and my dad nibbled on his chips and salsa cautiously.

“Well,” I began, “I’ve been seeing someone and he’s meeting us for lunch today.”

“Ohhhh! What’s his name!?” My mom asked.

“His name is Harry Styles.” My family went silent. My dad stopped chewing. My mother stopped ‘fan-girling.’ My sister smiled big. It wasn’t what I just said that made them so shocked. It was the hands that I felt on my shoulders that could only belong to my boyf—-Harry.

“You must be Dani’s parents. Hello, my name is Harry. And you must be Sara; Dani has told me many things about you.” He smiled and shook my parents’ hands and gave a hug to Sara; she almost started crying.

He gave me a peck on the cheek as he sat down next to me, taking his hand and putting it in between my legs.

We ate lunch together on the patio over looking the ocean. Harry acted like if everything was normal but he was being drooled over by my sister and my mother. Even my dad was surprised; he’s been hearing about One Direction ever since their X-Factor days from my sister. They didn’t even talk; they just kept staring. It was so embarrassing! Seriously, can’t my family treat him normally? Like, REALLY?!

Thank God lunch ended. We said our goodbye’s and told them we would meet them for dinner. Me and Harry decided to go on a walk to this hidden beach before dinner. We held hands.

“Sorry about lunch.” I blurted out abruptly.

“What are you talking about?” He asked. “It was perfect.” He pulled me into a hug and we slowly swayed, just as we did in his hotel.

“I don’t know, they just seemed so flabbergasted that we are together.” I said. Shit. Did I really just say that. “I mean, like dating. No, hanging out. uhhhhhh….” I couldn’t speak. I just totally screwed this thing over.

Harry just laughed. “Dani, do you honestly think that we aren’t a thing?”

“That’s just it, Harry. What is our ‘thing?’” He pulled away from our long embrace. I looked down, sad because I knew I blew it by jumping ahead of the gun by saying we were dating.

“Dani, our ‘thing’ cannot be defined. It is so much more than words can describe. You have found some way to have me become a better person and find myself along with falling for you and becoming apart of me forever. You are perfect and when I’m with you, it’s magic. Nothing can change the passed few days when you have entered my life and hopefully never leave. I feel like I’ve known you my whole life, Dani, and I know I’m rambling but I just can’t describe how much you mean to me. What I’m trying to say is, will you be my girlfriend?”

[harrytouchmybum-blog]

Dani in California (6)

“Hiya Harry!” A boy with blonde hair said and they all came running towards him engrossing him with a hug.

“Errrr, hi guys,” Harry said, trying to get out of the cave of the cute British boy band. He finally got out and put his arm around my waist protectively and said, “Everyone this is Dani. Dani, this is Louis, Zayn, Niall, and Liam.” They all said hi to me, then the one named Louis spoke.

“So, this is the girl that ‘stole Harry’s heart!’” He said as I blushed and looked down. We headed toward the seating area in Harry’s room. We sat in an over sized chair while the rest of them sat on the couch and other chairs. Harry still had his arm around me.

“How did you guys get here so fast?” Harry asked, sounding a little annoyed that they were here. I played with his hair to make him relax.

“Well, as soon as the tabloids were out, we got on the first plane out here! The plan was to spend the holiday here and then all of us leave this Sunday.” Liam explained, putting an extreme emphasis on “all.”

“You guys can spend Thanksgiving with me and my family if you have nothing planned! My aunt makes a great turkey.” I said. My little sister is going to freak out when they come to dinner.

“Count us in!” Niall said. We all talked for about 30 minutes or so before they left for their rooms. Finally, we were alone.

“You know, the reason I took this trip was to get away. I love all of them but I just needed some time away from them and the fame and—-” I shut him up with a kiss and we didn’t stop for a very long time until we ended up in his extremely comfy bed—Tempur Pedic, I assumed.

The lights were still on so it was kind of awkward so I got up to go turn off the lights.

“Is that a tattoo?” Harry asked. In fact it was. I didn’t expect him to see it, nor did I want him to. “Erm, yeah it is,” I replied as I turned off the lights and ran back into bed. “What does it mean?” He asked.

The date 4-19-10 was tattooed on the side of my body, right where a swim suit or a bra would hide it.

“The date was the day my brother died.”

Silence.

“He picked me up from a party because I couldn’t drive, and a drunk driver hit us and flipped our car.”

Silence.

“The firefighters got me out and sent me to the hospital for severe bleeding and a concussion. But my brother didn’t make it. He died instantly”

Silence.

I hunched over and started crying. I curled into him and then Harry rubbed my back. “I am so sorry Dani.” I didn’t answer, and I don’t think he expected me to, I just cried in his lap until I fell asleep.

~~~

I really didn’t want to wake up and face Harry. After last night, he knew about the weakest point of my life and I didn’t want him to hate me… I turned around to look at him; he was already awake. Damn.

“Hey.” He said, as his voice ranged from concerned to cautious in all but one syllable. “Uhh, hi,” was all I could get out of my system.

He looked at me but I looked away, I just couldn’t get myself to look at those piercing green eyes.

“Dani… I’m not good at this because I never really have extremely personal conversations…. But I just have to get this out. I’m very sorry for your loss. I can’t imagine what it feels like to have someone taken away from you so abruptly. You are an amazing person and you don’t deserve the sadness you carry. I hope you know that I will always be here to talk or be a shoulder to cry on and I want to be the person you go to for that.” Harry stops and lifts my chin so I’m forced to look at him. The tears I held in started to drop.

“Thank you, Harry.” I said and he pulled me in for a hug.

I felt secure in his arms, safe. The arms wrapped around me like a blanket, protecting me from every little worry in the world. We stayed there until I heard my phone buzzing in the background.

I sniffled, wiped away the tears, and unwillingly got out of Harry’s arms. “Hello?” I asked, not looking at my caller ID.

“Dani! We’re gonna be in Avila in about 2 hours, just as a heads up!” My oblivious mother rambled on and on about how excited she is to see me.

“Okay, I’ll be ready. We could meet for lunch at Custom House? And oh, Mom, I’ve got a surprise for you and especially Sara, but don’t freak out.” I laughed. We said our goodbyes, and feeling better, I spoke to Harry.

“I should probably go but at 12, do you wanna go out to lunch with my family and me? Then, you and all the boys are more than welcome to come to dinner too!” I spoke a little too quickly; I was getting jumpy that Harry was going to meet my family.

“I would love to, and I know Niall would never say no to a great meal.” He smiled and pecked me on the lips. We said our goodbyes and I drove back to Avila, almost like the last 10 hours never happened…

[harrytouchmybum-blog]

Dani in California (5)

There was a lot of traffic coming in to Avila Beach today; I sorta figured, since the weather was perfect in the middle of November and it was two days before Thanksgiving. I’m driving my red vintage VW bug up to my rental and there it is: a mob. Paparazzi, fan girls, and news reporters. EVERYWHERE. I guess people weren’t here for the beach.

“I am so sorry Dani,” Harry said. He seemed upset, but I just shook it off. I hate seeing people sad or awkward, I’ve seen too much sadness and I don’t like it.

“It’s alright, we’ll just go in from the back,” I said casually. “But just so we’re in privacy, do you think we could spend the night at your place until things die down?”

“Of course” he said as he took my hand off the wheel and kissed it. I will not be able to shake off the goosebumps I get from him.

We decided to park behind the property so that the mob couldn’t get in. We sprinted through the back door. He helps me pack but more than that he distracts me. Now and then he would hug me from behind and kiss my neck that sent tingles down my spine. I didn’t want it to stop! But the reality of it was we were being watched. I couldn’t leave the bedroom with out getting a picture taken of myself and Harry. But soon we were off and we got out of there as fast as possible.

“You know how difficult it was to not rip your clothes off in front of those cameras?” Harry asked cheekily.

“Geez, Harry, at least buy me dinner first” I said jokingly. He smiled then said, “Okay! I heard my hotel has a great dinner service.” I just rolled my eyes and thought of the irony: Harry Styles wanted me and is trying to impress me.

This is unreal.

~~~

We get off the freeway and drive to the Madonna Inn, the coolest hotel ever and probably pretty expensive. We walk into this room with blue walls and a giant fire place. There’s something about the homieness of a fireplace and the warmth that radiates off of it. I decided to tour the room, because I might as well soak it in while I can.

I go into the bathroom and boom: a rock shower. It’s this cascading waterfall of beauty. Okay, I’m definitely showering here, I thought.

“Do you like it?” Harry asked. In an instant, I replied, “It’s amazing.” I turn to him and wrap my arms around him. I didn’t realize until we were swaying that my favorite song was playing in the background. We were dancing, amongst the chaos of the mob, the thrill of the sand dunes, and the cool features of the room, we were just swaying together in unison like nothing else mattered. We danced for it seemed like hours. He lifted my chin and kissed me softly.

I felt like I knew Harry my entire life. We didn’t know each other’s (well at least my) pasts and bad experiences but we were connected by fate. The way he made me feel and the way he was without the fame was something I have never felt before.

We stopped kissing. Harry spoke, “I’m going to go into town and prepare for tonight. I want you to stay here and get ready, preferably wearing that sexy black dress I took the liberty of packing for you.” I smiled, he was so cute and manly and amazing and perfect. Realizing I would probably say something stupid if I said something more than necessary, I just said “Okay.” And gave him a kiss.

He pulled away. “I have to leave now before I get ahead of myself.” He said and then he left while I got to try out that magnificent shower that has been calling my name.

~~~

I put on the last swipes of mascara when I got a text from Harry.

Go to the restaurant and ask for the reservation “Styles.” They’ll lead you to our table :) xxHarry

I smiled and walked down to the restaurant and did what Harry’s text told me to do and the host led me down to a back private room when I immediately saw Harry, my Harry, wearing a gray suit with a black tie. Wow.

He didn’t stop smiling ever since we made eye contact. I was blushing and he was grinning. We kissed and soon stopped realizing we were in public. Then, he took my hand and led me to our table.

“You look beautiful,” He whispered in my ear. He was such a gentleman with pulling out my seat for me and everything. Then, he took his chair and moved it so he’s sitting catty-corner from me, making sure we were touching. How is he so PERFECT?

We got our menus from our candle lit table. Harry ordered steak and I ordered soup. There wasn’t much talking early on, mostly just kissing and holding. We got our food and we dug in.

“Dani, we need to talk about us.” Harry said abruptly. I got a little freaked out, but there wasn’t anything to worry about. “I really like you Dani. I know we’ve only known each other for a few days but I feel like I’ve known you my whole life. I never expected to feel like this ever and then you just came into my life. But I don’t know what to do, because your family comes in town and in a few days I leave for London again and then you have school. Dani, tell me what to do.” He looked extremely upset and confused and scared.

I didn’t know what to do. He was right. Our 1-weekish romance would end in a few days. “I guess we’ll make it work if that’s the only thing we can do. We’ll have a lot of time apart, obviously, but summers and vacations and everything in between. The truth is Harry, I feel the exact same way. You’re brilliant and gentle and caring and I don’t want to spend a long time with out you; but if it’s either that or not being with you than I’d rather do that.”

I’ve never been that honest with a person in my life, but it has it’s rewards because we were kissing again. Harry couldn’t wait for the waiter to come back so he just put a $100 bill on the table and tugged me out of there. We barely got to his room with out ripping each others clothes off. We make it into the door when we suddenly stop like we couldn’t be 10 feet within each other. There, in Harry’s bedroom, were four other guys, I’m guessing the other members of One Direction.

[harrytouchmybum-blog]

Dani in California (4)

“So, darling, what do you want to do today? I want to get your mind off of this entire situation. Anything you want, we’ll do.” He said with his deep voice perfuming the air. Could anyone be anymore attractive?

“Well first, I would like you to change your clothes,” I laughed; he was wearing the same clothes the whole time I’ve seen him (besides with out them on) and he needs different clothes. He smiled and pulled out car keys. “I’ll be back in an hour, by that time, get dressed and think of something to do that you truly want to do.” I looked at his cheeky grin as he leaned in for another kiss. As he was leaving, I joked, “What if I want to do you?!” He stopped, turned around and walked toward me, whispering in my ear, “That can wait for tonight.”

Goosebumps. He shut the door and was gone. I started to think of all the things we could do, thinking of nothing that sparked huge interest. Honestly, I just wanted to cuddle up all day with him and watch movies. But he obviously wanted to go out, so I opted for a cold shower and some new clothes.

~~~

I felt like we have been together for years, because of how comforting his arms were when he hugged me and of how familiar his scent was. But I’ve known him for a day and a half, and I kept that out of my mind because I was way too happy in the present.

“So, figure out what you want to do?” He asked. I just giggled, got on my tippy toes and started kissing him. He groaned as he moved his hands all over my body. “God, I don’t want this to stop.” The only sentence he got out before we made it to the bedroom.

~~~

“I thought I said we would do this later!” He said, but I just laughed and said, “When I want something, I go get it. Now get your clothes back on, we’re going to the sand dunes.” He smiled his cheeky grin and got up to get changed.

A few minutes later, we were out the door. He drove and turned on my favorite radio station. I hummed along while I saw him glance at me and smile every now and then. We reached the sand dunes and as soon as we got all the paper work filled out, we got our ATV’s and went for a ride.

We raced along the dunes getting huge air and sand everywhere on our bodies. I got stuck a couple of times, but Harry helped me out and we were off riding once again. Our 2 hours were up and we took our ATV’s back to the rental shop. After, we went to the closest In-N-Out and grabbed lunch.

“How have you’ve never had In-N-Out before?!” I ask surprised. It is the greatest concoction known to man.

“I live in England, remember?” Harry laughs, digging in to his Double Double. I laugh and take off the lid to my chocolate milkshake and dip my french fries. He laughs at me but I don’t care. We kiss after we scarf down our food. “Best. Meal. Ever” He said and smiled at me. Then he grabbed my hand and we walked to his car, back to my rental house, and we made plans to watch some movies. Finally.

[harrytouchmybum-blog]

Dani in California (3)

I felt the sun on my bare back as I wake up to the comfy bed, the waves crashing, and an empty bed? I wondered where Harry went.Figures.I thought, but just turns out Harry was just another guy that liked to get ass. But then I heard him, sounding a little upset, so I decided to hop out of bed and make some coffee.

“I just needed time away Paul!………………………. I know I let them down, but I……………” So Harry is talking on the phone with a man named Paul… I’m staring at his beautiful body and his wind shooken hair and then he notices me, his eyes as piercing green as ever. “Listen Paul, I just needed to get some time away, to find who I truly am, and I think I’ve found it. Just give me a few weeks; I gotta go” He hangs up the phone and walks towards me. His half naked body wraps me up in a giant bear hug and kisses me softly on the lips.

“So whose Paul, your secret lover?” I asked jokingly as I pulled away from my bear hug and poured Harry some coffee.

“He’s my…. uhhhh… body guard.” He says quietly. I stop drinking my coffee and look up. He looks at me, trying to gauge my reaction. 

“He didn’t really guard your body well since last night happened.” I said. I hate awkward tensions, so I try to make people laugh, even myself sometimes. Why did Harry have a body guard?

Like he was reading my mind, he answers my question. “I’m in a band called One Direction.”Shut up.I’ve heard of that band on the radio when my little sister was in the car but usually I don’t listen to that kind of music.

“Wait….. So you’re telling me… That…….. I just slept with……. My little sister’s favorite singer?” I asked. Startled, I sat down on the couch, hunched over and head in my hands. He comes over to me, rubbing my shoulders. His firm hands could have not felt better on my exposed back. “So you’re like famous or something?”

“I guess so,” Harry replied.

I wasn’t upset, but I was shocked. I slept with a celebrity! I spent one of the best days of my life getting to know someone that a million and a half girls are obsessed with. He has paparazzi on him 24/7!…. Paparazzi…. Shit.

I jumped up from the couch and Harry’s back rub and grab my computer. PerezHilton.com is the first thing I typed in to the computer. “Babe, what are you doing?” Harry asked, concerned. I got a little smug that he called me babe but that’s not the point right now. I typed in “One Direction” in the search bar. I was the first article that popped up.

“Harry Styles Finds ‘The One’: A Normal Girl!” I quoted as Harry face drops. What the hell is going on was the facial expression that him and I were sporting. He sits down next to me.

“Okay, Mr. Styles, explaineverything.”

~~~

And he did. He told me that after his tour with his band, he got really depressed. He didn’t have any doubts on if he loved what he was doing or not, because he did, he just wasn’t sure why he was doing it for. He thought something was missing. So he took a flight out to San Luis Obispo and came here without telling anyone where he was. But now since that article was out, he assumed his friends/fellow band members were headed over.

“So where does that leave us? I mean, I like you Harry, but you don’t seem like you’re going to stay with me in SLO since we’ve known each other for less than 48 hours.” I said. And it was true. I really liked Harry, especially with being so honest with me, but I’m just a normal girl who just happened to pick him off the street, and he was a celebrity, how would that work?

Apparently my silent thoughts actually were said because he countered, “You’re anything but normal, and you’re anything but a one night stand. You are the nicest, kind-hearted, beautiful girl I have ever met. Dani, listen to me, if you’re up for it, we can make this work. I promise you that I will stand by your side every moment of it.” I looked up at him and I couldn’t speak, because, again, I got lost in his eyes. He closed the gap between our faces with a kiss.

[harrytouchmybum-blog]

Dani in California (2)

I wake up from a peaceful sleep.I’m alive.I think to myself, knowing I had a stranger in my spare bedroom. I get my running shoes on and go on a run. With my iPod on full blast, I run on the beach to my favorite band, Boyce Avenue, until I tire and walk up the hill to my house.

I open my door and go check on the boy in my spare room. He’s gone. His bed was made and the banana was eaten and thrown in the trash can with the glass of water in the kitchen sink. There was a note on the bed.

Thank you so much for the hospitality. I would love to formally introduce myself to a lovely stranger. Meet me for coffee at 10 xxH

H? What does H stand for? I look at the clock; it was 9:15. I had nothing planned for today so I decided to shower and put on a band t-shirt and some high waist shorts with minimal makeup and went down to the coffee shop down the hill.

I decided to sit down and wait for H to arrive. I was early so I decided to read The Great Gatsby and then I see a shadow cast down on me. I look up to see the actually sober H standing there. His cheeky smile spread across his face as he looked at me. He extended his hand then he spoke.

“I never really introduced myself, but my name’s Harry. I want to apologize about what you saw last night, but I also wanted to thank you for helping a complete stranger last night. I never knew there were such courteous people out there but now I met you and now I do know.” I took his hand. “Nice to meet you Harry.”

“Will you please tell me your name?” He asked. “I have been dying to know.”

Maybe it was my stubborn attitude I had at the moment, or it was the fact that this gorgeous boy standing in front of me, but I decided to make him work for my name. “If I tell you my name, then I have given you what you’ve wanted. You have to talk to me first.” I said raising my eyebrows. “Stubborn, I like it.” He grinned and sat down next to me.

We started talking about all of us. He said he was from England and he decided to come to Avila to get away from the stresses there. I decided not to push him on that because he seemed very upset about it and it probably caused the excessive drinking last night. So to change the subject, he asked about me. I told him I was a student at Cal Poly and I was here on vacation before my family came for Thanksgiving. After talking about our lives, we started to talk about books and movies and music and everything in between. We were interrupted by the owner of the coffee shop.

“Sorry to interrupt, but we are closing now.” He said. I looked at the clock; it said it was 2 o’clock. Four hours!!!! Time flew way too fast and I didn’t really wanted it to end.

Practically reading my mind, Harry said something to me: “Erm, I know this is sudden, but if you don’t happen to be doing anything today, would you like to go around town with me?” He asked carefully, making sure to not push it.

I responded, trying not to sound too eager. “I had nothing planned today, so sure! By the way, my name is Dani.”

~~~

We went to the pier and got deli sandwiches and saltwater taffy. We went on the beach, searching for sea shells and cool rocks. The day seemed endless, until we got ice-cream and sat on a bench, watching the sunset together.

“Let’s play truth or dare.” Harry said with a cheeky grin. Personally, I thought it was a childish game but hey, why not be a little spontaneous. I agreed. He asked me the popular question and I answered “Truth.”

“Where does this day rank on your favorite days?” He asked me. Honestly, it was one of my favorites; I had no plan, we did whatever we wanted to, and there was no stress involved at all.

“In my top ten,” I said. He smiled like he accomplished something great and we looked into each other’s eyes like we’ve known each other for ages. Blushing, I looked away and asked him truth or dare.

“Truth,” he responded. I’m not very creative, so I asked him, “What has been your favorite day ever?”

“Today!” He said excitedly. I laughed like it was a joke, but he stopped me. “No seriously! I haven’t had a day like this ever. I did nothing but absolutely everything at the same time and I spent it with a beautiful girl who I was so lucky to ever meet.” I smiled, blushed, and took his bowl from his ice-cream and went to throw it away with mine. I came back and he asked me “Truth or dare?” “Dare” I responded and he said right away “Go swimming.”

I rolled my eyes, but I never not do a dare, so I took off all my clothes but my undergarments and ran into the freezing cold ocean. I screamed, it was freezing! I then asked him the common question and he said “Dare” so I told him to join me. He did, not before taking off all his clothes except for those Calvin Klein boxers. He ran in the cold water to me.

There we were. Two random strangers who came together by fate. We were practically naked right next to each other in this water then I realized we had no towels, and it was so cold.

“Do you want to go back to my house? I have towels there!” I offered and he agreed. We ran quickly up the hill, still half naked, to get to my house as fast as possible. We got in my house, laughing at what we just did. We weren’t even half a foot away from each other when he asked me, “truth or dare?”

“Truth,” I answered. He gazed at me with those piercing green eyes and moved closer, if that were even possible.

“Would you be okay if I kissed you right now?” He asked. We were touching, our wet bodies close together with us staring at each other. Then I whispered, “Why don’t you find out?”

And with that we were kissing. It was soft at first, us kissing in my little blue house. Then, it was passionate. He grabbed my waist and lifted me on the counter so I could be the same height as him.Tall and strong,I thought as I wrapped my legs around his body.And ripped.He picked me up and walked me to my bedroom. He dropped on the bed leaving me on top of him. We rolled (that sounds weird, but that’s what happened soo…) and he went on top of me.

“Harry?” I said as he moved to kissing my neck. “mhmm” he responded, which sounded like a mixture between a moan and a response.

“I think…. we should… umm….” I was trying to get out the “I think we should slow down” but it felt so good. “Nevermind” I said as I reached his lips. I could feel himself smiling of satisfaction through the kiss and I did not care. I didn’t care that I knew him for only a day. I didn’t care that I barely knew him. I didn’t care that I am this uptight girl that would usually never do anything close to this. Because it was just me and him and this really comfy bed.

[harrytouchmybum-blog]

dani in california (1)

The waves, the wind, the sand, everything at that moment seemed so perfect. My own miniature paradise. I vacation to Avila Beach every Thanksgiving with my family but this year was different; it’s my first year in college, 18 years old, and on my own. Evidently, my college was 7 miles away from this hole-in-the-wall beach town in which I loved. I was here in Avila 4 days before my parents and all my family showed up.

I was sitting on the beach reading my favorite book, The Great Gatsby, taking in the warmth of the sun. The rhythmic sound of the waves must of been too peaceful because I fell asleep on the beach.Thank God I wore sunscreen.

I missed the sunset which I’m fine with because I’ll see one tomorrow. I went into the only grocery store in Avila to buy some ingredients for fajitas; I haven’t had a good meal in a while, dorm food and all…

“WHY CAN’T I BUY THIS? I WANT THIS STUFF NOW!” was what I got through the screaming drunk man at the cashier. He was slurring his speech but it sounded like he had an accent?

“Sir, you are not old enough to buy alcohol, I apologize.” the cashier responded. A few curse words later, the boy (not man, since he wasn’t old enough to buy alcohol) stormed out of the store. I bought my groceries, said sorry to the cashier about that boy, and walked out of the store.

I was walking out of the store and I saw that boy lying on a bench. I went over to wake him up because I didn’t want him to stay in the street with hobos, assuming he wasn’t a hobo. As he opened his eyes, I couldn’t help but admire his piercing green eyes. He was cute, very cute.

“Hey, I know you’re drunk, but everyone needs a place to stay at night, do you have one?” I asked, hoping I would get an answer from this hammered Brit.

“My hotel is in San Luis Obispo, so I’ll just drive home.” He responded.

“You are not driving,” I countered, picking him up and hauling him to my rental house. 20 minutes later—usually a 3 minute walk, but since I was hauling a drunk hot guy, it took a while to walk—we finally made it to my house in Avila.

My 2-bedroom blue rental house was up the hill from the strip of stores that is the town of Avila. The house had windows everywhere to give that beachy, sun-drenched look. Everything was small, the kitchen, the TV, even the shower. But the character of this house was marvelous. It had an ocean view from the back porch from which you could see everything from, whether it be the dogs running on the beach or the sunset that I had missed tonight

This boy was barely holding on so I dragged him to my spare bedroom and pushed him on the bed. I brought him a glass of water and a banana, but he was passed out.

Then I got a good look at him. His tousled brown hair was sitting on top of his head. He had a red sweatshirt on from a store I have never heard of. That sweatshirt lifted ever so slightly up so I could see his Calvin Klein underwear under his not-too-tight jeans. His beige Vans reminded me of the ones I had when I was in high school.

I go back into the kitchen and make my fajitas, they were delicious. Soon I fell asleep with my door locked, just in case this stranger was a serial killer…

[harrytouchmybum-blog]

alright so I'm going to post my old, extremely short fan fic on this site so I can delete my other blog. Yay for summer cleaning!

erin

[harrytouchmybum-blog]