heartablazed

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I’m always thinking about those little freaks

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Various Fish by YRAM Enterprises

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On my local weather channel theres this small 20 somethings guy who does the minor weather and my family is so enchanted by him. He wears the most egregious suits and ties that make my grandparents go off the rails. Sometimes he blends in with the green screen and my grandparents go farther off the rails. My entire family calls him "sheldon" because any skinny white geeky guy is Sheldon Cooper to them. There is currently a huge tornado on the way and they sent Sheldon to go check it out. Sheldon sounds like he's crying in the middle of this horrible rain and my grandparents are so upset about it. Sheldon could die out there. Why did they have to sacrifice him? Sacrificing their young. My grandmother has started a grudge against the main weather man for abusing poor poor Sheldon. I will update if Sheldon survives.

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guy who has ibuprofen: I have ibuprofen if you need it btw

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My edo period samurai roommate keeps telling me how i’ll bring shame and dishonor to our apartment if I keep forgetting to wash the dishes. Like whatever dude, I’m not the one carrying on a passionate yet illicit affair with the daimyo’s daughter whose hand has already been promised to another.

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completely incomprehensible email from my mom. sent from my it's

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i want to go to everywhere and see everything. 0 dollars please

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The fact that animals that care for their young will sometimes adopt others' lost or orphaned young to raise along their own is just funny to me. I know that it's all hormonal and there's no conscious thought involved in it, but the internal logic of it is so funny.

"Baby = success. More baby = more success. I have one baby and I found four other baby. I have five baby. I am being so fucking successful right now."

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Cheese for da worm

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shot in the HEAD. and you're to blame. You are not good. At dart game

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New medieval peasant cultural exchange post. Medieval peasant shows you the real night sky and you light on fire and explode.

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how i feel trying to draw something sensual

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INDEED.COM IS A BASTION OF DECEPTION AND DEVILRY

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God I just know tr*mp is gonna be insufferable on 9/11

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love saying "question mark?" out loud when I'm talking about something i'm unsure of