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[hellz69angel]

29 Things

i have twenty nine things in my room. twenty nine items that i can trace back to you. twenty nine memories surrounding you that i can provoke.

i have twenty nine things in my room. twenty nine things i will rely on. every single item serves its own purpose.

i have twenty nine stories perfectly scattered amongst me. standing out in the openness of my room, you’ve become my favorite piece of decor. i’ve never felt more at home.

the cigarette butts that you’ve pressed against your lips and the bobby pin of mine you cradled between your index finger and thumb all bring me such comfort.

to have the privilege of knowing that at one point in time we were experiencing us. being together, being in motion; becoming lovers.

every single one of those twenty nine things stemmed from feelings.

so i bury myself in my room with them just so i can feel again.

[hellz69angel]

sorry for acting batshit crazy I was feeling a little unwanted

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i am not equipped to deal with this

[hellz69angel]

10.18.23

[hellz69angel]

“it took the death of hope to let you go”

- Snuff, Slipknot

[hellz69angel]

Adore each other. Be fiendishly smitten. Be frantically in love. Can there be too many perfumes, too many rosebuds, too many nightingales? Can lovers love each other too much, be too enchanting, too beguiling, too charming? Is it possible to be too much alive, too happy? Adore each other, and never mind the rest.

— Victor Hugo, Les Misérables (1862)

[hellz69angel]

to be a girl is to wear bows and have unhealthy obsessions with authority figures

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[hellz69angel]

"Days will pass, and you'll abandon things you were addicted to, and leave someone, and cancel a dream, and finally, accept a reality."

– Nizar Qabbani

[hellz69angel]

the only thing to do is simply continue is that simple yes, it is simple because it is the only thing to do can you do it yes, you can because it is the only thing to do

Adieu to Norman, Bon Jour to Joan and Jean-Paul, Frank O'Hara

[hellz69angel]

“I want to wake up with you beside me in the mornings. I want to spend my evenings looking at you across the dinner table. I want to share every mundane detail of my day with you and hear every detail of yours. I want to laugh with you and fall asleep with you in my arms.”

— Nicholas Sparks

[hellz69angel]

Sappho, from If Not, Winter: Fragments of Sappho; tr. by Anne Carson

[hellz69angel]

Last night was hell; I feel completely paralysed, away from you; I’m not hungry; I can’t sleep; can’t read; can’t think. I’ll be all right, but not by recovering from missing you; only by learning, and it must take a good deal of learning, how to live with this huge whistling hole in my guts and heart. 

Sylvia Plath, The Letters of Sylvia Plath Volume I: 1940–1956 ⁠— Ted Hughes, 4th October 1956

[hellz69angel]

“She’s a star-gazer, a dreamy, sensitive soul. She’s a nymph taking refuge in her illusions. She wanders about in a garden, this sweet fanciful girl.”

— Victor Hugo, Les Misérables (1862)

[hellz69angel]