heterophbic-shiro

[heterophbic-shiro]

Jeit//h is a thing now, apparently? Sounds like jean Keith. If youre gonna make an ugly fujoshi ship then at least give them a name that doesn’t sound like a 2014 meme. Not to quote lm or anything, but Christ.

[heterophbic-shiro]

I struggle with typing because I'm autistic, actually. And you're really stooping that low as to respond with a goddamn furry gif and critiquing my grammar? Yikes.

Jeit//h is a thing now, apparently? Sounds like jean Keith. If youre gonna make an ugly fujoshi ship then at least give them a name that doesn’t sound like a 2014 meme. Not to quote lm or anything, but Christ.

[heterophbic-shiro]

Jeit//h is a thing now, apparently? Sounds like jean Keith. If youre gonna make an ugly fujoshi ship then at least give them a name that doesn't sound like a 2014 meme. Not to quote lm or anything, but Christ.

[heterophbic-shiro]

Iconic, immortal gay

shiro went to space, became a pseudo-dad, got cloned, then died, and yet he’s still kickin!! what a legend

[heterophbic-shiro]

have at it kids

[heterophbic-shiro]

👏T👏E👏A👏☕☕☕☕ I stan 😣😣😥😥

Why is this the funniest fucking post disbsibdjdbej absolute galaxy brained legends only

[heterophbic-shiro]

if you rb this, tag it as 'adashi' or 'shadam'! Pwease and thank you uwu

I’m so happy I just can’t even express it! He’s really gay! He really is!

[heterophbic-shiro]

ko-fi commission for @lesbianporg !!!

===>commissions are still open! <===

[heterophbic-shiro]

A comprehensive list of heterosexual Voltron characters

Zarkon

Lotor

Iverson

James Griffin

Every single other character is LGBT.

[heterophbic-shiro]

McCree: what are you drinking?

Hanzo: vodka

McCree: straight?

Hanzo: no, gay

[heterophbic-shiro]

Our first full character reveal is Rayla! Rayla is the youngest moonshadow elf assassin, but she’s the fastest and strongest of any of them.

[heterophbic-shiro]

This ask is fantastic in my eyes, because not only did I have to go through the inbox to find the strangest requests i could find, but it can give you a glimpse of exactly what kind of asks we get on a daily basis. Right on, anon! By the way, all of these are specifically copied and pasted from the ask box. No paraphrasing, this is actually what you guys have sent us in its true form.

Team Voltron reacts to some of the requests in our ask box

Pidge:

- Team Voltron reacts to Pidge being furry on main

- Paladins react to Pidge getting rabies

“you guys really want me to be like keith and lance, huh. you want me to suffer. i’m the only normal one here and you want THIS for me”

Lance:

- team voltron reacts to lance being exposed as a furry

“this is the only ask about me (aside from the ones with keith) and it’s about me being a furry :( guys why cant you just accept who i am”

Hunk:

- team voltron reacts to finding your Garfield erotica owo

- team voltron reacts to me voring their toesies owu

“i don’t know whether to be offended or relieved that there aren’t any asks about me but there’s shit like this. what the fuck”

Keith:

- Krolia reacts to Keith’s rabies

- How about,,, The Paladins react to Keith finding out the red lion has rabies??

- The team reacts to Keith finally being cured of rabies

- The team reacts to Shiro finally giving Keith his long overdue rabies shot

- team voltron reacts to me boiling keith’s raccoon

“YOU CAN’T TAKE AWAY MY RABIES OR MY RACCOON! RABIES AREN’T A DISEASE. IT’S A WAY OF LIFE AND IF YOU DON’T KNOCK IT OFF I’M G O̢ͪ͌̌̅̆̔̌ͫ͏͚̗̦̼̟I̡̻̯̹̙̱̖̻ͫͮ̈́ͯ̒̎ͧͥ̅N̵̛͔̙̬̅ͯ͑̀Ḡͣ̌͐ͪ͑ͬ͏̧̼̞̹̭ ̷̥̦͆̓̊̅͞Ţ̷̫̱̫̼̦̎̚̚O̐͊҉̙̥͠ F”

Shiro:

- shiro fucking a cactus in space? owo

- Voltron reacts to Shiro fucking a cactus

- Voltron reacts to Shiro fucking a space cactus

- team voltron reacts to me eating shiro’s ass

- Voltorn team reacts to you eating shiro’s fuxking ass

- Voltron reacts to Shiro breasting boobily

“owning who i am made me a better paladin and I would NEVER fuck a CACTUS. how would you get the needles out of your ass, why does everyone want to EAT my ass especially after there’s NEEDLES stuck up there, and what is it with everyone’s obsession with me FUCKING. LET ME REST”

Allura:

- team reacts to allura coming out as a brat? (a valid brat of course we stan a kween)

“clink clink bitch that’s me!!!! 🥂 and you’re valid as hell lmaoooooo dab dab whip nae nae bottleflip (lonce am i doing it right)”

Coran:

- I’m corankin what does he have to say about that

- the gang reacts to Coran going bald (yes even his stache)

- team voltron reacts to me eating coran out

- team voltron reacts to reader riding that sweet coran dick 😩😫💦

- imagine: coran blasting your pussy in an arby’s parking lot while keith bites you and infects you with rabies 😫😫

“i know. i’m a god amongst men and EVERYONE wants to raw me. listen, there’s enough of me to go around for everyone but it wont live up to anything because i’ve have the dick of a king. an actual king. you’re all peasants but i’ll settle because what’s a few men to an immortal”

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･these aren’t the weirdest of them all either･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

mod lotor unu

[heterophbic-shiro]

some more edits cuz i was bored……

[heterophbic-shiro]

SICK

👏👏SHADAM👏IS👏CANON👏KING👏👏

[heterophbic-shiro]

Bonus (forgive me):

Part 1 | Part 2 

[heterophbic-shiro]

halloween is long gone and over but it’s never too late for a random fairytale au

Part 1 | Part 2

[heterophbic-shiro]

Y'all just gotta stop sexualizing any affection shown between 2 men in media. Not in a “no gay ships anymore” way but in a “there are more than just sexual and romantic relationships, especially since open platonic and familial affection between two men is hugely stigmatized. This especially goes for characters who are heavily depicted as brothers by the narrative or are actually literally brothers.”

Like I see y'all taking two characters who have a bond as brothers in the narrative, and their open love for each other, and saying it HAS to be romantic love, that it’s More Progressive for them to be gay for each other and that it’s Queerbaiting if they aren’t Actually Gay For Each Other Specifically…. And holy shit ur missing the point.

Sometimes completely platonic relationships between two male characters with open and adoring affection is actually more radical than them being canonically gay with each other. Even if both characters are straight. And especially if the one character is actually gay.

I’m especially calling out all y'all who do this shit but blatantly ignore or shoot down f/f ships or canon couples bc they’re “actually more like sisters/friends”.