historyfactsimadeup - Tumblr blog

[historyfactsimadeup]

The scouse are hiding the gate to ether (in the mersey)

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Caesar was just a cool guy (he did not come back and threaten me to say this I swear)

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broccoli was never real, the incans bought it from divine llamas

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Darwin should have stayed at home (I’ve got the hiccups)

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Not immortal yet? Have you tried eating mummy dust?

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Princes in the tower were big Richy boy’s failed attempts at reanimation (source: trust me bro)

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1554 years ago today, the colour known as ‘seafoam green’ was invented by the french (for malicious purposes)

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duracell is the real time travel inventor (my future wife told me so)

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”fuck off” - some garden hermit about 200 years ago (and also me, today)

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Beer doesn’t exist (the victorians made it up to cover for their mummy-dust-protein-shakes)

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Always remember the 5th of February (very important, it’s my deathday)

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Somewhere only we know was Bach’s magnum opus

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william the conqueror knew something about normandy that we didnt. the time to run has long passed.

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queen victoria just needed to get laid

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the great fire of london was absolutely norman from fireman sams fault

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richard iii's only crime was not being good at hide and seek

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the bayeux tapestry: brought to you by the same grannies that knit shreddies