hopeless-unromantic-or-not

[hopeless-unromantic-or-not]

Compliment them. That person you think has their shit together and wouldn't need it or want to hear it. They do. They absolutely do. Their shit is dispersed. I promise you. It is a shambles.

I've had someone tell me to my face that they would compliment me, but for the fact that I already know this or that about myself. Huh???? No. Sorry.

No I don't. In my weaker moments I become an ungrateful mud monkey that has never once internalized a compliment

I adore being told you like me or something I've done. It sustains me, and in my weaker moments when I forget that life is good and happy, you might catch me before I fall.

You ever had someone catch you like that? You can do it too. The ones that catch you have been you in that moment before and know they will be again.

[hopeless-unromantic-or-not]

[hopeless-unromantic-or-not]

hey google how to apologise for being a fuck up without being too obvious

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Margaret Atwood, from True Stories: Poems; "Postcard," originally published in 1981

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wouldn’t it be cool if i could just ask “hey do you still like me” without literally wanting to eat my own organs out of shame

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having a crush should be #1 in 1000 ways to die

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too much love inside me disorder

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Every day I live feels like I want to be around longer a little less

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it’s not my fault it’s not my fault it’s not my fault it’s not my fault it’s not my fault it’s not my fault it’s not my fault itnotmyfaultitsnotmyfaultitsmyfaultitsmyfaultitsmyfaultitsmyfaultitsmyfaultitsmyfaultitsmyfaultitsmyfaultitsmyfaultitsmyfault

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No, I didn't "like" your post, I made you hot chocolate and sat down with you and draped a blanket over your shoulders

[hopeless-unromantic-or-not]

"do you have body dysmorphia?"

nah im just fat

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well looks like I’m getting a grand total of 2 and a half hours of sleep tonight yayyyy

[hopeless-unromantic-or-not]

uhm

tw vent?

yeah tw vent it’s a vent under the cut I guess

so right I’m really insecure about my weight and shit if I pass a mirror I either run away or feel obliged to look into it and I see my body and I see my face and my head points out all my flaws and like I get it I suck as some people have constantly drilled into me, such as the voices in my head and my ex girlfriend as prime examples

but the problem is I try exercising but it just doesn’t fucking work I do sport I go out I work out pretty often but there is no change whatsoever so I just feel obliged not to eat I skip meals when and where I can but I hate wasting food and when my parents have made food and left it in the fridge I can’t leave it there because then they’ll notice and I can’t throw it away because then I’m wasting food whilst people out there are dying of starvation and that makes me feel terrible but tomorrow I’m going on holiday and I won’t be able to skip meals I’ll have to eat because we’ll be at restaurants and my parents will be watching me like hawks so I will 100% gain weight and I’m already overweight enough as it is I don’t want anymore but I feel obliged to eat even when it tastes of nothing and feels like ash in my mouth I’ve just got a mantra of “be grateful be grateful people would kill to be in your position people are dying but you’re living comfortably people would give anything to have the food you’ve been given because they have nothing” and it’s just ugh and I hate it I hate food I hate myself and I hate everything and people are like ew I hate my body like nothing fits right or looks good but girl you’re skinny your body is where I want to be you could wear anything whereas I live in hoodies and wearing some dresses and shorts and tank tops and swimsuits are a challenge the girls my age are going on about bikinis and I swear to god I could never I’d rather die heck even my 8 year old sister has one and I just can’t do it it’s just no no no no no I hate it I hate it so much

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wondering if the what 4-5 hours of sleep will actually be worth it what if I just don’t sleep and then subtly get caffeine at the airport

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I have to wake up tomorrow and take a taxi at 3

my alarm is set for 2:10

only god knows if I will actually get up on time

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Me and my parents gonna have a talk tomorrow. About me. And transgenderisam idfk help

[hopeless-unromantic-or-not]

Nothing like a friend saying they don’t like your personality after you carefully made a fake personality so that they would like you