httplvki - Tumblr blog

[httplvki]

long Astarion analysis / ramble / self-projection

(disclaimer: this mostly focuses on the sexual abuse he went through and how it affected him) risen from the dead just to yap about astarion cuz of how much he’s a bit too relatable

Maybe I'm self-projecting on Astarion, but it's so relatable on how he manipulates Tav at the start because he wants protection and safety, which resorts to him having sex with Tav so the connection will be there with them. He believes that the only way to get Tav to stay by his side is to give up his body because it has become a habit of his to use his body for sex after 200 years of using it to seduce other people for his master. He “abandons” his boundaries and his own worth to have someone stay by his side, which hits a bit too close to home.

He sexualizes himself for the person and agrees on anything sexual because he believes that it will make Tav (in this context) happy, so they won't leave him if he just keeps presenting himself on a dinner plate. Especially in the scene where Tav wants to sleep with another member of the party and he says something along the lines of "It's not because we haven't done IT in a while, right?", where he's worried that Tav was leaving him because they haven't had sex together in a while, meaning that he believes that one of the only ways to keep someone by his side is to satisfy their lust. He believed that sex and his body were one of the only features that he had that he was able to use to keep others around and not leave him. He’s vulnerable when it comes to himself because he can’t think of himself as anything more than just a means to an end, which is why he needs Tav to be able to give him the reassurance that they will back him up and stand up for him whenever he needs.

We could also assume that he was sexually assaulted by the fools or villains (lowly criminals most of the time) that became Astarion's victims. Because almost 99% (assumption) of the time where he has had sex with victims, it was all dub-con (dubious consent where consent is unclear or not stated) at best because of how it was all forced onto him by Cazador. He needed to “entertain” them even if he himself didn’t want to, making it already not very consensual. With needing to seduce anything with a pulse almost non-stop, he is still very flirty with Tav even after romancing them, which I personally would like to headcanon that he could be a hypersexual, and he hates it because it makes him feel disgusting from the reminders of all the bad sexual experiences he had. (Just to clarify this is what I assume / hc)

After 200 years, he's used to saying sweet nothings to others to satisfy them, thinking it will work on everyone because it has after all the years of being a slave to Cazador. For instance in Act I when he said “I love you” to Tav, but it was just a lie, and even he admits it himself when Tav sees through his act. It’s all an act for his own needs and the other person's satisfaction and happiness. However, he comes across a hurdle if you play as Karlach and romance Astarion; he isn’t able to have sex with her because of her condition. He gets frustrated because he has never done anything else to manipulate someone other than sleeping with them; he doesn’t know what to do because it is out of his control.

The difference between choosing Karlach or Tav to romance Astarion is the level of control that he feels he has. If Tav refuses to sleep with him, he gets upset because he feels like he has done something wrong, and it means you won’t be able to trust him, which equals Tav is not going to fulfill what Astarion needs: safety and protection. He loses control in this situation because of the other person's own opinions and actions, which is a no-go for Astarion. Compared to using Karlach to romance him, he gets upset because he can’t sleep with her because of her condition, but he can understand that reason. He doesn’t take it to heart because it’s understandable to both parties, so in the end, Karlach and Astarion just talk and then fall asleep together. (I very much prefer Karlachs one because I wish we could do the same with Tav where we don’t have to sleep with him)

This is why I also believe that one of the other reasons why he wants power (that excludes taking over, Cazador, and his going through with his revenge) is to feel that he has some other power that he can have rather than only having his body as a source of "power" or “strength" that could manipulate other people.

Further discussion about Astarion and manipulation, he “manipulates'' Tav in the scene where he wants power after killing Cazador; he says, “You want what's best for me, surely?” Even after being romanced by Tav. he believes that ascending and taking part in the ritual will heal him from everything and become powerful, but in reality, he would just continue the cycle of abuse for another centuries on end. He loves Tav, but manipulation is already second nature to him when he WANTS something; it's just like breathing air to him because of how normal it is, and it will take a while for that habit to devolve after his traumatic years of needing to manipulate others to stay alive, almost just like Cazador where he will do anything and manipulate anyone or anything to get what HE wants. Furthermore, being manipulated by Cazador has caused a long-lasting effect on Astarion, where manipulation tactics are passed down and used.

Astarion was treated like a doll, controlled with strings to keep using his body to lure victims in, while he didn’t have any bodily autonomy to say no or to stop it. For example, later on in Act II-III, if you don't respect his boundary after he confesses to you, and you still WANT to have sex with him, later on in the cutscene where he and Tav are in bed together, he sits up, and his look shows that his mind is in another plane. He felt devastated, disappointed, and betrayed even because of how you treated him like a doll for seduction and sex, just like how Cazador used Astarion to seduce his victims. He later breaks it up with Tav once he realizes the feeling of being able to say no and have his own bodily autonomy.

[httplvki]

howls moving castle zhongluc

[httplvki]

#1 pookie protector Hobart Brown

[httplvki]

Goldenpunk under a starry night 🌌

A fanart for the fantastic writer @chaos-and-sparkles for a fic that isn't here yet but whose idea sounded stunning to me : Pavitr meeting a star deity, who's no one else than Hobie.

Close-ups and descriptions :

I thought immediately of Ponyo's parents (giant woman woooo) and nighttime on the sea. Pavitr might be in a dream, how come he walks on the sea ? And the galaxy seems to move and shape around someone's head...

Also, heterochromia was part of old Hobie's concept art, and I wanted to keep it since it was such a sick idea to show even more of the duality/inconsistency of Hobie's character.

Reblogs > likes

[httplvki]

I forgot to post this here. Some ASTV comic I did a while ago!!!

[httplvki]

Drew the kiddos :)

[httplvki]

theyre literally everything to me

[httplvki]

I CANT STOP

(The web heart was definitely Pavitr's idea and Hobie loved it)

[httplvki]

Read Kismat by @sunkraken !!!

Love this fic to pieces I was so happy when i saw that the fic was completed and I HAD to draw art in celebration! Hope you enjoy some of my favorite scenes from the fic!!

[httplvki]

if i see one more mf say “pavitr is 13” i will smack the shit out of them 😭 its his concept age you dense fucks

[httplvki]

"hey.. Calm down, I'm here"

*Context: The two escaped wounded from a battle and Hobie was the most injured, with Hobie grunting in pain, Pavitr calms him down by saying the above sentence ☝️*

[httplvki]

when did i have 900+ followers omg?? 😭 id like to apologize to every one of y’all because i keep changing fandoms <3

[httplvki]

thinking about pavitr and hobie saying “who did this to you?” when one of them gets hurt

(ive said this on ao3 already)

[httplvki]

People on tik tok saying Pavitr is 13 WHY DO YOU AS A PERSON GET YOUR INFORMATION FROM TIK TOK

[httplvki]

it anything happens to them in btsv im not gonna be crying in the theater like everyone else no bitch im killing myself

[httplvki]

def many new users signing up again to tumblr after twt ☠️☠️☠️

[httplvki]

no matter how old i get, i will always yearn for a father