icardigan-blog

[icardigan-blog]

DR3AM J0URNAL 3

November 20, 2016.

I woke up feeling terrified and weird as fuck from this dream... I immediately started typing it.. in my dazed stupor. It starts off a little jumbled and sentences become full as I wake up. It's not written like my other entries; my mind was still in the dream while writing this. So it's kinda fucked up and not super explanatory. ----------------------- We were at the house I Grew up in At ridge top dr. (In Indiana). A Strange man comes To the House and forces inside, seems friendly at first and we tell him to leave - he forces his way ; he had square blue stickers. he came up quickly and put a few of them on my hand. I was immediately scared and I started feeling dilusional. I knew it was bad. I was really messed up, drugged. He laid me down on the bed and started kissing me and I had no control of what I was doing. I started feeling woozy and getting hives. Whoever was there with me Convinces the man I need to go to the hospital. He threatened us with his pistol. He tried to Shoot us as we drove away. I could barely walk, talk, or breath. My mouth was feeling swollen. The nurse was a huge bitch. Basically said they couldn't help. (Then I got woken up by my roomie Callie played some rap music in the bathroom) Falling back into the dream I was back at the house, a red van came by and two women got out and came up to the house. we tried to lock them out, but they got in. Callie & I sat in front of my bedroom door , just like I used to when I was hiding from my mom as a kid, with our feet pushed against the dresser, so they couldn't get in. My feet never seemed to reach the dresser in the dream... I kept stretching but it was being elongated away. Callie wouldn't sit in front of the door and I kept trying to make her. Thus, the women got in. They slapped us with more blue square stickers. This time I had a lot of stickers on my body. The next scene I'm at the hospital, my mom is there. I was so happy to see her I was crying and couldn't breath. I was being wild, running through the hospital yelling "help me!".The problem was that there were no doctors "on the clock still" . My mom found a doctor she knew and begged him to help. They take me and lay me on a bed and get my temperature and things, while I lay confused. It was a lady doctor now. I start gagging on my tongue and puking , I turn to all fours and it's all stuck in my mouth while I'm pulling it out and an assistant young boy helped pull it out, his mom helped him help me get it on a towel and then we put everything in a container that the boy then got inside of in order to go take it to disposal, I spit inside the container after he got in. I apologized -sounding like a sock was in my mouth. My mom kept saying "don't swallow your tongue honey". I grabbed my tongue too, it felt swollen. The doc didn't realize I had hives until I told her and I was trying to tell her I was drugged and assaulted. She wasn't quite getting it, she and my mom walked to another room as I followed and I grabbed the doctors hand cause I was so scared. I kept saying how scared I was. When we got into another room I asked her if there were cops at the hospital I could talk with and she said I would have to call them on my own and report something if i wanted to. (Wtf!) I started getting a little better, scenery started changing, and suddenly Olive Garden was connected to the hospital. When I was trying to leave the hospital i had to clock out behind the bar at OG. Rachel was standing there and Said, "I rang that food in for u to pay for so don't worry."....I said, "what? I didn't have food." Then I realized when I first got to the hospital they tried to have me eat some pasta: angel hair and meat sauce. (Which was a memory from an earlier dream in the night where I had ordered angel hair and meat sauce for Kagan at an ihop). I was pissed about this... Still feeling woozy.... I walked out and then woke up. -------- Thanks For Reading ~

[icardigan-blog]

Love is NOT the cure? Agreed...

"The fact is, love is not enough. All those fairytales, all those stories and movies you’ve heard and watched growing up, lied to you. Love is never enough because love is not rational.

You hear that love is irrational all the time, yet you still hear the same people saying that love is enough to keep two people together.

Unfortunately, we live in a world governed by rationality, and while love may be irrational, and we may manage to make it work for some time, the real world always catches up with us and our irrational illusions dissipate into thin air."

Read full article--> 

http://elitedaily.com/dating/sex/means-love-someone-can-never/

[icardigan-blog]

DR3AM J0URNAL 2

November 22

A MURDER.

My alarm clock went off and heard my roommate making noise in the kitchen. Needless to say, I was happy to get out of that dream. I have memories of Henry from Once Upon A Time being in the dream but I don’t remember how. 

[icardigan-blog]

DR3AM J0URNAL 1

BIGGIE SMALL & A FLOATING RV...

November 21

[icardigan-blog]

first element of the high ropes course today!! #intervarsity #fallconference #balancing #adventure #crazy

[icardigan-blog]

“Books are the quietest and most constant of friends; they are the most accessible and wisest of counselors, and the most patient of teachers.” Charles W. Eliot

[icardigan-blog]

Miley Cyrus: Bangerz

Damn.

                                I applaud her. When would you ever hear a woman artist coming from country and pop make such a bold move as to rap on her longest awaited album? Never. She's stepping out, big time. She knew exactly what she wanted to create because it was what felt good. Sure, could possibly be the drugs making her feel good... kidding, kidding, Fuck that shit, she's having fun and acting like any other 20 year old just on a different scale. Let alone, her voice is enchanting when she really sings her all. The solo pieces are the best on the album. The song that truly reeled me on the path to SMiley-ing was 'Do My Thang' track 11. 

She really is taking a huge leap with this album. Now, it's not as great as I expected, but hey, it's Molly.  oops, Miley*.

p.s. i'll now be releases a rap album thanks to someone's idol ^^^?^?^?^^^ like im hip hop hurray bitchezzzzzzz                            

b_rizzzay

[icardigan-blog]

Proud To Be A Sycamore!

[icardigan-blog]

i'd like to try this. I need to, rather. 

"I believe with all my heart, that if you treat the little things like they are the big things, the mundane like they are the miraculous, the tiny details like they are the big picture, your life will be infinitely better. Start slow and try it. Notice more. See more. Appreciate all. You will find out."

[icardigan-blog]

roomates

my roomate is awesome, bff since yurr 5. yall bitchez who doubted us.... now ya know, WE GOOD LIVIN LIKE MILLION-HAIRES, whaaa ride er die bitchezzz.....

is she kidding?

yes and no. 

mostly no.

yeeee guurrrr

[icardigan-blog]

somehow so peaceful. 

[icardigan-blog]

--> College

As college students, we all have our different stressors. Perhaps yours is how many hours of sleep you’re getting tonight, where the next party is, responsibilities from organizations, grades, social life, or quite possibly anything. For me, it’s grades. Some of you may be able to relate. My worry is not that I am going to fail. The problem is that for some reason I rely heavily on my grades as a reflection of myself. This is stupid. Don’t do this. I know that my self-worth has absolutely nothing to do with my grades. But in my head, if I don’t have straight A’s then I have this hardened feeling in my body… STRESS. For example, today I received a test back that I studied for A LOT…Constitutional Law. My professor decided she wasn't satisfied with any of our essays so we have to redo that portion. From the rest of the test I got a B. I know I should be happy about that. I am happy about that. But I cannot shake the annoyance I have; which makes me annoyed more. Ahh, alas I conclude- the never ending cycle of stress, college, annoyance- blehk. 

[icardigan-blog]

--> College

I'm starting a sub-blog here called "College". These blogs will be vastly geared towards college students and written from a college student perspective- me. 

 Let's Go Indiana State! #ISU #ROLLTREES #GOSTATE #alsohappenstobeHOMECOMINGWEEKthisweeklol

[icardigan-blog]

TRU

If you make no effort to talk to me, we probably won’t ever talk again.

[icardigan-blog]

Wazzzup.

It's time to get my thoughts on here. Gonna get this account going again. I'm probably gonna change the name to b_rizzzay -- sorry and much love to the soon-to-be retired 'icardigan'. 

[icardigan-blog]

great day, great people #showoffyourbestfriend #senioryear #takinastepback #throwbackthursday @cam_wow747 @yo_gabbagabbi @crmcwhirter (Taken with Instagram)

[icardigan-blog]

our first date 😍 #showoffyourbestfriend #throwbackthursday #tbt #firstdate @kaganbobagan (Taken with Instagram at butler university)