idiosyncratic-reveries-blog

[idiosyncratic-reveries-blog]

P.S.

Please do click on some of the pictures to see descriptions :)

xoxo

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“My kind of Love”

Everybody yearns for love,

Like the kind of love shown by God above.

A kind of love that is pure and forgiving,

A kind of love that is powerful and never-ending.

A kind of love that makes you sappy,

But a love that will never ever leave you lonely.

A kind of love that will bring you light,

After you have lost from a certain fight.

A kind of love that is not prideful,

and a kind of love that is not rude, leaving you resentful.

A kind of love that will accept who you really are,

Not ashamed of all your imperfections and your scars.

But you see, the greatest love of all,

Comes from deep in your heart and your soul.

For love, there should be truth and honesty,

So as to be able to fight challenges and obstacles together with unity.

I’m not looking and searching for a love that is perfect,

Because for me love is all about spending time with a person that is worth it.

Acceptance and respect is the key,

For the kind of love that I need.

Love is something that is easy to spell,  and easy to say but hard to define, and hard to prove. Love makes every individual sentimental no matter what range of age. I guess that is why love is so powerful. Love can make one happy and joyful and at the same time can make one sad and resentful. Love should not be taken for granted as love is something that cannot be bought nor can be taken.

xoxo

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“The Emotion Challenge”

It is a must that one must know how to manage their emotions because if they do not then it may lead to possible breakdowns and to a level of inappropriateness.

Emotion, as defined by the online Merriam-Webster dictionary,  is a conscious mental reaction (as anger or fear) subjectively experienced as strong feeling usually directed toward a specific object and typically accompanied by physiological and behavioral changes in the body.

Our emotions ,significantly, are developed, affected or caused by the environment (internal and external), our cognitive; which consists of the past lessons that we learned and our experiences, and eventually our response or our reaction to such factors. These things then further develop the way we apply our personal methods of managing our emotions. Emotional management takes a lot of effort and discipline, as managing our own emotions can be hard and sometimes tricky. One must know the importance of balance; considering himself and considering others. Another reason as to why it is important to manage emotions is so that we can reduce the intensity of our emotions, which if we don’t it can cause one to think irrationally.

Hence, these are ways to manage emotions;

Keep Emotions in Check - this is important so as we will not be carried away with whatever emotion we are feeling. Being carried away with our emotions may cause us to do things we may regret. We can keep our emotions in check by taking time to think before we react and speak. 

Take a moment to consider your feelings - sometimes it is okay to express your emotions but make sure you are expressing it in the right time and right place. Studies have shown that people who repress and bury their emotions deep in their body, end up having serious illnesses.  Try talking it out with trusted members of your family and even your closest friend.

Control your anger - Yes, it is true that we cannot really change nor control our emotions, but we can still know how to live peacefully with them. Controlling our anger means to try and keep our anger away for even just a short period of time, just to avoid destruction or regrets. Sometimes, senseless and irrational decisions and thoughts are caused by overflowing anger. Anger makes everything worst.

Keep a positive attitude - Keeping a positive attitude is hard, I know. But it doesn’t hurt to try. Always try to look at things on the positive side. Be happy because like what they say “life is so short to live it with so much sorrow and regrets.” Having a positive attitude will bring about happiness and optimism in life. One can then handle situations more easily and without too much worry.

xoxo

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Create a personal bubble to bust off your stress!

Stress, according to Dr. Hans Selye, is the body’s reaction to perceived threat or tensions that affect the balance or homeostasis of our body.

As a developing person, stress is an event that is inevitable to me. It is something that cannot be avoided easily. I, personally, get so stressed out even the littlest of things. Though, yes we may learn from those “stressful situations” but it is something I do not enjoy experiencing. Stress for me is like a heavy load placed on my shoulders, slowly bringing me down to my breaking point. The worst thing about stress is that it wears you down and changes you emotionally and physically. Stress doesn’t only affect you but also your relationship with others. As in my case, when I’m stressed, I’m get irritated and annoyed very easily. I become blank and practically don’t care about anything else other than the state/ condition I am in. But, I do believe that stress is part of the development of a person. As an individual is able to use their capabilities, likes and strengths to fight off stress. 

My drawing, above, shows my personal bubble or my ways to bust off stress instead of stress bringing down. This personal bubble of mine helps me fight off the heavy load of stress. It contains my likes and what I do to avoid stress.

Have a personal interest - Find an interest that may relieve your stress. For me my top stress reliever activities are listening to music. dancing and playing volleyball. Doing those activities diverts my attention to somethings else and makes me happy.

Relax and stay calm - Rather than letting your stress win you over, fight it and simply stay calm. Remember that every problem has a solution. Don’t panic over a problem as you will just make it worse that it already is.

Sleep- Sleep is important as it allows you to rest and recover. Sleeping will give you energy to fight off stress and to think clearly.

Eat - I don’t fully recommend stress eating but sometimes it does work. But if you do stress eating, make sure you know your limits and don’t do it too often. Avoid eating too much nasty foods, rather eat healthy foods. Eating will also give you the energy you need!

Pets - Having pets is amazing, if you didn’t know. Pets are stress relievers for me. I have a dozen of them at home, and I’m glad that I have them. Something about playing with them and cuddling them, enables me to be at ease and to stay calm. My pets are my happy pills.

Talk to someone - It is important to always talk to someone. Someone that you know you could trust of course. In my case when I get stressed out, I always talk to my mom. She always gives me the best solutions. It is important to unburden your feelings and emotions because if you do, that heavy weight that you feel will surely be lessened.

Pray - Whether you are stressed or not, it is always important to pray. Pray for guidance and strength. Having a solid relationship with God, will give you more power, strength and motivation to fight off your stress. Praying for guidance will help you do the right thing as well.

“Stress is not what happens to you, but it is how you react to it” - Dr. Hans Selye

xoxo

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The important thing about studying is learning and gaining knowledge.

Being a student-athlete can be hard at times. Balancing academics and sports can take too much effort. You need to maintain your grades in academics and skills in your desired sport. But the most important thing is that you must know what to prioritize and for me that is my academics. My academics mean a lot to me because if I don’t maintain it well, there is a huge possibility of me not being able to play anymore or be a part of a team and my future won’t be so stable. Studying takes a lot of discipline, especially avoiding distractions. But if one really wants to achieve something, then they must faithfully commit to being motivated in studying well and hard.Studying may need loads of effort and time but it is worth all effort and time.

To be able to show effectiveness in studying, one can observe and use some tips and different approaches to further improve study habits. Thus, here are my ways to improve my study habits.

xoxo

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Dear Ate Ky,

Hi, my name is Yan. I’m someone, I guess you can describe as a perfectionist and a pessimist. Quite negative words right? But I believe these are the words that best describes me. I’m a type of person that really pushes what she wants and goes for it. But the thing is, I feel like something is hindering me from doing what I used to do or be.

These past few days, I have been looking down upon myself. Questioning my skills and abilities, even to the point of questioning my existence. Having a positive outlook of life didn’t even at one point crossed my mind. My vulnerabilities are getting the best of me. I get insecure so easily and I get so stressed out even with the smallest of things. I believe my negativity comes from overthinking too much. You see when I overthink, I tend to make my problems ten times worst that it already was. I can’t help it, I do try to stop it but I always fail at the end. Overthinking has become my mental drug. But not the kind of drug the gets someone high, but rather pulls someone down to their lowest point. Overthinking wears me down to the point of not being in a good mood or being happy. 

Overthinking has always been a huge problem of mine. There were times that overthinking led me to experience depression. Sometimes I end up crying myself to sleep or simply isolating myself from others. Overthinking led me to experience a different world. This “different world” is a kind of world that I don’t want to live nor exist in. The more I try, the more I fail.

The thing about overthinking is that it not only affects me but also those surrounding me. When I’m overthinking too much, I’m not in my best condition. I cannot think clearly and focus well as my mind is set to only a specific and single thing. Because of such, obviously my relationship with other people is also greatly affected. There was even one time that I got into an argument with my mom, just because I didn’t want to talk and overthinking leads me to being and getting irritated easily.

Thus, I ‘m writing you this letter in high hopes that you may possibly help me change and give me advices on what I can do to lessen this problem from occurring. Thank you.

-Yan

Dearest Yan,

       Overthinking is quite a normal thing to do BUT not to the point that you almost do it every single day. Overthinking, I believe, is not something that can be cured with medication but can only be cured with a proper mindset. It may take time to fully allow yourself to free yourself from that deep hole you’re in but I promise you it will be worth it. Remember that happiness is not measured by money nor achievements we make but rather is measured upon how one grows, experiences and gains unforgettable moments from it. Don’t push yourself too hard. Always remember that everyone has their own limits and breaking point, you have yours too. Stressing or overthinking will not change anything, become a person of action. Rather than stressing about a thing, DO something about it. Life is not easily alright? Pain and failures are just evidences that you tried and you are learning and experiencing. Don’t use those things as something to bring you down but rather as something to lift you up. Learn from your mistakes and grow from it. 

        Distract yourself, divert your attention into something else. You’re young, there are still so many things in life that you have yet to experience. Keep yourself in the positive side, you can do this by surrounding yourself with good and positive people. Choose your friends, wisely. If you have a problem don’t dwell on it too much, and most importantly don’t keep it to yourself. Try to unburden it by talking to your friends that you trust. Remember that you are never alone. Always stay calm and never do things that you will regret. Lastly, always and I mean always pray to God. Ask for Divine grace and help. 

Keep your feet on the ground, faith in God and your head held up high.

xoxo, Ate Ky 

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“The Genogram”

A genogram (pronounced: jen-uh-gram) is a graphic representation of a family tree that displays detailed data on relationships among individuals. It goes beyond a traditional family tree by allowing the user to analyze hereditary patterns and psychological factors that punctuate relationships. (http://www.genopro.com/genogram/)

This genogram basically represents my family and our relationship with each other. My family is, I guess you can say or consider, huge and this genogram doesn’t even show the whole members or context of my family. On my father’s side, his family consists of six members, whereas on my mother’s side, her family consists of eight members. Even though “my” family only consists of four members ( well disregarding the many dogs we have), I do have a lot of cousins. Most of the members as well already have their own family.

My family doesn’t actually live closely but rather we live rather a great distance apart. Most of the members in my father’s side live in Cebu while others live in Manila,while most of the members in my mother’s side live in Davao. But considering the fact that there is a great distance between us and them, we still manage to maintain a stable and wholesome relationship. Our family basically show the essence of what a family is as islands may separate us, still we communicate with one another.

xxbasansuicoxx

xoxo

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How to be an Effective Leader or Follower?

A leader must be someone who can not only lead but also server, and a follower on the other hand must also know how to lead and as well as serve the other people.

1. Be Respectful - Respect begets respect. When there is respect, everything else follows. One example of being respectful is that, like in the video, when you are being talked to never ignore nor never walk away from the person without excusing yourself or saying something. Just like how a leader should be, a leader must be someone who is approachable and knows how to entertain, properly, other people.

2. Communicate or Listen to other’s idea - A great leader/ follower knows how to accept feedback from other people. Someone who is open to the suggestions and ideas of others. A leader must give recognition that a certain person is a member thus must give recognition and importance to any ideas that they have. Communication is the road to better understanding.

3. Be Sensitive - Know your limits as a leader/ follower. Be sensitive in a way that you know your actions and words won’t hurt anyone nor degrade them or bring them down. Being sensitive may include, like in the video, not abusing the capabilities of others and letting them do too much work all by themselves.

4. Collaborate/ Help each other - A great leader knows how to help others and do work together with them. A leader must not just be someone who gives out orders and commands now and then.

5. Encourage Creativity - Simply, a leader should not be someone who brings down a person rather than lifting them up to  their fullest potential. A leader knows how to motivate and encourage them to do things with the best that they can.

 xoxo

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“To thyself, from myself”

Hi ky!

I just want to say that I’m very proud of you. You have been doing such a great job in facing your problems and in holding on. Stop overthinking ky! If you failed in some point, use that mistake to do better next time. Don’t get so down and worried! Ky, please continue achieving for the best and dreaming big. You are your own you! Remember that you are uniquely different and being such is so much more beautiful, so stop being so insecure. Life is so short to fill it with regrets and worries so live life with an edge among the others and live life like it’s the last. Yes, the future might be scary but you can do it! I believe in you! I really really do believe in you! Always remember that you have great friends, great parents, a great brother and a great God that will always have your back. Keep your feet on the ground. Keep your faith and your determination roaring! BE WHO YOU WANT TO BE AND FULFILL YOUR HEART’S PASSIONS! You matter more than those judgmental words. Words can’t define who you really are, so let them talk.  Ky, be that strong, independent woman that you’ve always longed for. If you were able to surpass challenges before, why can’t you now? Prove them wrong ky, prove them wrong.

Love, Kyla

“Learn to look “up” to yourself rather than to keep on looking “down” to yourself. You’re the only one who can motivate and inspire yourself. Looking down at yourself will do you no good.”

You don’t need money to find happiness, sometimes simple things like having friends can make you the happiest and can make you find life more meaningful. Surround yourself with good people and everything will work out well.  

xoxo Kyla

PS. Click images to make it more readable and clearer

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Personal Development and Career Goals

(PS. Please be aware that I’m no artist of some sort, I tried)

To be able to see the beauty of life, you must look at the other side. And to get to the other side, you must face the challenges ahead and let go of your fears.

In my 16 years of existence, I believe I have done great achievements in my life. Not only was I able to conquer a lot of my problems and a lot of challenges, I was able to achieve some of my goals. Being able to compete outside of La Salle Academy and as well as representing the name of my school, is a great achievement for me. Who would’ve known that the girl from grade school who was shy and afraid to talk to other people would get to where she is now. I was even able to join the varsity team for Volleyball and that as well is an achievement for me. During our Moving Up Ceremony, I was able to achieve my biggest dream and goal since I was in 7th grade, and that was to be the batch’s first honor awardee. But for me the biggest achievement of mine is the fact that I was able to hold on and keep my faith in our Lord no matter what challenges I faced. I was able to surpass the challenges that wavers my faith and was able to keep on believing in Him.

It took a lot of sweat and determination to keep on going. But I believe the people who surrounded me, helped me pass those challenges. But my list of dreams doesn’t end there yet. I will willingly and responsibly surpass many more challenges, if that’s all it takes to reach my dreams. 

As of now, I have a lot of responsibilities to do and maintain. Being a student-athlete is never an easy thing as time management plays an important role. I have to maintain my performance not only in school but in the team as well. Not only do I have the responsibility of being a student-athlete, I also have the responsibility of being a friend, sister, daughter and believer of God. I need to make sure that I know what to prioritize and make time for. I need to put more effort in everything that I do, not only for the benefit of myself, but for the benefit of those people that surround me as well. I need to focus and concentrate on doing my work and do everything with all my best and capabilities. I don’t regret having those responsibilities. Yes, it may be hard to balance each and may put some load on my shoulders, but those are the things that makes my life more meaningful and worthy to continue living for.

My one and only goal in my life is to be a successful person. Being successful isn’t only measured by the number of awards you have and the amount of money you have gained, but to be successful also means finding what the real meaning of life is, experiencing hardships and being able to surpass them, being able to find yourself in the process of doing so, and being able to benefit the common good. In the career dimension, I want to be a Chemical Engineer someday. Being a Chemical Engineer enables me to be more useful in the society. It helps me to be something instead of being nothing. Personality-wise, I want to be able to know myself more. I believe the process of achieving the list of goals I have can help me find and know myself more as it allows me to know what my strengths and weaknesses are, what my capabilities are and what my interests are. In the process of achieving those goals, I want to be able to maintain my relationship with my friends, family, and with God. 

There is still a long journey ahead of me, but I believe that everything is possible and attainable. With the people that surrounds me, I know that I always have a shoulder to lean and cry on and I know there will always be arms to hug and comfort me. Life is scary, you don’t what awaits you but if you put your trust and faith in Jesus and do your best in everything, there will be no need to worry. 

“No man walks in the same river twice”. We don’t experience the same things over and over again. If you fail in some aspect,  try again because this time you can correct the mistake you did before and you’ll never know maybe this time you will succeed. To be able to see the beauty of life, you really need to look at the other side. Transcend beyond what is expected and do things differently. To get to the other side, you must willing face challenges as those are the stepping stones towards your success. 

xoxo Kyla

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A Personal Mandala

“We are all a little bit something more”

“Mandala, a generic term for any diagram, chart or geometric pattern that represents the cosmos metaphysically or symbolically; a microcosm of the universe.”

We are more than just our faces, we are more than just our physical appearances. What creates our identity is really our personalities. Humans, as we are, we uphold so many personalities; shallow or deep, visible or invisible, shown or hidden, and fake or real. The personality ,likewise the characteristics and attitude, we show vary and depends on who we interact and engage with. Some people might experience our lighter sides, and some, well, may experience our darker sides. We have varying personalities, personalities that may have been developed over time due to development(growth), experiences and even due to socialization with other people or personalities that a person is already born with, naturally. The kind of personality we show may also depend on how we feel, emotions play a major role in our lives as it can deeply affect our performances and even interaction itself. 

Steven Aitchison believes that, “ Inside each and every one of us lies multiple personalities. Not in a ‘dissociative order’ kind of way, rather different personalities in different areas of our lives, and each of these areas have different characteristics, in effect multiple personalities.”

I’m a type of person who upholds multiple personalities, but not in the disorder type or way though. My personality varies depending on the other person I’m interacting to and also depends on my emotions or feelings as well. If I’m interacting with an acquaintance or with a stranger, I only show a single part of my personality. Call me fake, thought I don’t know why you can call me fake because I’m still showing a part of who I am, but this is my way of guarding my “self-wall”. I can only show who the real me is if I have known that certain person for a very long time and if I’m comfortable with him/her. Some people might even come into contact with my darker or bad side, not that I want to, it’s just that there are some people who think they are just too good for others and they think highly of themselves. Tiredness and restlessness can also cause me to get irritated easily, whereas if I’m in a great mood I love to interact with people more.

Just like how multiple colors of dripping paint mixes together in the end, once you get to know me better and I as well get to know you better. You’ll get to experience what my real personality is, what the real me is like and how different my identity is from what you perceive of me based on your judgments. You’ll get to experience what the real me is behind and without those cover-ups. That is why you need to know a certain person first before judging them because what if they are just showing a single part of their personality? It may sound scary how if you know me better, you get to experience the real me better. But trust me, the real me is far from scary. 

Humans might be the reflection of the world, but this mandala is the reflection of me. 

Til next time,

xoxo, Kyla.

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“Dear Self”

Dear Kyla,

Um hi, this is quite awkward writing a letter to myself but I think this is great to be able to express my/your feelings more and to have something to look back to in the future if you need help again in terms of reality check.

For the past few days,you have been so stressed out, like real bad. There is never a day wherein your mind is completely blank of worries and problems. Expectations are wearing you down. It kind of feels like expectations cause you to hate yourself even more. Though those expectations might have been pushing you past your limits, still you never stop trying. You fear being judged, that’s why you try to shape yourself to what they expect of you. They tell you to do this and that, making it quite impossible to actually make decisions for yourself.

You feel like there is a blanket that is wrapped around you, but not in a comforting way. It’s as if something is covering up what the real you is all about. It’s as if something is suffocating you and suffocates you even more if you fail to follow what they want and expects of you. You feel like a puppet being controlled with what other people wants you to do. This is what you feel amidst the dozen expectations that you carry on your shoulders. It’s funny to think that as young as you are now, your life is so problematic and you carry a heavy burden of stress and pressure.

Some people expect too much from you. Thinking just because you were able to do this and achieve that, you are able to do anything and everything without any errors, mistakes and without any problem. When in reality, you’re just like any ordinary kid waiting and hoping for their dreams to come true. Some people just tend to forget that life’s not easy and you’re not made out of steel. They forget how you are also  human and tend to push you past your breaking point. They act like they know you but in reality, they never will. All those expectations have pushed your real and true self to the deepest and farthest core or part of your identity.

But you know what? Why don’t you break those chains that binds you and keeps you away from your happiness. You’re the only who knows yourself better. You have the power and capacity to makes choices despite of the various influences that may coerce your decisions and beliefs. Why don’t you just let it go. If they won’t like the real you, then fine. You were not born to please everybody, you were to please yourself and make your own happiness.

xoxo Kyla

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“The Selfie Project”

Carpe Diem.

Taking all the chances and making the most out of everything as possible.

I’m that kind of girl that gives off a negative impression to other people. Most first impressions I get is that I’m “maldita” and snob or let’s say I have the aura of a mean and bratty person. I just don’t get how your physical appearance can immediately determine your identity and how people may think of you. To be honest, I’m far from being a mean and bratty person, it may depend on how you treat me I guess, but most of the time I’m someone you can approach easily despite of how I look.

26th of August 1999, an exciting and memorable day for my parents and my brother, well mostly to my parents. In this day, a girl with a unique personality, abilities, skills and interests came to take a glimpse of the wonderful creations of our dear God and to experience life as well. She was originally from Manila a.k.a “Pearl of the Orient”. This girl’s name was Lianne Kyla “Suico” Basan.

From my 16 years of existence, I learned and experienced a lot. I dealt with broken friendships, mistrust, and loads and loads of stress and problems. I have experienced the so called “roller coaster” of life. But to be honest, I’m thankful for those challenges as it helped me shape and find out who I truly am.

Writing blogs is not my forte but I’m willingly to accept challenges and learn. I have a huge interest on indie music, sports, dancing, and playing musical instruments like the guitar. I like having pets as well. Since I was in 3rd grade, I was a student-athlete (varsity member of the Volleyball team) and since I was a grade school student, I have engaged myself to dance clubs. I guess, I can say that I’m good with time management, as I’m still able to maintain good grades despite being active in certain curricular activities. I’m also good at achieving things that I really long to achieve. If I want it, I work hard for it. There are some traits that I have that I actually really hate. I hate how I’m such a perfectionist and how of a pessimist I am. I over think a lot as well. These negative traits are what constitutes my mind 24/7 thus leading me to insecurity and low self-esteem. I despite people who makes fun of other people. 

Despite those things, I’m ready to conquer the different challenges to be thrown at me. I will put all worries and fears aside and go for “it”. Nothing can ever stop me from making the best out of everything and achieving my goals.There are times that I may feel that I’ve had enough, I will still continue to work hard. I will always be ready to seize the day.  

From now, this is all what I can say. As I’m still growing and developing and currently is a walking pilgrim on a journey towards completeness and wholeness.

Until next time.

Kyla signing off, xoxo