incoherentlynonexistent-blog - Tumblr blog

[incoherentlynonexistent-blog]

I wish you'd say something....

Not anything....

But at least that you care or you hope we cross paths again......

I wish you'd say something so I wasnt feeling like this constantly.....

Can't you say anything to make me feel better....

About anything.....

I'm literally bummed out because the lack of response.....

Did I really mean nothing to you

Is this really how things have to be......

Why did you do this to me....

@radbakon

[incoherentlynonexistent-blog]

I'm beginning to see how life works...

It's nothing like its portrayed in movies

It's not even remotely close to the books you read

Life isn't high school all the time

You may have been successful then

But being in the real world

You're unknown

You're unsuccessful

Nothing is garunteed

Not everything you work for is granted

Sometimes you just get left behind

And plenty of times you'll be left unanswered

All I see is working hard to live

And hardly living to work

I'm hardly living at all

So many negative thoughts

With a bad past

It's led me to believe this world is a horrible place

Not everybody will stay

Not everybody means well

Nobody is perfect

You Can't have the perfect life

The people who do you wrong will live life without punishment

Sometimes you're just destined to not have a Damn thing

Often you find yourself wishing for something

I wish I could be loved and wanted by someone....

This world has taught me...

That nobody loves anybody any more

This world is cold and dead

Perhaps that's my traumatic past speaking fir itself...

Not everybody has a bad life....

Even when you do right

Despite you being a good person

You're sentenced to a life of misery and pain...

I've yet to learn if anything will and can change.....

I'd hope so

This world has taught me to only become cold as the dark depths of empty space that surrounds it......

This world has taught me nothing but to fear death....

I know nothing but to wait for it because it's like that's all there's left for me to do....

This world has taught me that it's not really worth living in....

Why even bother when you get knocked down after a certain distance....

I don't know of anything more than failure.....

I fail to understand how my life has become this

I fail to have any hope that I'm meant for anything better....

I feel as if I'm just fighting a losing battle....

I know nothing of what I want

This world has taught me nothing but constant denial....

I refuse to try in fear of being rejected....

I've learned doesn't matter how hard I try

If I'm someone not as worthy as someine else....

Despite how much more I'm qualified and promising of a person

I'm screwed either way

"Nice guys finish last"

"If you ain't first, you're last"

The world has taught me that movies literally relate more to life than you think though

Talledega nights has it right....

I'm not in first

I'm in dead last

Heading toward the same finish line as we all are

Death....

I'm trying to be ok with being last

It means I'm taking my time

I'm enjoying every moment i have on this earth...

Even though I'm not wanted

I have yet to belong anywhere

I'm soaking in the last few miles that I still have....

I know we die in the end

I fear of dying alone

I fear of not having a life with anybody other than my family....

I understand life means more than that....

I'm just tired of always being by myself....

I'm tired of losing people....

Damn it

If this world has taught me anything positive

It's that every one is in your life for a reason

And I'm only living hoping to God I soon see why

I hope that soon everything falls back into place

Especially when it was falling apart so long ago

How far I've come

I see the brighter side

It's not completely over

But I do see a good change soon

I hope I'm right

I hope to God whatever it is

I hope its meant to stay

Ill do whatever it takes to make it so

I mean I'll do anything

If it prevents me from being alone

If it keeps me from getting suicidally depressed....

Than God please let it be...

Let this one be true

I feel like giving up

But this world has taught me that you have to see the brighter side of things

In order to get the big picture

Unfortunetly some things aren't always that easy

I'm not long from what I feel were my darkest days.....

I've never felt so much pain as I did then

Now it's still a recovering effort....

This world has taught me

That not all wounds heal at a fast pace...

Not all heart break kill you

But it leaves you close to it

I have my days

I beg for death

Because idk what else to do

I hate how things happen....

But once they've changed.....

It's a whole different ball game....

And I'm losing at that once again....

Go me....

Pretty much playing for pride...

When I die....

Even though it'll be alone

Atleast ill die proud to have left something that ill always will be remembered by

[incoherentlynonexistent-blog]

Thinking Back....

I convince myself that you never cared...

Recalling all the times before

You let me go so easily

You lied to me on a daily basis

You hid things from me

You expect me to not be angry

You'd hope that eventually I'd come around

With how heartless and deceitful you were

Ill be damned if ill ever get over it

I doubt ill ever give you the understanding you desire

You want me to get better

You're a fucking idiot

That will never happen

Not with the amount you escalated

Not when you led me on again and again....

How can you think that ill just forget about you easily

How can you sit there and think of me in such negative ways

How could you not have ever been honest with me

Why didnt you just speak the truth to begin with

Instead of it being something new every time you explained yourself

That gives me the reason to believe you're fake as your promises were

You were never going to be serious with me

Because like you said

You're always kidding

Only when you say im being serious

Is the time to really take you seriously

And on that note

I guess that means you weren't ever serious from the start

You liked to make me think that way so you can feel better about yourself

You don't want me around because ive yet to get over the traumatic past you've put me through

Of course who wants that reminder

Not when the things you have now...

Weren't ever the things you had before when I was around

Perhaps you think I was the one holding you back

When clearly you're doing it alone

Youre in a pattern

A constant off and on relationship

So how is that my problem

How can you rid me away in fear of losing something you've done lost continuously more than you've actually lost me...

The only difference between mine and her in betweens is the time we spent apart

As if I ever treated you to deserve such demeanor

I lost everything since you've come along...

Despite the things I lost

I found you worth it though

Because I figured it was going to last for some time

Maybe not forever

But to the point what I had lost was worth it...

What I gave up to let you back in time and time again

You don't find me as worthy

You never did

While you're reading this smirking

Probably annoyed and aggravated

Or perhaps emotional

As if id ever fucking know

You and I both know what and how things really took place

We both know youre in the wrong for how you're going about this

Not to mention your reasoning

Either way I know Damn well you could be better and at least clean up the mess you made

Thinking back I recall you doing so very little

Why am I expecting so much from you now

When you never really tried for me before

You never stuck by my side

Before I became this angry hurtful person

I was so nice to you especially....

I used to be so patient....

Damn to think I once wanted to give you the world....

And when you think back to how you destroyed it....

I hate how I've become who you were those few years ago....

Except I don't have that ex that is as forgivable or even caring....

I don't have an ex whom is willing to take me back despite the stupid choices I made....

I don't have an ex that even has feelings for me anymore......

Thinking back....

I wish we never met....

I wish I never got involved....

I wish I never fell in love ...

I wish I never knew who you were....

Thinking back......

I can say with great sadness

You weren't worth it.......

You still aren't...

But hey look at me now...

I'm writing a post

That you're currently reading.....

It's still not affecting you any

Maybe there's no feeling left to feel

Thinking back you used to be so emotional

How I actually prefer that

Over this silent treatment

Even if it was nothing but lies and broken promises

Atleast I had a response....

Thinking back we've changed entirely.

But there's that part of us that's always going to remain

I hate that you won't even pick up the phone to see how I'm doing

I would text or message to see how you're holding up

But thinking back to all those times before

God forbid I get blocked again or no response at all

Just get left on read

Yet another thing

I'd never do to you especially thinking back

To those nights you calling me in secret

It pisses me off how you just played with my head so bad

And you've gotten away with it

You don't have to answer to me

You can't technically.

Your relationship prevents it

You would lose the same person that you've lost week in week out, month after month, just consistently since the beginning Of Your relationship

So you do win overall

I get to be the obsessive one

Im the needy controlling angry druggy that you can't and no longer have a need for

There's nothing for me in your life now

I didn't realize things changed that much

I never knew I wasn't good enough to stay in your life....

It hurts like fuck that it's been four fucking years total...

Why are you still reading this and not feeling something by now....

Seriosuly compare who you are to now and do the same with me

Think of how you really drastically changed it worse than what it should've been.....why can't you just really think for a second and reason to which why I've become the way that I am now......

There's another lost battle to fight....

Thinking back.....

I remember you telling me your memory sucks.....

At that point....

I think I'm done....

Its pointless when that's the answer on if you ever wondered how I've become so fucked up....

I swear on my life....

Nothing and no one has ever gotten me so fucked up as you have.....not meth....not cocaine.....not weed.....not acid.....not ecstasy.....not Xanax.....not anything......nothing and I mean not a fucking thing compares to withdrawels from someone you truly love.....I hate being angry.....I really do.....I jump down everybody's throats just for the simplest things....I'm really at lost for words on how ive become such a horrible person......Jesus I wished you'd understand that because of how you went about things.....in taking the anger and hurt I feel for you on everybody else....I mean ive become a monster.....how can you let me have become this way......its not your place now....but thinking back.....why couldn't you stuck around or make me a first choice for once in your life....even as a friend.....

Idk it just be nice if you did the major things for me as I have for you.....

It would have been an easier road to travel if you would have been open and honest

If you hadnt lied to me constantly....

If you didn't hurt me...

Idk what else to say or do to convince you to really change what you're doing ...idk what is even left to fix or if there's anything at all, but I would hope for someone who cared, I had hope that I was worth at least give it your all to someone who's lost it all for you in the first place...I don't want what you have fuck no.....I just want the time that I gave you...its all I ever wanted honestly.....not a relationship not asking for anything other than a few minutes out your day every other day or so just to chat.....you never gave it your all before.....thinking back.....idk what makes me think you'd even consider it now....

Glad to humor you....

Glad you could have a laugh before bed....

Its whatever....

Nevermind for asking

Just forget about it....

Like you've done me as well.....

Last one and I'm done...

Choice is yours from here on out....

Obviosuly the answer will be clear in the future....

I just hope that you at least understand where I'm coming from and realize the reasons why ive become this horrible.....

I'm sorry I can't be better....

I'm sorry you can't be around to really help me heal

I'm sorry I'm not worth you losing your relationship....

Idk I'm sorry for everything...

Seriosuly I apologize endlessly for who I've become

I'm not fond of her either....

She's rather fucking annoying

And I'm having a time refraining from punching her in the face

Seriosuly she's pissing me off

Can't stand the bitch

Idk why you ever dated her 😪😒😐

The fuck were you thinking

@radbakon

[incoherentlynonexistent-blog]

Me: Dad, am I adopted?

Dad: No, why would I pick you?

submitted by /u/Shore20 [link] [comments]

[incoherentlynonexistent-blog]

Teacher: I’m your son’s teacher and I’m calling to tell you that he may be a compulsive liar.

Woman: And a damn good one. I don’t have any sons.

submitted by /u/bjs1023113 [link] [comments]

[incoherentlynonexistent-blog]

Why is girlfriend one word but best friend is two words?

Because your best friend gives you space when you need it.

submitted by /u/i_didnot_sayit [link] [comments]

[incoherentlynonexistent-blog]

How can you

Live with yourself when knowing Damn well you've made such a difference in my life that things will never be the same for me....how can you live with that?.....how do you live with yourself when I can't change for the better?.......

You ruined my life.....

Idk what else to do

Idk what else to say

How can you let me feel this way....

Why did you leave me so vulnerable....

How can you not do anything about it.....

Why do you not care if I get better or not....

I'm better off in a body bag

Because im dead already....

I doubt there's anymore you could do to break my heart

You've done enough already

You wont even help me recover

You just disappeared

How do you expect for me to just get better?

How can you live like nothing ever happened

Why did you do this to me of all people....

To the point I'm no better than you now

You ruined who I used to be

How can you be ok with that

How do you easily live without me

What did I do to deserve this....

Am I that bad of a person.....

Did I really do that badly...

Shes done worse....

I guess I'm just pathetic and a waste of space....

How can you be ok with making me feel so worthless

Thanks so much

This traumatic event has me fucked up for life

Its thanks to you no doubt

How can you not do anything about it

How can you be ok with me being like this....

I want to hate you so badly.....

How can you not come around anymore.....

Why have you left me this way....

Can't you do anything to help me.

How can you sit there and read my posts

But never do a thing about it....

How can you let me suffer....

How can you be so Damn heartless.....

Fuck man......

This is bullshit

I hate this empty feeling

Its one that you'll never understand truly

Because you've never been low as I am

You have no idea

You cant even be a good person for once

How can you refuse to help me when you're the one who's messed me up in the first place....

How do you keep living everyday as if nothing ever happened

How can you make me feel this way and be ok with it....

How can you just rid me like yesterdays trash....

How can you just forget about me

How can you just suddenly not want me any more..

How can you consistently let me down....

I just wanted you around

I wanted you to have patience....

How can you expect me to get better

When nothing that you've done helps me

Instead in more fucked up than what you originally did

I'm messed up to the point I doubt ill ever heal

How can you leave me so broken

How can you just not answer my questions

They're not that hard

It's just a pondering heartbreaking thought

How can you leave me to think like this....

If you're waiting for me to get better magically

Its not going to happen....

How can you not know that the damage youve inflicted

How could you not know that it fucked me up more than what you think it did....

How can you be ok with me never being the same...

How do you expect me to heal and move on

I cant get over the things you've brought in my life

How can you keep on like this

Did I really fuck up to the point this is my punishment....

How can you sentence me to a life of suffering

How can you not see that I wont get better....

How can you just sit there silently

How can you just be ok when I'm crying myself to sleep nightly....

How could you do this to me.....

How could you leave me so broken and feeling worthless

What did I do

Why did you treat me how you did

How can you still treat me the same

When I always treated you right....

How can you be so horrible toward me.

Why did I get fucked over....

How can you think that ill eventually recover...

Obviously its not happening

In still in the same spot you left me in

I'm sorry I actually loved you more than she does

I'm sorry that you cant see that

How could you have not seen it by now

How can you not want better for yourself

How can you do anything....

How can you live when knowing you left me for dead pretty much....

Hoe can you not see that I will love and care for you more than she ever will.....

How can you just act as if I wasnt at one point someone important.....

How can you just shut me out like this....

Im sorry I fell for you in the first place...

Maybe its my fault for falling for somebody that doesn't exist.....

How can you not have done something for my benefit by now.....

What will it take to have you in my life....

How can you not want to be here....

Am I that bad of a person.....

Ill never know...

Ill never know where I went wrong....

Ill never know anything

Ill never get over this...

Ill never get better....

How can you still think that....

How can you be ok with me becoming the result of your actions

How can you not do something

How can you think time will make things right

How can you just read this and not do a god Damn thing about it.....

Wtf dude....

Fuck you for this shit....

Ill be thankful for when I can finally fucking hate you....

How can you be ok with that...

How can you willingly let something go that's more promising than what you have now....

How can you go about this like you've been doing...

Am I not worth atleast helping to get better

How can you expect me to do that on my own....

Especially when this is all ive ever known....

It doesnt help me....

How can you believe that...

How can you fuck me up so badly....

I won't get better....

Its no thanks to you.....

Thanks for nothing

Thanks for leaving me traumatized....

Thanks for fucking my life up to no ending

How can you think ill get better when I lack the motivation to even get on with me life

God Damn you how can you have been ok with this for so fucking long

God Damn it when will you see that I womt get better on my own....

Why can't you get that through your head

How can you not tell that what you did has fucked me up beyond repair

How can you just not do a god Damn thing about it....

How do you live with yourself.....

@radbakon

[incoherentlynonexistent-blog]

Worst state of mind

Is when I tell myself over and over

Especially after breaking down at the thought of you

I try convincing myself that I fucking hate you

The worst part is when I contradict myself

Fuck I want to hate you for what you put me through

I wish I could mean how badly I hated who you've become

It goes with great sadness

That I admit to only loving you more

Because from my side

It looks as if you have life going....

More so than me definently......

Its why I feel worthless

I'm sure losing me wasn't as heartbreaking....

It Doesn't matter to you how my thoughts go

You don't care to even come around any more....

I don't know what I want to feel

I'm literally torn between broken and angry

To suicidally depressed

I'm sad every day no doubt....

I'm down about myself

Because even when I treated you the best

I still get the worst in return

All the things you have done and are still doing

I wouldnt have even thought of doing the same to you

Even after the fact of everything

I hold that still in my heart

Because its not like you were remorseful

Its not like you tried to make a difference

You've been ok with me being like this for three years now

I can't even hate you for that

I want to though

I wish I fucking could

You haven't made anything better

Not that you can't

Its the matter of you not wanting to

As if that helps the situation

Like that helps me forgive you

If anything I just find more and more faults

With every day that has passed

And for everyday that is to come

Until you actually approach me

Tell me how remorseful you really are to my face

Not behind a phone screen like a coward

But like a decent human being.....

Unless you're still butt hurt over things ive said

Like you haven't and if you're still not doing worse

Words do hurt

But have you ever believed in someone so much

That for everyday they're not there

Its like someone's ripping your chest apart...

It's the mental and physical pain

Added with the emotional side

You can say how badly it hurt

But nothing compares to what you did

You have the ability to make it go away

But you choose not to

As if that isn't going to make me more frustrated

Because I'm constantly respecting yours and everyone else's wishes

But ill be damned if mine can ever be granted

God forbid can I actually be happy for once

The ability to stay that way for more than a few minutes

With that being said

Its another reason to be mad with you

Its another reason why I should hate your guts

The difference between mine and your actions

Mine hasn't fucked you up to the point you are reluctant to live without me....

Your daily routine wasnt nor ever will be tainted because of one persons broken promises

I mean even if what I said and the way I acted is the reason being

Than you really are ignorant and a hypocrite

Bad enough you're a heartless person

At Least that's what it seems

You wouldn't even bother to try for me any more....

Within the past two years

You've never gone out your way to really be here

If I acted out of line

You shunned me out and abruptly ended the only friendship I had....

Ive still yet to make any more friends....

Ive yet to belong anywhere.....

Maybe that's what it is with you

Perhaps you were the first person to let me in

You made me feel important

And it was because of how you appreciatively acknowledged the fact I treated you the best...

So for once in my life, I felt like the hero

I actually felt successful....

Losing you was as if I were stripped of all my powers

I feel like I can't do anything right

Its the way you looked at me

You looked at me like nobody ever has

That's where I fucked up.....

I mistakened that acknowledgement and praise

I guess I thought that was love

When clearly it was lust

Because she's moved on in life

Leaving me in the dust

Of all things and reasoning

Why did you leave me so fucked up

How can you make me feel like that and then make it just disappear.....

It's literally like watching liquid being sucked by a vacuum

Shoommmm

Gone....

And im the one still looking foolish

She's left me in the worst state of mind.....

How could I have been so fucking stupid......

She never would have fallen for me

God thinking all that time

This is to good to be true....

And I was right.....

Because its gone....

Just like she is too.....

@radbakon

[incoherentlynonexistent-blog]

Pretty much already has...

—   GOOD MORNING, SUNSHINE.

(insp.) all credit for this quote goes to birbs!

Mad World Tag List: @jennifer-reneeoc

Tag Forever: @perfectlystiles

[incoherentlynonexistent-blog]

I never wanted to believe that my dad was stealing from his job as a road worker

But when I got home all the signs were there.

submitted by /u/DiMethylHg [link] [comments]

[incoherentlynonexistent-blog]

What's brown and rhymes with snoop?

Dr. Dre

submitted by /u/killsforsporks [link] [comments]

[incoherentlynonexistent-blog]

Worst state of mind

Is when I tell myself over and over

Especially after breaking down at the thought of you

I try convincing myself that I fucking hate you

The worst part is when I contradict myself

Fuck I want to hate you for what you put me through

I wish I could mean how badly I hated who you've become

It goes with great sadness

That I admit to only loving you more

Because from my side

It looks as if you have life going....

More so than me definently......

Its why I feel worthless

I'm sure losing me wasn't as heartbreaking....

It Doesn't matter to you how my thoughts go

You don't care to even come around any more....

I don't know what I want to feel

I'm literally torn between broken and angry

To suicidally depressed

I'm sad every day no doubt....

I'm down about myself

Because even when I treated you the best

I still get the worst in return

All the things you have done and are still doing

I wouldnt have even thought of doing the same to you

Even after the fact of everything

I hold that still in my heart

Because its not like you were remorseful

Its not like you tried to make a difference

You've been ok with me being like this for three years now

I can't even hate you for that

I want to though

I wish I fucking could

You haven't made anything better

Not that you can't

Its the matter of you not wanting to

As if that helps the situation

Like that helps me forgive you

If anything I just find more and more faults

With every day that has passed

And for everyday that is to come

Until you actually approach me

Tell me how remorseful you really are to my face

Not behind a phone screen like a coward

But like a decent human being.....

Unless you're still butt hurt over things ive said

Like you haven't and if you're still not doing worse

Words do hurt

But have you ever believed in someone so much

That for everyday they're not there

Its like someone's ripping your chest apart...

It's the mental and physical pain

Added with the emotional side

You can say how badly it hurt

But nothing compares to what you did

You have the ability to make it go away

But you choose not to

As if that isn't going to make me more frustrated

Because I'm constantly respecting yours and everyone else's wishes

But ill be damned if mine can ever be granted

God forbid can I actually be happy for once

The ability to stay that way for more than a few minutes

With that being said

Its another reason to be mad with you

Its another reason why I should hate your guts

The difference between mine and your actions

Mine hasn't fucked you up to the point you are reluctant to live without me....

Your daily routine wasnt nor ever will be tainted because of one persons broken promises

I mean even if what I said and the way I acted is the reason being

Than you really are ignorant and a hypocrite

Bad enough you're a heartless person

At Least that's what it seems

You wouldn't even bother to try for me any more....

Within the past two years

You've never gone out your way to really be here

If I acted out of line

You shunned me out and abruptly ended the only friendship I had....

Ive still yet to make any more friends....

Ive yet to belong anywhere.....

Maybe that's what it is with you

Perhaps you were the first person to let me in

You made me feel important

And it was because of how you appreciatively acknowledged the fact I treated you the best...

So for once in my life, I felt like the hero

I actually felt successful....

Losing you was as if I were stripped of all my powers

I feel like I can't do anything right

Its the way you looked at me

You looked at me like nobody ever has

That's where I fucked up.....

I mistakened that acknowledgement and praise

I guess I thought that was love

When clearly it was lust

Because she's moved on in life

Leaving me in the dust

Of all things and reasoning

Why did you leave me so fucked up

How can you make me feel like that and then make it just disappear.....

It's literally like watching liquid being sucked by a vacuum

Shoommmm

Gone....

And im the one still looking foolish

She's left me in the worst state of mind.....

How could I have been so fucking stupid......

She never would have fallen for me

God thinking all that time

This is to good to be true....

And I was right.....

Because its gone....

Just like she is too.....

@radbakon

[incoherentlynonexistent-blog]

Reluctant

I can't bring myself to even want to

I don't want to see you

I refrain from looking in your direction

I refuse to take notice

I don't care to catch your eye

I know Damn well you saw me

It's easier to look away

Than to glance right at you

Despite you were riding beside our car

Even though Tripp was staring you down

I still couldn't do the same

I can't look at you now

I dont care to ever see you again for that matter

It hurts to even hear your name

It killed my day to see you actually

My day has been just off since earlier

I hate what you did to me

I hate this power you still fucking have

Doesn't matter

Wherever you are

Whatever you do

You're past faults have ruined who I am today

I can't do anything without the thought of you affecting me daily....

The damage you've done still affects me

You won't ever understand

You won't care either

You've done to much damage for me to pretend you dont exist

Its unfortunate you couldn't see that

It's aggravating how you were inconsiderate

Its rather hurtful to see how you don't care

If you were trying to get my attention

Or trying to get me to look in your direction

I'm sorry I cant bring myself to

I'm reluctant to ever stare at you again....

I just can't....

Its all ruined.....

I don't have to look at you to know you don't see me the same.....

I can't bring myself to look at you because of that reminder.....

I don't want to look ar you and be reminded that we have nothing to say apparently.....

I don't want to be overly happy for seeing you for a mere second....

I don't want to hurt any more....

But it's still just as painful as it was the first time you left

I'm reluctant to remember anything else....

Only because this was the biggest impact in my life

Its led me to this road I'm going down now....

I'm reluctant to believe you ever cared....

Its because of this right here.

How it probably didnt phase you one bit....

For me, it ruined the rest of my day...

i didnt even stay the night at Jeremy's.....

I came home....

Because little did you know

It literally breaks me apart inside

It kills me to see you .

For it not to do the same for you though

For it not to move You to hit up my phone

It makes me reluctant to believe you ever cared about me.....

Or that you ever had feelings.....

I'm reluctant to believe anything and everything you've ever said.....

Only because you aren't affected the way I am over this

It won't ever bother you with anything you put me through....

It doesnt matter that it ruined my day or my life

To you, it's something ill just get over

You just don't know me at all

You never did

You sure as hell never will

I hate that you did this

I can't stand you for the amount of time you let passed

I'm reluctant to believe you didn't do this on purpose

Nobody does this much damage to someone

And leave them so fucked up and broken

Then live life as if nothing ever happened

You don't know nor will you ever know how I feel

I want to hate you so deeply

But I fucking can't

If its not the hardest thing to stop loving the person that wasn't meant for you

Especially when you thought they were different

Its hard to actually live on as if you didn't change at all.....

Maybe this is my karma for believing in you

Maybe this is what I get for trying to be different.....

It sucks either way

Everything dealing with you ruins my day....

Everyday pretty much

Even when I don't hear from you .

God Damn you really fucked me up

What was the point?

I'm reluctant to believe you didn't mean to

Because last I checked

You never showed one smidget of remorse

Not to my face any way....

Its whatever

Enjoy your fucked up way of living

Just keep living life as if you never knew me

That really makes everything better

As if you just haven't done enough already....

[incoherentlynonexistent-blog]

What do you call an apology written in dots and dashes?

Re-morse code.

submitted by /u/WaxyCoronet4212 [link] [comments]

[incoherentlynonexistent-blog]

Tragically Torn

When I recall what we used to be

I think of the abrupt ending

I think of how we drifted apart

I hate how we tragically separated

I'm so broken and torn

I'm weak and empty handed

I've been casted out

Ive been ridiculed

Ive been made to look like a fool

I've endured things I never thought I'd go through

Ive lost myself

I've become someone better

However part of me is still missing

Despite how it's felt with anyone else

I'm forever scarred by these tragic events

I'm fucked up mentally beyond repaired

I hope the person responsible feels pleased with themselves

Maybe one day theyll have someone

That can give her more than I could

Maybe someday she'll actually be loved

To where she can finally love herself

She could treat people right

It's heartbreaking to not be included

Never again....

Only because I'm part of a past wanting to be forgotten

Doesn't matter what and how much I gave

It doesnt matter still that I loved her over everything else

It doesn't get the time back

All my efforts were wasted....

For something that never mattered

It still doesn't....

It Never will

I'll only be that ex

The one that was tragically changed

Because of something that tore me apart

It was because I put all my faith into someone unstable

Now that she's stable enough

She's unwilling for me to lean on her

It was ok when she needed me most

Because she didn't need me any more

She's left me in the dust

Our friendship was abruptly ended

And she's left me once again

Tragically torn and broken.....

No signs of remission

This is a life experience that's going to forever haunt me....

Its what you get for loving someone that only made you think you had a chance

Making you feel different

But still wanted

For them now to just be gone with not even a goodbye

If that doesn't kill your self worth

You question how can someone be so heartless

How can you leave someones life that you've impacted greatly

How can you leave knowing what they feel for you is much more sincere than what youre with Now

How can you keep waiting for someone who doesn't care how tragically torn you are over them

That someone is only interested and looking out for herself

Doesnt matter what she did before

It doesnt affect her current standing

So why in the fuck does it bother mine

Because I'm tragically broken and torn on the fact I was once promised and other times led on

So you think I'm fucked up now

Or maybe I have been

However you're not bothering to make jt better

You're not redeeming yourself.

You've yet to be around long enough to do such a thing

God forbid can you actually go back and fix things

The fact you tragically scarred my life.

With the trust issues and constant doubt

I'm to broken and torn to be fixed right?....

I'm just another piece of trash in your garbage can

One you threw away because I'm so tragically broken and unstable, that there's no help for me. It's not a problem throwing something old away especially when you have new to replace it with......why does it matter if I'm tragically torn anyway.....I've been thrown away and just rid of......

Because this is for the best.....

Yea thanks to you in more fucked up than you are. Congrats I bet you did that so you could feel better about how fucked up of a person you really are. I'm worse than you so it makes you look better and more selfless and full of emotion. In sure you have a good time talking shit on my name. Its thanks to you That I'm fucked up like this....

[incoherentlynonexistent-blog]

[incoherentlynonexistent-blog]

Silently Suffering

Everyday I'm on auto pilot

It's like being dead inside

I'm aware of my surroundings

I'm engaged in conversation

But reflecting back

I can't remember what was discussed.....

Hard to recall anything I've talked about

I just know one thing

When I'm asked what's wrong

I'm unable to tell them

It's like idk if I know myself

I know what it really is....

I'm unsure why I'm affected like this

I wish I could be more coherent

I wish I weren't so damn unhappy

It's not so easy to just change things

It's nearly impossible to stop loving somebody

It's the worst pain to feel unwanted and abandoned in a way

For things to go from one way to all of a sudden nothing at all...

Its hard to really involve yourself in your own life....

Its hard to accept the fact of everything I once had is gone...

To feel the same empty nights end on the same routine...

Home by 7pm

Earlier on the weekends

To feel your life changed 360°

Would be satisfying

If anything you did were worth it

But standing on this side

It wasn't

I can't bring back time

I wish I could

I'd change something

Because now I'm just trying to figure out where I went wrong

I'm trying to move on...

I'm unsure how I got this far....

I'm silently suffering

I'm only playing the part

Pretending to be happy

Pretending to have moved on with my life

When I'm really stuck

I can't be sure what to do now....

I'm silently suffering...

I just want a way out.....