ineffablemuffins

[ineffablemuffins]

Why do I keep forgetting there’s a text box for reposts instead of putting everything in the tags 💔😔

first proper post !!! and its about tanz der vampire ofc something i find very interesting about Ivan Ozhogin's Krolock is how he looks at Herbert during Tanzsaal, both before and after the bite you cant really see it well in most bootlegs, but i found this post on pinterest where you actually can see it. the second he looks up at Hebert you can clearly see the disdain/disgust on his face i interpret this as being two possible things: either its the thought of taking yet another life for his own gain that upsets him, Herbert being a reminder of that or, Krolock uses the bite as a strange sort of punishment?? like Herbert's own vampirism bothers him so much, that Krolock sees it as a way to remind him of what's wrong with him i know i sound crazy, however !!!!! theres this video of Rostislav Kolpakov as Herbert during Tanzsaal, where he's either just fighting his thirst, OR he feels guilty/ashamed that he wants to bite Sarah as well tldr; Ivanlock is evil and mean and all his Herberts suffer the consequences

[ineffablemuffins]

Viscount Sparkling Berry Cookie? Maybe???

Cookie Herbert loves strawberry jam 😋 especially from unsuspecting vampire hunters 😋

[ineffablemuffins]

Lets Come Up With New Ideas For Herbert and The Count's Relationship

One of my favorite more underrated things about tanz der vampire fics is the variety of ways that people will portray Herbert and Krolocks family-dynamic. However, when I talk about variety I mostly mean that in an emotional sense, yknow, sometimes its genuinely sweet and good, sometimes its a little abusive, sometimes its extremely abusive, sometimes its a little strained and distant but with a lot of effection there still, sometimes its got an inexplicable splash of incestous feelings in there, ive truly seen it all. However, to my great dismay, most people seem to just kinda take it for granted that herbert is krolocks biological son that he had when he was human and then turned into vampire as an adult, either in an uncontrolled way when krolock was first turned and just kinda bit whatever was alive in his vicinity or in a controlled way where Herbert knew what was goin on and (usually) consented. I think, given the fact that we dont actually know in what way theyre father and son and how they became that way, we as a community could stand to be a little more creative about this, so I have compiled this list of ideas for unique shit you could do with herbert and krolocks relationship. Please do feel free to add your own ideas

Anyway, lets begin

Krolock adopts Herbert... as a baby

Ive seen atleast a few fics where Krolock is an old-as-balls vampire who ends up taking a teenage/young adult Herbert under his wing before turning him at an appropriate age and I think thats a fun concept already, but I think the baby-adoption is an untapped fic-market personally. Ive though about this a lot, and while I do not ever want kids (partially bc pregnancy sounds like a nightmare partially bc idk how to deal with kids) in this life, I think if I was immortal and I had already been around for 200, 300 years I would totally adopt a baby and try to raise it just to see what its like. So I think Count von Krolock should that, he can either graciously adopt an orphan or steal a beloved child out of someones home if he feels like being fucked up about it

Krolock adopts Herbert... as a vampire

So like, Herbert gets turned by some vampire and that guy either dies or gets killed or just abandons him bc he sucks, immediately after turning him, so now Herbert is just roaming around, a deeply confused creature with a deep lust for blood, and Krolock stumbles upon him and takes him in. I think this would go well with a more abusive dynamic, a sense of "i took you in, I can easily cast you out" maybe, although something loving and sweet would also for sure work

Herbert is a half-vampire

Herbert is Krolocks biological son that he had while being a vampire with a living woman, so hes a half-vampire. You can more or less decide what a half-vampire is for yourself, but I like to imagine them as these deeply physically fucked up guys with just. the most health-issues. They need both blood and normal food to sustain themselves but either one may unexpectedly cause them to throw up, that kinda shit. Also I imagine them as having normal human lifespans, so you could probably do something interesting with his human mom as well if youre not killing her off

Lovers to Friends to Father-and-Son

I guess this one is the one thats in accordance with that theory that I dont really like about Herbert being that pageboy of napoleon huh. whatever. So Herbert and Krolock meet as two unrelated guys, they strike up a romantic and/or sexual relationship, then Herbert moves into the castle and after a while of living together their relationship just kinda recalibrates and now its familial. Because idk, I feel like theres so much media about a type of love turning into another - mostly platonic love turning into romantic love 😔 but theres some other stuff too I think - but its never romantic love turning familal and I think thats a missed opportunity. Like, relationships can shift a lot over a human lifespan and these bozos live way longer than humans, I do not see a reason for why it couldnt shift from a romantic thing to a wholesome father-son-thing. And yknow, inbetween theyre like friends or some other non-lover thing to make that less weird. But if you wanna make it more weird, just skip it, no need for a gradual development, they full on fucking one moment and disgusted by the very notion of it the next, who cares

Herbert's the abusive one

I was just reading over my post and realized that when I talk about their relationship being abusive sometimes, I specifically mean Krolock being abusive towards Herbert, partially bc of the typical parent-child power dynamics but also because thats what I always so. Idk, you could subvert that if you wanted to. I dont really have an idea for this one beyond that

Herbert is the father

Herbert had Krolock when he was really young and then got turned into a vampire, so hes like perpetually 20 while his son grows up normalstyle until hes like 50. Maybe Herbert abandons him to avoid drawing suspicion bc hes not aging but then Krolock takes an interest in the occult (as he often does in fanfics) and finds out about vampires and he remembers some of his fathers little eccentricities and hes like "motherfucker" and tracks him down. Or you just do the typical herbert-krolock dynamic where its the vampire father with a lot of self-restraint waiting until his human son, who knows all about the vampire-stuff, gives him explicit permission except he does it when hes like 50 instead of late teen/early twenties

Heres an idea thats technically about Herberts mom and has very little do with Krolock but I feel like it fits here:

Herbert's Mother Commits Suicide As a Vampire

So, Herberts mom is out of the picture in pretty much all fanfics and theres generally one of two reasons given: 1) she died in childbirth and 2) she slowly died of illness while herbert was a child. What I think would be interesting is if she was turned alongside Herbert and Krolock (or just alongside Krolock if hes doing the turning for both of them) and then they kindof play Vampire House for a bit, but after a few years she simply cannot take murdering any more people and commits suicide out of guilt. Because a lot of the authors of fanfics where she matters to some extent always want to make her super pure and stuff, so heres a way you could still do that but a bit more unique

Although I do also like the idea of her being alive as well, I think theres a lot of untapped potential there

Actually that reminds me, I have one more idea

Herbert's Mother is a Vampire and Alive But She Sucks

This is based on a german fanfic I read where she just kinda barges in and is annoying. Shes not living in the castle as she and Krolock appear to be as divorced as you can possibly be but she does still like to visit sometimes, and Herbert doesnt particularly like her, he just finds her bothersome and kindof embarassing and I just love that, I need more of that energy for the elusive ms von krolock

[ineffablemuffins]

Oooo I love these!!! I think about Krolock and Herbert’s dynamic a lot, and usually different sets of actors get different backstory ideas for me so I have some to add that you or others might find interesting!!

Human sacrifice Herbert

Similar to the Krolock adopts a baby one, Krolock finds a basket with a baby at the castle gates as a sacrifice from the village to protect them. Krolock, who really doesn’t want to eat a baby, ends up raising Herbert because he’d feel bad leaving the poor thing with parents who clearly wouldn’t take good care of him.

Pageboy but like Different

For some reason Herbert is always French when I think about this (he doesn’t actually have to be the pageboy but it’s what made sense I guess lol), but this is a very Resident Evil 8 inspired thing where, instead of the usual looking-for-lost-lover vampire trope, Krolock tries to “recreate” his dead son. Part of this is experimenting on other humans, who then become the Ewigkeit vampires because they weren’t good enough replacements.

I think I originally thought of this listening to Die Your Daughter by Susannah Joffe, where Herbert would find something like an old diary from when he was alive, signed with his actual name (before Krolock convinced him he was Herbert von Krolock), and realizing his actual family would be long dead because it’s taken him too long to figure out why his memories of his childhood are so foggy.

Maybe I’m getting a bit too specific but generally it aligns with the romantic turned familial dynamic, but instead Krolock has the intention to seduce then bite then turn into a horrible replacement of his son, rather than a natural shift in their relationship (I like evil Krolock can you tell)

Lets Come Up With New Ideas For Herbert and The Count's Relationship

One of my favorite more underrated things about tanz der vampire fics is the variety of ways that people will portray Herbert and Krolocks family-dynamic. However, when I talk about variety I mostly mean that in an emotional sense, yknow, sometimes its genuinely sweet and good, sometimes its a little abusive, sometimes its extremely abusive, sometimes its a little strained and distant but with a lot of effection there still, sometimes its got an inexplicable splash of incestous feelings in there, ive truly seen it all. However, to my great dismay, most people seem to just kinda take it for granted that herbert is krolocks biological son that he had when he was human and then turned into vampire as an adult, either in an uncontrolled way when krolock was first turned and just kinda bit whatever was alive in his vicinity or in a controlled way where Herbert knew what was goin on and (usually) consented. I think, given the fact that we dont actually know in what way theyre father and son and how they became that way, we as a community could stand to be a little more creative about this, so I have compiled this list of ideas for unique shit you could do with herbert and krolocks relationship. Please do feel free to add your own ideas

Anyway, lets begin

Krolock adopts Herbert... as a baby

Ive seen atleast a few fics where Krolock is an old-as-balls vampire who ends up taking a teenage/young adult Herbert under his wing before turning him at an appropriate age and I think thats a fun concept already, but I think the baby-adoption is an untapped fic-market personally. Ive though about this a lot, and while I do not ever want kids (partially bc pregnancy sounds like a nightmare partially bc idk how to deal with kids) in this life, I think if I was immortal and I had already been around for 200, 300 years I would totally adopt a baby and try to raise it just to see what its like. So I think Count von Krolock should that, he can either graciously adopt an orphan or steal a beloved child out of someones home if he feels like being fucked up about it

Krolock adopts Herbert... as a vampire

So like, Herbert gets turned by some vampire and that guy either dies or gets killed or just abandons him bc he sucks, immediately after turning him, so now Herbert is just roaming around, a deeply confused creature with a deep lust for blood, and Krolock stumbles upon him and takes him in. I think this would go well with a more abusive dynamic, a sense of "i took you in, I can easily cast you out" maybe, although something loving and sweet would also for sure work

Herbert is a half-vampire

Herbert is Krolocks biological son that he had while being a vampire with a living woman, so hes a half-vampire. You can more or less decide what a half-vampire is for yourself, but I like to imagine them as these deeply physically fucked up guys with just. the most health-issues. They need both blood and normal food to sustain themselves but either one may unexpectedly cause them to throw up, that kinda shit. Also I imagine them as having normal human lifespans, so you could probably do something interesting with his human mom as well if youre not killing her off

Lovers to Friends to Father-and-Son

I guess this one is the one thats in accordance with that theory that I dont really like about Herbert being that pageboy of napoleon huh. whatever. So Herbert and Krolock meet as two unrelated guys, they strike up a romantic and/or sexual relationship, then Herbert moves into the castle and after a while of living together their relationship just kinda recalibrates and now its familial. Because idk, I feel like theres so much media about a type of love turning into another - mostly platonic love turning into romantic love 😔 but theres some other stuff too I think - but its never romantic love turning familal and I think thats a missed opportunity. Like, relationships can shift a lot over a human lifespan and these bozos live way longer than humans, I do not see a reason for why it couldnt shift from a romantic thing to a wholesome father-son-thing. And yknow, inbetween theyre like friends or some other non-lover thing to make that less weird. But if you wanna make it more weird, just skip it, no need for a gradual development, they full on fucking one moment and disgusted by the very notion of it the next, who cares

Herbert's the abusive one

I was just reading over my post and realized that when I talk about their relationship being abusive sometimes, I specifically mean Krolock being abusive towards Herbert, partially bc of the typical parent-child power dynamics but also because thats what I always so. Idk, you could subvert that if you wanted to. I dont really have an idea for this one beyond that

Herbert is the father

Herbert had Krolock when he was really young and then got turned into a vampire, so hes like perpetually 20 while his son grows up normalstyle until hes like 50. Maybe Herbert abandons him to avoid drawing suspicion bc hes not aging but then Krolock takes an interest in the occult (as he often does in fanfics) and finds out about vampires and he remembers some of his fathers little eccentricities and hes like "motherfucker" and tracks him down. Or you just do the typical herbert-krolock dynamic where its the vampire father with a lot of self-restraint waiting until his human son, who knows all about the vampire-stuff, gives him explicit permission except he does it when hes like 50 instead of late teen/early twenties

Heres an idea thats technically about Herberts mom and has very little do with Krolock but I feel like it fits here:

Herbert's Mother Commits Suicide As a Vampire

So, Herberts mom is out of the picture in pretty much all fanfics and theres generally one of two reasons given: 1) she died in childbirth and 2) she slowly died of illness while herbert was a child. What I think would be interesting is if she was turned alongside Herbert and Krolock (or just alongside Krolock if hes doing the turning for both of them) and then they kindof play Vampire House for a bit, but after a few years she simply cannot take murdering any more people and commits suicide out of guilt. Because a lot of the authors of fanfics where she matters to some extent always want to make her super pure and stuff, so heres a way you could still do that but a bit more unique

Although I do also like the idea of her being alive as well, I think theres a lot of untapped potential there

Actually that reminds me, I have one more idea

Herbert's Mother is a Vampire and Alive But She Sucks

This is based on a german fanfic I read where she just kinda barges in and is annoying. Shes not living in the castle as she and Krolock appear to be as divorced as you can possibly be but she does still like to visit sometimes, and Herbert doesnt particularly like her, he just finds her bothersome and kindof embarassing and I just love that, I need more of that energy for the elusive ms von krolock

[ineffablemuffins]

I GIF'd the exact moment that caused me to lose my Mcfucking marbles. It's his eyes. My husband heard me say something, uh, suggestive because I made this on call while I watched crochet.

[ineffablemuffins]

I FORGOT HE KISSES HER HAND AFTER. HELLO.

Hi. Big positive rant incoming, bear with me.

*Ahem!*

Holy mother of God, I didn't think it was possible for me to love Steve Barton's Krolock more than I did but god damn. And Cornelia Zenz is spectacular as well. She really makes me believe she is in love with him. There's so much going on here that is is making me lose my marbles. First of all, these two have amazing chemistry. I am partial to shipping Sarah and Krolock because of them. The body language. The eye contact. Speaking of eye contact...

Yeah, that way he's looking at her from the top of the stairs around 2:28 and onwards until he comes down the stairs, is some intense stuff. If my scene partner was looking at me like that, there is a very high chance I could not hold eye contact for maybe a second, before my knees decide to just give way.

He's so focused on her. Like there's nothing else that matters at this moment but her. Like time has stopped and it's just them. The way he sings his verses, I think he believes that she is the one. The one that can love him, despite what he is. And she knows very well what he is, considering how she bares her neck to him. She wants to be what he is.

I've seen a few interpretations of Krolock on YT, where they lean into "he's only manipulating her, so he can have her blood" but I'm not really getting that vibe here. I don't know if 'earnest' is the word I'm looking for, but Krolock looks some kind of way here, how he looks up constantly. I think it's hope he's feeling. I don't want to say there's a nervousness about him, but it's almost like at some points, he doesn't want to touch her or let her touch him, because he fears potentially losing control and harming her. I don't think it's a one sided infatuation. The way Sarah looks at him at 4:47 is amazing. She has fallen for him and it shows.

AND HOLY SHIT THE WAY HE BELTS AT 5:05, 5:16, AND 5:33. WHAT A FUCKING UNIT.

His voice is so gentle during the closing section. Almost tender. Like he truly cares about her and holds himself back for her sake.

Also, someone in the ensemble sounds so pretty during the "sei bereit, sternkind" bits and I really like that person's voice.

Mmk, silly little rant over, I adore this cast and acting choices!

[ineffablemuffins]

Usually krolah isn’t my taste but this video paired with your descriptions is really good!!

One of my fav Tanz moments is in this recording of Steve Barton & Bettina Oswald (I think), where Sarah holds Krolock’s close to her as he’s biting her (which I’m Extremely Normal about of course) and she holds his face after, right before they walk back to the center of the stage (3:26 & 4:24).

I think about this image a normal amount

Hi. Big positive rant incoming, bear with me.

*Ahem!*

Holy mother of God, I didn't think it was possible for me to love Steve Barton's Krolock more than I did but god damn. And Cornelia Zenz is spectacular as well. She really makes me believe she is in love with him. There's so much going on here that is is making me lose my marbles. First of all, these two have amazing chemistry. I am partial to shipping Sarah and Krolock because of them. The body language. The eye contact. Speaking of eye contact...

Yeah, that way he's looking at her from the top of the stairs around 2:28 and onwards until he comes down the stairs, is some intense stuff. If my scene partner was looking at me like that, there is a very high chance I could not hold eye contact for maybe a second, before my knees decide to just give way.

He's so focused on her. Like there's nothing else that matters at this moment but her. Like time has stopped and it's just them. The way he sings his verses, I think he believes that she is the one. The one that can love him, despite what he is. And she knows very well what he is, considering how she bares her neck to him. She wants to be what he is.

I've seen a few interpretations of Krolock on YT, where they lean into "he's only manipulating her, so he can have her blood" but I'm not really getting that vibe here. I don't know if 'earnest' is the word I'm looking for, but Krolock looks some kind of way here, how he looks up constantly. I think it's hope he's feeling. I don't want to say there's a nervousness about him, but it's almost like at some points, he doesn't want to touch her or let her touch him, because he fears potentially losing control and harming her. I don't think it's a one sided infatuation. The way Sarah looks at him at 4:47 is amazing. She has fallen for him and it shows.

AND HOLY SHIT THE WAY HE BELTS AT 5:05, 5:16, AND 5:33. WHAT A FUCKING UNIT.

His voice is so gentle during the closing section. Almost tender. Like he truly cares about her and holds himself back for her sake.

Also, someone in the ensemble sounds so pretty during the "sei bereit, sternkind" bits and I really like that person's voice.

Mmk, silly little rant over, I adore this cast and acting choices!

[ineffablemuffins]

Thoughts on the two(!) Japanese Krolocks now that I’ve seen them both! 💕

Because I know this is going to reach people who don’t know me (but if you like Tanz, by all means get to know me!), I want to start with a disclaimer that I’ve never really been into Japanese “oshi” culture. I “grew up” as a baby fan with a more Western musical theatre background, so rather than seeing everything a specific actor is in, I’m one of those annoying people who wants to see all the understudies and alternates. When it comes to Tanz, I’m a fan of the show and of Jim Steinman above all. So I was mostly just excited to get TWO Krolocks (and two Professors, in addition to two Alfreds and… I sadly was not able to score a ticket to any show that had Nakamura Reino as Sarah, so I only saw one Sarah, but there WERE two!)

SO. Yamaguchi Yuichiro, the OG Japan Krolock, and until this week, the ONLY Krolock is ever seen live. I know I said I don’t stan specific actors, but I will admit that until recently, Yamaguchi being cast was definitely a mark in the “pro” column when deciding whether to see a show. He has a very distinctive voice that I think people kind of love or… maybe not hate, but don’t see what the big deal is. I’m definitely in the love column. Especially back in 2006, when he first played the role, his voice has this otherworldly quality that really suits the role of immortal sex god… I mean Krolock 😜

That said, in 2019 I was less impressed than I’ve been in the past. He also dropped out of Les Mis a few years ago after being announced as Valjean, and generally hasn’t been as active recently, so I wasn’t sure we’d ever see him as Krolock again… and even when he was announced, I wasn’t sure he’d be able to sing it. (No hate for the man AT ALL, he is 68 years old and has absolutely kept up his voice better than many actors his age!)

In the show I saw, he was very hit or miss. He can still belt out the lower parts, but his falsetto and anything that needed to be softer seemed to threaten to flicker out of existence, like the opening of Die Unstillbare Gier was whispered more than sung.

THAT SAID, I think most of the audience both night I went were fans, who knew the show and his history in it, and when he DID find his voice it was as brilliant as ever, so while I probably wouldn’t recommend that someone who’d never seen the show before and didn’t know who he was choose him as their first Krolock now, I was immensely grateful to see him for what I expect will be the last time (for me; he’s still playing two more nights in Tokyo, plus Nagoya, Osaka, and Fukuoka!)

I honestly wonder if he was lip syncing some parts… I don’t know. But his voice was about to give out during Die Unstillbare Gier and then was PERFECT during the ball, so. Again, I probably wouldn’t care if I found out it was, because for me it was very much about getting that one last time. I’m reminded of what I believe was the last time Meat Loaf did For Crying Out Loud live, he said something like, “you can either watch me and say he didn’t hit all the notes, or you can say he gave it his all.” He definitely gave it his all.

For the record, I didn’t really think either of the Krolocks had what I personally would call the “right” chemistry with Rina Frank as Sarah (although I generally liked her Sarah). For Yamaguchi, he just didn’t feel sensual… too much of an age difference, maybe, coupled with the fact that his vocal issues made him seem old and fragile in parts, rather than immortal and all-powerful, and I just didn’t really buy that she WANTED him, rather than simply respecting and fearing him.

Now, Yu Shirota. I have obviously seen his name and face around, but I don’t think I’d ever actually seen him live in anything before this. He is best known as Death in Elizabeth, but like my Sarah luck with Tanz, I’ve never been on a night he was on! I honestly wasn’t SUPER impressed by the TV spot a few months ago where he sang Die Unstillbare Gier, but I also know there’s a difference between singing one song in a TV studio and doing a whole show on stage with full sets and costumes. Plus, I’ve been feeling for awhile that it was time for Yamaguchi (as much as I love him) to pass the torch, or at least to share it with a new Krolock, so I was really looking forward to his take on the character.

Shirota also has a very distinctive style of singing, at least in parts. It sometimes sounded like he was biting off the words or kind of muffling his voice by not opening his mouth all the way, if that makes sense? And unlike Yamaguchi, he didn’t use a lot of falsetto. None of that is necessarily good or bad, just my take on his singing style. I’ve seen people online say they saw echoes of Death in his Krolock, and even though I haven’t seen his Death specifically I think I see what they mean.

To be completely honest, his hair bothered me. LOL If Yamaguchi felt too old, he felt too young to be Krolock, especially standing next to Herbert, who’s supposed to be his son but looks about ten years older… and I really think a lot of that came from his appearance rather than his performance. I don’t really love the long purple wig Yamaguchi’s been wearing the past three or so runs either, but that at least feels like an updated nod to the European productions. I don’t like Krolock with blond curls. Even so, I think it might have been OKAY if half his hair wasn’t hair spayed into essentially a Phantom of the Opera mask over half of his face, so you can’t see ANY of his facial expressions when he’s in profile on that side. (Phantom’s staging is designed with an AWARENESS of this, and strategically uses the half mask… Tanz is uh, not about facial disfigurement and therefore did not really benefit from that, IMO.)

Costuming aside, I did generally like him in the role and I do wonder if he might’ve had a different chemistry with Nakamura’s Sarah (Rina Frank plays a more mature Sarah, and that together with a younger Krolock made them feel more like a typical good-girl bad-guy couple than “ancient vampire seducing young virgin” or whatever.)

He is still fairly new to the role though, and I assume that in double casting Krolock this time they either plan to have him take over full time next time, or possibly continuing to double cast, bringing in someone’s to share the role with him next time. (I do not expect Yamaguchi to return to this particular show.) I think that both actual age and time in the role should continue to shape his portrayal, and I’m looking forward to seeing what he continues to do with it. (Please give him a wig next time, though!)

I’m not sure if this was new in 2019 or from the previous run, but they did still have the vampire dancer in the graveyard during Die Unstillbare Gier. I never really liked that (not the dancers themselves, but having someone else on the stage with Krolock), and sort of assumed it was because Yamaguchi was getting older and maybe couldn’t throw himself over the graves in despair or whatever like other Krolocks do. So I was curious to see if they kept that for Shirota. (Some of the singing parts had clearly been changed to accommodate Yamaguchi, but Shirota sang them in the original key/octave, so I wasn’t sure whether the staging would vary by actor too?)

They DID keep the vampire dancer, but it was done a little differently (the dancer was also a different person both nights though, so I’m not sure WHOSE differences they were). For Yamaguchi, it felt a little more like he was singing, and the dancer was acting out the scene. With Shirota, the dancer would kind of come behind him and act like his shadow, and then sort of break out and fo his own thing, kind of showing the “quiet part out loud” I guess?

I still don’t really love the dancer (again, not the dancers themselves, but having them onstage for that song). I want them to cast Krolocks who can physically act out the scene as necessary (although of course that can and should be adjusted to each actor’s strengths and ability). BUT I thought it did work a lot better when Krolock and his “shadow” sort of interacted with each other (without ever acknowledging the other’s presence), rather than just existing independently?

AAAAND that got a lot longer than I was expecting. Curious as to what anyone else thought… these were only the performances I went to so might not be representative of the entire run.

[ineffablemuffins]

Thought id dump my herbert doodles here...first post also 🖤 I really adore his fangs

[ineffablemuffins]

Volunteer!Reader x Ghost (The Band)

Pt. 2

Summary: reader actually meets people!! meeting with Sister and the ministry goes ok? ok enough

Warning!! really stupid google translate Italian because I will take italian speaking emeritus family to my grave (thank you popaganda series that lasted 2 episodes)

3160 words

The sun from the window hits your eyes, waking you up around 9 AM. Your nose and eyes are dry this morning after forgetting to turn on your humidifier last night, but hey at least you got to sleep in. Throwing off your covers, you stumble to the bathroom, not even bothering to turn on the light. You half heartedly brush your teeth while trying to regain sentience after a deep sleep last night.

Now slightly more awake, the walk back to your bed is better coordinated. Sitting back down you feel around for your phone. Unlocking it you see a few unimportant notifications, some friends updating their lives on social media, Maya texting a picture of her cuddled in Vivian's arms bidding you a goodnight that you were asleep for.

You clear all notifications before turning to your laptop. You had brought it in bed with you to binge some show then promptly knocking out, but now it seems a good time as any to check if ‘The Clergy’ responded to you at all. Booting it up, you close the tabs from whatever sleep deprived you thought to create up last night. Opening your college’s homepage, you hesitate to check your email. Originally you thought it would be an easy rejection, but something was actually making you nervous about that idea.

Shaking your head you just decide to face it and click your email. At first you see nothing, just a few spam emails with useless information about campus, until you scroll down a little bit and see a response about only 30 minutes after you sent in the initial email. You suck in a breath of anticipation, within the first few lines a member called Sister Imperator asks you to come in for an interview today. Wait… today? “Shit.” You scramble off the bed, rushing to your closet for suitable interview clothes. In the middle of hopping around, trying to put your pants on, you realize you don’t even know where to go. Leaving your pants half on you hunch back over your bed to look up their address.

Good thing the interview was at least an hour away, and while you don’t have a car, the public transportation is pretty good in this cit- wait… Looking up the place in your maps app you realize its in the middle of a fucking forest an hour away. Fuck but with the bus system its at least two hours. “Damnitdamnitsonofabitch-” You’re back to speed dressing, zipping up your pants and choosing a good button up shirt, you grab a jacket before stuffing your laptop in your bag and pulling on some boots.

You race out to the nearest bus stop, looking up the right bus number to get to the Clergy. Sitting down in the little terminal you bounce your leg in anxiety. Fuck you hope you make it in time. Looking at the map there’s still a bit of a trek to get there from the bus, but if you catch the right bus at the right time, the walk should be no problem. Sister Imperator said the interview was at 1, it’s about 10 now, so as long as the bus runs on schedule, you should get there around 12:30. Maybe even 12:40, but the walk looks like it takes less than 10 minutes so everything should be fine. You send off a quick confirmation to Sister Imperator just as the bus arrives. Swiping your pass you sit down next to a window in the back and settle in for a long ride.

Choosing a random playlist, you decide to look up some more information about this Clergy. Going back to the website you found their listing on, not much more information was given other than their want for a kind of intern. There was something about a ghost or whatever but maybe that's just spooky Satanist talk, either way the line that mentioned it was deleted at some point probably this morning. It didn’t scare you off anyways, it's not like you’ve ever encountered ghosts before, that you can recall at least, so it shouldn’t be a problem. All you can really find on them is that they’re Satanists and they started this whole thing sometime in the 60s.

They’re pretty obscure, you’re surprised you can find anything at all, there’s not even a picture of the place. Just an address that you’re choosing to trust, which isn’t the best idea now that you’re thinking about it… But hey it’ll be an interesting story if nothing else. For now you just close your eyes for the next hour and a half and listen to your music until your stop.

As the bus makes its twists and turns, the sun flashes across your face. Thankfully it was still early spring, so the weather outside was cooler in the morning until about 3pm ish. The walk through the forest shouldn’t leave you too warm and sweaty from the sun, not the best first impression for a job interview.

Almost 2 hours later you come up to the end of the last stop on this line. Some shabby little wooden terminal that looks like it hasn’t been maintained in years. You thank the driver on your way out and bring up your phone’s map to check which trail to follow. It looked simple enough, about a 10 minute walk through a nice looking forest wasn’t bad. Starting your trek up the path, you get the sense that someone’s watching you. You keep walking, but looking around you don’t see anyone else up here. It’s not an unpleasant feeling, not hostile but wary.

Every so often you think you imagine that the sunlight peeking through the tangle of leaves and branches are eyes peering down at you, watching you move through the barely recognizable gravel path. You turned off your music to be more aware of your surroundings, just in case, but nothing triggered any alarms in your head. Despite being in a dense, dark forest that most people would be cautious about going into, it felt welcoming.

The walk is actually pleasant, a nice breeze passes by every few seconds and the constant cloud cover offers a nice cool spring day. After a few minutes you notice a few spires peeking above the trees. The feeling of being watched passes as the building makes its presence known the closer you get. It’s exactly what you’d expect from a satanic church, classic gothic architecture with beautifully stained glass windows and gargoyles. Like actual fucking gargoyles on every corner. Who the fuck knew this place was all the way out here, and so huge too? It’s at least a couple stories high, and you can even see a few other buildings attached to it in the back.

Checking your phone you notice you’re 10 minutes early, exactly the way you predicted (re. Hoped, wished, and anxiously bit your nails about) it would go. Now that you’re at the steps of the church, you hesitate. Do you knock? Is there a doorbell? You debate your options while walking up, but before you can even raise your hand to the large ornate knocker, the door hinges squeak into movement. It opens to reveal a man wearing a maroon tracksuit and black shirt that says VVULGARI. His appearance slightly startles you. He has deep dark circles around his eyes, you can’t tell if it's makeup or just a really fucked up sleep scedule. And… is he wearing a singular white contect? No that looks too real, but how else could it be that color? Maybe it is makeup because his top lip is black too. You stare at each other for a few seconds, then he speaks, your hand still in the air for a moment.

“Ah… Hello.” He awkwardly waves in your general direction. “I am Pa- er Copia. I am Copia.” He extends his hand to shake yours briefly before gesturing for you to enter. “Sister Imperator asked me to meet you at the door. We eh… didn’t expect you to be early but it's better than being late no?”

“Yeah… uhh I didn’t realize how long it would take to get here this morning, especially on the bus. You guys are pretty remote out here huh.” You say, looking around the foyer. It feels a lot more home-y than you expected despite the cold stone walls. The red carpet gives a nice bounce to your step as you start to follow this Copia guy out of the foyer.

“The bus? It’s been awhile but there is a little station out there huh. I thought it was put out of service…” he continues muttering to himself as you walk through multiple doors. You pass a few people on your way to what you assume where Sister Imperator’s office is. Quite frankly you’re putting a lot of trust in these people you don’t know. You do seem to notice the people you pass are wearing nun habits and frocks, but sexy? Some are modest and almost pious looking, so they’re customizable to their own tastes, but almost every one of them has one accessory in common. An upside down cross rosary, but with what looks like a capital G in the middle.

They stare at you and whisper to each other as you pass. Was it because you’re dressed weird? Or maybe because they’ve just never seen you before. That’s a better thought than whatever the anxiety in your mind was trying to tell you. It seems fair enough, this place really is removed from the city, It would make sense that they don’t get many “outsiders” so to speak.

Amidst Copia’s mumbling he seemed to be startled by something. “Oh mio Satana- I never asked. You are the applicant for the intern position si?” Looking away from the “nuns” you nod. “Oh yeah- yes I am. I mean it would be kinda weird if I just followed you in.” You laugh nervously while you fiddle with the cuff of your sleeve.

“Good, good, yes…” He trails off, clapping his hands together and picking up the pace he had previously. “We’ve never had quite a job like this here, so this will be new for all of us. But Sister Imperator should know what to do.” Copia looks back occasionally to make sure you’re keeping up. “Uh huh, I mean I’ve heard of volunteering for Christian churches or whatever, but I didn’t know it was a thing for Satanic churches. I didn’t even know they had physical buildings, well at least to this scale.” You say, looking out the windows to what looks like a nicely sized greenhouse and gazebo.

“We are a bit of a special situation, but she will tell you everything you need to know.” He pauses in front of a door at the end of a hallway before knocking. A woman’s muffled voice came from behind the door. “Come in.” Copia looks back at you, smiling nervously as he opens the door to a large office. Behind a huge wooden desk, sits an older woman. The gothic arched window shines natural light from behind, highlighting the stray hairs that escaped from her low bun. She looks up at you, smiling and clapping her hands together.

“Ah! Here you are, our newest little candidate.” She gestures to the two huge leather seats in front of her desk “Please sit, we have much to talk about before you decide to take the position, C? Could you go get the others? We’ll introduce them after our talk here.” You sit down hesitantly, tilting your head slightly while the leather whines under the new weight as Copia (C?) exits the room hurriedly.

Sister Imperator turns back to you, clasping her hands together and placing them on her desk. “Now, we do things differently here. You just heard me talk about the ‘others’. Like churches have Fathers, we have our own version. We have our Papas!’

You stare at her for a moment, furrowing your eyebrows. “Like… just… Papas?” She smiles at you, nodding her head, and pulls out a couple records from under her desk, each with the word “Ghost” on them. The same Ghost that was mentioned in their listing.

“Back in the 60s, when the Ministry first started, we had the idea of starting a band to further spread our reach.” She lays the records one by one on her desk, in a line. You’re assuming in the order of their release. “Each time a frontman is promoted, he gains the title of ‘Papa’. So far we have had four. I wanted you to meet them so you can form your decision, since you’ll mainly be working with them.”

You look down at the records, skeletal faces and figures staring back at you. “What will I be doing?” You ask, tracing a finger over the edges of the record covers. “Nothing too strenuous, basically a type of assistant for whichever Papa you choose for the day, or whatever hours you can manage.”

“Ok, that sounds… doable.” Just as you look back up at Sister Imperator, a knock sounds through the room. Turning in the chair, you’re met with four pairs of mismatched eyes. What caught your attention, apart from the apparently common white eye around here,  was the fact that every one of them, except Copia, had skull makeup that matched the records in front of you. One of them looked much calmer than the others, holding his hands together in front of his body, wearing black and red robes. The next wore green and black robes, with a more stern expression. Although it might just be the makeup because the third one has such a different atmosphere to him, with a more stylized skull than the others.

You can’t help but wonder if they just walk around like that, full garb and everything. While looking them over, Sister Imperator stands up from behind her desk. She walks over to stand next to you, gesturing in your general direction before addressing the men.

“Thank you all for coming. As you may know, we got an applicant for the internship position. I thought it would be beneficial for them to meet you before accepting the position.” You stumble on your way up from the leather seat, feeling the need to stand while Sister Imperator tells them about you. Looking between the Papas and Sister for an awkwardly quiet moment, the second Papa approaches you. He gently reaches for your hand, waiting until you choose to place it in his palm,  then he bows slightly to place a light peck on the back. For such a scary looking man, he’s very gentle with you, maybe not wanting to scare you off.

Watching him with slightly widened eyes, he backs away a step to introduce himself. “I am the second Papa Emeritus, but you may call me Secondo.” And before you can stop yourself, you ask “You’re literally named Two?” immediately slapping your hands over your mouth, kinda horrified that you just said that to his face. They all chuckle, the third one actually full belly laughing as he comes up behind Secondo and clapping him on the shoulder.

“Si, si, our father was not very creative! That old man back there is named Primo, you’ve already met little Copia, and you may know me as Terzo.” A devilish grin spreads across his face, which you guess is appropriate considering who they worship here. You raise your eyebrows as ‘Primo’ heaves a sigh, joining the others that have now moved closer to you. “You may ignore our brother Terzo over there, we do, constantly.” he says, lifting your hand like Secondo did, but holding it in both hands instead of kissing it. It doesn’t feel uncomfortable though, Primo exudes a more peaceful feeling compared to the others, and smells slightly like… roses?

“We have never offered a position like this before, but we hope you feel at ease here.” He gives one little affirming shake of your hand, then let's go, stepping back to be in line with the other Papas, who you’ve just learned are his brothers. Seemingly feeling left out, Copia peeks his head out from behind the line of siblings, offering a shy wave towards you. “We have already met earlier, but it’s nice to, eh, formally meet you.”

Terzo looks back, rolling his eyes and shaking his head while talking to you “He is our current Papa, hard to believe he’s able to manage a whole band of ghouls-” Secondo elbows him in the ribs in the middle of his sentence, giving him a stern look. “What-” you start to ask before Sister Imperator places her hands on your shoulders, attempting to lead you out of her office. “Well that’s enough of that!” she exclaims, pushing you past the gaggle of Papas. “Why don’t we take a tour through the ministry! See what our buildings have to offer!” Taking a quick look just as you pass the doorway, you catch Primo hitting Terzo on the back of his head, and talking to him in Italian, which you assume is him being reprimanded for whatever he just said.

“Do I get to ask what that was about?” You look towards Sister Imperator, who has since slowed down from her previous pace of rushing out of that room. “Don’t you worry about him, he was our more ‘out of the box’ Papa in past years.” She assures you, patting you on the back. “It’s nothing you won’t get to know eventually, if you do want to work here that is.” You exhale a single laugh, apparently there was more going on here than you originally thought.

Going through the tour, nothing very exciting happens. You pass by some other nun looking people, who you learn from Sister Imperator are called the sisters of sin. Even with Imperator, you still get strange looks, until she catches them looking.

You do meet another Papa though, apparently their father, as he’s called Nihil. He’s a strange old man, looking like he’s about to disintegrate if you walk by him too fast. But after meeting him, the tour comes to an end. As Sister Imperator walks up to the front door, she pauses. “I hope you do consider taking up the intern position. You don’t have to answer now, but I hope to see your decision within the next few days.” She smiles one last time before opening the door for you, waving as you walk out.

You pause once you reach the bottom of the front steps, it had certainly gone better than you thought. But you didn’t even know what to expect walking into this. Taking a breath, you start walking back to the little bus station. The feeling of being watched comes back, but it somehow feels calmer this time around.

[ineffablemuffins]

Eternity

[ineffablemuffins]

Just some more doodles for my dumb lil au

[ineffablemuffins]

The ancients before they became leaders

A small story after the cut (please forgive me its not great because i’m not much of a writer anymore 💔)

The sun had already begun to set as the group of cats traversed through Spice Clan's grassy fields. Goldenwings pushed through the tall sprouts with ease, the other four followed closely in her wake.

"How do you ever know your way around here, Goldenwings? I'd get hopelessly lost!" Hollylight bellowed joyfully, her tail held high.

Goldenwings rolled her eyes, "I have a great sense of direction! Use your nose, Hollylight, and you'll never be lost. " The she-cat nosed her way out onto an abandoned twoleg path. Her companions let out a collective relieved sigh.

"I thought we were lost for a moment. Not that Goldenwings would lead us astray, though." Pureheart purred as he bumped heads with Goldenwings as a thanks. The tan she-cat trilled and puffed out her chest.

Hollylight took the lead now that they neared Sugar Clan territory. Lilysong fell into step with the large tabby, rubbing against her side. Goldenwings trotted a few strides in front but slowed to walk beside the other two. Hollylight glanced back at the toms that followed, "Don't fall too far behind, slow pokes!"

Darkwind let out a huff but couldn't stifle a small purr at the she-cats banter. He nosed Pureheart's ear, urging him to walk faster. Pureheart chirped at the touch, "I don't want to trip over my paws in unfamiliar territory. We won't fall far behind if Hollylight slows her pace just a pinch." Pureheart said the second sentence a bit louder so Hollvlight would hear him. Hollylight shot him a glance, then immediately remembered he wouldn't be able to see it. She opted to swish her tail over his snout, causing him to sneeze.

Gee I sure hope they stay happy and nothing happens to them in the future.

[ineffablemuffins]

This song is so Sarah x Krolock

[ineffablemuffins]

Twenty Years

@cheerchy's prize for winning my scavenger hunt event! Enjoy!

As every work of mine is, this was beta read by the fabulous @mysteriahatya!

WARNING: Contains blood(jam) and violence.

~

“My darling, what’s the matter? Why do you look so forlorn?” Pure Vanilla asks, reaching out to hold his son’s shoulder. The young prince strikes his hand away with a gloved fist, scoffing.

“Do not touch me, healer,” Dark Choco sneers, storming past him and through the Citadel gates. The guards watch them in shock while Pure Vanilla frantically rushes after his son. His entire body screams at him to run, to get away from whatever darkness is shrouding his boy, but he can’t. He has to help him.

“Choco, please! Wait!” He hollers, chasing him through the halls as the boy stalks towards the throne room. “What’s wrong? Please, talk to me.”

“I said, leave me be!” Dark Choco shouts, whipping around and glaring at him. He shrinks back, eyes widening. His son has never behaved like this before. Ever. He searches the boy’s face for any sign of remorse or shock at his own temper, but he finds nothing but contempt in those ruby eyes. Servants who were once busy around them trickle away, leaving the two of them alone.

A shiver runs up his spine when his son rests his hand over a black sword pommel, stark against the white of his tunic. It’s a threat, and he knows it, but he presses on. “You know very well I can’t do that. You’re my son, Dark Choco; your father and I baked you ourselves. I love you, my sweet boy. Please, talk to me. Tell me what troubles you.” He reaches up, taking his son’s face in his hands. “You can tell me anything. I am here for you.”

There’s a moment of hesitation, a hint of confusion in his eyes before they harden again. Dark Choco shoves him back and draws his blade, pointing it directly at his throat. His Soul Jam screams at him to move, to flee, but he can’t. The blade at his throat, it isn’t normal. He can practically hear its hypnotic song from here, and the red gem wedged in its cross guard glints maliciously. He sees the same strange glint in his son’s eyes.

“I told you not to touch me, fool!” The prince bellows. His hands are trembling, but the sword remains steady, a hair’s breadth from his Soul Jam. One misstep and he’s as good as crumbs. He raises his hands in placation, keeping them in view. “Dark Choco… Put the blade down. Please.” His voice is just barely a whisper. He doesn’t even know how he manages to keep them steady. “Throw down your weapon. I can see what it is, what it’s doing to you. I can heal what it has done. But you have to drop it first.”

Again, his son’s eyes lose that horrible sheen. Dark Choco heaves a shuddering breath, but the sword doesn’t lower. “I-I can’t-- I don’t-- It won’t--” He grunts suddenly and falls to one knee, using the sword for support to hold himself up. He clutches his head, crying out in pain, and Pure Vanilla moves on instinct.

He drops down next to his son, taking his face in his hands once more. “It’s alright, my boy, just fight it. Fight it for me, please.” He rushes to heal his son’s mind, hoping to work while the sword’s influence wavers, but he isn’t fast enough.

The blade is colder than anything he’s ever felt in his life.

He chokes, looking down at the hilt of the sword jutting out of his stomach. Already, warm jam slips around the metal, dripping to the floor between them. The blade, nestled among his insides and so unnaturally cold, sings with satisfaction. The red gem glows brighter, illuminating his jam in an eerie glow. He can already feel it draining him, but he can’t do anything but whimper. He slumps forward, eyes wide as he stares straight ahead. He’s just been stabbed. He’s just been stabbed by his son. He grips at Dark Choco’s tunic, gasping for breath into his son’s shoulder. 

His son is wide-eyed, staring down at him in horror. “Appa, I-I--”

“What have you done?!”

Dark Cacao barrels down the hallway towards the two of them. His own blade is already drawn, and his own Soul Jam glistens ferociously. His eyes are wild and dangerous, teeth bared in a snarl. It’s like a switch is flipped, and Dark Choco shoves him away and yanks his blade from his abdomen, making him scream. He raises the jam-coated blade just in time to block Dark Cacao’s strike.

Pure Vanilla chokes on his blood, pressing his hands over the wound as hard as he can. Jam, hot and sticky, bubbles up and around the pressure, continuing to fall. He frantically begins healing himself. He has to stop this before it gets out of hand. Dark Choco just stabbed him, yes, but that wasn’t him. It was the sword. He knows it was the sword. His boy would never do something like that. His magic burns as he tries to heal himself, drawing another scream from his lips. The wound slowly pulls itself back together, leaving a massive, discolored scar in its place. He struggles back to his feet.

His husband and son are locked in a vicious fight, neither managing to land a blow on the other. He knows that won’t last long; Dark Choco may be young and agile, but his father far surpasses him in experience and strength. 

“Stop!” He cries, using his staff to support himself. He hobbles closer. They’ll hurt each other if he doesn’t intervene; they’ll kill each other. “Stop fighting! Drop your weapons!”

Dark Cacao blocks another blow, casting a glance his way before he jumps away from Dark Choco, panting for breath. “Explain yourself, boy.” His grip on his sword is tight, and Pure Vanilla can see his hands shaking as he holds himself back. He makes his way over in the silence, grasping the arm holding his sword gently. Still, his husband doesn’t relent. There’s another beat, and Dark Cacao growls, “I said explain yourself!”

“I owe nothing to you, old man. Not an apology nor an explanation.” Dark Choco crouches down, readying himself for another attack. “The fool angered me. I warned him, and he did not listen.”

“Enough of this! Both of you!” Pure Vanilla shouts. The effort makes him sway on his feet, and Dark Cacao drops his sword to support him before he falls. He grips his husband’s robes, looking up into his alarmed face. “The sword! The sword- It’s not-- He can’t--”

Dark Choco suddenly rushes at them, and Dark Cacao is too late to block his slash. The great king roars in pain as the blade slices through his back, carving a gash from shoulder to hip. He twists around, managing to slash Dark Choco across the face before he falls to his knees with Pure Vanilla clinging to him. Pure Vanilla thinks he might be screaming, but he can’t be sure. His hands wander the vast wound, trying to settle on a good place to heal first. Between the blade draining his energy and having to heal himself, he’s not sure he’ll be able to heal it completely.

He can feel hot tears falling down his cheeks as guards flood the corridor and shout commands, but he doesn’t listen. He runs his fingers over the wound over and over, healing it bit by bit. Dark Cacao keeps shouting and trying to get up, but he doesn’t manage to stand until Pure Vanilla finishes healing him with what little magic he had left. “Leave!” He bellows, picking up his greatsword. Even wounded, he levels the sword and points it at their son without wavering. “Leave, and…” He pauses, looking down at Pure Vanilla. Frantically, he shakes his head. He looks at their son, clutching his face in one hand and his sword in the other. His remaining eye stares at them, and he can’t pick out the emotions writhing behind the sheen of that wretched sword. Still, that’s his son. His boy.

“No, my love. Please, don’t…” He begs, grasping his cape. He sobs, bowing his head in supplication. “Please don’t do it…”

Dark Cacao frowns, seeming swayed for a moment before he sees the jam covering him and the scarred dough shown by his torn robes. His gaze hardens and he turns back to Dark Choco. His voice doesn’t shake even when Pure Vanilla lets out an anguished wail. “Leave! And never return!”

~~~

Pure Vanilla knows that today will be a hard day before he even opens his eyes. His body is stiff and his head is throbbing. He groans, groping around next to him to find his husband, and finds nothing but cold sheets. He sits up with a huff and grabs his staff from its spot at his bedside. He looks around the room and finds it empty except for himself. Dark Cacao must be in the throne room already.

He feels chilled to the bone as he gets ready for the day, going through each motion like nothing more than a marionette on a string. The cold seeps into his very essence, dragging him down. He wants nothing more than to climb back in bed, but that isn’t an option right now. He has work to do.

He glances at the small calendar hanging above the dresser, and his heart just about stops. No, it can’t be that day. Already? He could have sworn it wasn’t for another month. Had it really been twenty years since he last saw his son? He stumbles back into the bed, sitting down as his knees buckle under him. He hasn’t seen Dark Choco in two decades as of today. He hears the door swing open and shut across the room, but he can’t find it in himself to look up, not as he hangs his head and buries his face in his hands. 

His little boy. He remembers it like it was yesterday, allowing his son to venture out on his own. His confident smile as he waved goodbye and strode off into the winter forests would haunt his memory forever, knowing it was the last time he ever saw his son as himself. He was so different when he came back, like a piece of him was missing. He remembers his Soul Jam crying out and recoiling from the ominous presence looming over the boy he once cherished.

A weight dips the bed beside him and strong arms pull him close to the smell of sandalwood and cocoa powder. He lifts his head to look his husband in the eye, even as his vision is blurred by tears. “Twenty years…”

“I know, ‘Nilla. I know.” Dark Cacao brushes his hair from his face, kissing his nose. “I brought you some tea, and we don’t have to speak to anyone today. We can stay here.”

As guilty as he feels for shirking his duties, the relief far outweighs it. No half-hearted condolences or whispers of ‘the traitor,’ as people seemed so keen on referring to their son. He nods slowly and takes the cup of tea from his husband, sniffling and wiping his tears away. “Thank you. I don’t think I can face anyone today.” He takes a small sip, letting the warm chamomile soothe his aching throat. He feels more tears dripping from his lashes, but Dark Cacao wipes them away before he can move.

“Neither can I.”

They sit in silence for some time, quietly sipping tea and staying close to one another’s warmth. Once he finishes his tea, Pure Vanilla shuffles and tucks his legs beneath himself, leaning on Dark Cacao. He realizes after a moment that his shoulders are shaking, and he peeks at his husband’s face. 

“Oh, my love…” He whispers, cupping his cheeks. He wipes away the tears with his thumbs as Dark Cacao had done for him. He takes the cold cup from him and wiggles into his lap, wrapping his arms around his neck. Dark Cacao heaves a soft sob and pulls him close, weeping into his chest.

“Our son… Our boy…” He gasps, clutching at Pure Vanilla’s nightshirt like he’ll fall apart if he lets go. “I should have done more to help him… I should have listened!”

“None of that,” Pure Vanilla hiccups, feeling his own throat grow tight with cries he tries to hold back. “It is in the past now. There is nothing we can do besides wait.”

Only a month into the prince’s exile, he finally managed to tell Dark Cacao the situation after he had been avoiding the subject. He made an announcement clearing the prince’s name and calling for his return, but he never showed up. Pure Vanilla remembers poring over old tomes for an explanation and finding out that his poor son had found the Strawberry Jam Sword, which was known to possess its user and drive them to violence.

He remembers the utter horror on Dark Cacao’s face when he told him, the guilt of having hurt his son while he was under the influence of some dark power. He remembers holding each other and watching the Citadel gates together for months, praying for their son to come back. He glances out the window at the frigid landscape and the unwavering walls of the Citadel. Twenty years they’ve waited with nothing to show for it except broken hearts. 

Dark Cacao sobs again, and Pure Vanilla runs his fingers through his hair. “I miss him, too. Every single day,” He whispers, voice cracking. He sniffles and rubs his cheek before hugging his husband once more, running his fingertips over the large scar on his back.

“Do you remember what he told us that morning? Before he left?” Dark Cacao chokes out, looking up at him. “He told us he was going to better the kingdom somehow and that exploring was the first step to finding ways to improve.”

Pure Vanilla’s throat tightens up. That had always been Choco’s dream. He wanted the kingdom to thrive, no matter who ruled. He just wanted his people to be happy and healthy. His tongue is dry as he opens his mouth, but he’s stopped short by frantic pounding on the door. He gasps as Dark Cacao grasps his waist and moves him to the bed, storming towards the disruption.

“What?!” He barks at the poor soul behind the interruption.

“The prince!” A courier squeaks out. Pure Vanilla can hear the tremble in their voice. “Th-The prince has returned! He waits at the Citadel gates!” And just like that, they flee down the hallway.

Pure Vanilla stands on shaky legs, clutching his heart as it threatens to beat its way out of his chest. He rushes to grab his staff and locks eyes with his husband. Without a word, he grabs his cloak and grabs Dark Cacao’s hand, sprinting down the hallways towards the gates. 

Surely, it can’t be true. This must be some sort of ploy or cruel joke. Has his son truly come back? 

The snow hardly feels cold under his bare feet as he stumbles his way outside. He doesn’t care, not when his stomach is doing flips and his hands tremble this way. Dark Cacao is the only thing keeping him from falling on his face at this point, although he doesn’t seem much better. He practically flies down the steps as a crowd comes into view at the gates. A watcher spots them and hollers for the others to move, parting to make way for the kings. Pure Vanilla freezes in his tracks, and Dark Cacao is right behind him. He feels his hand on his shoulder, and he rests his own hand over it. His hand is warm and the cold of the outdoors is stinging, so this can’t be a dream.

It really is him.

He looks different now, but somehow just the same. He’s still a carbon copy of his father with those white streaks in his hair and that solemn look in his eye. His hair is chopped short and obscures one side of his face, but he can see a scar peeking out from behind the onyx tresses. The armor he wears is dented and rusty, and he can see a gauntness to his face he wished he could unsee. He bears no weapon, but he has a scabbard strapped to his belt.

“Choco…?” His voice doesn’t feel like his own anymore. They step closer to one another, and his eye darts between Pure Vanilla and Dark Cacao. He stops in front of them and falls to his knee, bowing his head low. 

“Your Majesties. I have come to beg forgiveness for my past transgressions.” Dark Choco’s voice is raspy and low, so different from all those years ago. But still, it’s him. It’s the same timbre he remembers from those last few minutes. He raises his head, looking between the two of them with that ruby eye he’s seen over and over again in his memories. There is no more hateful sheen or dullness, only his son. “I have no excuse for my actions, but I shall do my best to atone for what I have done to you and to this kingdom. I can only hope that--”

Pure Vanilla drops to his knees, wrapping his arms around his son with a wail he can’t keep in anymore. His cry echoes off the walls of the Citadel, mirrored only by Dark Cacao’s as he follows suit. He takes both Choco and Pure Vanilla in his arms, squeezing them tight to his chest. Dark Choco stiffens in shock, but neither of them stop.

Pure Vanilla’s face hurts from how widely he smiles as he takes his son’s face in his hands. The tears are hot on his cheeks, and his son’s skin is rough under his fingertips. His heart flutters like a dove sprung from a cage. With all these sensations, this surely must be real. 

“Our son…” He sobs, pressing a frantic kiss to Choco’s forehead. The stunned man only watches him. “You’re home. You’re really home, it’s--” He chokes on a sob, and tries again, “I can’t believe it’s you!” He pulls Choco closer, practically squeezing him to death.

Dark Cacao doesn’t seem to be faring much better. He sobs under his breath, keeping both of them tucked close to his chest and wrapped in his heavy cloak. He blocks out the cold like a wall, keeping them all warm in spite of the fact that they’re all sitting in the snow. “Our boy. My son, I’m so sorry…” He hiccups, mimicking Pure Vanilla’s kiss to his forehead. “I’m so sorry for what I did to you, for what happened.”

“We know it wasn’t your fault,” Pure Vanilla sniffles, bringing Choco’s attention to him again. “That sword, it was evil. But you got rid of it.” He rubs his thumbs under his son’s eyes, watching as tears begin to gather on his lashes. “I’m so proud of you. I’m so grateful you’re home.”

Dark Choco’s lip trembles. “Appa… Father…” He whispers, finally shifting to hug him back. He’s overly cautious with his actions, hugging Pure Vanilla like he’ll disappear if he makes one wrong move. “I’m so sorry for what I’ve done to you both. I’m sorry, I’m sorry…”

“Hush now, sweet boy…” Pure Vanilla whispers, patting his shoulders. He takes a deep breath and wipes at his eyes. “Everything is alright now. You have apologized enough, and we have waited so long to hold our boy again… You’re home now, and that’s all we care about.”

[ineffablemuffins]

Modern!AU where Herbert became a rock star.

[ineffablemuffins]

Modern!AU where Herbert became a rock star.