iplaythebassoon

[iplaythebassoon]

the proudest moment of my school bassoon career was when the conductor of my wind band told me “I never thought I’d say this but, bassoon, can you be quieter?”

[iplaythebassoon]

hello! just popping in to share some art pieces I made this year with various musical instruments. I know this isn’t my typical content but I think they’re cool so here you go:

P.S. no instruments that weren’t already broken were harmed in the creation of these pieces. I didn’t saw a perfectly functional guitar up, promise. (please don’t repost but reblogs are much appreciated!)

[iplaythebassoon]

the head of the music department at our school is actually the best guy. he once stopped a rehearsal to give a speech on why we shouldn’t catch syphilis. he talked for like ten minutes in a lesson about a dog he saw in Birmingham once. he wrote the plot of a musical involving two people falling in love at a cheese club and called it Cheesy Love and tried to get us to write songs for it. when people don’t leave instruments in the lockers he prints out individual notes saying to put them away and sticks them on every single case. I love this man so much I cannot even explain.

[iplaythebassoon]

Could a 4/4 time guy and a 7/8 time guy really find love

[iplaythebassoon]

UPDATE:

I am alive! I have not posted on this blog in actual years BUT since I do still play the bassoon (also I picked up the organ recently isn’t that cool) I figured I might as well start posting again. Probably won’t be consistent or too often but I am bringing this blog back from the dead, baby! Thanks for sticking around, everyone <3

[iplaythebassoon]

Texts from a group chat where we attempt to play my header image:

[iplaythebassoon]

hey why does your header look like what homicide feels like

I would ask how you know what homicide feels like but I don’t think I want to know the answer so I will instead offer you this:

there’s more :)

[iplaythebassoon]

I haven’t been very active lately because I kinda forgot about Tumblr but I’m back, baby.

So to celebrate my reappearance, here are some of my favourite parts from the monstrosity that is my header image.

“Arranged by Accident”

“light explosives now..... and now”

“duck”

“slap thigh”

“🎶 have a nice day 🎶”

“opt. shoe horn”

“gradually become agitated”

“mute out, mute in..... sell mute”

“12th century lute”

“untie slip knot”

“rests are imaginary”

“bow real fast”

“all harpists stand up and wait”

“balance your chair on 2 legs”

“gradually slide from 12 bar blues to a more Vivaldi like cadenza”

[iplaythebassoon]

types of boys based off instruments

bass guitar

-tall!! kind of lanky, wears a lot of heavy clothes. likes to turn the volume on the television real high, sits by his window, collects wooden figurines and paints them all cool colors. deep

acoustic guitar

-soft. tiny. tiny man. listens to heavy metal with the volume on low. jumps on the bed and does that lil sigh after a long day, has a favorite stuffed animal, posters in his room with his favorite bands. flowers

viola

-beeg. BEEG!!! loves to make popcorn and get his hands all dirty, lots of curly brown hair. super elegant when he speaks but a total dumbass. drinks tea and complains when it’s too hot. thinks he knows everything.

cello

-takes u out for big dinners when he has the rent due in two days. also a lil bit slow. wears glasses n thinks he’s smart. best friends with wood, watches hgtv in his free time. probably knows how to bake bread

french horn

-tries to look cool. fails. golden hair and sparkle in his eyes, probably burnt a hot dog while making it in a pot once. types fast. loves spaghetti, pronounces it pasghetti. lots of lil trinkets. total clutz

feel free 2 add more!!!!!! ily

[iplaythebassoon]

[iplaythebassoon]

lmao ain’t that the guy from star wars?

[iplaythebassoon]

watch everyone be flat out drunk within the hour

The band kids developed a drinking game

[iplaythebassoon]

Once our primary school music teacher used actual chalk that she got from the reception play area as peg chalk for violins.

[iplaythebassoon]

You know your intonation is bad when your teacher asks “play an A minor scale, doesn’t matter which” and then when you do she pauses for a second and goes “wait was that melodic or harmonic?”

[iplaythebassoon]

I once went to a school concert and I was going to play the same piece as this kid who was like super good at piano and he played and it was like twice the speed I was playing it, with all the dynamics and mine was... mediocre at best. So I was like ‘uh oh, what do I do now’ and used the fact that I had been sick the previous week as an excuse and just didn’t play it.

[iplaythebassoon]

I remember when I went to a classical concert with my mum when I was little (she was playing in it) and afterwards I was trying to name all the instruments. It went a little like:

*sees trumpet player* “trumpet!”

*sees French horn player* “French horn!”

*sees tuba player* “uh.. big French horn?”

[iplaythebassoon]

i know absolutely nothing about instruments or being a band kid i am just here for the memes and so far i am having the time of my life, dude

thank you dude! I haven’t been posting much recently because there isn’t much to post about but when school reopens and stuff starts happening again I’ll try to post more! :)