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Leadership Intentions and Journey

During our last meeting with the Senior Director, I took the initiative to address topics related to my projects. Later that day, I approached him to express my intention to apply for a leadership position under his management and asked what qualities he seeks in a leader. To my surprise, he indicated that he already saw the leadership potential in me and emphasized that what I needed was refinement. This unexpected affirmation was striking, as I had only been doing what I felt capable of without external encouragement, aside from one supportive friend who is also a lead. I realized that my limiting mindset has been a barrier to my growth.

In the days following that conversation, I found myself reflecting on my desire for development. I am eager to acquire the skills and confidence needed before upcoming opportunities arise. I spoke to my manager about my aspirations to become a leader and my interest in receiving coaching. Although our coaching sessions have been postponed, I remain hopeful about the insights I will gain, as I believe a new perspective is essential for my growth.

So, what steps am I taking to embark on my leadership journey, and what values guide me? I believe that true leadership goes beyond simply holding a title; it involves helping, leading, and guiding others. To begin, I reached out to trainers, former SMEs, and previous agents, expressing my appreciation for their work, regardless of scale. I congratulated them on their promotions and encouraged them further, ensuring they know that I support them and have faith in their abilities. While I correct them when necessary, I also motivate them to strive for improvement. I remind them that I believe in them and encourage them to reach out when they need assistance. When they do seek guidance, I ask probing questions to help them find answers and strategize solutions. I don’t need a formal title to assist; I am committed to helping within my boundaries, and I am willing to refer them to the appropriate team lead when necessary. Additionally, I strive to communicate gently, particularly in emotionally charged situations, allowing time for contemplation before responding.

I believe that leadership is rooted in service rather than authority. One cannot lead effectively without serving others, which also means setting a positive example and making a meaningful impact in someone's life. Recently, I have focused on self-awareness, jotting down ways I can positively influence my colleagues and identifying areas for personal change to fulfill my goal of servant leadership. I have also chosen one individual to mentor to ensure our current role remains stable and our projects continue smoothly should I transition to a different position.

In terms of my progress, I hope my small steps are guiding me toward becoming the leader I aspire to be. One additional thing I recognize I need to do is to filter out unconstructive criticism. While I appreciate feedback, I must avoid listening to critical voices that lack understanding and support. Though these distractions are minimal, they can be impactful. For now, I will continue to wait, pray, and learn.

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Hoping to enter a new season.

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— Kriti G.

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Ang sabi nila bawat puso’t kaluluwa ay may kaparehang itinakda. Ang sabi pa nila ay darating kung pagbibigyan ang pag-ibig na hindi mawawala.

-Ang Sabi Nila, William Elvin (Musika hango sa "Mula sa Buwan")

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If I can rewrite my life...

I love day dreaming. This is an every day thing for me. I live in the world of my own fantasies. It helps me to cope to my every day sentiments.

And if I can rewrite my life, I would absolutely resign to my corporate job and write again. I used to work on theater scripts in High school and College. Theater is where I found my place without being in the shadow of my sister. I love writing. It is to the point that I don't care if people recognize who I am. I just want my work to be out there! I also worked as a side editor to a book before and a plot editor for an indie film. If I can rewrite my life, I would live for it. I want to write again.

I want to publish my own book. I have this huge compilation of my flash fictions. They are inspired in real life and my daily day dreaming. I let few people read it and they said it was like getting in to the deep part of my soul. I named the book "Writings under the Moonlight." I would like to share it here but I'll finish editing it first then I will put it in a share point for you to read.

I also want to put my script out there. I have one Filipino script that I am still contemplating if I want translate it or what. I want to have one more look to it before really submitting.

I have a fantasy writing that is in progress for too long but I want to finish it and publish as a book and hopefully someone gets an interest to it to make it a film. It's a fantasy/history touched story.

I want to live in the writing world. Don't get me wrong, I love my corporate job for I get to teach. I am teacher by profession and that's just the life I chose. But as I get older, I want the quiet life. If you call it cave life, I'll live for it!!! My corporate job pays my bill and I am grateful for it. I hope when I am 40 or 35, I can get to restart my life to the life I really want without thinking if it pays my rent. Everyone deserves to live their life passionately.

At 31, I am hopeful. See you when I get there! How about you? If I were to ask you, "If you can rewrite your life, how does that look like?"

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Laura K Linke

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I needed this small encouragement from work. 💖

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Today’s wedding look. 💖

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Baguio Diaries.

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Let’s Not Rot — 11/27/24

How do we navigate pain? 

Grandmother’s passing is an overwhelming feeling for me. For the first day after burial, I uncontrollably cried. I couldn’t stop even though my eyes hurt so bad. Then I started with the usual — sleep deprivation, distracting self with work, using background noise so I won’t feel alone, cut contact, stop talking about my feelings, strong urge to drink alcohol and hurt myself (though I didn’t), I was mad and sad at the same time, I got bad nightmares, and a lot more.

I honestly don’t know how to respond with pain. Sometimes, I want to translate emotional pain to physical pain because that’s easier for me. I can just clean the wounds and cover it. Does that make any sense?

How am I doing lately?

I had to force myself to do things like get up, drink, eat, clean, take a bath, go out and see the sun, walk, etc. I had no inspiration. I don’t like the things I usually enjoy. I can’t reply well with “how are yous”. I still cry from time to time. 

Let’s not rot.

It was an idea by Kait Grange on Tiktok and I am just trying here too. 

It’s been 22 days since she passed. I can’t imagine not seeing or able to call someone who has been constantly there for 31 years of my life. But what do I do not to rot? I close my eyes and say a little prayer to fight my urges to drink or hurt myself. I try to write so even though I don’t talk to people much so I can still let it out. I convince myself throwing the trash on the first floor of the building means I have to walk outside and see the sun after work. I try to text friends whom I trust even though it is so hard. I whisper to myself “send it” even though it’s tough. I try to go to family gatherings even though I don’t want to. I try so hard. I even to convince myself to take a bath even though it’s like a chore right now. But hey, I try. 

I hope this is enough for a day not to rot.

[ja-i-ruh]

“Apply for that job. Date that person. Buy that plane ticket. Move to that city. Do all the things that scare you, because they’re worth it.”

— Unknown

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The worst pain is getting hurt by the person you explained your pain to.

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I have a huge admiration for David since I started in training team. His inputs are always on spot and he’s very kind. Today, I got a chance to hang out with him and Heather, of course, and it feels so different. I get to see his gaming side, his trainer side and emotional side. This guy cried on “Deadpool & Wolverine”. He talked about his feelings about the film. He is totally nerd and intelligent. Talking about his feelings, how he cried and how the film healed his soul is a whole new world for me. A good world where I see a different him. I admire him all the more.

This is for the guy I know I will always admire from afar and as a colleague.

[ja-i-ruh]

Stop letting people consume you. they didn’t call? go to sleep. they didn’t message you? put your phone down and have a better day. they left you on read? delete the conversation. they didn’t make an effort? match their energy. never let your happiness depend on anyone