jcfourteen - Tumblr blog

[jcfourteen]

people need to understand that once you go through your worst time alone, you really don’t care who stays in your life anymore.

[jcfourteen]

You think we can make someone love us by loving them more?

as painful as it is, i think you can’t force feelings into someone.

but i also think you don’t have to hide your own emotions. if you don’t show your feelings, they will build up inside of you and become anger, and pain. rejection is also painful for sure, but at least you know you’ve tried.

loving someone has to come spontaneously, so if that person doesn’t love you back you can’t really do much about it.

we can just live in the hope to find someone better.

[jcfourteen]

[jcfourteen]

“Please stop destroying what is left of your heart by constantly thinking about things that have broken you.”

— Unknown

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“I think it’s very healthy to spend time alone. You need to know how to be alone and not be defined by another person.”

— Oscar Wilde

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i wanna heal from the things i don’t talk about.

[jcfourteen]

mastering being detached from everything yet being connected to everything at the same time. this is the secret to life i think

[jcfourteen]

“Ang bilis ng panahon” — ito lagi yung sinasabi natin tuwing nararamdaman natin ang pagsapit ng pasko. Parang inabutan na naman tayo ng susunod na taon tapos pakiramdam natin parang di ka na naka-catch up.

Feel ko hindi naman talaga mabilis ang panahon. Sadyang mas matagal lang tayo nakakauwi ng bahay ngayon. Yung byaheng sobrang bilis pag walang traffic pero dalawang oras kapag rush hour na. Yung pahinga mo na may kasamang pangamba kasi gabi na at kailangan mo na ulit magpahinga para gumising ulit sa umaga para di ka ulit ma-late kinabukasan. Mas marami lang nasasayang na panahon kakatingin sa cellphone. Mga puyat na inuutang sa gabi tapos tanghali na gigising. Baka nag-iba lang tayo ng lifestyle at inako na rin natin ang mga responsibilidad. Pero ‘yong panahon, ganun pa rin. Hindi nagbabago.

Wala na tayong oras mag muni-muni. Yung katahimikan laging may nakasingit na pangamba. Yung mga pahinga na minsan hindi na nirerespeto ng iba. Minsan, nakukuha, pero minsan pakiramdam mo’y may mali pa. Yung mga hilig natin, tinatago na lang sa isang tabi. Naghihintay magkaroon ng oras ulit. Araw-araw kang nagdadasal na manatili sana ang sigla sa mga bagay na pinapangarap mong abutin. Patuloy na nilalabanan ang mundong pabor lang lagi sa mga nasa itaas na. Paano na ang mga taong nais lang sumubok? Mga taong nagbabaka sakali?

Kaya bilib ako sa mga taong patuloy lang sa buhay. Ginagawang biro ang mga problema kahit seryoso na ang epekto sa kanila. Sana magtagumpay tayong lahat. Sana dumating yung panahon na yung mga hindi sumuko naman ang papalakpakan.

[jcfourteen]

Typewriter Series #186. Seek help when it is help you need. There is always hope. (at Helena, Montana) https://www.instagram.com/p/CiRT3xWrMO_/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[jcfourteen]

IN ANOTHER LIFETIME

SCENE: It's JC and Den's last night together. After 3 years they decided to end their relationship in order not to hurt more people.

JC and Den are cuddled in Den's bed facing each supposedly asleep but JC is still awake.

JC: sighs for the nth time.

Den's eyes were closed but she too is still awake. She then noticed that JC has been sighing every five minutes decided to open her eyes and was surprised to see JC looking at her and releasing another sigh.

Den: (while poking JC's cheeks) Hey, Jace. Why are you still up?

JC: finally waking up from her trance released another sigh then look directly at Den's eyes and said 'Ayaw ko matulog'

Den: (in slight panic) Huh? Bakit? May masakit ba sa'yo?

JC: (releasing another sigh) Ayaw ko matulog kasi alam ko pag gising ko we have to go back to just being friends. I have to be content looking and loving you from afar.

I will not be able to have and share this kind of moments with you.

Hindi ko na pwedeng gawin ito (kisses Den's forehead)

Or ito (softly kisses Den's lips)

Or even this (hugs Den tightly)

And it breaks my heart (tears escaping from JC's eyes)

Den: I'm sorry..

JC: sighs again but does not answer

Den: I'm sorry kasi if not for me you would not be hurting like this. Had I not confessed my feelings for you that night, we would not be in this situation. (Den started crying)

JC: (wiping Den's tears) Don't be. Hindi mo kailangan mag apologize. Alam ko kung ano ang pinasok ko. Alam ko the moment I told you na mahal din kita, sooner or later you're going to have to choose.

And knowing that I cannot give you a normal life, a normal relationship, I knew its never going to be me. I am not the rational and practical choice. It was really him from the start. And I took the risk.

Den: (crying) Jace... You know I will always choose you in a heartbeat.

JC: But sadly not in this lifetime, love... Maybe in the next. But now, I want you to be happy, ok? I love you, Dennise.

JC kissed Den's forehead after saying those words and then closed her eyes.

End.

[jcfourteen]

Minsan, dahil sa sobrang saya mo pag kasama mo siya nakakalimutan mo ‘yong posisyon mo sa kanya. Kung hanggang saan ka lang ba talaga. Sobrang sakit isipin na ‘yong sayang nararamdaman mo panandalian lang. Kaya naman may mga pagkakataon na matutulala ka bigla kasi biglang pumapasok sa isip mo na paano kapag dumating ‘yong araw na bigla niyang maisip na ayaw na niya? Na hindi na rin siya masaya?

Tapos ang nakakainis pa rito tatanungin mo sarili mo kung ano ang kulang sa ‘yo kasi lagi kang muntik lang. Lagi kang parte ng option pero hindi ka naman pipiliin sa huli. Andoon ka lang para ma-highlight na mas better lagi ‘yong isa.

Nakakapagod kaya. Pero wala ka naman kasing choice. Mi bawal kang magtampo kasi wala ka namang karapatan dun eh. Di naman ikaw ‘yong mahal. Di ikaw ‘yong gusto. Bakit ka magtatampo e wala namang pake sa ‘yo yon. Kaya ka nga iwan anytime eh. Kaya kang tiiisin.

Nakakapagod kasi wala ka namang ibang hangad eh. Gusto mo lang siyang kasama sa plano mo. Pero hassle kapag nagplano ka pero minasama pa right? Tapos ‘yong sakit na naramdaman mo sa ‘yo lang ‘yon. Di mo pwedeng ipakita at i-share.

Kaya huwag kang makakalimot. Alam mo dapat kung saan ka lulugar at ano ba talaga posisyon mo sa buhay niya para you know what to expect lang din.

[jcfourteen]

The sad truth is that certain types of things can't go backward. Once they start going forward, no matter what you do, they can't go back the way they were. If even one little thing goes awry, then that's how it will stay forever. (Haruki Murakami; South of the Border, West of the Sun) #LifeLesson #Quote #FavoriteQuote #Reading #ReadingList #Book #BookWorm #BookNerd #BookLover #Bookstagram #Bookish #SouthOfTheBorderWestOfTheSun #HarukiMurakami #OnLife #OnLove #OnHope #Perspective #Biblio #Bibliophile #GoodRead #IGReads #NoFilter #Photography #HappyKid https://www.instagram.com/p/CEjYWChBIie/?igshid=lx4q5rscon5c