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bruh why are they hiring emos

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good lord 😛

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THE BAU AT A PRIDE PARADE

SPENCER: Wearing a shirt labelled ‘Twink.’ He doesn’t know what it means, but a nice lady at a merch stand just handed it to him and it matches his purple scarf, so he thought ‘why not?’

PENELOPE & LUKE: Made friends with a group of fly drag queens and followed them to a karaoke bar. Both wearing multiple feather boas and… somehow covered in glitter? Both get up on the bar and start dancing the Second Lady Gaga’s ‘Born This Way’ starts playing.

EMILY: Is hungover from last night’s exploits at D.C.’s answer to the Pink Pony Club. A pair of cunty sunglasses protect her eyes from the white hot sun, and she holds her pounding head as she follows JJ through the crowd.

JJ: Five strawberry daiquiris deep and is not looking back. Thinking about how nice Emily’s hand feels in hers, and is too drunk to hide it. May have agreed to join some sort of coalition or movement? Who can remember, she can barely see.

ELLE & TARA: Have had way too many shots of tequila rose and have devolved into a fit of hysterical laughter. Taking turns hyping each other up as they twerk to Chappell Roan. Tara constantly sends drunken, sappy voice notes to Rebecca.

MORGAN: Wearing a shirt that says ‘Ally’ and dirty dancing in the middle of the parade.

HOTCH: Wearing a pair of sunglasses and a neon green ‘BRAT’ shirt. Penelope bought it for him, and after she ‘accidentally’ spilled her drink on him he had no choice but to change. Externally, he is stoic and serious. Internally? Rocking the fuck out to Madonna.

ROSSI: Has signed each and every petition offered to him. Just following the team around in his dad shirt and soaking up the vibes.

GIDEON: Sat on top of a pride float with his binoculars just watching birds.

BONUS

EMILY: Bought a planner diary labelled ‘the gay agenda.’

TARA: Didn’t know whether to be offended or delighted by the prospect of an ‘LGBTini’ cocktail, but it tasted incredibly good.

Check out my Masterlist for more BAU scenarios!

Taglist: @yorkle @emilyprentisswife @ajsbau @besofrrightnow @grapes-are-kinda-weird-ngl @prentissa @jemilyssecretlover (you’re all so babygirl 😘)

I’m starting a taglist! To be added to the taglist for the ‘bau scenarios’ series comment ‘scenarios taglist’ under either this post or (preferably) under my Masterlist post.

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bangs & s5 Emily Prentiss I love you.

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Dating early seasons Jennifer Jareau⊹ ࣪ ˖

Media liaison JJ/Early seasons JJ X BAU reader

This is my first headcanon/writing thing? So if you have advice please lmk!!

Jennifer Jareau who gets you coffee just how you like it on your desk every morning, with a little sticky note with a little compliment or a heart from Penelope's glitter gel pen.

Jennifer Jareau who let's you stay after everyone has gone home to sort through files, and continuously tells you that "She can handle it, and you can go home." But you don't leave.

Jennifer Jareau who always holds your hand with a soft smile under desks and in the jet after a long case without being asked or prompted to.

Jennifer Jareau who always worries about you on cases and wonders if she's made the right choice on what cases to pick, thinking she may have sent you into danger.

Jennifer Jareau who is always the first to meet you when you get off the jet. Hugging you and apologizing for no reason at all.

Jennifer Jareau who unavoidably smiles at you when presenting a case raising eyebrows from the rest of the bau and giggles from Morgan.

Jennifer Jareau who buys you matching necklaces and wears it every day feeling a sense of comfort when you are away on a case.

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#needthat

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there is no way to watch the beginning of s2e14 The Big Game without replaying the darts scene to look at jj’s stomach eighty times. i do not make the rules, i just follow them.

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Do you think JJ saw what happened with Spencer and Maeve and thought about how that could happen to her and Will?

Do you think JJ saw what Hotch and Haley went through with the divorce and worried that could be her years down the line?

Do you think JJ ever thought she would be raising her kids alone like Hotch did with Jack?

Do you think JJ watched the way Rossi deteriorated after Krystal's death and thought that wouldn't be her?

Do you think JJ thought she had years left with Will and the boys and how her and Will would cry at Henry's graduation?

Do you think she ever thought about what her final goodbye to Will or her boys would be if she died in the field?

Do you think she considered that death wouldn't come for them in the field, but from there own bodies?

Do you think she ever thought about how empty and dead she would feel after Will's death?

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[jjscheetos]

not jj losing. ;(

I have too much free time

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I need more Garcia in blue cause reasons

Mood. I don't even particularly care the shade of blue because she looks good in all of them. Look!

Seriously. Garcia in blue. <3

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you asked for JJ headcannons and I CAN HELP

She is a human tornado. I don't know how they decided to have JJ’s house look like she doesn't live there, but have you seen her office? She has clothes on the floor of her living room and ten cups on her nightstand. She knows where everything is, but it never belongs there. (“JJ, where are your keys?” “They're in my pants pocket on the floor in the bathroom.” “Why?” “Because they were in my pocket when I took off my pants.”)

She's a mess, but she's insanely organized. She has one of those grocery lists with a magnet stuck to her fridge. Her calendar has a million things scratched off, and it's color-coded: red for cancellations, blue for rescheduling, green for personal events, purple for team get-togethers.

She's always up early, even though she goes to sleep at three in the morning. She says that the bau had ruined her sleep schedule, but that's a complete lie. She had a job in high school, and with soccer practice and homework, that girl never slept. She does try to sleep “normal people hours,” but it just doesn't happen.

i have more, but i’m blanking rn so… bye?

OMG I LOVE YOU.

I can totally see that 😭 I feel like Will is a clean, organised person, so he would (sadly not anymore) probably clean, but I guess the closet and their bathroom (if they have their own bathroom) is a mess.

Also I am like that, I always leave my keys in my pockets and then look for them there. Currently half of my room is tidy and half a mess (including my closet), but I can and do find everything.

JEEZ I LOVE THIS 🫶🫶🫶

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she's the cutest ever

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Can we talk about the lyrics during the Garvez scene though?!?!

Penelope alone in her office:

I'm alone on the outside. But something scary is in my mind. I feel safer when I cry

Luke enters:

I want to lose myself in daydreams I want to feel the things that I see I have friends just like me They give me comfort They let me be I feel safer when I cry In my eyes

Interpret as you will

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Garcia bonding with Voit over cleansing & such was so cute. I like that they keep that detail, Pen always had a soft spot for those she viewed as broken or lonely (even killers).

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when I tell you that I almost started sobbing.

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reminder that gazafunds is a great website.

each time you load the site, it shows one randomly selected, verified fundraiser that's low on funds.

extremely straightforward, & an easy to remember url. it's my go-to when I'm able to give; removes any room for procrastination or overthinking.