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[image id: waterboarded image of a sponsored Tumblr ad by aish.com:

Title, all caps: What if I'm wasting my life and I don't even know it?

Sub-title: AI not fueled by 3000 years of Jewish wisdom

Graphics of an AI chat prompt box with a button on it reading "Ask Rabbi AI"

In small letters in the corner: currently in beta testing

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HEY I JUST HAD AN INTERESTING THOUGHT. WHAT IF WE DIDN’T.

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Explanation in alt

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[image id: a drawing of a frog holding a knife with the text "it is a beautiful day in ancient Egypt and you are a horrible frog" /.End id]

As it is Passover again, it is time for the annual debate as to whether the frog plague, which thanks to a quirk in the Hebrew, is written as a plague of frog, singular, rather than the plural, plague of frogs, was in fact, as generally imagined, a plague of many frogs, or instead a singular giant Kaiju frog. This is an ancient and venerable argument that actually goes back to the Talmud because this is what the Jewish people are. If we can't argue for fun about this sort of thing, what are we even doing.

In that spirit, I would like to submit a third possibility, which is that in fact it was one perfectly normal sized frog, who was absolutely acing Untitled Frog Game: Ancient Egypt Edition. One particularly obnoxious frog, who through sheer hard work, managed to plague all of Egypt.

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[image description: the bugs bunny in a tuxedo "I wish all a very pleasant evening" meme edited to say "I wish all of my Jewish followers a very pleasant passover". Next to bugs is a photo of a small stack of matzo and the cup of Elijah. ]

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[image id: שמות רבה, פרשת וארא, פרשה י

רבי עקיבא אומר, צפרדע אחת היתה והיא השריצה ומלאה את ארץ מצרים. אמר לו רבי אלעזר בן עזריה, עקיבא! מה לך אצל הגדה? כלה מדברותיך ולך אצל נגעים ואהלות! צפרדע אחת היתה ושרקה להן ובאו

R. Akiva says, there was one frog which gave birth to swarms of frogs which covered the land of Egypt. R. Elazar ben Azariah told him: Akiva! Why are you teaching Midrash? Keep quiet and go to the laws of impurity! There was one frog, who whistled to the rest and brought them up from the Nile.

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I love that in Akiva and Elazar’s debate over Plague of Frog™️ they don’t even disagree that it was just one frog, simply whether that frog gave birth to the rest of the frogs or just whistled to summon them from the Nile

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[image id: The woman cleaning before guests arrive meme: "Get rid of the grains! We can't let people know we eat chametz!" /.End ID]

Happy soon to be pesach everyone

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[image id: picture of a bunch of chametz food inside a plastic bag with "chametz prison" written on it in sharpie. /.End id]

when you can't really keep kosher for passover because you share a house

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[image id: the Spiderman pointing at Spiderman meme. The left Spiderman is "Diaspora Jews worried about Israelis" and the right Spiderman is "Israelis worried about diaspora Jews". /.End id]

the eternal conflict of diaspora jews worried about jews in israel while jews in israel feel like being in israel is the safest and worry about the jews in diaspora having no protection

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[image id: picture of Matzah in a toaster with the caption "Mom, these pop-tarts suck." /.End id]

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[image id: picture of a car's side mirror with a Matzah box reflected on it. Under it is the text "objects in the mirror are closer than they appear" /.End id]

Objects in mirror are closer than they appear.

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[image id: a tweet from Rachel Shomel (@/RShomel) that reads:

The 3yo asked my husband to make him a pita with Matzah balls for dinner. And thus was born the Ashkenazi falafel.

The tweet is pasted over an image of a halved pita being held, containing three Matzah balls. /.End id]

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[image id: an otter holding a dreidel, the letter ה facing the camera. /.End id]

Everybody shut up and look at the Cincinnati zoo Hanukkah otter

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praying for your mutuals is honestly so freaking funny

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Dara Horn

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humalien said: the sound in this room is so strange…