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imagining a conclave beach episode in all its wrinkly glory. give me thomas lawrence in board shorts with saggy tits and a sunburn that appeared immediately after he took off his shirt. give me tedesco with even saggier tits sitting on a bigass rock and blowing vape smoke at seagulls. vincent is paddleboarding in a deliciously skintight wetsuit despite everyone on the shore sweating buckets afraid that the pope is gonna eat shit on a wave. im old man maxxing on this beach and no one can stop me. gerontophiles rise.

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LETS FUCKING GOOOOOO

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he or perhaps his brother would do numbers on here

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rawr

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yeahh

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Top 10 things to say to snag his Hotiness

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judgment

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You ever hear that old chestnut about how most people neglect the part of the story of Icarus where he also had to avoid flying too low, lest the spray of the sea soak his feathers and cause him to fall and drown? You ever think about how different the world would be if Icarus died that way instead? If the idiom was to Fly To Close To The Sea? A warning against playing it far too safe, about not stretching your wings and soaring properly? You ever think about how Icarus died because he was happy?

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thinking about vincent having surgery trauma from living in an active warzone + the biggest Discovery of his life happening after a surgery and at some point during his position as pope he needs to get some sort of minor surgery for xyz health problem and the normally more or less unflappable vincent benitez is just. freaking the fuck out and trying very hard to hide it but he is Terrified and it's maybe the first time the people closest to him fully realise who he is as a person beyond faith

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If you ever feel like a loser just remember there are people who are genuinely emotionally invested in the lives of the british royal family

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Unfinished sketch

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I loved every minute of Superman

Casey's Supes Problem

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excuse me for stating the obvious but like. james gunn outright calling superman an immigrant and doubling down on it when he got backlash (because he IS an immigrant, that's the point of superman) + the in-movie dialogue of "aren't you going to read me my rights?" "you're an extraterrestrial, son. you haven't got any rights to read." + the violence of his arrest and how they torture and mistreat him unapologetically, all under the guise of "protecting america", in a film releasing during the onslaught of violent ICE kidnappings and abuse... yeah it's really no wonder right-wing knobheads are crying about this being woke. they're being forced to look directly at the reasons one of the most well-known and beloved heroes of all time would not be on their side. and that's only ONE of the reasons this movie covers

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two characters: flirty banter, clearly getting off on the power dynamics between them

people who are scared of going to hell for masturbating: he loves him like a son

me, hauving covid: can he call him that while they fuck

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Archbishop of Where?

A meta for the Conclave (2024) fandom on the situation of Christians, especially Roman Catholics, in present day Afghanistan (both before and after the 2021 Taliban takeover), and on what a day in the life of an Archbishop of Kabul would actually look like.

It got too long for a Tumblr post so you can read it here on AO3.

Part of Jolie's Weekly Lectures on Catholic Church Organisation, Canon Law and Other Things You Never Thought You Would End Up Wanting To Read Meta About Until You Contracted The Old Men Yaoi Bug 😝

If you have questions, comments or corrections, please get in touch!