just-ed-recovery

[just-ed-recovery]

My ED: ignore your hunger

My true self @me

[just-ed-recovery]

thats the shit i do like! yeah, i made another positive meme. because why not

[just-ed-recovery]

eating and weight gain aren’t the enemy. your eating disorder is.

[just-ed-recovery]

you know what doesn’t matter? what other people are eating. seriously. stop. just because your friend karen got a salad does not mean you shouldn’t have the pizza. order that fucking pizza and do not for a second think you’re worth any less than her

[just-ed-recovery]

all food is good food!! all food can provide some benefit to your body, and all food will give you energy to get through your day. eating something that’s considered “unhealthy” is infinitely better than eating nothing at all.

[just-ed-recovery]

be open with your love and loud with your laughter. life is so much brighter when lived genuinely.

[just-ed-recovery]

no body is meant to stay at the same weight

[just-ed-recovery]

the mantra for me when dealing w dysmorphia in recovery is: “my food is not accountable for my body, my body is not a punishment for my food.” i can’t always control how i feel about my body internally but i can control how i treat it externally, and i will do that with care, rest, and as much food as it wants!

[just-ed-recovery]

Gaining weight does not make you a worse person, and losing weight doesn’t make you a better one. Your weight is not a reflection of your worth.

[just-ed-recovery]

I’ll stop when

You reach that number? That size? Oh, OK, you’ll stop when you’re happy with your body. That’ll happen right? Sure, you’ll just wake up, step on the scale, put on those jeans, smile at your reflection and get back to the way things were.

Wake up.

There is no happy number or size or reflection. There is no turning point. There is no ‘I’ll stop now’. 

There are more goals more targets more rules more numbers; more more more more more. Anorexia will not ever be happy, not at anything. You’ve heard it from professionals and those in recovery and those who’ve had an eating disorder and been the ‘worst of the worst’ but you don’t believe any of them.

Well start to.

Because one day you’re going to be sat there at the moment you promised yourself you would stop and it will hit you that there is no moment, there is no achievement, there is just more hurting to come. 

Stop listening to the evil in your mind and listen to the people who know, listen to the people who care and destroy the thought that you ‘will stop when…’ Its just another lie. 

[just-ed-recovery]

anyways, you don’t need to earn food. you need food whether you’ve worked out or not, whether you’ve walked 10,000 steps or not, whether you ate a lot yesterday or not. you need food. you deserve to have food. don’t let society try to convince you that you don’t.

[just-ed-recovery]

Having a binge-related eating disorder does not make you “weak” or “out of control.”

This is a real illness.

It is not your fault.

You deserve health and happiness.

You are strong and brave.

[just-ed-recovery]

Recovery doesn’t mean you didn’t suffer. Recovery doesn’t make your past experiences less real. Recovery just means you’ve decided you don’t want to keep suffering.

[just-ed-recovery]

I think we need to remember that recovery isn’t all rainbows and butterflies,

It’s not all pints of Ben and Jerry’s and avocado toast,

or all recovery wins and ‘fear food Friday’s’

You hear people talk about the good day’s in recovery, but never the ones where they almost threw in the towel

No one talks about the days where you stand in front of the toilet, arguing with yourself. You know you shouldn’t do it but, but oh God, you want to

No one talks about the days where you stand in front of the mirror, cursing yourself for gaining weight,

No one talks about how hard it is to throw out laxatives, or diuretics, or diet pills

We need to talk about the hard parts.

Because once you get past the initial recovery high, it’s not easy

Struggling doesn’t mean you’re failing

Struggling doesn’t mean you’re doing something wrong

Struggling doesn’t mean you can’t get better

Recovery is made of not only highs, but lows too

The lows can be some of the most important parts

Because it’s easier to eat when you’re motivated,

But you need to learn to do it when you’re not

There’s going to be times where you mess up and fall down

There’s going to be days where everything absolutely sucks

But those are the times where you learn the most

Recovery takes perseverance, it takes really hard work

And it takes time

You’re not going to wake up one day, magically recovered

These behaviours and thoughts are ingrained in our minds, and we have to build new pathways

But we will get there

We are strong enough

And just because recovery is hard, doesn’t mean it’s not worth it

Your eating disorder will never be worth it

So keep trying,

Until the hard days are far and few between,

Until you can eat because you want to, and not just because you have to,

Until you can look in the mirror without wincing,

Until the thoughts of food and weight don’t take up all the space in your mind,

Until you can see that there is more to life than being sick.

Recovery may be one the hardest things you ever have to do,

But it will also be one of the best.

[just-ed-recovery]

seriously guys recovering is so nice once you realize all the little things you can do that you couldn’t do earlier in the process! sure i’m still struggling, recovery is a long process and there may never be a definite end. but god ! i am so much better than i used to be!

[just-ed-recovery]

Reminder: you didn’t get sick overnight and you won’t get healthy overnight. Recovery is a process. Growth takes time (and patience).

[just-ed-recovery]

eating disorders are about a lot of things but maybe the thing they’re most about is a fear of our painful emotions and the drive to avoid them. that avoidance seems like our only means of psychological survival at the time. and it does allow us to survive whatever pain threatens us, but only temporarily