justmarcusz

[justmarcusz]

This afternoon, after I finished feeding the chickens like I always do,

I sat down and relaxed near the chicks’ coop while playing with my phone.

And, as usual, I was also waiting for Mas Bright.

And… yup. He appeared.

He walked toward the goat pen, but only briefly.

Then he walked east, carrying a sickle.

I thought maybe he was coming to my backyard again,

maybe to trim some branches,

because yesterday my dad had offered him some branches from the longan tree if he wanted them.

But nope.

Turns out, he was just planning to cut some branches from his own trees along the property line.

While he was inspecting the tree, I could see him clearly,

but I didn’t dare stare too long.

So I kept glancing down at my phone to make it seem casual.

But once he started climbing,

that’s when I finally allowed myself to watch him freely.

And when he started climbing down,

I recorded him.

At first, I was afraid he’d notice,

I was holding my phone vertically, like obviously recording.

So I quickly switched to holding it horizontally, like I was just playing a game.

That way, I didn’t look suspicious.

Even though the distance was pretty far, and the zoom wasn’t that great,

I was still so happy I managed to capture that moment.

After a while, Mas Bright finished,

then fed his goats again.

I thought that was the end of it.

But then, he came back to the tree line and looked up, as if he was going to trim some more branches.

But no, he didn’t.

Instead, he went into the shed and came back out carrying a sack and his sickle,

then walked east across the border.

And I knew exactly where he was going.

Yup..he was heading back to that abandoned fish pond to gather grass again.

As he walked toward the pond,

I watched him from behind and thought,

“Ughh… God, he’s so handsome, even from the back.”

A few seconds later, he arrived at the pond and started heading west,

looking for lush grass to feed his goats.

As I watched him walk, I thought to myself,

“Damn, he looks so bright… so hot, wearing that light green long-sleeved shirt,

shorts, and white shoes. Ughhh, I want him.”

Then I went back inside to take a shower,

got ready,

and returned to my backyard to wait and see him again, just like I’d planned.

As I saw him walking back east again,

I whispered inside,

“Oh God… he looks sooo much brighter. I love it.”

It’s too hot to handle, you know what I mean.

Before he reached my backyard,

I went into my shed to get the styrofoam box, then went to the chick coop to start putting the babies into it.

Because honestly, I couldn’t bear to see him up close without saying anything.

So I pretended to be busy putting the chicks in the box.

Which was perfect timing, since it was already time for them to go in anyway.

After that, I glanced back toward his backyard, but he was nowhere in sight.

And that’s the end of today’s story.

[justmarcusz]

"Dear God,

I want something new in my life.

Something that I never felt before.

Something that I never done before.

Something that can change the rest of my life.

Something that I really wanted.

Please give it to me!

At least let me taste it, let me feel it.

Because I'm sick of this kind of life, please!"

[justmarcusz]

Part 6

So earlier this afternoon, my dad received an invitation to attend a memorial gathering for someone who had passed away.

But he wanted me to go instead.

And I said, “Sure, I’ll go.”

So I went to the event.

Before entering the house where it was held, I stood outside along with a few other guests.

And then—guess what?

Yessss... Mas Bright showed up too.

Just like I had secretly wished in my heart:

“I hope Mas Bright also gets invited and comes.”

He parked his motorcycle right near where I was standing.

Then he looked at me and said,

“Oh? You’re already here?”

I didn’t answer right away.

Instead, I asked back,

“How are you? Still okay?”

(referring to the ant bites from earlier that afternoon)

He replied,

“I’m fine. Just a little sore, that’s all.”

And I smiled in response—quietly, with a soft voice.

A few minutes later, we and the other guests went inside.

We ended up sitting in the same row—though there were four people between us.

I tried to glance his way a few times.

I could only see a bit of his side profile,

but that was enough to make me happy.

Time passed, and the event ended.

On the way home, I tried to ride my motorcycle behind his.

But sadly, one of my neighbors ended up between us. Huhu...

Then he turned into the alley that led to his house,

and I continued riding straight toward mine.

And that’s how today ended.

A day full of surprises—totally beyond my expectations.

But still, I’m so, so grateful.

Finally, after all this time admiring Mas Bright from afar,

I actually got to talk to him directly—

and hear his voice up close.

Usually, I only catch his voice faintly from a distance.

But now, I’ll do my best to remember this moment forever—

his eyes,

his face up close,

his voice—so deep and masculine,

his smile,

and... his abs, that V-line,

and his chest muscles...

So, so sexy. So hot. So ughhh...

I’m so in love with it.

Thank you God, for this day.

[justmarcusz]

Part 5

Time kept moving, and I didn’t keep my eyes on him the whole time.

I looked away now and then—toward the trees—so he wouldn’t feel weird if I stared at him too much.

Even though, deep inside, I just wanted to keep looking at him forever.

Oh, and by the way…

He was wearing my favorite shirt of his.

Wait, how is that possible?

Well, Mas Bright has a few shirts he usually wears when he goes out to get feed for the goats.

One of them is this long-sleeved sky blue shirt—with royal blue fuzzy cuffs on the sleeves.

And why is that my favorite?

Because one time, we crossed paths on the road in front of my house—

I had just finished biking, and he was about to go get some grass nearby.

I think I’ve told that story before.

That time, we smiled at each other.

And he looked so much brighter in that shirt.

That’s why it became my favorite—

because when he wears it, he looks especially handsome.

And brighter.

Ughh...

By the way, in the middle of cutting those branches, he suddenly asked me,

“Not working today?”

I answered, “Nope.”

Then he asked again, “Why? Day off?”

I replied, “No… I quit.”

He didn’t say anything after that and just continued trimming the branches.

Inside, I felt a little sad.

Why did he have to ask that?

If it had been anyone else, I probably would’ve been annoyed.

But luckily… it was Mas Bright. Hehehe.

By the way, I’m currently unemployed.

That’s why I’m able to wait for Mas Bright every day like this.

After he finished, he said goodbye to me.

I thanked him,

and he went back home.

Then I sat back down near the chicken coop—smiling like crazy while writing about this moment,

occasionally glancing toward Mas Bright’s backyard.

I could see him through the gaps in his storage shed—

remember, the one made from old, woven bamboo that’s falling apart.

He was taking off his shirt.

Inside, I whispered,

“Oh God, please let me see him shirtless…”

Then he continued feeding his goats.

A few minutes later, he finished and walked back to his house—

and yup, I saw him walking.

Shirtless.

Ugghhhhh. So incredibly hot.

His chest and arm muscles were seriously irresistible.

Ughhh.

Then I quickly went to put the chicks back into their box.

And that was the end of it...

But actually—

it wasn’t.

[justmarcusz]

Part 4

Then my dad came over to give the chickens—his or maybe mine too—a little snack: a cup of rice.

Mas Bright greeted him, “Feeding the chickens again, sir?”

My dad replied, “Yoi!”

They made small talk for a bit, but then my dad walked off because the red ants started biting his feet.

Mas Bright went back to trimming a few more branches.

And again—same thing happened. The red ants swarmed all over him.

At one point, he lifted the bottom of his shirt to shake them off—

and I caught a quick glimpse of his stomach.

And that’s when I realized—he has that V-line on his lower abs.

It was so sexy and... ugh, insanely hot.

I could even see his abs a little—even if it was just for a second.

But still—ugh.

I really loved that moment.

Not because he was suffering from the ant bites, of course—

but because of the little interaction, his smile...

That was what I loved.

I wish I could’ve taken a picture or a video,

but even though I was holding my phone the whole time,

I just couldn’t bring myself to do it.

Like… what would he think of me if I dared to take a picture?

So yeah… that’s that.

Oh, by the way—

before he climbed the tree, or more precisely while we were looking at the fish,

his little son came into my backyard to follow him.

“What are you doing, Dad?” he asked.

I forgot what Mas Bright said in reply,

but then he asked his son,

“Where’s your fishing rod?”

His son answered, “It’s broken. Let me use yours.”

And Mas Bright said, “Mine’s lost.”

Then Mas Bright started climbing the tree,

and his son went back home...

[justmarcusz]

Part 3

After I asked my mom, I went back to tell him.

As I walked toward him, I saw him squatting near the chick pen, reaching out his hand—like he was trying to play with the little chicks.

Adorable, right? Seriously, it was such a sweet sight.

Then I told him that my mom only wanted the jackfruit tree to be trimmed at the top.

“Just the top?” he asked, sounding a bit unsure and surprised.

I replied, “Yeah, that’s what she said.”

He then quickly got up and went to cut the branches.

By the way, the jackfruit tree is across from my yard.

Remember the little ditch that runs between the backyards?

As he was about to cross it, he looked down and said,

“There are a lot of fish in here—and big ones, too.”

I answered, “Yeah.”

Then he asked, “Does anyone fish here?”

(I kinda forgot the exact words, but it was something like that.)

I replied, “Yeah, some people do, but I’ve never seen anyone actually catch any.”

We stood there for a moment, looking down at the water, then he headed off to cut the tree branches...

Then he started climbing the tree—but noticed something.

He said, “There are a lot of red ants, huh?”

I replied, “Yeah.”

He hesitated for a moment, brushing off some of the red ants swarming his hand.

Then he really climbed up and began cutting the top part of the tree.

He looked so bold—and honestly, kinda hot—while climbing that tree.

A few seconds later, he managed to cut the top branch, but quickly climbed down because the red ants were all over him, biting him from his neck to his legs.

He said, “Dang, so many ants—and I just had to cut right where the nest was.”

He said it with a mix of pain and a little laugh.

I replied, “Yeah,” with a slightly awkward smile—because I honestly didn’t know how to react.

Then he tried to get some of the ants off his back and tossed them into the ditch, where the fish instantly gobbled them up.

“Whoa, big fish, right?” he said as he watched them eat the ants.

I answered, “Yeah, they are.”

Then he started trimming the rest of the branches he had already cut down...

[justmarcusz]

Part 2

You won't believe this! But it really happened.

Oh God—thank You so much! I’m beyond happy!!

Okay, let me start from this morning. About an hour after I fed my chickens, I heard the sound of Mas Bright’s motorcycle starting up.

By the way, his motorcycle has a loud exhaust, so I always know when he’s heading out. Yup—he was going out to find food for his goats.

Usually, he’s gone for no more than two hours, but this time it was different.

Every time he leaves, I always wait for him to come back.

But today… he really tested my patience.

Time passed and he still didn’t return. Even after I took a shower, I still hadn’t heard his motorcycle.

He was gone for eight hours—from morning until late afternoon!

I figured maybe he went to visit his mom or a friend.

It was the longest he’s ever been away to gather goat feed.

After I showered, I went to my backyard and sat near the chicken coop, hoping I could see him.

And yes—I saw him. Just a glimpse, through the gaps in the leaves.

Then he walked toward his house and looked in my direction.

A little while later, I saw him again, walking toward the property line.

In my heart, I said, Thank You, God—I can see him clearly.

Then he stopped walking because his little son was tagging along. After that, he headed north.

I thought he was going to collect banana leaves like he did this morning.

But then… surprise.

He had passed the neighbor’s backyard—the one in between our houses—and yup, Mas Bright walked toward me, entering my backyard.

(In my village, there are no fences separating the backyards, so anyone can walk through.)

I had no idea what to say.

But he spoke first.

He asked, “Yesterday your mom asked me to cut down a jackfruit tree—which one is it, and how does she want it trimmed?”

I answered, “Oh, I’m not sure. Let me go ask her first.”

Then I went inside to ask my mom. After that, I came back outside to tell him...

[justmarcusz]

Part 1

This morning, I was feeding my chickens when I heard a sound coming from the leaves in the backyard of Mas Bright’s house. At first, I thought it was a squirrel—since there’s a pair of squirrels that often play and hunt in my backyard.

But then I heard the sound again, and when I turned to look, it was actually Mas Bright. He was cutting leaves for his goats.

I only glanced at him briefly because my dad—who had apparently come back from out of town last night without me knowing—was there too. I didn’t want him to wonder what I was looking at.

A few seconds later, I turned to look again. Mas Bright was inspecting the banana trees, probably choosing some leaves to cut. I managed to look at him for about three seconds before he turned toward the east—which happens to be the back side of my house. So I quickly looked away before getting caught staring.

Moments later, I heard the sound again—he was cutting some banana leaves near the property line. I could see him clearly from the back, and even caught a glimpse of his side profile.

If my dad hadn’t been there, I would’ve stared at him longer—before he turned to another position.

Still, I’m grateful. Always.

[justmarcusz]

So like always, whenever my dad’s out of town, I’m the one who has to take care of our chickens, feeding them, and moving the chicks in and out of the styrofoam box so they stay warm at night, then letting them out in the morning.

Anyway, today when I was about to let the chicks out, I looked over at the backyard of Mas Bright’s house..and OMG, I saw him. He was wearing this white shirt with a marble pattern, and he looked so good. Like, literally brighter. I loved it.

He was standing right at the border between his yard and our neighbor’s backyard. He caught me looking at him for a sec, then looked up at some leaves he wanted to grab for his goats. And me? I quickly got back to business, took the chicks out and popped them into their coop.

Then I went inside, washed my hands, and came back out, hoping to catch another glimpse of him. But sadly, he’d already walked back to his goat pen, so all I got was a view of his back.

Still, I was lowkey grateful, ven if it was just a second. It made me happy, ngl.

And right now, as I’m writing this, I’m literally sitting near the chicken coop, waiting to see him in his backyard again. And guess what? Before I could even finish this story, he appeared! Yep, I saw him again. Just for a second, as usual. But I’m hoping next time I can see him longer, and more clearly.

I’m typing this while sneakily glancing at his backyard from time to time. I just don’t wanna miss him. And I did see him again, hore.

[justmarcusz]

"Dear Mas Bright,

Did you know that every single day, there’s someone, other than your family, who waits and looks forward to seeing you? Just to see your incredibly handsome face. Every time they do, they're totally mesmerized and full of admiration. And that small moment makes their whole day. Did you know that?"

That one is me Mas Bright! Your biggest secret fans, and I'll always be!

I hope you didn't, because when you do, my life will change 180°.

.

.

.

🎵 Vance Joy "Fire and the flood"

[justmarcusz]

This morning, I got a video message from my mom. She sent it to our family group chat. The video was originally from one of our neighbors he made it to show something to my older brother. Then my brother sent it to my mom, and she passed it on to the group chat.

When I watched the video, I was totally surprised and honestly, so happy, because in it, I saw Mas Bright riding his motorcycle and saying hi to my neighbor! I could see him pretty clearly for a few seconds, even though the rest of the clip was kinda washed out by sunlight, so his face wasn’t super clear after that. But still, I kept replaying the part where he was visible.

Thank you, God, for that video. 🙏

Speaking of videos and Mas Bright, I actually have a few more stories related to both. I’ll tell you tomorrow.

[justmarcusz]

The day before yesterday, specifically the last Thursday of May, I went to my sister’s house to hike the mountain behind her home. As we walked and began to climb, we saw someone cutting some branches high up in a tree. My sister greeted him, and when I looked up at the tree... what a surprise! I didn’t expect it to be… yes, the neighbor I’ve admired for so long. The one I’ve told you about before, the handsome man who has a bright aura, that just hits different. Ughhhh

We continued our walk, climbing a few steps before stopping at a junction to wait for my niece and her friends, who were following behind us. While waiting, I could still see him cutting tree branches. Even though it was from a distance and not very clear, I was happy just seeing him.

Turns out, he has a sense of humor! How do I know? Because when my niece and her friends passed below him, he playfully scared them by making ghost sounds. My niece and her friends ran away in fear. My sister and I laughed together watching it, and he also laughed from the tree. Funny, right?

We continued our little adventure that evening, enjoying the beauty of our area from up the mountain... or maybe it was just a hill, I’m not sure, sorry. Time passed as we took in the scenery and watched the sunset, then we made our way back down.

Before I went home, we sat together on my sister’s terrace, chatted a bit, and exchanged photos and videos. By then, the sky had turned dark. I looked toward the road, and coincidentally, he passed by with his wife on a motorcycle. Even in the darkness (with very little light), he still looked handsome..so cool. I was like woooow, completely mesmerized.

And now, I finally know his name, because my sister mentioned it when my niece asked who had pranked them earlier. On the hike, I even came up with a nickname for him, and yep, I found the perfect one.. from now on, I’ll call him “Mas Ss.” It’s the initials of his name (the first and last letters).

As usual, you know my rule, right? If I hope or plan to see someone, it usually doesn’t happen, the chances are very low. But when I’m not thinking about them at all, I end up seeing them. It always happens. It’s like, universal law or something.

That's the video of the sunset I took yesterday.

[justmarcusz]

I totally forgot to tell you about this! It’s the same story like yesterday.... yup, it’s about Mas Bright again.

So yesterday afternoon, I was feeding my chickens. I was in the far back of my backyard, feeding the little ones in their coop. There’s a small canal that runs through the backyard, so we have this tiny bridge over it. After I finished feeding them, I started walking back to the main part of the yard near the house. And just as I was crossing the bridge, out of the corner of my eye, I saw Mas Bright walking toward me through our neighbor’s yard... the one between our houses.

I only saw him for a second because I got sooo nervous, so I pretended not to see him and acted like I was still busy feeding the other chickens. A few seconds later, I turned around and saw him walking along the canal heading north. Turns out he was out looking for grass to feed his goats.

Right behind his backyard, there’s a field with an old fish pond in the middle, totally abandoned, so lots of wild grass grows there. When he walked past me, I didn’t say anything, and he didn’t either. Do you think I seemed rude? I kinda feel guilty about it. I mean, a few weeks ago, we smiled at each other when we ran into each other. I told you about that, remember?

And guys, when I got a quick glimpse of him... he looked sooo young, like a high schooler. And he’s already a dad of two! I swear, he looked so handsome. As he walked along the canal, I lowkey kept watching him. He was barefoot, his feet were clean and bright, like, really well taken care of. I was like, ugh...I can’t!

Because there were a lot of trees, I could only really see his feet at first. But once he got to the fish pond area, I could finally see him clearly, even though it was from far away. He looked lean and just... so nice. And with the golden hour light shining on him...guys, he looked like he was glowing. Handsome, radiant, and sooo masculine. Ughhh.

He went into the pond to pick the grass, and since you have to squat to do that, I couldn’t see him for a while. But every now and then, he stood up to put the grass in his sack...and I was living for those moments, bestie. I just kept watching, minute after minute.

Then, out of nowhere, I heard his goats bleating, probably hungry. I think he heard them too, because he stood up and looked toward the south, where the goat pen is. He stood there for like 30 seconds. I was like, “Hmm… what are you doing, Mas Bright? Just checking on the goats or are you maybe... peeing?” Haha.

It was the perfect moment to stare at him, but I couldn’t do it for too long or he might catch me. So I kept ducking behind a banana tree. Thank God there are banana trees everywhere!

Time passed, and I could only catch glimpses of him when he stood up to toss grass into the sack. Eventually, it started getting late, and I had to head back inside to shower. So, yeah... I let him go for the day. I could’ve waited until he finished and watched him walk back home, but I was like, “Ah, there’s always tomorrow.”

So that’s it for now, bestie.

[justmarcusz]

I think I’m addicted to seeing Mas Bright over and over again. Every day, I wait for him to pass by my house on his way to work. But today… he didn’t show up. I kept wondering, “Where is he?” Later in the afternoon, I prayed to God, asking for a chance to see him, even just for a second. Then I went to my backyard, hoping maybe I’d spot him. But nope, he wasn’t there. I went back a few minutes later while feeding my chickens, still nothing. No sign of him at all. I kept praying, hoping God would give me just one little glimpse… but nada. So, I went back inside. But I wasn’t ready to give up yet. A few minutes later, I went out again. I looked toward Mas Bright’s backyard… and there he was. Yeah, I finally saw him! He was feeding his goats. Even though I could only see him from behind and through the gaps in the leaves and branches, I was so happy. I ended up spying on him for more than 15 minutes. I just kept watching his every move. That’s when I saw a not-so-nice side of him, he hit one of his chickens. I didn’t see it super clearly, but I saw the motion and heard the poor chicken squawk. Honestly, sometimes my chickens drive me crazy too. I’ve had moments where I’ve wanted to hit them out of frustration, but I never actually have. So, I’m not judging him too hard for that. I get it. But anyway, that’s not the main point of this story. I kept watching him as he kept feeding the goats. Then, after like 30 minutes, he walked toward the east side of his yard near the back fence...to cut some banana leaves and branches for the goats. The good thing is, between his yard and mine, there’s our neighbor’s yard, so there’s still some distance between us. And honestly… when he was cutting those branches, I could see him super clearly. Like, really clearly. But that also meant he could see me really clearly too. So, I quickly looked away and pretended I didn’t see him, even though my heart was dying to look at him up close like that. God gave me exactly what I asked for...such a perfect chance to see him clearly...and I chickened out. Ugh, I was so naive. Dear God, if You give me one more chance, I swear I’ll be brave enough to actually look at him. Anyway, I was so nervous my heart was racing like crazy when he walked in my direction and started cutting those branches. After that, he went back to the goat pen and fed the goats some more. I kept watching him until he went into his shed. Oh, by the way, his shed is made of old woven bamboo walls, so there are little gaps that let me see inside, just a little. And then… in that shed… he took off his shirt. Then walked into his house. Yeah, I saw him shirtless, just for a moment, through the leaves and branches of course. I went back inside to take a shower, then came back out to the backyard again, hoping I’d get to see him one more time. Haha, I really am insatiable, huh?

But seriously, I’m so grateful for that moment. I think that was my third time spying on Mas Bright for like 30 minutes straight. Okay, that’s the end of the story!

[justmarcusz]

This afternoon, I was feeling super happy. I was about to take a shower, but before that, I thought I’d check on my chickens. I walked to the very back of the yard to look for one little chick. On the way, I glanced over at Mas Bright’s backyard. I wasn’t expecting to see him, but...bam...there he was, shirtless, feeding his goats. My heart was pounding. I love seeing him like that. Even though I could only see his back, it still made me so happy. Then he started walking toward his house. There were a bunch of things in the way like sheds, trees, branches, and leaves, so I couldn’t really see him clearly. Just a little. Then I noticed him picking some branches, and he climbed up a tree, to cut some branches for his goats. I got all excited again. My heart was beating so fast. I kept watching, but there were so many things in the way that I could only peek at him through the leaves and branches. But honestly, I didn’t mind. The stuff that blocked my view also kept me hidden, so he wouldn’t see me spying. I kept walking around, trying to find a better spot to see him clearly. There wasn’t a perfect place, so I finally took the risk and stepped into a more open area. I could see him better now, but that also meant he could probably see me too. Thankfully, there were some banana trees I used as cover. From there, I could really watch him. I could see his back so clearly. Every now and then, he moved, and I could catch a glimpse of his face from the side. I tried to stay low though, didn’t want to get caught watching. Still, I saw his back, part of his face, and more than just a second of it. Oh my God… he looked amazing. So handsome, strong, sexy. Just wearing blue jeans and no shirt, he looked super manly. Then he climbed down from the tree. I saw more of him now, his chest, his arms, those muscles. Ugh. I want him so bad. I know it’s never gonna happen, so maybe just in my dreams—haha. Thanks, God, for this moment. I’m really grateful.

Honestly, I felt like Joe Goldberg spying on Christian Grey lol.

Psstt i start to use chat GPT to help me for better writing

[justmarcusz]

10 posts!

So far so good

[justmarcusz]

Long time no see. Yeah this is another guy. Who is the guy? This is the first guy I adore, before mas bright and mas resa. I don't have a nickname for him. And today I saw him again, on his work when I passed his place to work, after I visit my sister house. Like two guys before, he's so handsome, and bright, he's wearing red polo. And he has beard, look so good and hot. That's why I adore him, he is just like my type. He's white and bright and handsome. Like mas bright and mas resa. All of them are white Asian guy. Even though they are not white American or European men like my type. But they still got my attention. So here's the story about him :

I know him because I visit my sister house, she have a couch on her terrace, and I always sit there. And he passed my sister house so many times, while I was sit there, because he's my sister's neighbor. And is not only that day, it's almost every single time I visit, but I'm not adore him because of that. So when its started? When my sister village has carnival for celebrating independent day. So basically every villages has some blocks. And every single block must be participate in the carnival, and every citizen in the block should be (kinda must) participate in the Carnival including my sister and him. The women job is dancing and the men job is bringing a big statue, and they gonna parade through the Village. And citizen from other villages participate being audience, including me. That day i saw him among the men from my sister block, only him who is shining bright. He stole my attention. He fascinating me with his looks. Since that day I adore him. And everytime I visit my sister house, I always hope to see him. But you know the rules right? What do I mean by "shining bright" is, he's the only white man in the group, the rest is brown men, and he has a different aura from usual and from the others.

But this time is different, I don't felt the joy, and excited when I saw him, even though I was hopping to see him right before I saw him. Its feels like so so. I don't know.

Who ever read this I hope yo understand.