keyprince-7

[keyprince-7]

Thank you @widdleolpsychic and everyone who got me to 10 reblogs!

Go Home, Gideon!

[It has been a week since Dipper brought Gideon to stay at the Mystery Shack after he ran away from home and after doing favors for Gideon, it's nighttime and Dipper is getting ready for bed in the living room with a blanket in his hand.]

Dipper: I tell ya, Mabel, helping a broken soul really takes it outta you.

Mabel: I hear you, broseph, but at least you're doing something good for Gideon, despite your guys' rivalry.

Dipper: Yeah, I guess so. [Gets on the chair while covering himself with his blanket] I'm bushed, but it's still nice to do good. G'night, Mabel.

Mabel: G'night, bro-bro!

[Dipper and Mabel start sleeping.]

Gideon (voice): Dipper! Can I 'ave a glass o'water?

[Off-screen, Dipper gets up, gets a glass of water, goes upstairs to his room, where Gideon is staying, and turns on the lights.]

Dipper (voice): [Offers glass of water] Here ya go.

Gideon (voice): Thank you.

[Dipper turns off the lights and goes back downstairs to go to sleep.]

Gideon (voice): Dipper, can I 'ave some extra blankets?

[Dipper gets up again, grabs some more blankets, goes back upstairs to his room, and turns on the lights again.]

Dipper (voice): [Gives Gideon the blankets] Here ya go!

[Dipper leaves the room to back downstairs, but leaves the lights on.]

Gideon (voice): Dipper, ya fergot ta turn off the lights!

[Dipper grunts, as he goes back upstairs to turn off the lights.]

Dipper (voice): [Slightly annoyed] Good night! [Turns off the lights]

[Dipper goes back downstairs, but falls down the steps and lands on the floor face first.]

Soos: Uh, dude, ya do realize that Gideon's just takin' advantage of you, right?

Dipper: Soos, I love you, but please shut up!

Soos: Sorry, dude!

Gideon (voice): Dipper! Where's mah lemonade?!

Dipper: Coming, Gideon!

[Dipper goes upstairs while carrying a glass of lemonade.]

Gideon (voice): Dipper! DIPPER! [Dipper enters the room] And why ain't ya in uniform?! [Dipper exits the room and comes back in while wearing a maid's outfit] It's 'bout TIME ya got 'ere!

Dipper: [Trying to keep his calm] Here you go, Your Majesty. [Offers the lemonade]

Gideon: I ain't drinkin' THAT!

Dipper: Why not?

Gideon: Are ya blind or stupid?! Look at it!

[Dipper looks closely at the glass of lemonade and only sees the lemon.]

Dipper: What about it?

Gideon: That lemon has three seeds in it. THAT'S AN ODD NUMBER! I HATE anythin' odd numbered!

Dipper: Fine, I'll just take it out! [Puts his hand into the lemonade to get the lemon out]

Gideon: No! It's already been tainted by the bad lemon! The badness won't leave!

Dipper: That's TWO things in this house that WON'T LEAVE!

Gideon: Then do somethin' 'bout it!

Dipper: [Crushes the glass with his hand and breaking it] Two things that WON'T LEAVE!

Gideon: I changed mah mind. I want soup instead.

Dipper: Okay, don't move! [Leaves the room and then comes back with a bowl of soup while wearing his normal clothes again] Here you go! It's alphabet soup! I made it SPECIAL! [Shows Gideon the soup with words that says "Go Home!"]

Gideon: [Slaps the bowl of soup out of Dipper's hands and cross his arms] Condensed soup from a can?! Disgustin'! Now ya ruined mah appetite! Go fetch me somethin' ta read!

Dipper: Okay, how about THIS?! [Shows a newspaper that says "Lost Dog Returns Home To Family"]

Gideon: [Gasps and slaps the newspaper out of Dipper's hands] Git that outta mah face! I'm allergic ta newsprints!

Dipper: [Chuckles] Ya know, when you swatted that newspaper out of my hands, it reminded me something another kid did, at HOME!

[An alarm clock goes off, blowing Dipper away.]

Gideon: [Clapping his hands] Four O'Clock! Time fer mah stories! Hurry up! They won't hold the show while ya LAZE 'round!

[Dipper brings a TV into the room and gives Gideon a remote control, as Gideon uses the power button to turn on the TV, showing a snake puppet moving while whistling.]

Snake Puppet #2: [Appearing on-screen] Hey, where are ya going?

Snake Puppet #1: I'm going home!

Snake Puppet #2: [Pretending to be shocked] You have a home?

Snake Puppet #1: Why wouldn't I? I'm not some lazy, inconsiderate jerk, who stays in someone else's home.

Snake Puppet #2: Say, where can I get one of these "homes"?

Snake Puppet #1: Oh, everyone has one! [Behind the TV reveals Dipper controlling the two snake puppets while doing voices] Especially if you're fat and have white hair!

Snake Puppet #2: Thanks! I'm gonna go find one, so I can stop [Dipper uses his actual voice while angry] MOOCHING OFF OTHER PEOPLE AND THEY CAN GET BACK WITH THEIR LIVES!

Gideon: [Tries changing the channel] This ain't mah show! Dipper! The remote control's broken! Git over 'n' fix it!

Dipper: [Throws the TV and puppets away and gets on the bed to confront Gideon] I got a better idea! Why don't you watch TV at YOUR HOME?! You know why?! When I wanna do something at HOME, [Pokes Gideon's nose] I make sure I stay at HOME [Pokes Gideon's nose again] to do what I want AT HOME! [Pokes Gideon's nose again]

Gideon: [Narrows his eyes] What're ya sayin'?

[Dipper screams with rage, as he pushes his bed out of the house with Gideon still on the bed and Dipper rushes his way for the Gleeful house.]

Stan: [Watching Dipper push his bed outside] Mabel, what's goin' on?

Mabel: So, Gideon ran away from home after he was accused by Bud of stealing some lucky dime, so Dipper and I brought him in here to stay for a week and then Gideon became his typical spoiled self, driving Dipper crazy and now Dipper is going to the Bud's house to settle this dime issue.

Stan: [Confused] What?

[keyprince-7]

Invisible Fight

[Dipper and Kevin are at the bus stop of Gravity Falls and Dipper is holding a can of Invisible Spray.]

Dipper: Here it is, Kev. The ultimate prank! Invisible Spray!

Kevin: What're we gonna do with it?

Dipper: I got it! We'll spray the park bench and then sit on it! When people walk by, they'll think we're floating on midair!

[They think about their prank, as they're sitting on an invisible bench, surrounded by the townsfolk.]

Pizza Guy: They're floating in midair!

Lazy Susan: How do they do that?

[The thought bubble disappears.]

Kevin: That's the ultimate prank! Good idea, Dip! [Gives a thumbs up]

Dipper: Let's get started!

Kevin: [Takes off his shirt and shorts and throws them on the ground] Okay, I'm ready!

Dipper: Any particular reason you're in your underwear?

Kevin: The Invisible Spray stains clothes, remember?

Dipper: That it does, Kev, that it does! Good thinking! [Gives Kevin the can] Here, hold this for a second. [Takes off his shirt, vest, shorts, and hat] Okay, Kev, gimme the can.

Kevin: Well, I think since spraying the park bench was my idea, I should be the one to spray it!

Dipper: Kev, spraying the park bench was MY idea!

Kevin: Yeah, but I said it was a good idea!

Dipper: Gimme that!

[Dipper grabs the spray can and the boys wrestle over it, but Dipper accidentally sprays their clothes, making them disappear.]

Kevin: Hey, the Invisible Spray works! [A tour bus drives up]

Bus Driver: And to your right, if you look, you'll see two boys in their underwear fighting over a can of paint!

[The passengers laugh, as the bus drives off while Dipper covers his underwear.]

Dipper: Quick, Kev! Help me find our clothes!

[As Dipper is searching for their clothes, Kevin sprays Dipper's right hand, making it disappear.]

Kevin: I gotta HAND it to you, Dipper! You look kinda funny! [Laughs]

Dipper: [Screams, noticing his right hand is gone] Righty! Where are you?! No one messes with Righty! [Grabs the spray can with his invisible hand] We'll see how YOU like it! [Sprays Kevin, making a hole in the middle of his body] Kinda gives you an EMPTY feeling, huh?

Kevin: [Screams while looking at his new hole] Now Marcus and Gus are gonna make fun of me! [Takes the spray can and sprays Dipper's forehead] I can't SEE your birthmark! [Laughs]

Dipper: [Takes back the spray can and spray's Kevin's lower half] No GUTS, no glory! [Laughs]

Bill Cipher: Several bad puns later...

[Dipper and Kevin are now completely invisible while Kevin shakes the can.]

Kevin: Uh, I think it's empty.

Dipper: [Grabs the can and shakes it] No! It can't be! Now how're we gonna pull our ultimate prank?! Thanks a lot, Kev, you used the last of it! [Throws the can away]

Kevin: Hey, I think I found our shorts [Ripping noise is heard] Oops, I think they're yours.

Dipper: Forget the shorts, Kev! Let's go home and wash this paint off.

Kevin: Hey, Dip, do ya know what time it is?

Dipper: Oh, sure, it's...half past invisible.

Kevin: Gee, it's gettin' late.

Dipper: [Noticing Hank] Let's ask this guy. Excuse me, sir, do you know what time it is?

Hank: Oh, sure! [Looks at his watch] It's ten to three.

Dipper: Thank you.

Hank: [Holds out his hand] Don't mention it.

Kevin: Don't mention what?

Hank: Uh, who said that?

Kevin: Me.

Hank: [Screams] GHOSTS! [Hank runs away, as his eyes pop out and his eyes scream as well, as they jump into a car and drive off]

Kevin: Hey, I'm not a ghost! The nerve of that guy and his driving eyeballs!

Dipper: Wait, Kev, my brain hatched an idea!

Kevin: Lemme hear it!

Dipper: Okay, so, we're invisible, right?

Kevin: Yeah, last I checked.

Dipper: If that guy thought we were ghosts, we could haunt everybody in Gravity Falls! THAT'S our ultimate prank!

Dipper and Kevin: WOOO! High five! [The two high five each other]

Dipper: Let's go scare us some suckers!

[keyprince-7]

We Stole A Balloon!

[Dipper and Kevin are walking down in Gravity Falls Park, as Dipper is hunched over and dragging his arms while Kevin is moving the top of his torso and head in a z-direction.]

Dipper: So, what do ya wanna do today?

Kevin: I dunno! What do ya wanna do today?

Dipper: I dunno! What do ya wanna do today?

Kevin: I dunno! What do ya wanna do today?

Dipper: I dunno! What do ya wanna do today?

[The two boys stop moving and Kevin gasps while looking at a balloon stand.]

Kevin: I know what I wanna do today! I need some money! [Kevin digs into his pockets, but doesn't find any money.] I don't have any money! [Leans to Dipper] Dipper! I want a balloon really badly! Really, really badly!

Dipper: Don't worry, Kev! There's lots of money in the First National Bank of Dipper! [Makers a rainbow appear] Follow Me! [Dipper and Kevin ride the rainbow until they land on the ground next to a cauldron that the rainbow was leading into. Dipper picks up the cauldron and tries to dump out contents, but nothing, so he looks closely to find the cauldron empty] Uh-oh! I'm broke too! [Throws the cauldron away] Maybe we can borrow some money from Soos.

Kevin: No, wait! Instead of borrowing the money, why don't we just borrow the balloon?

Dipper: Hey, yeah! Like Lee and Nate!

Kevin: It's just borrowing, right?

Dipper: Yeah and borrowing is okay as long as we give it back, right?

Kevin: Right!

[As the balloon employee is giving a balloon to Shmipper, Dipper whistles while taking a red balloon and both Dipper and Kevin run off with the balloon while laughing.]

Kevin: This is so great! [They stop in downtown Gravity Falls]

Dipper: We're gonna have so much fun! First, we can run with the balloon!

Kevin: Yeah and we can go to the beach with the balloon!

Dipper: Then we can take a bike ride with the balloon! Then go to the movies, the arcade, the ice rink, the pizza shop!

Kevin: And the moon, the sky, and under a car!

Dipper: And the candy shop!

Kevin: My dad's backyard!

Dipper: The mini golf course!

Kevin: And on a boat!

Dipper and Kevin: We love borrowing! [The balloon then pops, making two sullen]

Dipper: It popped. [Both take another look at the popped balloon and then start screaming]

Kevin: How're we gonna return it now, Dipper?!

Dipper: [Picks up the balloon pieces] I got the pieces!

Kevin: [Grabbing some "air"] I got the air!

Dipper: Hurry! Put the pieces on! [Puts the pieces in a balloon shape in the "air", but the balloon pieces fall to the ground] We popped the balloon!

Kevin: Ga-heh!

Dipper: We can't return it!

Kevin: Wha-guh!

Dipper: We're thieves!

Kevin: Hi-yo-hooo!

Dipper: We have to confess!

Kevin: Confess?! Are ya outta your mind?! Do you have ANY idea what they'd do to people like us?! We're not talking about some dumb mail fraud scheme or hijacking here! WE STOLE A BALLOON! They're gonna lock us up forever!

Dipper: You're right! [Covers Kevin's mouth] We've just gotta keep our heads. Just act normal.

[Dipper and Kevin begin speaking gibberish, as Dipper walks in a circle and sticking his tongue out while Kevin flops on the ground and Dipper does the same. Dipper then grabs Kevin's tongue and starts shimmying around. Wendy and Marcus walk by, but stop, as Kevin is crawling while Dipper is jumping in the air while holding his tongue, making the two teens look at each other and back at the two boys.]

Marcus: Uh, what're you two doing?

Wendy: Are you two doing a show or something?

Dipper and Kevin: [Stop acting "normal"] It's not working! [The two scream and run away]

Marcus: Those two are weird.

[Dipper and Kevin keep running, but they hit a balloon cart and see the same balloon employee.]

Balloon Employee: Hi there! [Dipper and Kevin scream and run away, leaving the employee confused] Wait! Don't you boys want a free balloon? It's National Free Balloon Day!

Kevin: He's onto us!

Dipper: It's not safe in Gravity Falls anymore! We've got to move fast and cover our tracks!

Kevin: [Running while carrying a can of red paint and making a line of red paint on the ground] I'm on it, Dip! [The two keep running while Kevin keeps making a line of red paint]

[keyprince-7]

Go Home, Gideon!

[It has been a week since Dipper brought Gideon to stay at the Mystery Shack after he ran away from home and after doing favors for Gideon, it's nighttime and Dipper is getting ready for bed in the living room with a blanket in his hand.]

Dipper: I tell ya, Mabel, helping a broken soul really takes it outta you.

Mabel: I hear you, broseph, but at least you're doing something good for Gideon, despite your guys' rivalry.

Dipper: Yeah, I guess so. [Gets on the chair while covering himself with his blanket] I'm bushed, but it's still nice to do good. G'night, Mabel.

Mabel: G'night, bro-bro!

[Dipper and Mabel start sleeping.]

Gideon (voice): Dipper! Can I 'ave a glass o'water?

[Off-screen, Dipper gets up, gets a glass of water, goes upstairs to his room, where Gideon is staying, and turns on the lights.]

Dipper (voice): [Offers glass of water] Here ya go.

Gideon (voice): Thank you.

[Dipper turns off the lights and goes back downstairs to go to sleep.]

Gideon (voice): Dipper, can I 'ave some extra blankets?

[Dipper gets up again, grabs some more blankets, goes back upstairs to his room, and turns on the lights again.]

Dipper (voice): [Gives Gideon the blankets] Here ya go!

[Dipper leaves the room to back downstairs, but leaves the lights on.]

Gideon (voice): Dipper, ya fergot ta turn off the lights!

[Dipper grunts, as he goes back upstairs to turn off the lights.]

Dipper (voice): [Slightly annoyed] Good night! [Turns off the lights]

[Dipper goes back downstairs, but falls down the steps and lands on the floor face first.]

Soos: Uh, dude, ya do realize that Gideon's just takin' advantage of you, right?

Dipper: Soos, I love you, but please shut up!

Soos: Sorry, dude!

Gideon (voice): Dipper! Where's mah lemonade?!

Dipper: Coming, Gideon!

[Dipper goes upstairs while carrying a glass of lemonade.]

Gideon (voice): Dipper! DIPPER! [Dipper enters the room] And why ain't ya in uniform?! [Dipper exits the room and comes back in while wearing a maid's outfit] It's 'bout TIME ya got 'ere!

Dipper: [Trying to keep his calm] Here you go, Your Majesty. [Offers the lemonade]

Gideon: I ain't drinkin' THAT!

Dipper: Why not?

Gideon: Are ya blind or stupid?! Look at it!

[Dipper looks closely at the glass of lemonade and only sees the lemon.]

Dipper: What about it?

Gideon: That lemon has three seeds in it. THAT'S AN ODD NUMBER! I HATE anythin' odd numbered!

Dipper: Fine, I'll just take it out! [Puts his hand into the lemonade to get the lemon out]

Gideon: No! It's already been tainted by the bad lemon! The badness won't leave!

Dipper: That's TWO things in this house that WON'T LEAVE!

Gideon: Then do somethin' 'bout it!

Dipper: [Crushes the glass with his hand and breaking it] Two things that WON'T LEAVE!

Gideon: I changed mah mind. I want soup instead.

Dipper: Okay, don't move! [Leaves the room and then comes back with a bowl of soup while wearing his normal clothes again] Here you go! It's alphabet soup! I made it SPECIAL! [Shows Gideon the soup with words that says "Go Home!"]

Gideon: [Slaps the bowl of soup out of Dipper's hands and cross his arms] Condensed soup from a can?! Disgustin'! Now ya ruined mah appetite! Go fetch me somethin' ta read!

Dipper: Okay, how about THIS?! [Shows a newspaper that says "Lost Dog Returns Home To Family"]

Gideon: [Gasps and slaps the newspaper out of Dipper's hands] Git that outta mah face! I'm allergic ta newsprints!

Dipper: [Chuckles] Ya know, when you swatted that newspaper out of my hands, it reminded me something another kid did, at HOME!

[An alarm clock goes off, blowing Dipper away.]

Gideon: [Clapping his hands] Four O'Clock! Time fer mah stories! Hurry up! They won't hold the show while ya LAZE 'round!

[Dipper brings a TV into the room and gives Gideon a remote control, as Gideon uses the power button to turn on the TV, showing a snake puppet moving while whistling.]

Snake Puppet #2: [Appearing on-screen] Hey, where are ya going?

Snake Puppet #1: I'm going home!

Snake Puppet #2: [Pretending to be shocked] You have a home?

Snake Puppet #1: Why wouldn't I? I'm not some lazy, inconsiderate jerk, who stays in someone else's home.

Snake Puppet #2: Say, where can I get one of these "homes"?

Snake Puppet #1: Oh, everyone has one! [Behind the TV reveals Dipper controlling the two snake puppets while doing voices] Especially if you're fat and have white hair!

Snake Puppet #2: Thanks! I'm gonna go find one, so I can stop [Dipper uses his actual voice while angry] MOOCHING OFF OTHER PEOPLE AND THEY CAN GET BACK WITH THEIR LIVES!

Gideon: [Tries changing the channel] This ain't mah show! Dipper! The remote control's broken! Git over 'n' fix it!

Dipper: [Throws the TV and puppets away and gets on the bed to confront Gideon] I got a better idea! Why don't you watch TV at YOUR HOME?! You know why?! When I wanna do something at HOME, [Pokes Gideon's nose] I make sure I stay at HOME [Pokes Gideon's nose again] to do what I want AT HOME! [Pokes Gideon's nose again]

Gideon: [Narrows his eyes] What're ya sayin'?

[Dipper screams with rage, as he pushes his bed out of the house with Gideon still on the bed and Dipper rushes his way for the Gleeful house.]

Stan: [Watching Dipper push his bed outside] Mabel, what's goin' on?

Mabel: So, Gideon ran away from home after he was accused by Bud of stealing some lucky dime, so Dipper and I brought him in here to stay for a week and then Gideon became his typical spoiled self, driving Dipper crazy and now Dipper is going to Bud's house to settle this dime issue.

Stan: [Confused] What?

[keyprince-7]

Can I Have Something To Eat?

[As Dipper and Kevin continue to sit around the forest and doing nothing, picnic supplies fall to their location and after everything lands, the two boys emerge from their state of doing nothing and stand up.]

Dipper and Kevin: Praise the Magic Ball! [Victory screech]

[Pacifica stares in shock, as the bug gets up, hits her with a stick and leaves while Dipper and Kevin begin eating and laughing and Pacifica joins them.]

Pacifica: Say, Dipper, that's a lot of food you got there.

Dipper: It's a gift from the Magic Ball.

Pacifica: Everything looks good! Hey, listen, uh, [Laughs] Dip, I... You know, I was just kidding around earlier and I mean, I'm...I'm still part of the club, right? [Dipper eats a cookie and drinking juice] And, after all, the club's gotta stick together and I mean, you know...

Dipper: Paz?

Pacifica: Yeah?

Dipper: Once a member, always a member!

Dipper and Kevin: [Clink their glasses] To the club! [Victory screech]

Pacifica: Yeah [mimics the screech weakly] Now, if you'll excuse me... [Rush for the picnic table] Which should I eat first? The spaghetti? The trukey? The soup?

Dipper: Why don't you ask the Magic Ball, Pacifica?

Pacifica: [Scoffs] Oh, yeah, like that'll ever happen. Right after I consult the Magic Toenail!

[Pacifica prepares to eat, but Dipper and Kevin push the picnic table away from her and block it.]

Dipper: Pacifica! Are you seriously questioning the authority of the Magic Ball? This ball is the one, who gave us this banquet! This copyrighted ball is the cornerstone of this organization!

Kevin: [Whispering] Maybe she's not a member.

Pacifica: [Chuckles] Hey, you guys got it all wrong! I love this, uh, piece of plastic! [Takes the Magic Ball from Dipper] Uh, hello there. Magic Ball, uh, should I have the spaghetti or the turkey?

Magic Ball: Neither.

Pacifica: Oh, then how about the soup?

Magic Ball: I don't think so.

Pacifica: [Becomes annoyed] Can I have anything to eat?

Magic Ball: No.

Pacifica: [Gets angry] No?! What do you mean no?! I'm starving!

Kevin: [Takes the ball from Pacifica] Here, lemme try. Magic Ball, can Pacifica have this yummy, delicious, super-terrific sandwich?

Magic Ball: No.

Kevin: Hmm, can I have this yummy, delicious, super-terrific sandwhich?

Magic Ball: Yes.

Kevin: Awesome! [Vaccuums the sandwich and burps] Sorry, Pacifica.

Pacifica: [Livid while taking the Magic Ball] Give me that! Can I have something to eat?!

Magic Ball: No.

Pacifica: Can I have something to eat?!

Magic Ball: No.

Pacifica: Can I have something to eat?!

Magic Ball: No.

Pacifica: Can't you say anything else but no?!

Magic Ball: Try asking again.

Pacifica: [Hopeful and calm] Can I have something to eat?

Magic Ball: [Sarcastic and insulting] No!

[Pacifica grits her teeth with rage while stammering out of control.]

Dipper: Uh, Paz, are you okay? [Pacifica continues to stammer in rage]

Kevin: Maybe we should ask the ball if she's okay.

[keyprince-7]

Clubhouse

[Pacifica is walking down the streets of Gravity Falls while humming a tune and passing a tall piece of stalk with a treehouse on top with Dipper and Kevin in it and they're giggling.]

Dipper: Wey, wook! It's Wacifica!

Pacifica: [Stops] What?

[Dipper and Kevin continue to laugh.]

Dipper: Wacifica's woing for a walk!

[Dipper and Kevin keep laughing while Pacifica growls.]

Kevin: Where is she woing? Wat the Wravity Falls Wall?

[Dipper and Kevin laugh once more, as Pacifica approaches the stalk.]

Pacifica: What's that supposed to be? Some kind of stupid secret code?

Dipper: We can't tell you 'cause you're not a member of the club.

Pacifica: Oh, yeah? What does it take to be a member? Besides being a loser? [Laughs] Loser... [Laughs again] That's a requirement. [Laughs once more]

Dipper: Sorry, Pacifica, but you couldn't get in, even if you tried!

Pacifica: Well, I'll have you know that the Northwests are members of over twenty exclusive clubs all across this country!

Kevin: [Whispering to Dipper] What'd she say?

Dipper: [Whispering back] I dunno, something about her hair?

Kevin: [Poking his head out the treehouse] Pacifica, you and your hair will definitely NOT fit in!

Pacifica: Oh, what do you two idiots know about fitting in? [Starts climbing up the stalk to reach the treehouse] You should be BEGGING me to join!

Dipper and Kevin: Pacifica! Pacifica, no, no, no! Stop! No, no, no, stop, please please! Stop, Paz! You can't join! You can't join! Can't join! You can't fit in!

[Pacifica grunts, as she tries to get into the treehouse.]

Pacifica: Well, this is stupid! There's no room up here!

Kevin: That's what we've been TRYING to tell you!

Dipper: We've been stuck up here for three days.

Kevin: We told ya you wouldn't fit in!

[Pacifica sneers at the two.]

Dipper: Well, since you're here, Pacifica, we'll give you the club member initiation. Ready, Kev?

Kevin: Ready!

Dipper and Kevin: Welcome to our club! Welcome to our club! Welcome, Pacifica! Welcome, Pacifica! Welcome, Pacifica! Wel...

Pacifica: [Covers their mouths] Shut your stupid pieholes! [Grabs a smaller stalk beside the one holding the treehouse and pulls it while the taller one is bending down] I do not now nor will I ever want to be a member of your stupid club!

[Pacifica reaches the floor, but the smaller stalk snaps while the taller stalk holding the treehouse flings back very fast, causing the treehouse to fly across the sky with the three still inside, as Pacifica screams and they pass Deputy Durland and Sheriff Blubs.]

Durland: Whoa!

Blubs: Make a wish!

Durland: It already came true! [Placing his hand on Blubs' chest]

[keyprince-7]

Snakes and Stairs

[Dipper and Kevin are in the Mystery Shack in Dipper's room while having a board game on the floor.]

Dipper: Man, I'm sure glad your dad told us that the word we've been using was a bad word.

Kevin: Yeah, me too. Classy sophisticates like us should never stain our lips with cursing.

Dipper: Yea, verily. Now, let's play a nice and wholesome game of Snakes and Stairs.

Kevin: Oh, boy! I love this game!

Dipper: [Rolls the dice] Come on! Mabel needs a new pair of shoes! [Throws the dice, which shows snakes]

Kevin: Ooh, snakes. Too bad, Dip. You gotta ride the snakes.

Dipper: Darn. [Moves his game piece to a snake]

Kevin: My turn! [Rolls the dice and throws them, showing stairs] Awesome! Stairs! [Moves his game piece to the stairs] Up, up, up!

Dipper: [Rolls the dice] C'mon, stairs, stairs, stairs. [Throws the dice and sighs] Snakes again.

Kevin: My turn! [Rolls dice and throws them] Stairs!

Dipper: Stairs, stairs, stairs. [Throws the dice] Seriously?! Snakes?!

Kevin: [Rolls dice and throws them] Stairs! [Moves to stairs] Well, this is your last chance, Dip. If you get snakes again, you lose.

Dipper: [Gets frustrated while rolling the dice] Stairs, stairs, stairs! [Throws the dice and they land on stairs] Ha! Finally! Stairs! [The dice turn to snakes]

Kevin: Snakes.

Dipper: AH! [BEEP]

[Realizing what he just said, Dipper covers his mouth while Kevin gasps.]

Kevin: Oooh, you said No. 11!

Dipper: [Babbles for Kevin to understand] I-I didn't mean... You gotta understand, Kev, I was trying... What I meant to say was... Some things slip, ya know? You gotta understand.

Kevin: Don't worry, Dip. I understand. [Pauses] Dad! Dad! Dad! [Runs out the door]

Dipper: [Runs after Kevin] Kevin, wait!

[keyprince-7]

Sentence Enhancers

[It's nighttime in the Mystery Shack and Dipper, Mabel, and Stan are watching a movie on TV, which shows a couple running from a werewolf, which then reveals the credits]

Mabel: That's it? They just leave off a cliffhanger? Just like that?

Dipper: Most movies do that nowadays, which is kinda dumb.

Stan: [Yawning] Okay, ya knuckleheads! It's gettin' late! Time to hit the hay!

Mabel: Last one upstairs is a rotten twin!

Dipper: G'night, Grunkle Stan!

Stan: [Grabs Dipper] Not so fast, kid! I want ya to take out the trash first! [Hands Dipper a bag full of trash]

Dipper: Aw, c'mon, Grunkle Stan! I took out the trash last night! Why can't Mabel do it?

Stan: 'Cause life ain't fair! Now, stop arguing and do it! [Hits Dipper's head with a rolled up newspaper]

[Dipper goes outside to the dumpster while bringing the trash bag.]

Dipper: [Grumbling] Stupid Stan! Making me take out the trash when I did that last night!

[Dipper throws the bag of trash into the dumpster, but then finds some writings on the dumpster.]

Dipper: Dumpster writing? People say it's the voice of the people. "Up with grass! Down with clouds!" [Chuckles] "Gnomes are people too!" Jeff and those Gnomes! Hey, here's one somebody didn't finish: "Robbie smells... Badly." [Writes the word "badly" after "smells" and laughs] Huh? What's this word? Stan is a... What? Stan is a...[BEEP]

Garbage Man: [Disgusted] Hey, kid! Do you kiss your mother with that mouth? [Picks up the garbage bags and leaves]

Dipper: Well, not really...

Kevin: [Off-screen] Hey, garbage man! [Appears on-screen] Hey, Dipper!

Dipper: Hey, Kevin! Um, Kev, do you know what this word means?

[Kevin looks at writings on the dumpster.]

Kevin: "Stan..." Um, isn't he that old smelly uncle you're staying with?

Dipper: No, not that word. [Points at the unseen word] That word.

Kevin: [BEEP] Hey! I think I know what it means! Lee and Nate taught me! They call it a sentence enhancer!

Dipper: Sentence enhancer?

Kevin: You use 'em when you wanna talk fancy! You just gotta sprinkle it over anything you say and BAM! You've got yourself a spicy sentence sandwich!

Dipper: Oh, okay! Lemme try. [Clears throat] Hello, Kevin. Lovely [BEEP] day we're having, isn't it?

Kevin: Why, yes, Dipper! This [BEEP] day is very [BEEP] lovely.

Dipper: How [BEEP] right you are, Kev!

[Dipper and Kevin continue to say the word for a few more times.]

Dipper: Wow, you're right, Kev! My lips are tingling from the spiciness of this conversation!

Kevin: Yeah, mine too!

[Dipper and Kevin laugh.]

Dipper: It tingles when I laugh.

[keyprince-7]

Heavy Package

[The Corduroys continue teaching Gideon how to be a good person and this time, Kevin is carrying a really heavy package and struggling.]

Wendy: Okay, Gideon, Goodness Lesson No. 2: You see someone struggling to carry a heavy package. What do you do?

Gideon: Hello, friend! I see yer havin' trouble with that package! Wouldja like some help?

[Kevin drops the package on Gideon's foot, making him scream in pain.]

Kevin: Oops, sorry. Can I start over? [Picks up the package]

Gideon: I was wonderin' if ya need some...

[Kevin drops the package on Gideon's foot again, making Gideon scream in pain again.]

Kevin: Whoops, let's start again. [Picks up the package again]

Gideon: I'd like ta try 'n'...

[Kevin drops the package on Gideon's foot for the third time and Gideon gets angry.]

Kevin: Oops.

Gideon: [Livid beyond belief, as his face is red with anger] YOU BUTTERFINGERED STUPID GINGER! WHAT'S IN THAT BOX ANYHOW?!

Kevin: Dad's wallets.

[Gideon screams with rage, as he uses his shattered amulet to lift Kevin into the air.]

Kevin: WENDY, QUICKLY! SHOCK HIM!

[Gideon telekinetically slams Kevin to the ground many times, but Wendy presses the button to make Gideon's shock collar go off again and shocks Gideon.]

Gideon: [Being shocked] It...hurts...but it's...worth it...!

[Gideon continues to telekinetically slam Kevin to the ground many times while still being shocked.]

Marcus: [Eating popcorn] This is fun to watch!

[keyprince-7]

That's Not My Wallet

[Wendy and Marcus are in the front yard of Corduroy cabin while Gideon is sitting at a desk.]

Wendy: Okay, Gideon, you ready for your first day of Goodness Class?

Gideon: [Places an apple on his desk] Yes, ma'am!

Wendy: Good! Now, Marc, get your wallet out.

[Marcus sighs while taking his wallet out.]

Wendy: Now, Goodness Lesson No. 1: You see someone dropping their wallet. [Sees that Marcus is still holding his wallet] Drop the wallet, Marc. [Marcus sighs again and throws his wallet on the ground.] Now, what do you do?

Gideon: [Picks up Marcus' wallet and presents it] Excuse me, sir, but I do believe you've dropped yer wallet.

Marcus: [Crosses his arms while smirking] Doesn't look familiar to me.

Wendy: [Rolls her eyes] Here we go.

Gideon: But I saw you dropped it. [Offers the wallet] Here.

Marcus: [Shakes his head in denial] Nope, it's not mine.

Gideon: It is yers. I'm tryin' ta be a good person and return it ta you.

Marcus: [Feigning ignorance] Return what to who?

[Gideon and Wendy facepalm at Marcus' antics, so Gideon takes out a card out of the wallet, revealing an ID card with Marcus' photo on it]

Gideon: Aren'tcha Marcus Corduroy?

Marcus: Yup.

Gideon: And this is yer ID.

Marcus: Yup.

Gideon: I found this ID in this wallet. [Puts the ID card back into the wallet] If that's the case, then this must be yer wallet!

Marcus: That makes sense to me.

Gideon: [Offers the wallet again] Then take it.

Marcus: [Smirks] It's not my wallet.

Gideon: [His face turns red from anger] LISTEN, YOU STUPID GINGER! TAKE THIS WALLET OR I'LL RIP YER ARMS OFF!

[Wendy presses the button, causing Gideon's shock collar to go off, shocking him.]

Wendy: Wrong, Gideon! Good people don't threaten others to rip their arms off!

[The shock collar continues to shock Gideon, as Marcus takes his wallet back.]

Marcus: Thanks for the wallet, stupid pig! [Laughs while walking away]

[keyprince-7]

5 posts!

[keyprince-7]

Cursed Doll and Frogurt

[Wendy and Marcus enter a shop full of strange objects and meet the owner, who is an old man in a red suit.]

Wendy: Hi, do you sell any items around here?

Shop Owner: I sell lots of forbidden objects from places men fear to tread. I also sell frozen yogurt, which I call "Frogurt".

Marcus: Well, we're looking for a good birthday gift for our brother.

Shop Owner: Aah, then perhaps this will please the young lad.

[The shop owner finds a doll of Bill Cipher on the shelf and takes it.]

Shop Owner: Take this object, but beware; it carries a terrible curse.

Marcus: That's kinda bad.

Shop Owner: But it comes with a free Frogurt.

Wendy: That's good.

Shop Owner: The Frogurt is also cursed.

Marcus: That's bad.

Shop Owner: But you get your choice of toppings.

Wendy: That's good.

Shop Owner: The toppings contain potassium benzoate. [Wendy and Marcus look at each other.] That's bad.

Marcus: Can we go now?

[keyprince-7]

That's My Purse

[Gus is walking down the streets of Gravity Falls, but he comes across Gideon, who is walking down his direction.]

Gideon: Well, well, well, if it isn't the stupidest of the Corduroys! Havin' a nice li'l walk, are we?

Gus: Please leave me alone, Gideon. I don't want any trouble.

Gideon: Ooooh, ya don't want trouble? How precious!

[Gideon shoves Gus back a bit, making Gus stumble, but maintains his balance.]

Gus: Stop it, Gideon!

Gideon: Or what? What're YOU gonna do 'bout it, ginger boy?!

[Gideon continues to shove Gus back.]

Gus: I'm serious! Stop it!

Gideon: [Mocking Gus] I'm serious! Stop it! Ya don't have the guts to stand up to me!

[Gideon keeps shoving Gus, making him very angry.]

Gus: That's my purse! I DON'T KNOW YOU!

Gideon: [Confused] Wait, what?

[Without warning, Gus kicks Gideon in the groin, making Gideon shout in pain while holding his groin and kneeling to the ground.]

Gideon: Ooof! That hurt! I'm gonna tell my father 'bout this!

Gus: Don't mess with me next time, Gleeful!

[keyprince-7]

Kevin and Gus Play Yahtzee

[Kevin and Gus are in the living room of the cabin and they both have the game of Yahtzee on the floor.]

Kevin: Okay, Gus, so we roll the dice and we both have to shout "Yahtzee" really loud.

Gus: At the same time?

Kevin: Yeah and you also have to flap your arms while shouting it.

Gus: You're gonna do that too?

Kevin: Yup, that's how it's done.

Gus: Okay!

[Kevin puts the dice into the red tube, as he's ready to shake it.]

Kevin: Ready, bro?

Gus: You'll shout "Yahtzee" with me, right?

Kevin: Oh, yeah.

[Kevin shakes the tube and rolls the dice and throws them to the ground.]

Gus: [Flaps his arms.] YAHTZEE!

Kevin: Gay.

Gus: You suck, Kevin!

[keyprince-7]

Bud Gleeful's Steamed Hams

[Preston rings the Gleeful's doorbell. Bud opens the door]

Preston: Well, Bud, I made it, despite your directions.

Bud: Well, Preston Northwest! What a delight! Welcome! I hope yer prepared for an unforgettable luncheon!

Preston: Eh...

[Pretson enters the Gleeful house. In the dining room, he sits at the table and places a bottle in an ice bucket while Bud runs into the kitchen, only to find his roast burnt and gasps in horror.]

Bud: Oh, crud! My roast is ruined!

[Preston's knocking on the kitchen door can be heard, as Bud looks at Greasy's Diner not too far from his window.]

Bud: Hmm, what if I were to purchase some fast food and disguise it as my own cookin'? Delightfully devilish!

[Bud begins to climb through the kitchen window, but Preston enters the kitchen and catches Bud trying to leave.]

Preston: Uh-!

Bud: Preston! I was just...uh... stretchin' my calves on the windowsill. Isometric exercise! Care to join me?

[Smoke can be seen coming out of the Gleeful's oven.]

Preston: Why is there smoke coming out of your oven, Bud?

Bud: Uh...oh! That ain't smoke! It's steam! Steam from the steamed clams we're havin'!

[Once a suspicious Preston leaves the kitchen, Bud breathes a sigh of relief, climbs out the window, and runs across the street to Greasy's Diner, where he buys burgers and fries to replace his burnt roast. The scene cuts to the dining room, where Bud comes from the kitchen with the burgers and fries on a silver tray.]

Bud: Preston, I hope yer ready fer mouthwaterin' burgers!

Preston: I thought we were having steamed clams?

Bud: No, no! I said "steamed hams"! That's what I call burger.

Preston: You call burgers "steamed hams"?

Bud: Yes, it's a regional dialect.

Preston: Uh-huh. Eh, what region?

Bud: Upstate New York.

Preston: Really? I've been to New York during one of my business trips and I've never heard anyone use the phrase "steamed hams".

Bud: Oh, it's an Albany expression.

Preston: I see.

[Preston takes a bite out of a burger and chews a little while Bud sips his drink.]

Preston: You know, these burgers are quite similar to the ones they have at Greasy's Diner.

Bud: Oh, no! Patented Gleeful Burgers! Ol' family recipe.

Preston: For steamed hams?

Bud: Yes.

Preston: So, you call them steamed hams, despite the fact they're obviously grilled.

[Sizzling from the kitchen can be heard.]

Bud: Uh... Y'know, the... One thing I should... Pardon me fer one second.

Preston: Of course.

[Bud rushes to the kitchen upon seeing it's now on fire. Bud returns to the dining room and pretends to yawn.]

Bud: Well, that was wonderful. A good time was had by all. I'm pooped.

Preston: Yes, I suppose I should be... GOOD LORD! WHAT IS HAPPENING IN THERE?!

Bud: Uh, Aurora Borealis?

Preston: AURORA BOREALIS?! AT THIS TIME OF YEAR, AT THIS TIME OF DAY, IN THIS PART OF THE COUNTRY, LOCALIZED ENTIRELY WITHIN YOUR KITCHEN?!

Bud: Yes!

Preston: May I see it?

Bud: ...No.

[The two exit the house, as the fire in the kitchen grows larger.]

Gideon (voice): FATHER! THE HOUSE IS ON FIRE!

Bud: No, Son! It's just the Northern Lights!

Preston: Well, Bud, you're an odd fellow, but I must say, you steam a good ham.

[As Preston turns to leave, Gideon screams for help, causing Preston to look back towards the Gleeful house. Bud gives a thumbs up and a fake smile, causing Preston to keep walking away. Once Preston is out of sight, Bud rushes back into the house to deal with the fire.]

Gideon (voice): HELP! HELP!

[keyprince-7]

Fatso: "Hey Fleshie! Possession's 9/10ths the law and you're all mine!"

[keyprince-7]

The trio stumbled across this influencer while he was filming a TikTok and didn't hesitate to scare the fleshy before diving into his hot bod!