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Quest - Bruce Brainard , 2024.

American , b. 1962 -

Oil on canvas , 40 x 40 cm.

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Some orks fight for the goblin tribes in the scrapsteppes, since not all orks are of course as obsessed with keeping the goblins below them, they only care about fighting for the strongest boss that will lead them to the bestest fights, even if it isnt an ork.

This is Gnargtof's Mob

Gnargtof themselves earned their fame and ork followers when they returned to their camp after a days long abscence with a massive bone. They claim to have taken it from the finger of a massive monster that they choked to death themselves. Despite the trophies size, some orks later began to question if that story maybe wasnt quite true and Gnargtof maybe just found it after getting lost after a recent raid for a bit. By now Gnargtof has a significant band of loyal orks behind them though and nobody dares to question them.

Tuggnogg is the best bloodbowl player in his tribe and came close to leading his own warband once. His true dream though, is to ride a battlewagon one day. Sadly he has failed his drivers test for it several times so far because he just keeps getting left and right confused. He joined Gnargtof after they promised to finance any new attempts of his.

Borbal loved his squig, he fed it only the best scraps of humie meat and the tastiest mushrooms he could find. He made a saddle for it with his own hands with stolen rubber tires from the boss's personal warwagon, he loved riding it into battle. And then? The beast ran off the second he turned around to inspect some dead humies shiny armour! He is now always on the lookout for his missing squig, hoping to ride again with it across the steppes one day.

Dat Git is only remarkable in how unremarkable they are, other orks cant even remember their real name. Dat Git likes fighting and yelling and has nothing really interesting going on with them, but they still make a good friend for raiding settlements together.

Krugtoff loves chess, a game about fighting another tribe, you can carry around and play everywhere? Incredible that humies can come up with something as fun as that! Since other orks cant muster up the patience to play chess and not just throw the pieces around, whenever they get the chance, Krugtoff take captives and makes them play chess for their freedom. To the humans surprise, Krugtoff actually understands the rules perfectly and is really capable. So far he has gone undefeated, if you manage to be a challenge however, they let you live and treat you okay, since good opponents are difficult to find.

Togg isnt the brightest, even by ork standards, he prefers using clubs, since he often holds blades the wrong way around and it frustrates him. This one he made from the parts of some wrecked looking ork trukk. Its good for hitting stuff he says.

Takrakk wasnt a particularly religious ork, he liked to fight and the roar of loud guns as much as any ork and thought that was enough to appease the ork gods. That all changed however one fateful day, when a goblin shaman showed up out of nothing in his dwelling and handed him his stick. The shaman told him that he will win every fight he has, as long as he carries his stick, but the day the stick breaks, will be the day he dies. The shaman vanished without a trace and changed Takrakks life forever, he became obsessed with rituals and warchants to please the gods before every battle, he chooses his opponents carefully and tries to only do things that are extra orky, like making sure to never shoot an enemy unless right in front of him. So far his stick hasnt broken and he did win every battle, but who knows if the gods will be with him forever.

Kurgol Toggrof was on their best way to becoming a proper mek. They had just finished their first trukk and wanted to proudly show it to their mekboss to finally get the title of a real mek, but disaster struck! The trukk didnt work, someone stole vital parts for the engine! Embarassed, Kurgol was kicked out of the mek workshop, they now have nothing left but to pick up their chainsaw and hunt for the ork who ruined their life, will they ever find that one?

Boltuff loves shooting big guns. The weight, the sounds, the kickback. But there was one big issue, he never hit anything. After a long time of frustration trying to learn what aiming is from some goblins, he came to the conclusion that aming is entirely not orky and the only solution was to trust the ork gods that his shots will find the right target. For that reason he welded a big metal sheet on his helmet to blind him in battle, he just lets another ork tell him the direction the enemies are and fires away. Eerily, Boltuff hits far more targets than any other ork in his tribe by far.

Gnurl Deffclog might be the only ork ever to exist with an interest in ork history. He remembers every big battle between orks, goblins and humans of the last year, an impressive feat for an ork and he even painted the names of many of the last big bosses of his tribe on metal sheets in his hideout, he cant remember the order they ruled in though. His clothes are also replicas of the armour worn by the great Ghazkulls first warband, how he managed to know what they looked like is a mystery though. He is currently trying to get the other orks interested in historical reenactment.

Thats all of them, i hope i can get myself to post some minis more regularly, i dont know if im gonna come up with a good backstory for every ork i paint though :p

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Morgen Linke wählen damit Gysi seine unbegrenzte Redezeit bekommt und dann hört er bis 2029 einfach gar nicht mehr auf und es gibt gar keine Koalition

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The Dakkahaula, the mightiest warmachine in the largest goblin tribe of the Scrapsteppes was designed and ordered to be built by Dakkarukk Bosstrampla, the most powerful goblin alive at the time. It was built right after Dakkarukk unified the squabbling small tribes and warbands of goblins in the inhospitable and barren wastes of the southern steppes and started their campaign to free all goblins from ork slavery. It serves as a rallying point for the goblin hordes in battle as well as an effigy to the ingenuity and strength of firepower that gives the goblins a fighting chance against their ork-oppressors. In battle it towers over hordes of goblins and smaller warmachines, its cluster of firepower always offering loud barrages in time to drown out the war chants of ork warbands and its rockets always giving explosive support to the goblins own warcries during their fight for freedom.

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Andrei Tarkovsky, Cats, Polaroid

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NO WAY

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crochet snail 🧶

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Howl truly is the man of all time. He’s a playboy. He’s a malewife. He fell in love with a ninety year old woman. He’s a rugby player. He smells like hyacinths. He’s not a natural blond. When dying his hair went slightly wrong, he filled his home with slime. He has a PhD. He’s a wizard. He found a way to another universe and he told absolutely nobody about it. He makes video games about the magical universe for his nephews. He can’t play the guitar. He always takes a guitar with him when he’s trying to seduce a woman. He’s a self-proclaimed coward. He got drunk to trick himself into doing something dangerous. He overcharges for his services to rich people. He undercharges for his services to poor people. A woman invaded his home and declared herself his cleaning lady and he just let her stay. He loves spiders. He lies about his surname to everyone, including royalty. The true spelling of his first name is Howell, but we don’t find out until halfway through the book because the POV character thinks it’s spelled Howl. He’s even Welsh.

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Illustration from Cat Tales from Many Lands by Daty Healy, 1932.

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happy neil banging out the tunes day!

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french fries

French fries (via Instagram)

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Here is Shroommasta the goblinwitch! She uses her knowledge of mushroom cultivation to grow powerful mushs that allow her to cast her spells and even travel between realms, although the results are not always exactly as planned.

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To be trans is to change for the better.

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