kore-b

[kore-b]

Beatrice learns to hate numbers.

She learns a lot during the moment Ava goes into the portal. Because she knows exactly how long Ava has been… Missing? Gone? Lost? The only answer she has, the only answer her hands can grasp, are numbers.

Fourteen minutes. Fourteen minutes for every second that passes in this world. That calculates to 2.3 years for every day that passes in this world. Reya not only takes Ava away from her, she takes years away from them .

Time doesn’t move as quickly where Beatrice is. No, it slogs and scrapes its feet on the floor. She replays every mistake, every misstep, and every word left unsaid. The only perspective that grounds her, that reminds her of the mission  and of her duty is one nagging thought: Ava has it worse.

Ava has it worse.

So Beatrice can put aside her hauntings, her regrets, and focus on saving Ava. To protect her. To love her.

She knows she has it good— relatively. Mother Superion’s scars have healed. She’s feeling physically better than she has in years. The pain in Camila’s neck has subsided ever since Adriel was taken by the Tarasks. Yasmine has been throwing herself into her studies, and taking a leadership position. The remaining OCS chapter is still intact.

But what Beatrice doesn’t know is a full night’s sleep. The last time she got any shut eye was back when she was in bed with Ava. What she’d give for one more night next to her. While Ava has been gone for two days…

Years . Years. Years. Years. 4.6 Years.

While Ava has been gone for two days on this planet, Beatrice has been awake for almost three. Any fleeting moments she does get in slumber are filled with nightmares. But her waking hours are no different. It’s just that the nightmare isn’t filled with demons and fighting. It’s filled with silence and an empty portal.

Beatrice doesn’t know what it felt like to not have an aching pain in her back. She wonders if this is how Ava feels with the Halo. Her soreness isn’t as justified, just awkward resting places.

The OCS tried supplying her with a full bed and mattress, but Beatrice refused. She can’t sleep soundly when she knows Ava is somewhere out there. Alone? Battling? Suffering? Camila forces Beatrice to accept the sleeping bag, with its minimal support against the cold hard pavement.

Yes, she hasn’t moved. Neither has the portal. 

For this first time in her life, Beatrice yells at Mother Superion when she suggests they rebuild it at Cat’s Cradle. The numbers ring in her head. Even if the portal was offline for one hour, that would mean fourteen hours in Reya’s realm. That would mean 840 minutes Ava could burst through that portal with 840 attempts to no avail.

Leaving isn’t an option. Not like it was for Ava. But Beatrice tries not to think about that. She only thinks about Ava coming back home.

So Beatrice has made a routine. She has called for shifts monitoring the portal because after 72 hours of being completely awake, the team forced her to plan out a sleep schedule. 

Beatrice hates numbers. They keep her up at night. Everything keeps her up at night. Her thoughts of what Ava might be doing, could be thinking, crying out for help. 

So what’s a couple more late nights? Beatrice can’t think losing sleep is comparable to  Ava losing years. So she sits. Alert, aware, and in position.

The days don’t change much. Whispered questions by her friends, worried nudges, unspoken moments sitting next to her. She misses the life she could’ve had if they won.

There is no winning with a missing Ava.

But everything changes in a stroke of electricity. The room fills with a bright blue. Everyone’s eyes reflect flashes and sparks. The portal rumbles back to life. 

It spits out a small body, flings it to the ground, and shuts off. 

Beatrice is moving before her mind commands her feet to start running. Her shoes collide with the body on the ground. It makes an impact, it makes sound. It makes it real. 

Ava is back.

Ava is in a heap on the floor with blood running down the side of her forehead.

Ava is back.

Ava’s chest rises and falls in stuttered motion, like the journey through the gate knocked the wind out of her. 

Ava is back.

And Beatrice stops counting.

[kore-b]

https://archiveofourown.org/works/49428337

Mary is alive. No one knew until Lilith was able to track her down after the fight with Adriel. She is alive but injured. They know who did it. Vincent.

Lilith and Camila are the ones who look for her, Mother Superion gave them the permission to use one of the vans, Lilith is the one driving as Camila tries her best to stay calm and contain her emotion, after everything that happened just some hours ago she feels guilty at being happy about something, but she misses Mary and she can't wait to see her again.

They arrive to the place, it's an abandoned and completely destroyed building, perfect to hide. Camila gets out of the van quickly and goes inside, Lilith following behind her as she makes her claws appear, just in case it was needed; it takes them some time to find their friend, the only reason they found her was because Mary let out a groan of pain. She looks like shit .

She's still in the same clothes she was when she saved their lives. Except now she's covered in blood almost completely. Blood on her face. Hands. Clothes. Boots. It's intimidating, but Camila and Lilith ignore all the blood and get close to her. Mary stares at both of them, but it looks like she doesn't recognize them, this causes Camila to panic, she can't lose anyone else; "Mary, it's us, Camila and Lilith", Lilith says in a soft tone, Camila had never heard her talking so soft to anyone, but it makes sense she would talk like that given the circumstances they were in, Mary seems to relax when she recognizes the voice. She struggles to get up and struggles even more to stand up, leaning on Lilith to stay up and not fall.

Camila stares at Mary to try and see how injured she is, but it's useless in this state, her clothes are covering her whole body and there is no injury she can see like this. She guesses she's injured somewhere on her stomach by the way she's covering it with her free arm, she decides that she will check it out once they're in the van or when they get to Cat's Cradle, the first thing they need to do is get her in the van. Lilith is careful and slow, taking short steps as she tries her best to get Mary into the van safely, it takes time but they eventually get her there, Lilith goes back to the front as Camila stays on the back with Mary. She notices how bad Mary's state is and decides that she will look at her injuries at Cat's Cradle.

The whole ride is silent. The only sound are Mary's groans of pain.

"She didn't make it, did she?", Mary asks after some silent moments, they know who she's talking about, and they know that she knows the answer. But they don't say it. Lilith's hands grip the steering wheel with more strength, her knuckles turning white. Mary lowers her head and looks at her hands with dry blood on them; she knows who's fault it is, she knows who caused all of this, she knows who they have to blame. She can't even say his name. Vincent.

Mary can feel the anger slowly returning to her, waiting to explode, waiting to act. She will let it happen.

The van gets silent once more and it stays that way until they get to Cat's Cradle; Mary seems a bit better, she had gotten some rest in the ride and it seemed to be enough for a little while. She still needs Lilith's help to get out and walk, Camila is the one who carries Mary's guns.

They slowly make their way into the place, getting some stares from the Sisters inside, they can't blame them when Mary is covered in dust and blood that they don't know if its hers or someone else's, it does look like a look Mary would have, but the shock of it happening after months without knowing her location is understandable. The walk is slow and Lilith makes sure Mary doesn't try too much or too hard to walk, everything seems fine until Mary sees him .

Vincent is talking to Mother Superion, it seems normal but they can all feel how mad Mother Superion is, they can't blame her, everyone feels the same about him. Mary sees red , she can't walk well yet she walks up to him slowly, Mother Superion gasps when she sees Mary and hugs her without thinking, happy to see one of her girls returning home, Mary hugs her back tenderly, knowing how much it meant to her to know that one of her girls was alive after what happened; she allows the hug to last as long as Mother Superion needs it to last, which is at least some minutes, but Mary doesn't mind. The smile the older woman gives her makes her forget about everything that happened to her in the last months.

But when she sees him , and he is looking at her like he did nothing wrong, she can't stop the anger from bursting out.

"What the fuck is he doing here?", she asks, clearly mad, everyone stays silent at the big contrast of her personality in the span of two seconds, "Well, he helped us in this fight", Mother Superion comments, she can't be upset at Mary's tone because she knows that Mary wasn't there in the fight and doesn't know what happened. "Lilith, why didn't you kill him?", she questions without looking at her, her eyes focused on the son of a bitch that was standing in front of her, Lilith says what Vincent already knows, "I wouldn't take that pleasure from you", she replies, Mary smirks and it makes Camila shiver a bit. She has never seen Mary like this.

Vincent starts to walk away to avoid conflicts. Mary won't let him.

_-_-_

I wrote this fic some days ago and thought it'd be good idea to post it here so more people know about it and read it :)

[kore-b]

I used to envy the birds when I woke up because I heard them singing and they are so full of life so early in the day, then I remember that I'm full of life too, because I wake up and I pet my dog who sleeps next to me and I kiss my teddy bear good morning and eventually I get out of bed, and maybe that's proof enough that I am full of life. maybe that's proof enough that I am alive

[kore-b]

so I just finished a fanfic that took me more than two weeks to finish, it's 37,793 words long and it absolutely destroyed me, so yeah if you guys want the link lemme know, or you can also search it on AO3 it's called "It doesn't hurt to dream, right?"- so yeah-

[kore-b]

one of my favorites scenes in warrior nun is definitely the one when Ava runs, because it feels like it has a deep meaning but the meaning is so simple. When Ava runs is like, so many emotions in just one place in just one moment, that scene has a lot in it yet the meaning is SO SIMPLE because it's literally "I'm alive"

Like Ava is feeling a lot, happiness, emotion, excitement, and more, but in the end is all the same, she feels alive and it's just so beautiful I can't

[kore-b]

no because this is so true, but also, y'know that Taylor swift's song labyrinth? the part that says the 3 Oh i think is so powerful here. For instance we have the first oh, that is "oh oh I'm falling in love" and it represents the realization of ava being in love with bea, like finally knowing/accepting her feelings, then the second one "oh no I'm falling in love" that I think represents the fear ava could feel, the halo bearer gets hurt so it's obvious that everyone close to them will get hurt too, and she's scared of that. And the third one, "oh I'm falling in love" that happens when she breathes out is simply that, that fact of her loving bea, that sigh that she lets out is her loving being in love with bea, ignoring the fear that it may cause her. In that moment, she simply loves bea. And is so beautiful because you can even see her smile after those few seconds, it's the only Oh I've ever seen and I'm glad it was acted so beautifully

Alba, the woman that you are, you’ve done it. you’ve created the best moment in television history. this is it. it peaked right here. because hand to god i’ve never seen the Oh acted out before my eyes until this moment. and I fear I never will again