kreftropod - Tumblr blog

kreftropod · 8 hours ago

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The other night husband and I were watching a documentary about the yeti where they were doing DNA analysis of samples of supposed yeti fur, and every one of them came back as bears.

Anyway, the next night we watched a thing about some pig man who is supposed to live in Vermont. People said it had claws and a pig nose but walked upright like a man. Now, I happen to know that sideshows used to shave bears and present them as pig men. So every piece of evidence they gave of this monster sounds to me like a bear with mange.

So now the running joke in our house is that everything is bears. Aliens? Bears. Loch Ness monster? Bear. Every cryptozoological mystery is just a very crafty bear.

Bears. They’re everywhere. Be wary. Anyone or anything could be a bear.

#the ancient texts #it's all bears

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kreftropod · 2 days ago

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#sdfghjklö #autism

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kreftropod · 2 days ago

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I’d like to live through a week that’s not a whole new verse of “We Didn’t Start the Fire.”

#hhhhyeah #current events #just... all of the events #the entire world needs to go sit in the time-out corner for a bit

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kreftropod · 3 days ago

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The good plot twists aren't the ones that are wild left turns out of nowhere, they're the ones that make all the other little things that didn't quite add up before suddenly click

#yes! this!#plot twists should be foreshadowed #and some of the best ones are foreshadowed in a way that makes total sense in hindsight and on a second reading #plot twists

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kreftropod · 3 days ago

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if you're posting a whole fanfiction to tumblr you've got to put it under a readmore boss

#fandom #long text posts - regardless of content - Will gett scrolled past by a lot of people #so for your own sake if nothing else - use the read more function

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kreftropod · 4 days ago

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It is your sworn duty, when you're in your 30's, to do something every day that would have gotten you viciously bullied in high school.

#went to an amusement park with my cousin and her kid the other day #and the kid is that age now where adults start being embarrassing #it was thus my duty to be The embarrassing adult and get on the pretty horse on the merry go round which is obviously a Not Cool ride #embracing my cringe #and should the kid want to do something silly he can do it with me #and get a free ''I only did it for my embarrassing relative's sake'' card to pull to avoid the shame of doing something silly

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kreftropod · 4 days ago

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Pros of kissing Lae'zel: More space for the single nose you've got squished between you.

Cons of kissing Lae'zel: Accidentally covering her flat nostrils with your fleshy nose so she can't breathe.

#guaranteed not the first to think of this but sharing the thought anyway for the Lae'zel smoochers out there <3 #bg3 #bg3 lae'zel #lae'zel #baldur's gate 3 #kreft rambles #ignore me. I'm drawing noses being squished and thought about Lae's lack of nose and now I need to draw her as well

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kreftropod · 4 days ago

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compilation

#hhhhh yeah #autism #in my teens I described feeling like I was living in a grey soap bubble separated from the colours of everyone else's world outside #I knew something was off and that I felt separated from everyone around me. struggling to connect the way I saw them do #and then 15 years later I was told I had autism like ah... yea that explains a lot lol #would have been nice to know before developing permanent disabilities from stress and mental health issues but it is what it is :')#gif

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kreftropod · 5 days ago

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Someone you know could be fighting a battle you could never imagine. For example, they could be a Wheel of Time fan

#wot #wheel of time #save wot #been trying (failing) to get friends to read the books for 20+ years please let the show live so we can get our friends to Watch and join us

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kreftropod · 5 days ago

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#fuck ai #fuck gen ai #I hate it with every fiber and cell and aspect of my body #got reminded they use chat gpt at one of my parent's jobs and had to fight the impulse to get into a longwinded argument about it #just the mention of so called professionals using gen ai while at the same time removing jobs from actual human beings to save money #makes me so angry I want to throw up #my parent thankfully isn't the one using it - some colleagues are - but parent still thinks it's a Cool and Smart program #and I just want to strangle everyone responsible for ever making gen ai the monster it is

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kreftropod · 5 days ago

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Sometimes it feels like you've lived your whole life in a house that's always a little bit on fire. Like it's usually just in one room and you make sure to wet the walls around it so it doesn't spread and that usually works. You were expected to take more responsibility over fire containment when you were like seven because it's not like you can expect your parents to always be 100% on guard about making sure the whole house doesn't catch fire, and you figure that's just how things are like.

And sometimes as a kid you visit your friends' homes and some of then whisper to you - grimacing with embarrassment - about how they're not supposed to tell anyone this, but there's a whole room in their house that's currently on fire. And you're like yeah it's ok I'm not supposed to tell people about the way our house is a little bit on fire all the time, too. And then you visit some other friend's house and there's no trace of fire anywhere, and you think "wow, these people are really good at hiding their house fire."

And one day you show up to work like "hey sorry I'm late, I forgot to wet the walls before going to bed last night and my whole house burned down", and you're startled by the way people react, acting like that must be the worst thing that has ever happened to you. And you're just like "chill, it's been years since the last time this happened, and it wasn't even that bad this time", and that just makes people more shocked, acting like that's the weirdest and most concerning thing they've ever heard anyone say, which only confuses you more.

And then someone tries to explain to you that people aren't supposed to have an ongoing house fire. Most people actually never experience a house fire in their lives. Like not even once. Not even a little bit. The normal amount of having your house be currently on fire is zero.

#hhhh #oh same

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kreftropod · 5 days ago

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mold pisses me off so much

oh you have to eat your produce the moment it leaves the store or the fuckin Hungering Dust will get it. and. poison your food

#received a whole lot of strawberries from my parents due to midsummer happening #and apologies to future me but I Need to eat these berries Right Now #or the Hungry Poison Dust will establish a colony in my fridge if I so much as look away for a few hours #man I love strawberries. don't love that I can't keep a bunch of fresh ones around for longer than a day or two or risk The Mold #they got a better shelf life than raspberries though. those suckers start molding the moment you even think about looking away

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kreftropod · 5 days ago

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theres bikes around the city you can rent but you have to use an app that needs your drivers license. theres buses that drive right to your destination, but if you dont have change you need the app. you can wash your car here if you sign into the app. you can go to the bathroom here you just have to unlock it with the app that needs your location on. you can order at this restaurant if you scan the code and download the app. im losing my freaking mind

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kreftropod · 5 days ago

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what i imagine when somebody says they're eating my art