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How to get into the head of "one VERY unlikable character"

How to get into the head of “one VERY unlikable character”

The support from this writing community has been wonderful from the start.

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The Call to Love our Enemies Exposes our Hearts

The Call to Love our Enemies Exposes our Hearts

You may be familiar with the story of the ‘Good Samaritan’, the one about the good guy who helps his enemy by rescuing his beaten up and bloodied body out of the gutter and paying for his recovery. Do you know the backstory to this story, the brackets before and after, and the reason why Jesus told it in the first place?

See there was this ‘Expert in Religious Law’ asking Jesus what he must do to…

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Daily Devotionals

I have a new phone, the screen is bigger than I think is absolutely necessary but I’ve discovered it’s going to be great for blogging!

One of the apps I’ve downloaded is called Solid Joys – a daily devotional. I’ve not used it before as I was familiar with Daily Bread but I have enjoyed the Desiring God Facebook page and found it thought provoking -faith inspiring.

Here is today’s word from John…

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Chopin’s Sock-turn When Mrs Chopin does the washing she inspires her husband because behind every great man is a woman doing boring stuff.

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Feeling a bit stoopid

Feeling a bit stoopid

I will lift up my eyes…help!

I think I may have bought a website by mistake.

When you were little, did your friends call you a brain surgeon when you did something really clever? Well my Dad wasa brain surgeon, he genuinely was a Smart Alec because his name was Alec. Right now I think I must have either been adopted or my dad was actually Winnie-the-Pooh because I’m frustrating myself with my own…

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The 'Wonder Years'

The ‘Wonder Years’

They say that the Wonder Years are the ages between six and twelve, I have no idea why they have that name, but suspect it’s something to do with the utter wonder, delight and relief we parents experience when our children are that age. We have survived the misery of the baby and toddler in-the-trenches years and are utterly oblivious to the full-on-warfare teenage years.

Or maybe it could mean…

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How they increased Design School's traffic to 1 million visits [and download the templates they used to do it] – Design School (for Canva)

How they increased Design School’s traffic to 1 million visits [and download the templates they used to do it] – Design School (for Canva)

A long article by Design School for Canva but if you are wanting to turn your blog into a business you need to read this. Filled with valuable information on article structure, editorial consistency and auditing for SEO optimisation, you’ll have to keep this to read again and again!

Here is their example of an editorial checklist which helps structure article consistency:

Keeping the number of…

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If you are not a blogger it’s possible you may not know what bloggers do exactly. If you are a blogger, that’s equally possible. (Or is that just me?) There’s one thing I’ve noticed that seems to be the common trend amongst my fellow blog people, is that we all want to learn more about this invisible world and very few are where they would like to be but most are passionate about what they do and just about all are very supportive of one another.

Spurred on by a generous helping of my fellow bloggers with a side dish of personal angst I am starting a new series of interviews with other bloggers on what it means to be SUCCESSFUL. Success means a million different things to everyone and in the blogging world one may be tempted to measured by numbers (stats, followers, income). While analysing data in order to strategise your business marketing budget is wise, numbers are not a true measure of your blog’s worth.

It’s a bad idea to draw comparisons and become disheartened by what others seem to have achieved, what’s more important is to determine the reason why you blog, what your goals are for the future and what you need to learn/improve on in order to achieve them.

Some bloggers write simply because they love it or they wish to inspire and encourage others, some are authors who are blogging to showcase their books, others blog as a full time occupation and earn an income from their work. What makes each individual get up every morning and want to write? Every interviewee will be different and as we catch a glimpse of the person behind the image I hope you will be inspired by their stories.

The aim of  this series is to help you re-evaluate why you do what you do, teach you some new tips as well as motivate you to focus on your own goals. Because we could all do with a bit of help now and then!

If you’d like to be featured in this series, please feel free to e-mail me or leave a comment below. I’d love to hear from you, don’t be shy! 🙂

So, ladies and gentlemen, without further ado, I’d love you to put your hands together and welcome my first guest:

Debbie Stansil

It’s my mission to show women who feel stuck in a rut that it’s not too late to chase the dream. I want to show them that they CAN succeed, no matter how little confidence they may have right now.

Through my helpful guides and motivational posts, my readers will come to see that they DO deserve success, they ARE good enough and they WILL make it

How do you define a ‘successful’ blogger?

For me, a successful blogger is someone who knows what they want from their blogs, and how to get it, whatever it might be. It doesn’t necessarily mean a lot of money or fame – it could be just knowing that one post helped one person.

What were your reasons for setting up a blog? 

I’d been toying with the idea for a while. I mainly jumped in because I wanted to develop my writing style and put my words out there because I wanted to write a novel and my writing was rusty to say the least.

Initially, I planned on blogging for a few weeks and then closing it down. Two and a half years later, I’m still blogging and now I just can’t imagine not blogging.

What is the purpose of your blog now?

Although I talk about a wide range of subjects on my blog, my main focus is showing other people that they can live their dream.

For a long time, I wanted to be a writer, and last October, I quit my day job to become a full time writer. It wasn’t until after I was making a good, full time income from writing, that I learned it’s “impossible” to write for a living successfully.

It made me see that nothing is impossible if you’re willing to put the work in, and I want to share that with others. It frustrates me that people are being put off following their dreams because of other people’s negativity.

All of the people you see saying it’s impossible? They haven’t put the work in.

Debbie’s Blogging Journey

I started my blog in March 2015, although it was a fair few months before I got serious about it. I didn’t even have a Twitter account for the first month!

Once I realised how much blogging had grabbed me, I made the decision to go self-hosted and I made the leap in November 2015. Since then, my blog has been re-branded and become more focused.

I still wouldn’t like to label myself as a one category only blog – although many people blog successfully in a really tight niche, it’s not me. I know I would get bored only ever talking about one thing, and if I’m bored, then surely my readers would be too.

The way I see it, my blog’s niche is me, my voice, my take on things, and everyone is their own blog’s niche.

Blogging is a steep learning curve and I’ve made more than a few mistakes along the way:

I once decided to play with my blog’s CSS code with no idea what I was doing. I lost posts, images and the layout was awful. I hadn’t thought to back up anything, or even take a screen shot of what the code looked like before I changed it. It took me a long time and a lot of curse words to get it back to normal, but those posts where lost forever.

I once submitted my blog for a review. Amongst other things, the main feedback was “good strong writing but the theming is awful”. Rather than focusing on the good, because the writing is surely what it’s all about, I fixated on the awful theming. I almost shut the blog down, thinking I wasn’t cut out for it. I calmed down and saw that actually, that comment was spot on. My theming at the time had a very cartoonish feel about it and it wasn’t right for the things I was talking about. It turned out to be the best thing anyone could have said to me and I rebranded everything.

Something I’ve always struggled with, and still do, is that I can’t go “all in” on my blog. I would love to be able to dedicate the thirty plus hours a week it deserves to it, but it’s just not going to happen. I have bills to pay and although I do write for a living, my main income doesn’t come from my blog and I’m not sure I’d ever want it to. I have to prioritise, and writing my novels is always going to come first. I’ve made my peace with that for the most part, but sometimes I still get frustrated about it.

But the good by far outweighs the struggles. Some high points for me have been:

Hitting one hundred Twitter followers. I don’t think it matters how many followers I have now, or will have in the future, the feeling of hitting that first goal was out of this world.

The moment I held a physical copy of my first novel in my hands. I’ve now got six books out and each one makes me excited, but again, nothing beats that feeling that came from the very first one.

Writing controversial posts and just waiting for the backlash, only to find that the vast majority of people commenting either agreed with me, or voiced their different opinions in a civil manner. I’m happy to debate things, I enjoy seeing the other side of arguments, but when it degenerates into name calling and all of that ridiculousness, I just can’t be bothered with it.

I know it sounds cheesy, but blogging has truly changed my life. I can say with 100% certainty, that without starting my blog, I would still be stuck working for someone else in a job I liked but didn’t love.

Instead, because of my blog, I am writing for a living. My blog gave me the confidence to put myself out there with both my own books and as a freelance ghost writer.

I have a definite five-year plan – there are lots of little milestones along the way, but the main goal for me is to be making a good income from my own books to the extent that I can concentrate fully on my own projects and step away from the freelancing.

So there you have it; living your dream is possible – I’m the living proof of that. Work hard, and keep going through the low points and the rejections. It will all be worth it in the end.

Debbie has kindly shared a helpful post on her blog on growing a following on Facebook: Grow Your Facebook Page: 4 Simple Steps to Go from 0-1000 Followers in 4 Weeks.

Debbie’s Bio:

Born in 1982 in North East England, Debbie knew from an early age she wanted to be a writer. Life got in the way, and the dream was put on the back burner, although never forgotten. She am now a full time author and freelance writer and writes her own blog, My Random Musings. She has published two novels, two short story collections, a non-fiction book and a collection of funny poems.

Links: Blog   Twitter  Facebook  Instagram  Amazon Author Page

  Don’t forget to e-mail me with your story now 🙂 !

The Successful Blogger Series If you are not a blogger it's possible you may not know what bloggers do exactly. If you…

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My husband actually THROWS the 'throw'

My husband actually THROWS the ‘throw’

bad throw

Some less than perfect household tips for less than perfect ladies On ordering your world when everyone ignores your orders:

Firstly – the people: I once invited a stylish friend, Mabel*, over for a cuppa chai latte. (I have introduced you to her already when I briefly spoke about her cleavagelast time). I tell you it was terrible, never again!  As soon as she left I stripped our shabby…

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Behold the Wonder of a Book Nook — Parent Co. I LOVE these ideas, I'll be making one of them tomorrow with a mosquito net and cushions for the kiddos.

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How to Help Kids Create a Culture of Personal Accountability — Parent Co. 'spilling water is normal, but cleaning the mess up is also normal'. Here is some gentle and sensible advice on enabling our children to become mature and considerate adults.

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Or ‘My Button Keeps Popping off My Pants and other Sad Stories’

I am fortunate to have been pretty much the same shape and size my whole adult life but now I have bumped into a bit of a mental hurdle and I’m literally clambering over it to the next dress size up. It hasn’t been a good dayyear trying to pretend my trousers still fit around my waist.

In talking about what you should not eat – ie dieting – has your body shape ever been compared to a piece of food? For example ‘apple’, ‘pear’, or if you’re VERY unusual, ‘inverted carrot’. (I made the last one up – it applies to the male physique). Terribly bad luck if you’re over in the cake category, like nobody loves to have a ‘muffin-top’  do they? But at least muffins are kinda cute and tasty! OOH, imagine being shaped like a koeksuster (if you are not south african, they look like this:)

They are so utterly sticky syrupy and delicious that they are the best thing to eat if ‘cake shaped’ is what you aspire towards.

I think my shape could probably be called ‘broad bean’, no, not just one bean on it’s own, but a little line of them in the pod. From the front I’m more or less straight (well I used to be) but from a different angle I’m full of irregular bumps.

I wouldn’t mind if the bumps that are meant to be bigger are actually bigger than those that are meant to be smaller but sadly my breasts are slowly being out-bumped by my tummy. I am fully blaming my tiny bosom size. In fact the word bosom could hardly ever refer to me. As my youngest daughter says, I have no ‘line’ running down between my ‘girls’.

When I was an impressionable, self conscious teenager, they were referred to as ‘mosquito bites’ by my nearest and dearest. So you see, I have no pride in my top deck area, only disdain and to be absolutely perfectly honestly frank (I have NOT admitted this before) I think I may suffer from breast envy (I’m blushing now!)  

And for that reason, I NEVER make remarks about my three girls’ body shapes that is in anyway disparaging.

But the truth is, although I’m approaching middle age and am spreading a bit around the middle, I am just plain lucky with my shape – it’s all in my jeans apparently (?). They say you grow to become the shape you inherit and it’s very little to do with your diet or exercise regime. (Unless you are eating platefuls designed for more than one person at a time while lying on the couch – honestly you need to be a little sensible and self-examining and hence I will be upping my fitness programme and not taking that extra biscuit anymore).

And so this brings me to the nutshell of my food discourse. I have to reveal another kernel of truth (apart from my breast reveal), I am so SICK to DEATH of these incessant food fads and silly diets in our Western culture because of the way they convince us to buy ‘healthier’ when it’s those who are promoting the ‘diets’ who benefit.

I’m angry because I grew up in a country where people are starving and are only too thankful to have anything to eat. How dare anyone suggest to the poverty stricken that ‘organic/paleo/xyz free’ is the way to shop? How have we lost perspective on eating? How have we become so obsessed with food that we spend billions on wasting it while billions of our brothers and sisters are dying for lack of it?

In April we were driving through South Africa and stopped off in a one horse town where the horse was probably eaten already – all that was left were a few scraggly goats wandering the main road. Three small boys, the age of my own kids, dressed in rags you or I would have thrown away five years ago, came to me asking for food. They were shuffling in their weakness and I cried afterwards when we drove away.  I had given them the picnic we hadn’t eaten and they carefully shared it fairly amongst themselves. I was upset by the injustice and suffering though and resolved to always travel with food to give away.

KODAK Digital Still Camera

Back home in our neat and pristine European environment I can’t help but wonder. It is one thing to have to eat certain foods for serious health reasons – like illness or allergy – but perLEASE, why is the space allocated to the ‘gluten free’ section in the supermarket FAR larger than the percentage of people in the world who actually are allergic to gluten? Is this just a fad, making money for the supermarket?!!

So I think it’s time for a health change in our culture, we need to be healthy in our exercise and eating HABITS. How about we obsessed less about what we eat, spend less time eating for a start and spend more time acting on what other people need to eat?

‘broad bean’ and other edible body shapes…? Or 'My Button Keeps Popping off My Pants and other Sad Stories' I am fortunate to have been pretty much the same shape and size my whole adult life but now I have bumped into a bit of a mental hurdle and I'm literally clambering over it to the next dress size up.

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Sunday Sentence #2

‘Who do you say I am?’ – Jesus

Christ’s Son-of-God status humiliated through His Son-of-man sacrifice opened the way for us to have a heavenly future worth more than any earthly thing.

The big question is, what is your answer to His question?

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The Cinderella Complex – Waiting For Mr. Write : Women Writers, Women’s Books Here's a great article by Evie Gaughan on not putting off writing just because it's not 'good enough' yet.

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A Beginner's Guide to Creating an Email List for Free

A Beginner’s Guide to Creating an Email List for Free

A wealth of very valuable information here from Steve:

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How to get FILTHY RICH on the INTERNET in 7 EASY peasy steps:

How to get FILTHY RICH on the INTERNET in 7 EASY peasy steps:

filthy rich on the internet?

This is INSANE you JAW will LITERALLY hit the FLOOR!

You gonna wanna read this because it’s FREE information backed by RESEARCH.

And you have to read to the end of this post so that you don’t miss the one SECRET that few people share which is YOUR ticket to success!

Making money as a blogger is easy, just look at all the people who are.

And here are my SEVEN easy tips:

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Sunday Sentence #1