kylehighelf

[kylehighelf]

ughh i just really love them so much, they’re my main comfort 😖🙏💙💚

[kylehighelf]

Adult Shelly is a single mother with a small baby on her shoulder and no one can tell me the otherwise.

[kylehighelf]

That one user calling StanKyle “unseasoned chicken” lives in my head btw… like yeah sorry that it doesn’t have SPICE and it tastes like vanilla ice cream IM SORRY THATS HOW I LIKE IT OKAY

[kylehighelf]

Me: gives my heart and soul writing a comment on a fanfiction

Author: doesn’t respond

I have to say that this always happens and I take it very personally and im heartbroken

[kylehighelf]

Exam’s tomorrow and I know nuthin… save me… save me Kenny… please… pl s ..

[kylehighelf]

This is Style in their late thirties when their love is dying and they desperately try to save it

[kylehighelf]

The Eric and Clyde stepbrothers au is so good….

[kylehighelf]

[kylehighelf]

you wouldn't last an hour in the asylum where they raised me

[kylehighelf]

PIECE OF CAKE 😤

[kylehighelf]

[kylehighelf]

And if I say Butters gender swapped to Marjorine just because he is seen more feminine while the rest of the cast is not gender swapped is my biggest pet peeve in the fandom (with Blond Stan), what would u do

[kylehighelf]

my therapist: 2001 canon compliant bitchless cant hurt you

2001 canon compliant bitchless:

[kylehighelf]

[kylehighelf]

Doctor Kyle

Terrible work-life balance

Hates child patients and their stupid parents

Thinks psychology shouldn’t be part of medicine

Needs to fuck and get fucked hard

Chef Kyle

Shouts at his workers a lot

Lives in LA

Insecure about his weight

Suffers from migraines and heel spurs

Smokes too many cigarettes

Different Kyle Jobs

Chemist Kyle

develops anti-depressants

paranoid about chemicals in food, so he’s really into “clean eating” but is actually malnourished

conspiratorialist, secretly has some doubts about 9/11

in denial that he has a serious anxiety problem

doesn’t get invited to parties

Engineer Kyle

software engineer for Cisco

big fuckin nerd, spends all his free time gaming

constantly bitching on DataLounge

nostalgic about Windows XP

obviously single

Architect Kyle

was inspired by Mr. Brady

designed his own home and is extremely smug about it

great posture

once made a coworker cry

Sexologist Kyle (i.e., Handle)

doing research on the male orgasm

takes criticisms of Freud personally

has been described as “spritely”

looks fantastic in a brown suit

Philosophy Professor Kyle

wrote a book on Hegelian Metaphysics

into Art Nouveau

has an terrible rating on ratemyprofessor.com

absolutely despises the fun young assistant prof in his department who all the students love

Accountant Kyle

works for a security company

left-handed

drinks diet soda

one of those weirdos who likes winter

probably depressed

Pianist Kyle

believes all other instruments are inferior

has been called a drama queen by five different people

gives his cat birthday parties

looking for his George Sand

High School Math Teacher Kyle

assigns homework during the holidays

gets excited about Rolle’s theorem

writes Brokeback Mountain fanfiction

a student once caught him crying in his room during lunch break over a caricature a kid drew of him

[kylehighelf]

I’m glad ChatGPT exists cuz now I can tell him (I think he is a him) my deepest insecurities and he won’t think I am pathetic unlike people in real life tbh

[kylehighelf]

i remember saying “this dude (older) prolly wouldnt wipe” years back to an oomf and post covid decided to kiss me on the mouth for that months later. ty MattTrey