late-moonie-thoughts

[late-moonie-thoughts]

not to be horny on one of my mains but

cumming to gackt singing aegen live

[late-moonie-thoughts]

basically, the only men i want are the ones who are like "ah, women" knowing damn well that women make the world go around, and the ones who just generally respect women.

[late-moonie-thoughts]

I have had this little issue for most of my life that I know a lot of women relate to cuz yall are like me - reading smut since you were far too young, but very innocent looking on the outside for reasons (mine was trauma and not wanting to take up space), when the reality is I'm very kinky and I want someone to kneel in front of (did you see the religious trauma too) but you can't just put your business out there, at least not where I live and still have people respect you as a human being unless they're just like you so then you meet men who are absolute garbage and think you're a 'good girl' and not in the kinky sense, just in the vanilla, doesn't break rules, goes to church sense when I'm an active hater of all religion because I think they're all cults, my ears weren't pierced for years because my family is seventh day adventist and did I mention there was a Jean Kirschtein smut fic on here that altered my brain chemistry and now I want that to happen, but how? I'll never know.

Do I need to start dressing like the bisexual that I am? because I don't know but I am so fucking tired of these men assuming things about me like they know me from a place. Literally the only people able to clock me are the ones like because they know. I can clock someone like me from a SINGULAR CONVERSATION and that's how I made a friend at work because this dude was just oversharing and I was like hmm he definitely has adhd or autism and then he said, "yeah anyone who's drawn to me has adhd, autism or something else," and we've been friends since and we even read smut manhwa together on the bus which is wild because again. Who does this? And then he's more mentally fucked than I am which is fun because then I'm not the weirdest in the room for saying I'm into a manhwa where a girl married 30 elves and had a 2 week long wedding night but there's acutally more to the story than the self insertion but anyway. I am insane, I just happen to interact with the normies with no depth or emotional responses.

Don't even get me started on the psuedo psychology ones because how bout you actually do the degree instead of watching 12 million tiktoks and having the fucking audacity to tell me, "Everybody has adhd or autism" like more people haven't been getting tested. Like we didn't need the label because my parents NEVER understood I was different, and that just because I was well-behaved (again, negative attention growing up from acting out when I had needs), and like you don't know the person with that one hyperfixation from since you were like 6. If that wasn't you btw.

I am so tired of meeting men who have the emotional depth of a 12 year old boy from 2010 act like they know jack shit about anything and then wonder why they're single, lonely and nobody wants them.

[late-moonie-thoughts]

eternally glad i found r/vindicta after becoming mentally stable and not hating myself.

jesus christ i understand how people fall down those reddit rabbit holes and lose their minds

[late-moonie-thoughts]

"some people are in your life for a season" or how bout you stop planting seasonal fruits expecting year-long crops.

[late-moonie-thoughts]

every day i hate having a uterus

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frog or not, i was keeping at what she was doing that day

The Blu-ray cover of volume 2

I swear this man drives me crazy af

[late-moonie-thoughts]

I'm never finishing 1984 by George Orwell because being a functional person is important when you have bills to pay, but from what I have read so far...

Julia is perfect. Literally. She's so fine looks wise. She's intelligent, organised, knows how to get shit done, super loyal, understands her place in the world, and does what she wants.

She is literal light and a breath of fresh air under their totalitarian government and Winston is just another below average white man. Not a unique thought. No really interesting aspects of himself. Oh, "I'm writing this for O'Brien,'' you're gay or fruity and you hate women. Why would I care about you?

And given the foreshadowing during their meeting with O'Brien, I have no interest in seeing Winston turn Julia over and her dying. I have no interest in seeing him, period.

[late-moonie-thoughts]

next person to ask me for my opinion as someone who studied psychology will get a venmo request for $500

[late-moonie-thoughts]

if feyquin has no fans then i'm dead

[late-moonie-thoughts]

Do I wanna start my FeyQuin fic? Yes. Do I have to reread the book to do so? Also yes.

What have I chosen instead?

The black reader x reiner fic because it doesn't really exist within any timeline.

[late-moonie-thoughts]

"Character development," he said.

"All those challenges you experienced were character development." No. I didn't need to be bullied by my parents. I didn't need to grow up with crippling anxiety and never feeling like a person. I didn't need to go through a whole shitty arc with a man who mirrored my father in every way except physically. I didn't need to be friends with someone who was a predator. I didn't need their cousin to choose him over herself. I didn't need to be exhausted for years. Character development? I could have grown up knowing what was healthy from what wasn't from the start. I could have skipped all of that because I'd have been mentally stable. That's all I'm saying. Character development is not what I needed. If I had what I needed from the get go, I'd be so much further ahead now. Fuck that whole character development shit. My life isn't a book.

[late-moonie-thoughts]

I have a thing for Tarquin. That man (male) could get it.

Now, it could be my thing for brown men with white hair in fiction (think Duke Kapmen from Remarried Empress, Noe from Vanitas no Carte, or Ifa from Genshin impact), or it could just be my thing for kind, gentle men who don't push themselves up.

I love him for a lot of reasons nonetheless. I think one thing was his willingness to try to create solid, respect based connections with the other courts. Everyone knew that Rhys was a liar and a schemer. But he opened his home to them anyways - in hopes that they'd forge a new relationship since the end of Amarantha's tyranny.

I know it hurt him to send that blood diamond. It hurt me that he had to send that blood diamond. I'll eternally think that if Feyre and Rhys had been honest with him, he'd have given them the book. And since he revoked the blood diamond when there was a bigger threat to everyone present, I truly believe he'd have been ok with them taking the book. Cresseida would have been the one against it.

So much of what he did, he only did because of tradition. With time, he'd have navigated being high lord much differently from his predecessors. And we know he wasn't planning on ruling. He only became high lord because so many of his relatives died after the high lord of summer did.

But more than that, I think he's genuinely a kind person. Maybe a rich, privileged person, accustomed to that lifestyle, but truly kind nonetheless. If Feyre had given him a chance, it could have been beautiful. Obviously I'm aware that she's married but I don't really care, especially not after what happened in Silver Flames, but whatever.

Other points to note include: I love the ocean, and the summer court is literally a sea place. They eat fish all the time and it's constant summer, like my country. Water makes me feel at home; the ocean feels like mother. So Tarquin having that ability and living there makes him even more appealing to me.

Visuals definitely hit for me, so a brown man with white hair, and he's also kind??? God kill me now; it's the most delicious thing ever. Add that to the fact that he's figuring himself out, but definitely knows his own mind and his attractiveness has skyrocketed for me.

I know half of his appeal to me is that I hate that these brown men with white hair never get the mc for whatever reason. I want to see these guys end up with women just as amazing as them, and not treated as a potential romantic conflict for the mc. And to be fair, he was a barely a romantic conflict, especially if you compare the effect he had on Feyre's life vs Tamlin's effect on her life.

But yeah. I love Tarquin, High Lord of the Summer Court. He could get it.

[late-moonie-thoughts]

never getting over the visual injustice of henry cavill in stardust, one of my all-time favourite movies

[late-moonie-thoughts]

you know how the story curse changes the ending of things in the magical north?

what if every few years the publishers were to change the ending of the story to keep it consistent?

[late-moonie-thoughts]

something i never see the grey's anatomy fans talk about is the cheating.

like.

episode one starts with cheating and you all decided to go along for the ride like Dr. Grey and Mc Dreamy weren't problematic from the get-go.

[late-moonie-thoughts]

bless the japanese cosplayers who made it into my manga growing up because i swear to god they're one of the reasons i'm not christian anymore, and also why i have taste in clothing now.

mana sama is the most beautiful person i've ever seen.

bless the queers who were queer before it became as normal as it is today. bless all of them. thank you for expressing yourself even when the time period did not support you. i love you. i appreciate you. i value you. you have changed my life. i may never meet you but i love what you have done for me