leechboy2 - Tumblr blog

[leechboy2]

Something I've been trying to articulate to myself for a while here, but I wish there were more discussion about the particular experiences of trans men who are attracted to men. Especially the way that it relates to our experiences before coming out and during transition.

A lot of the conversations I see online and in academia focus on the experiences and overlap between trans men and butch lesbians, which is just not a narrative that resonates with me. There has been no point in my life at which I identified as a lesbian, or even as particularly attracted to women in general (something something sexuality is complicated). And it is only recently that I've really been able to let myself jive with being a butch man.

So, what did that experience look like for me?

It looked like trying desperately to perform the right kind of femininity so that straight guys would be attracted to me. Admittedly, it was a "not like other girls" sort of femininity, but I suspect a lot of trans guys and straight women will understand me when I say that this particular kind of femininity is still... very constricting. You gotta be "tough" of course, and have the right sorts of interests, and not care too much about your looks, but at the end of the day still be pretty, not too loud, and pretty willing to give ground for straight men to feel cool. You absolutely cannot be butch, because butch is for lesbians, and you want to be attractive to men.

And then I came out, and now I was a man, so I was free of all of that, right? Right?

Well, turns out there's a whole lot to unpack and unlearn there, and doing that takes a long time. For the first several years of my transition, I was still stuck in this mindset of needing to adhere to all the same constraints I had been under before. The guy I was dating at the time didn't help with this, and I almost said that's another story, but it isn't. The fact that I was willing to keep dating a guy who wanted me to stay pretty and feminine, who told me that body hair was gross, and who in a thousand other little ways made it very clear that I would only stay lovable if I stayed feminine... the fact that I was ok with that, it says a lot about where my mind was at.

I'm sure that a lot of lesbians can relate to some of this, and yet. Becoming who I am, genuinely relaxing into myself and unfolding in the way that I needed to, that process was undeniably and indelibly marked by my experiences as someone who has always been attracted to and wanted to attract men.

[leechboy2]

Waitwaitwait

Is “transandrobabies” really another term people are trying out to deride trans men and mascs speaking on our oppression?

Really?

When one of the things we constantly talk about is that we are infantilized to hell and back?

Actually?

I am… y’know. I wish I could say I was surprised. But at this point I’m not. This is not what genuine criticism of transmasc theory looks like, it’s not ever done a good job being dressed up to pretend that way, and the people coming up with these terms of derision absolutely know what they’re doing.

[leechboy2]

undersea animals when a whale dies

[leechboy2]

PLEASE READ!!! I DON'T POST STUFF LIKE THIS AND THIS IS SERIOUS TO ME! ELON MUSK IS TRYING TO DUMP THOUSANDS OF GALLONS OF WASTE WATER INTO THE LAGUNA MADRE IN SOUTH TEXAS!!!

The Laguna Madre is a beautiful ecosystem that houses so many species of wild life and many migratory species of shore birds go there to eat and rest. Its all thanks to the sea grass that grows there, and after the big freeze of Texas in 2021, it is slowly making its recovery and now it's in danger again!

(Black Skimmer with chicks shown here)

If Elon continues with this disguising act, nitrogen and hydrogen rich waste will be dumped and plankton and algae will begin to overpopulate and create a cloud of themselves over the sea grass causing it to not get the sunlight it needs to photosynthesize. It will basically be suffocated by the overpopulation of microorganisms and die out and so many species of animals will lose that shelter they need to feed, breed and even escape dangers like predators. This grass also feeds the endangered green sea turtle and was even given the name "Turtle Grass" for its huge importance to these creatures.

(Green Sea Turtle grazing) Not only that, but the South Padre Island is one of the largest ports in America and has many shrimping and fishing companies that rely on the environment to make a minimum wage. And once the water gets polluted, so many people can get sick or worse if they eat the fish and shrimp that have been exposed to it!

(South Texas Shrimping Boats) This is serious! And if you or someone you know lives in Texas there is a way you can make a comment and state how you DON'T WANT LITERAL SLUDGE IN THE OCEAN! IT WILL HURT THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE AND ANIMALS AND THE VAST AND DIVERSE ECOSYTEM THEY LIVE IN!

You can find the link here:

PLEASE DO WHAT YOU CAN! WE CAN'T LET MUSK DO THIS!!!

[leechboy2]

"You got vampire lore wrong in your story because real vampires do this and that" Buddy I have terrible news about all of vampires. Heartbreaking news. Worst news you're gonna hear all day.

[leechboy2]

This is so good. The stylisation, the design, the personality.. im like.. augh, yes

witches from the class of 1978 ✨

[leechboy2]

Just here to beg for recs so like please

[leechboy2]

Theyre adorable 💕

School days<3

[leechboy2]

[leechboy2]

buzzed

marlene lasted about a week before using a hair growth potion while remus…let’s just say he was more motivated to commit to the bit…

(also new but she’s a cheerleader! chapter) (loving the subliminal messages i leave in my wednesday posts lmao)

close ups!

[leechboy2]

So I was doing a study of 90’s Damon Albarn and realised that with a few changes he basically makes a perfect Remus Lupin

[leechboy2]

how supervisors look at you when you remind them labor laws exist

[leechboy2]

🐺🐶

[leechboy2]

[leechboy2]

[leechboy2]

Reading atyd was a mistake