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[lloydfrontera]

if you aren't best friends with your lover and a little bit in love with all your friends than what's the fucking point

[lloydfrontera]

love a character that's like. i survived (<- not a brag) (<- this is a curse that weighs on me every waking hour)

[lloydfrontera]

Chapter 217: What the Queen Carries (1)

Huff? Huff!

Deep breath. Breath in. Breath out. Take a step forward, syncing your breath. Run. Like a gust of wind, the night air brushed his ears. Yes, Lloyd was running at full speed. He was trying to escape.

Dammit. Is this really happening?

Lloyd felt disgusted as he jumped over a waist-high patch of grass. Seriously, completion ceremonies were the problem. It didn't matter if it was perfect, lavish, or grand. Something bad always happened during completion ceremonies.

This is such an uncreative cliche!

Gnashing his teeth, Lloyd threw a glance behind his shoulder, and he saw a towering gray silhouette under the dark night sky. It was the giant dragon skeleton, Bone Dragon. And it was going berserk, making a wordless, mana-charged roar and sweeping the whole area with its long tail and neck. The sight of its bony wings spread out was even eerier, and it was fluttering like a spiderweb engraved into the night sky.

Seriously, how did this happen?

That was the dragon skeleton without a doubt. The queen had said that it was a spoil she had acquired after suppressing the remnants of the warlock. And so, he was even promised a piece of the dragon's tailbone after the construction was over.

Dammit!

At this rate, the whole capital was on the verge of being destroyed. But despite such a predicament, Lloyd didn't feel an iota of duty or lofty eagerness to protect the kingdom.

Of course I won't. Why would I fight against that thing?!

He'd have to risk his life to fight the monster. But there was no chance that he'd win even if he did. Someone could offer him billions of dollars to try, but Lloyd would still turn them down. With such a decision in mind, Lloyd continued rushing forward, but it looked like Javier, who was running at his side, was on a different page than him.

"Master Lloyd," Javier called, "where are we running off to?"

"Outside the garden."

"Then what strategy are you planning to respond with?"

“...”

Lloyd stared at Javier as he continued to run. Javier stared back, sending a gaze that seemed to say, "What's wrong?"

This scoundrel.

Then it occurred to Lloyd that Javier had misunderstood him. Javier must think, Lloyd told himself, that he was running somewhere with a great strategy or solid plan in mind. He must be expecting Lloyd to respond to the situation.

But I'm not that kind of person.

He couldn't be that sort of person. So, he decided to clear their misunderstanding first.

Pulling the corners of his mouth upward, Lloyd retorted, "Respond? Plan? What?"

"Yes," Javier replied.

"Um, if I have to put a name to it... Operation 911?"

"Excuse me?"

"I mean, run for your life."

“...”

Javier's face stiffened as he stared at Lloyd. On second thought, his face would be better described as angry rather than stiff.

"Master Lloyd..." His voice was now lower than a while ago. "Why are you always like this?"

"Like what?" asked Lloyd innocently.

"Many people are in danger right now. And yet, you do not hesitate to run away for your own safety, disregarding everyone else's."

"Yeah. You're right." Lloyd shrugged. And he replied nonchalantly, "Is that bad?"

“...”

"I think we argued over something like this before, right?"

"It was in Cremo," Javier reminded him.

"You're right. The Gigatitan."

"At that time, you were-"

Lloyd interrupted him. "Yeah. I ran away just like now."

“...”

"Is this really wrong?" Lloyd asked, meaning every word.

People who sacrificed themselves for others during disasters and accidents, like firefighters jumping into the plumes of fire and police officers and citizens helping out to respond to the accident, all deserved respect. They could be said to be the true heroes of this world. But what about Lloyd? He was different from them.

I'm a normal person. These kinds of situations scare me.

To be honest, Lloyd didn't want to die. He just wanted to enjoy a simple life. He didn't care to act like a hero or be praised as one. But it seemed that Javier thought otherwise.

"You have not changed at all, Master Lloyd."

Javier looked Lloyd's way, and there was disappointment in his eyes. No, it'd be more correct to say it was bitter regret. A bitter smile appeared on Lloyd's mouth.

"I can't do anything about it," Lloyd said. "I'll always be like this."

"Do you mean it?" asked Javier.

"Do you think I'm lying to you right now?"

"No. However-"

"However?"

"Then enjoy living on my behalf as well."

"Eh...?" Lloyd stopped dead in his tracks. He questioned the other man. "What? What do you mean?" Javier was now wearing a face full of resolution. And he spoke with even more determination and sincerity.

"It was my honor to serve you all this time, Master Lloyd. I hope you safely escape from here." 

"Hey."

"And please convey my message to Count Frontera that I am grateful for our time until now and to please forgive me for not being able to protect him longer."

"Hey, you!"

Lloyd was flustered. Why was Javier talking like he was going to die soon? Why was Javier not responding to him? What was that faint, enigmatic smile on his face before he rushed off toward the Bone Dragon without a second glance? Lloyd couldn't understand anything.

"What was that...? I got goosebumps from listening to him..."

Left alone, Lloyd let out a chuckle. Sure, it was commendable for Javier to head back to prevent a disaster, but was the overly dramatic speech necessary?

It's no surprise coming from a protagonist in a novel.

That was the problem with fictional protagonists. As if it wasn't enough to fight for justice, they gave corny speeches that made him wince in embarrassment.

Well, Javier was always like this.

Lloyd threw his gaze at the direction Javier had run off to. Javier was already gone. Lloyd could only see the clear outlines of the Bone Dragon going berserk.

“...”

He's going to be okay, right? Lloyd brushed off the pang of nervousness and started to run again. He sprinted ahead to escape.

He's Javier. He'll be all right. Of course, nothing bad will happen.

Why? He was a sword master who could utilize the Asrahan Core Technique. He was stronger than most other sword masters out there. He was a genius among geniuses, surely to be remembered in history for his incredible strength, swordsmanship, fighting technique, skill application and variety, and ability to improvise. It wouldn't be easy for something to go wrong with him. He wouldn't die so easily. It was nearly impossible...

"Ugh. Come on! Why did he have to make me worry with those words!"

Lloyd bellowed, and he stopped running. Swiveling in annoyance, he glowered at the Bone Dragon.

At this rate, Javier will die.

He remembered what Javier said in the novel. The Bone Dragon. Theoretically, only grandmasters could put up a fight against him. But Javier was a simple sword master right now. So, rushing to fight head-on with the dragon would result in his death.

He won't back down without a fight.

It was a reasonable assumption considering Javier's personality. No, it was more than likely to be the truth. 

If the queen is in danger, he'll throw himself in harm's way. And if someone else is in danger, he'll rush to protect them too.

That was the kind of man Javier was. In the novel and their current life, Javier had remained the same. So, he would be no different this time. And that was exactly why Lloyd thought he'd die this time. He was a bit opposed to it.

"Come on..."

Is this what it felt like to leave a horribly obstinate friend at the scene of an accident? Lloyd turned back, gnashing his teeth. And he made for the opposite way, where the dragon was.

Fine. I'll go! I'm going! You bastard! I will pull you out of that place, even if I have to drag you out by your ear.

Of course, Lloyd had no intention of fighting the monster. It was just senseless to fight against the Bone Dragon. His plan involved carrying out some gimmicks and finding a chance to get Javier out of there. The latter may censure him for being a coward, but his survival came first. Resolved, Lloyd ran.

"Dammit! That bastard, really!"

♣ 

"Please, Your Majesty. I am sincerely speaking. I beg you to quickly evacuate this scene!"

"No."

Even though the royal guard commander loyally pleaded with the queen, Queen Magentano dismissed his request.

"If you genuinely wish to save me, you better lower your voice first," she scolded.

"Oh..." The commander flinched. "Was I too loud, Your Majesty?"

"Yes, to the point that I am glad that the dragon didn't hear us."

Queen Magentano slightly moved her head, taking a peek through the thick screen of grass they were hiding behind. The Bone Dragon, unreservedly going berserk under the moon, came into her view. It felt as though no living creature could tame the monster.

The royal guards in charge of watching the banquet hall seemed to be struggling to not get stomped under the bone dragon's feet. It couldn't be called a fight or battle. They looked more like a swarm of ants fleeing for their lives from the tongue of an eager anteater. The face of the commander darkened as he observed the sight beside the queen.

"Your Majesty," the commander said in a worrying tone, "What do you plan to do now?"

"What else?" A fierce smile hung on her mouth. "I have to fight."

"However..."

"Then do you wish for me to run away in the face of a threat to our kingdom?"

"Not at all, Your Majesty. However-"

"However?"

"Please forgive me for saying this, but it seems appropriate to retreat and recover from battle," the guard commander pointed out.

"You are not wrong," she agreed, "but I see it a bit differently." She paused before continuing to talk. "There is no way of knowing how the Bone Dragon came to be from a pile of dragon bones and started to move nor what trickery the warlocks used on me after I suppressed them. If there is one thing I know, it is that I am relieved the Bone Dragon wreaked havoc in this garden instead of anywhere else."

"By relieved, what do you mean, Your Majesty?"

"Imagine what would have happened if the monster ran wild in the capital now."

"Oh..."

The commander's face turned as pale as a sheet. The Bone Dragon rampaging the capital where there were tens of thousands of citizens? The thought alone sent chills down his spine.

"So, I must make sure that it stays right here," Queen Magentano went on. "Until the royal troops are prepared for battle and launch an organized counterattack."

"Do you mean Your Majesty will personally stall for time?"

"Of course."

Queen Magentano was looking at him now. Her gaze and facial expression reflected a slight disdain for him for asking such an obvious question.

"Who else, if not me, is a sword master? You? All by yourself?"

"If you order me to, I shall-"

"No, you have proven your worth by staying at my side all this time to protect me," complimented the queen. "Therefore, it is my turn to prove my own worth."

"Your worth... Your Majesty? There is no need for you to do so. Your existence alone already-"

"A person who wears the crown to protect their kingdom and people. Is that not the definition of a monarch?"

“...”

"I am simply fulfilling my duty."

"Y-your Majesty!"

"Shh. I said lower your voice," ordered the queen."

"Then... May I join the fight alongside your majesty?"

"That will likely be difficult as you are not a sword master."

"But my duty and calling is to protect you by your side," insisted the commander.

"Then your calling for today is to protect your guards. At this rate, they will all die."

Queen Magentano pointed to the garden with her chin. The guards were struggling to avoid getting trampled under the Bone Dragon's feet. The face of the commander darkened.

"But my duty is to stay by your side before anything else-"

"This is an order." Queen Magentano's voice was firm and definitive.

"Your words are my command..." The commander lowered his head.

Grinning, she replied, "Thank you for understanding my words and for protecting me today. Then I will leave everything to you now."

"Y-your Majesty!"

"What?" she snapped.

"I dare... pray for you to remain safe."

"I understand. Well then."

With that, she was gone.

Rustle. Queen Magentano walked out of the grass. Her movements were completely natural as though there was nothing special about her decision. And she pulled out a sword from her waist without giving time for the commander to stop her and emanated a wave of energy with her whole body.

Fwoosh! Her manaheart raged, and an even more fierce wave of energy circled around her. The commotion was no less than the Bone Dragon's mana roar that had swept the entire banquet hall.

Kaboom! It was rough yet sharp at the same time and as threatening as a wild predator. The powerful energy prompted Bone Dragon to react at once.

“...”

The Bone Dragon stopped its movement. Queen Magentano lowered her sword. The dragon that came back from death. The human monarch protects her kingdom. The gazes of the two met. Queen Magentano's body trembled just then.

“...”

Certainly, the dragon was nothing to joke about. The moment she met the Bone Dragon's gaze, shivers ran down her spine as though she was covered with ice water. That was why she chuckled instead and put on a brave face, repeating the following words in her head.

I am not afraid.

She wasn't confident that she would win. She didn't expect to. But it didn't matter to her. Even if she lost and perished, she vowed that she would at least buy enough time for her kingdom and people to be prepared to protect themselves.

That is why.

She walked toward the Bone Dragon once again without a moment of hesitation.

This is my duty

Failure. Death. None of it scared her. She instead glowered at the Bone Dragon with a calm gaze.

I am a queen.

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[lloydfrontera]

anyway have i talked about how i think it sucks the adaptation got rid of the subplot of javier knowing about suho's identity without lloyd knowing and being really conflicted about it only to slowly come to trust him based on his actions?? this is a rhetorical question of course i have.

i just. it's such a big part of javier's character. he's so careful and protective of the fronteras, he loves them so much, he can't stand the idea of doing something that could hurt them and he doesn't know if he can trust lloyd with them.

he used to. he trusted lloyd more than anyone. he truly believed he wanted the best for his family. and then he finds out lloyd has been lying to him for years, has made him unknowingly fail in his most important duty, has been deceiving the family he loves so much and he doesn't know if he can trust him to do right by them anymore.

but. but it's lloyd. and javier is very, very weak when it comes to lloyd. even if he doesn't quite realize just how much.

he wants to believe in lloyd. he hopes and he wishes and he tentatively lets himself do it but he doesn't really know if he can.

What you think about the family, the lord, and about me. I cannot tell if you are using us. Whether that is why you have been hiding your identity this entire time. I do not know the answer to anything. However... However... Javier had only one wish. I hope I won't come to regret the countless number of times I made the decision to help you in the past and in the present.

but god does he want to.

and then a big part of the rest of their relationship arc is javier regaining the trust in lloyd he'd lost. is him analyzing lloyd's actions and words and deciding for himself that yes, he can trust this man. he can trust him to do the right thing, he can trust him with his most precious people, he can trust him above anyone else despite the fact that lloyd won't tell him the truth.

and it's extra poignant because lloyd has absolutely no idea about this. javier never lets him know. he goes through a crisis of faith, a slowburn of trust and then has a feelings realization without ever telling lloyd a word about it. lloyd manages to gain back javier's trust plus his complete devotion without even really trying because he doesn't even know he has to.

it's an insane character arc and relationship and i love it. it's also a big part of their dynamic later on the novel and i do not understand why they just. threw it away in favor of an anticlimactic revelation with a dash of character assassination.

i wonder what they will substitute this dynamic with or if they will just,,, not give them anything else to replace it

[lloydfrontera]

I never, ever once thought about a life without Master Lloyd, and even right now.

:)

[lloydfrontera]

man this fucking sucks lmao. if they had made alicia join hearts with lloyd that would've at least been funny in a really infuriating way. but. they didn't even do that. sigh. i don¡t know what i expected tbh.

[lloydfrontera]

Wait!!! Have you remembered to sexualise and lust after a morally repugnant fictional character today??

[lloydfrontera]

i do think it's very funny that we're told that adeline waited almost a decade for rakiel and it's supposed to be this romantic gesture that implies they will at some point develop a relationship. but like. this is right after we see that no only did damian wait the same amount of time, he was actively searching for rakiel while waiting and very much risking his life in every attempt. so like. lol. lmao even.

[lloydfrontera]

​i lied. i don't like sex. open heart surgery

[lloydfrontera]

siendo honestos cuando hablo de devoción terminal no quiero decir que damian y rakiel estén enamorados el uno del otro necesariamente. bueno,, damian un poquito a lo mejor pero mas que nada siento que los dos solo,,, se aman mucho. en un nivel tan visceral y profundo. que ni siquiera se han puesto a pensar realmente en que sentido. y para el final ya no importa realmente. siento que pasaron tanto tiempo solo tratando de protegerse el uno al otro, queriendo mas que nada mantener al otro con vida, que nunca tuvieron tiempo o oportunidad para pensar en su relación o sus sentimientos. asi que ya para el final ninguno de los dos siente realmente ninguna necesidad de definir su relación aparte de "esta es la persona mas importante en el mundo para mi, daria cualquier cosa por mantenerla a salvo y quiero pasar el resto de mi vida con ella". y como que ya no les importa si es algo platonico o romantico o los dos o ninguno porque,, el amor allí está. y no importa el nombre que se le ponga, lo unico que importa es que puedan estar juntos. ya lo que venga despues es solo un extra.

[lloydfrontera]

Hi, ok this is going to be weird but I really wanna hear your opinion. This is for research. Who tops in the Rakiel Javillon Damien dynamic. Not as a threesome but just between those characters. I know you're Ace so forgive me if it's not up your alley

the funniest ask i have. we're chill anon but i am not gonna take it seriously be warned

out of three, rakiel and damian have what can be considered by far the closest to the norm sex. they switch and this is it. i haven't thought about it too much okay

javilon and rakiel are funny because javilon thinks he's able to top but the man just crumbles. there's no way this loser can handle it. he has too much going on just let him lie down. old tired man needs his rest

damien and javilon switch but it all depends on who is left with enough energy to do so after they beat each other up like male betta fish whenever their eyes meet

[lloydfrontera]

character who;s doomed form the start but not because of tragedy or anything but because they're a woman and their writer is a misogynist

[lloydfrontera]

character who;s doomed form the start but not because of tragedy or anything but because they're a woman and their writer is a misogynist

[lloydfrontera]

character who;s doomed form the start but not because of tragedy or anything but because they're a woman and their writer is a misogynist

[lloydfrontera]

That post that's like "stop writing characters who talk like they're trying to get a good grade in therapy" really blew the door wide open for me about how common it's become for a character's emotional intelligence to not be taken into consideration when writing conflict. I remember the first time I went to therapy I had such a hard time even identifying what I was feeling, let alone had the language to explain it to someone else. Of course there are plenty of people who've never been to therapy a day in their life who are in tune to their emotions. But even they would have some trouble expressing themselves sometimes. You have to take into account there are plenty of people who are uncomfortable expressing themselves and people who think they're not allowed to feel certain ways. It also makes for more interesting conflict to have characters with different levels of understanding.

[lloydfrontera]

I can't remember who said it but someone on twitter brought up the time difference between earth and hell (one day on earth is about one month in hell) and since javier died 3 years before lloyd, he would have had to wait basically an entire lifetime to meet him again (~90 years) and that just broke me,, ( ; ω ; )

no wonder he threatened lloyd to either stay with him in hell for at least a few hundred years or become an archangel...

[lloydfrontera]

The best quality a fictional man can have is being deeply, pathetically, wretchedly in love with someone, I think