longdistanceidiot-blog

[longdistanceidiot-blog]

This is a tumblr hug. Pass this to at least 10 of your favourite tumblr followers to show how much you love them as best buddies. Make sure you don’t break the chain. Happy tumblr hugs! (◕‿◕✿)

Hi my lovely, I have gone MIA for the last few months?? How have you been?

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Him: my personality is electric

Me: oh is that so. Why haven't I been zapped yet then?

Him: it's because I've been keeping my voltage down low

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1. push yourself to get up before the rest of the world - start with 7am, then 6am, then 5:30am. go to the nearest hill with a big coat and a scarf and watch the sun rise. 2. push yourself to fall asleep earlier - start with 11pm, then 10pm, then 9pm. wake up in the morning feeling re-energized and comfortable. 3. erase processed food from your diet. start with no lollies, chips, biscuits, then erase pasta, rice, cereal, then bread. use the rule that if a child couldn’t identify what was in it, you don’t eat it. 4. get into the habit of cooking yourself a beautiful breakfast. fry tomatoes and mushrooms in real butter and garlic, fry an egg, slice up a fresh avocado and squirt way too much lemon on it. sit and eat it and do nothing else. 5. stretch. start by reaching for the sky as hard as you can, then trying to touch your toes. roll your head. stretch your fingers. stretch everything. 6. buy a 1L water bottle. start with pushing yourself to drink the whole thing in a day, then try drinking it twice. 7. buy a beautiful diary and a beautiful black pen. write down everything you do, including dinner dates, appointments, assignments, coffees, what you need to do that day. no detail is too small. 8. strip your bed of your sheets and empty your underwear draw into the washing machine. put a massive scoop of scented fabric softener in there and wash. make your bed in full. 9. organise your room. fold all your clothes (and bag what you don’t want), clean your mirror, your laptop, vacuum the floor. light a beautiful candle. 10. have a luxurious shower with your favourite music playing. wash your hair, scrub your body, brush your teeth. lather your whole body in moisturiser, get familiar with the part between your toes, your inner thighs, the back of your neck. 11. push yourself to go for a walk. take your headphones, go to the beach and walk. smile at strangers walking the other way and be surprised how many smile back. bring your dog and observe the dog’s behaviour. realise you can learn from your dog. 12. message old friends with personal jokes. reminisce. suggest a catch up soon, even if you don’t follow through. push yourself to follow through. 14. think long and hard about what interests you. crime? sex? boarding school? long-forgotten romance etiquette? find a book about it and read it. there is a book about literally everything. 15. become the person you would ideally fall in love with. let cars merge into your lane when driving. pay double for parking tickets and leave a second one in the machine. stick your tongue out at babies. compliment people on their cute clothes. challenge yourself to not ridicule anyone for a whole day. then two. then a week. walk with a straight posture. look people in the eye. ask people about their story. talk to acquaintances so they become friends. 16. lie in the sunshine. daydream about the life you would lead if failure wasn’t a thing. open your eyes. take small steps to make it happen for you.

Sixteen Small Steps to Happiness   (via robotgod)

[longdistanceidiot-blog]

His weather vs my weather. How weird. Usually it is raining in England, not in Australia!

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For him, this is pretty romantic (Pete was the bait btw).

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What would be your petronus? (Harry potter reference)

Me: Some kind of bird. Probably a budgie

Him: Mine would be optimus prime

Me: ...

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Things that he does

CDA (cyber displays of affection). He hates them but he will still give me a kiss via Skype, even when he is not in the privacy of his own home. Ha ha!

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Distance is only temporary

Long distance idiot

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Things that he does

He will send me a text kiss out of the blue.

I wonder if he knows how beautiful that makes me feel.

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Me: We are going to be tumblr famous

Him: Well what happens when you move here? Can't be a long distance blog anymore

Me: We will make a new blog then

Him: What like ten miles away?

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I would much prefer that he was here to keep me warm. But since he is not, it is onesie time! #onesie weather

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Your eyes. They drive me wild.

Long distance idiot

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I cannot wait until the day where I can run the tip of my tongue, ever so gently, along your bottom lip

Long distance idiot

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Me: Babe I'm just letting you know that I plan to get a face lift when I'm 50. Just so you know.

Him: Well I'm going to get really really really fat when I'm 50. Just clearing that up now...

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Ldr dilemma

We had a conversation last night about what constitutes a healthy relationship. This came about after a close friend came to me in tears after another failed courtship. Same story. She wanted to spend every spare moment at his. So every night she would wait for his call to let him dictate how he wanted to spend the night.

For the first week it meant spending every single night together with loads of hardcore sex. During the second week it was every other day of okay sex. By the third it was a short text message to tell her that she was overwhelming him.

Do you see something wrong with this picture? Well she didn’t.

So Bindian and I discussed the things that we thought were wrong with this picture. We both agreed that it was a total ‘dating game’ FAIL. Was he using her for sex? Did she appear too clingy? Did he have commitment issues? Was she too eager? Etcetera etcetera.

WE DON’T KNOW.

But this did lead to an interesting discussion point.

Is it wrong to give up ones hobbies, interests, time with friends and family (which is what she did) for a brand new relationship?

My first response was NO. A new relationship should be an addition to whatever you already have in place. It doesn’t make sense to give up the beautiful myriad of existing relationships for just one new one. Does it?

My bindian disagreed. He disagreed. What?! He disagreed?!

Yes he disagreed because he thinks that sometimes for new relationships to work, it may mean some sacrifices need to occur.

I didn’t get it.

He then gently reminded me of the things that I was giving up to move over to England to be with him.

Oh. I get it now.

Well is it right to sacrifice that much of yourself in order to give your LDR a fair go? Why?

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There is such a thing as PDA etiquette so excess affection in public is a NO.

I write this as I am squished too far left in my already narrow budget airline seat. I glance over to my right at the couple next to me. I am amazed. How long can you possibly hold that awkward position for? Picture this. Bf at least 6 ft is cradling the head of his gf like it is a newborn baby. He is hunched over like he is breast feeding her. He is also in my space from trying to accommodate her large head. I am honestly amused. He has sat like that for at least 15 minutes. He adjusts position. Gf squeals. NO JOKE. She squeals. He freezes. Then he kisses her to settle her. It's not a quiet kiss either. It is squelchy and it is slurpy and I swear it is at least the 100th time he has done it. It sounds like he is eating her face. I think I want to vomit. I must have unconsciously moved further to my left because I am now aware of a pain in my left rib from where the arm rest is digging in. Ew. Another face eating kiss. Why oh why did I forget my ear phones?! Please god make time move faster. To distract me, I have looked over to my left at the people across the aisle. Another couple. But instead of gf using bf as a cradle/cot/whatever she is using him as a foot rest. Lol. I love it (although she really could do with a pedicure or at least a foot wash). Yes. I have decided that that is how I will roll when I finally get to travel with my bindian. The lucky boy will get to cradle my feet on every plane ride 👟👡👠👢. Sigh. Just need to hurry up and sort this distance thing first.

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Telephone interview FAIL.

So admittedly I have been moping for the last 5 hours.

No really.

I am super moping.

AND I have eaten 5 chocolate bars. Shame. My butt is also sore from sitting in the same spot.

I feel very sorry for myself.

Just where did the calm, cool, witty and very in control chick who could handle anything and everything go? because what you see right now? it AIN'T attractive. Hmm. Maybe she was a figment of my imagination.

Context? My first interview for a position in the UK was today. It had to be done over the phone for geographical reasons.

How did I go?

I laughed (even when no joke had been told?).

I spluttered.

I sighed.

I stuttered.

I stammered.

I choked (on my spit! Who does that!?!).

I also spat while talking (lucky it was a telephone interview).

Sigh.

Better luck next time. It was just practice. I'll do better for the next one. What can't kill you can only make you stronger. Chill out it was the first one. 

Yeah yeah I'll keep telling myself that.  

I think I'll have another chocolate bar.