loveenddeepspace

[loveenddeepspace]

Caleb! I'm so stressed and overwhelmed. I'm trying to finish a project, but it's taking way too long and it's making me behind schedule. This was supposed to be fun, but now I'm just stressed. Can you cuddle me to help cheer me up and keep me from having (another) breakdown? Please??

Come here pips, let me take care of everything for a while.

[loveenddeepspace]

Zayne x CrushingNurse!Reader | Part Four

When the joke stops being funny ( time for angst muahaha )

Part One • Part Two • Part Three

Love and Deepspace Masterlist

I | It started when you dropped a pen after Zayne passed by, and one of the nurses whispered loud enough for others to hear, “Careful, she might faint. He breathed near her.” You were shocked, still you laughed with them. That was the first time you didn’t meet Zayne’s eyes all day.

II | You used to prep his morning coffee without being asked. One day, a colleague asked, “Are you trying to date him or adopt him?”

You did not know how to answer her, you could only watch her walk away as she chuckled to herself. You could feel the warmth spread up to your cheeks, embarassment running through every single vein in your body- you threw the coffe you prepared down the sink, both yours and His. Later on, Zayne passed by the desk you were standing at and asked, “Are the coffee machines broken?”

You bit your lip as a pang of guilt - and embarassment again - hit you right in your chest. "No, they are not broken." You answered and looked back at your screen right after, quietly dismissing him. He stood there for a moment, you could feel his eyes inspecting you and you did your best to keep a poker face- after a few seconds he quietly walked away.

III | You started sitting at the far end of the table during meetings. Zayne glanced toward your usual spot. When his eyes passed over you, you looked down. He did not say a word about it, but the way his tone turned clipped for the rest of the briefing? He did not have to.

IV | A group of nurses giggled when you rushed into the OR after being called by Zayne. One said, “She gets summoned and sprints like she’s about to get proposed to.” You tried to laugh. It cracked in the middle. You were used to these comments coming from Mc- but you had built somewhat a friendship with her, these were just your collegues. Collegues whom you definately did not have the kind of bond with to be making such jokes. But, it's fine. They were just joking, they did not meet any harm.

V | You stopped wearing the pretty clip you used to use for your hair. The one Zayne had gotten for you as a birthday present. You had been shocked, but so excited when he congratulated you and had worn the golden hairclip ever since. Until a nurse asked you, "Do you wear it because your hair actually gets in the way or just because a certain doctor gifted it to you?"

VI | Zayne asked you a question and you stuttered again - usually you just laugh it off and Zayne raises and eyebrow. This time, you saw the same nurses that had been dropping comments about you chuckle as they looked your way. You just apologized and walked off mid-sentence. He stared after you for a beat too long, lips slightly parted like he might call out. He didn't.

VII | One of the new nurses caught you staring at Zayne across the hallway and whispered, “Dream smaller.” What? It wasn’t loud. But loud enough for the people nearby to chuckle. You chuckled with them, even though the knife that had been stuck in your chest these past weeks twisted even further.

VIII | Zayne corrected a minor error in your notes. Usually, you’d flush and nod and promise to fix it. This time, you just said, “Yes, Doctor,” and turned away before he could say more. He watched you walk off with something tight behind his eyes.

IX | The nurse’s break room got suspiciously quiet when you walked in. A moment later, someone said, “Wonder how she even got placed on his team. Must’ve blushed her way in.” You stood frozen. No one said anything, they just laughed as if your weren't standing right there, just making a cup of coffee. It felt like all the breath had been knocked out of your chest, because even though she worded it carefully as she did, you knew exactly what she implied.

X | You stopped speaking in group briefings unless directly addressed. Once, you did answer a question, and someone coughed “Pet” into their elbow. Zayne raised his head at the sound, you could see him question himself whether he really heard that right or not. He glanced at you. You didn’t meet his gaze.

XI | MC came to Zayne for a check up and found you pecking at your lunch alone at the desk instead of with the others in the breakroom. She walked around the desk and sat beside you at the empty chair. You tried to act fine. She didn’t comment on the cold sandwich or your red eyes. She just said, “Want me to punch anyone?” You shook your head. She muttered, “Coward,” and stayed with you anyway.

XII | Zayne asked for assistance with a patient and you hesitated before agreeing. He tilted his head slightly. “You always volunteer.” You shrugged. “I just thought maybe someone more… competent could”

"You are one of the most if not the most competent nurses here." He replied, then kept an eye on you. Waiting for the way your eyes would widen and shine at the compliment - as you usually would. And you wanted to, but you already feeling the side eye your collegue next you shot you- you kept your head down. Still, you helped him out. His jaw was tight the entire appointment.

XIII | MC watched you fumble and apologize for a mistake that wasn’t yours as she was seated in the waiting room. When you left, a nurse said, “She’s scared he’ll stop liking her if she breathes wrong.” MC raised a brow and said, “Funny she is the one scared when she has the least reason to be." Silence.

XIV | You dropped your ID badge and someone said, “Pick it up, maybe he'll see something that'll actually catch his attention” You laughed. Later, when Zayne said your name, you had to push back tears at his voice. He noticed.

XV | You once brushed past him in the hallway and he turned slightly, as if expecting a nod or greeting. You didn’t say anything. Didn’t even slow your pace.

XVI | Zayne began checking over your work more than usual. Not criticizing—just… looking. Quietly. One day he said, “Your....way of leaving notes to me have changed.” You said, “I’m just trying to be more professional.” He looked like he wanted to ask something. He didn’t.

XVII | You tried to smile at him when handing over a chart, but it came out wrong—tight, strained. He took the clipboard and said nothing. But he was still holding it when you walked away, not flipping the page.

XVIII | Zayne told a mildly sarcastic joke during rounds- keeping an eye out for your reaction expecting your usual nervous giggle.. The group laughed. You didn’t.

XIX | Mc showed up again, something told you it had nothing to do with a check up or another reason she had to see Zayne for- maybe you were delusional, but you thought maybe she came to check up one you. No one had in a long time. “You know he’s not blind, right?” You smiled, “I think he might be.”

XX | One evening, Zayne passed by and paused near your desk. You didn’t look up. He said, “You’ve been different lately.” You kept typing. “Just focusing on work.” He didn’t move. “…Did someone say something to you?”

Silence.

"No." You responded simply, quietly- but somehow that single word felt like a cry, a shout- as if you were banging on a invisible glass cage you were trapped in.

He walked away but as he lay in bed that night he could not stop thinking about it.

All Rights Reserved © DarlingsBlackBook

[loveenddeepspace]

[loveenddeepspace]

Noooo one of my fave lads blogs deactivated 😭

[loveenddeepspace]

҉ ⁀➷ 𝑩𝑳𝑶𝑩𝑩𝑼

LOVE AND DEEPSPACE: BLOSSOM ESCAPE

[loveenddeepspace]

sweet evil trap

thank you @sahxrii for the expert consultation on zayne's preferred desserts

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i redownloaded the game after a year of not playing and the period tracker actually predicted my period correctly so now im celebrating by giving all my pain to this stylus guy or whatver his name is

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zayne using the defibrillator in june: QUEER i mean CLEAR

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save a cow ride a boy or what um save a uh ride a horse no its save a uhh guys who we saving

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sleeping with caleb (ᴗ˳ᴗ)ᶻ

—hcs about sharing a bed with caleb bc i still haven't finished his bday fic :p

☆ caleb has long accepted that he’s never getting his personal space back (good, he doesn't want it anyway). no matter what position he falls asleep in, he always wakes up at the edge of the bed, ass hanging out, with your arms and legs wrapped around him like a koala. he doesn't mind really, because he loves that you still gravitate towards him, even in your sleep.

☆ whenever you get into a petty argument, you make a point of building a pillow barrier between you. when he tries to protest, you just shoot him daggers and turn your back. you can't sleep because of his constant shuffling, but eventually, you knock down the barrier bit by bit, letting him roll over beside you and softly whisper an apology in your ear while he pulls you close. you don’t respond because you’re still upset, but you just let him hold you. and that alone is enough for him

☆ winters in skyhaven are brutal because of the high altitude. so on cold winter nights, you find yourself drawn to caleb because he's just so warm—he's basically a human radiator. when you're feeling cheeky, you like to slide your cold hands under his shirt and laugh evily whenever he flinches

☆ whenever you visit him in skyhaven, he insists on sleeping in your room together. It's not that he dislikes his room, he just prefers being in the space you've curated in his home. he loves being surrounded by things that smell like you, breathing you in while he falls asleep

☆ caleb likes to pretend he's still asleep when you think you've woken up before him. he lets you poke his cheek, blow in his face, tickle his chin, play with his hair until he’s had enough and rolls you over, pulling you into a soul-crushing hug you can’t escape

☆ his favourite time of day is the moment you fall asleep at night, and the moment just before you wake up in the morning. there’s something about your face that looks so peaceful and soft, that makes him fall in love with you all over again. he loves that you’re the first and last thing he sees every day

☆ contrary to what people might think, but caleb loves being the little spoon and being held. he doesn't do it often, but after long shifts with the fleet, there's nothing he loves more than lying on your chest, listening to your breathing while you stroke his hair. his worries melt away instantly, and he always falls asleep faster than usual—some of his best sleeps, honestly.

☆ caleb, the self-proclaimed claw machine master, is a prime example of suffering from your own success. not only does he have to share the bed with you, but with the 20+ plushies that he won and proudly bragged about. now he’s got his own personal plushie (you) snuggled up next to him, along with twenty others, silently staring into his soul

☆ caleb’s bed head is horrendous, and don't even get me started on his morning breath. you love counting all his cowlicks and taking pictures of his messy hair, holding your nose like you’re disgusted. but when he catches you laughing too long, he shuts you up by peppering your face with kisses before pulling you in for one long, deep kiss that leaves you breathless

☆ caleb is a light sleeper, so when he hears you tossing and turning, struggling to fall asleep, he gently pulls you into his chest and starts telling stories, just like he used to when you were kids. you call it childish, but the sound of his voice, soft and steady, is all it takes for sleep to quickly wash over you. and once your breathing slows down and your body relaxes, he whispers a quiet list of reasons why he loves you—one after the other, just for you

a/n- blessing you with a lot bc i couldnt stop at one. i cant be the only one that uses he's secret times as a sleep aid, his voice is so soothing i knock out instantly. short blabber bc i haven't finished half my fics i was meant to post last week. this caleb bday fic has been sitting in my drafts for over a month 🚬🚬

[loveenddeepspace]

these two’s noses has never looked better

[loveenddeepspace]

CHEATER!

You lose in kitty cards :(

Let me tell you something if you know Zayne then you know he’s taking it home in this game. He treats it like a surgery, he’s precise! You can’t tell what he’s thinking or what cards he has because he doesn’t show it on his face. Not a single indicator to show he’s winning or losing. You have been playing this game for so long you think you might die with these cards clutched in your hands.

“Do you need a break?” He asks raising his eyebrows. You wanted to mock him so bad. You could do this, you’re an adult. Even though he’s won the past 11 rounds who’s to say you won’t win the 12th?

“No. Play the game.” You tell him eyeing him intensely. He hums before slapping a magic paw down reducing your kitty with the 12 points to go down to 1. You nearly fell apart.

“Your turn.” He tells you but you didn’t want to play anymore. You wanted to log out so bad.

“Do you think this is spades?” You genuinely ask him making him almost burst into laughter.

“I’m just trying to fairly play the game.” He clears his throat. Your eyes were wide, mouth agape, and head tilted to the side.

“This is playing fair?!” You press your fingertips on the table. Zayne looks away from you trying not to laugh.

Sylus has been laughing at you this whole round. He has taken away all number cards 3 times and he’s still ahead! How does he have 30 points and no cards! You slump in your seat in defeat.

“Giving up?” He taunts you, folding your arms. You glare at him—fire in your eyes. Determination fuels you as you slam down a brown 6.

“Your. Turn.” You grit with your teeth. He smirks putting down a bye-bye card taking away your highest point. You slam your head on the table.

“Giving up?” His sultry voice taunting you. You groan, “Giving up.” He chuckles shaking his head.

Rafayel has been cheating and you were going to catch him. He had a smug look on his face as he placed down a meowster. You looked through your cards when out the corner of your eye you see him taking cards. You smack his hand to which he flinches back.

“I knew you were cheating!” You shouted as he rubs his hand.

“Is it cheating if I’m adding to my deck?” He argues back with a glare. You nod dramatically as Rafayel sighs.

“Not your turn fish stick.” You glare putting down a green 4. He huffs crossing his arms.

“Only humans worry about something small like this.” He mumbles. He still won because you caught the cheating too late.

Xavier was one of the best players of kitty cards. He played regularly not slamming down cards, yelling, or cheating but somehow he always won. You were on the verge of puking. How was he doing that?

“Xavier…have mercy.” You drag out as you lay your head down. He chuckles waiting for you to put your card down.

“We can stop if you’d like. I only play because you like the game.” He explained shrugging his shoulders. You wipe your hand down your face.

You gave up because he just kept winning. It was the 10th round! Have mercy.

Caleb let you win a few times because he loves you. Love doesn’t pay the bills though so he starts hitting you with all kinds of cards. You don’t know how this happened. Luckily for you he kinda sucks at this game.

“Is that all you got pipsqueak?” He was at 28 points his arms crossed while you were at 21 points.

“Caleb have I ever told you that I hate you?” You ask him clasping your fingers together. His eyes widen at you. “No?!”

“I should.” You tell him putting down a 4 while he puts a six down. You were going to flip the damn table.

“I win again.” He teases making you glare at him.

This been in the vault because Zayne be kicking my ass in this game ngl 😔

[loveenddeepspace]

Nobody:

Sylus randomly once in a while:

[loveenddeepspace]

Reblog to give prev the power to write their fanfiction

[loveenddeepspace]

SNOWCROW UNI AU DUMP!!

all of these are reposts from my twitter, and some never seen before doodles :p ive got so many brain rot for this au but i dont have the time to draw them with me being a uni student myself, so i'll use this as an outlet to yap

ofc yes snowcrow are roomies duhhhh. the other boys are included as well but its primarily focused on snowcrow. both of them are nerds, sy just doesnt fit in the stereotype appearance wise. he also rarely leaves his room (bc hes in IT) so hes mostly wearing nothing but his optimus prime boxers. zayne has 5 outfits maximum and repeats the same ones depending on the day, and its either a collared button up shirt or a hoodie. all his pants are identical except for one pair of jeans he wears for special occasions aka going to the mall

in this au, zayne's autism shines more. he's more clumsy and awkward and doesnt get social cue. naive at some times, ESPECIALLY when it comes to ppl tryna hit on him. sy is less macho suave here, chillaxed in a teen core way and an idrgaf attitude. much more of a loser too. and more immature (in comparison to his canon self)

their dorm room: a disaster. its a 2 pax room so both their beds are singles across from each other. only two weeks into the semester sy's space is already full of his stuff to the point he cant even sleep on his bed. robot stuff from his club, personal collection of trinkets and other stuff he COULD throw out but doesnt want to bc he's a hoarder. so now he either sleeps on the floor or on zayne's bed. usually on zayne's bed when he's out for class during day time since his own classes are at night. zayne didnt mind but it meant sy owes him so sy buys him a lot of stuff especially sweet treats and mixue. he also has to drive him everywhere on his motorcycle. "i wanna go to that dessert shop" "you mean the one thats deep in the city full of traffic and hidden in between the alleyways where u have to go through the 7 layers of hell for parking?" "yes" "..................kay."

pets!! sy had mephisto even before entering uni. then later adopted a bearded dragon named bartholomew, mew or bartie for short. zayne took in a stray black cat from the streets. cats rarely like him so when this one didnt run away, immediate adoption. claudius galenus is his name after a greek philosopher, galen for short. obv sy made fun of his name choices, but then again he named a bird after the devil and a reptile "bartholomew". theyre both idiots. sy also enjoys finding random geckos or lizards, and frogs, and snakes. he'd probably own a scarab too. but zayne never allowed those bc galen is a gluttonous hell spawn and eats everything. at one point he started chewing on sy's mattress. no, pets are not allowed in dorms. they got off with a warning the first time. so every time theres even a hint of a spontaneous dorm check, sy asks his mom to babysit their kids. his mom being the sweetheart she is helped them out, though she wondered if her son will ever grow up and be at least acceptable in a professional setting bc she cant imagine him having a corporate career with the way he is now.

money. zayne has a scholarship and during their dorm year, it was easy to live on. he didnt have many assignments that needed money to be spent on, and he was never the shopping type, for clothes or other stuff he cant eat anyways. but ever since they moved out to rent an apartment, money got tighter. sure both his parents are doctors and has no problem giving him extra pocket money, but he prefers to not burden them. so he now he part times at a vet as the clerk! easy click clacking on the monitor job and he gets to meet cute animals. sylus doesnt have a scholar but he's applying for one. in the meantime he gets his money from a website he runs. what website? no one knows. is it legal? most likely no. zayne assumed the site is just an illegal movie streaming platform with how sylus always invites him to watch a new movie on his laptop seconds after its release. but he could be running more than one.

neither of them have that of an exciting social life. theyre either nerding out in their room, or taking a mindless stroll to reconnect with nature. sylus collecting rocks and yapping about the history (or drama) of the british royal family and explaining how the monarchy works, zayne identifying different types of clouds and pulling out candy from his pockets every 10 minutes (they never seem to run out). though at one point, sylus knew how important this stage of their life is. theyre not gonna be young forever and they needed friends, people to socialize with and make connections, mingle with people their age. zayne didnt mind having sy as his only friend, but he did think it would be nice to have a small clique. also the networking thing is important too. so whenever theres an event or festival, they'd always go out with intentions to meet people. it was NOT easy. 1. they dont know how to start a conversation without being too pushy or awkward. 2. they both have resting bitch faces and above 6 ft which makes them seem intimidating. 3. even if they did manage to chat with someone, they would quickly realize how different they were from them. most people who join these social events have **been** social, already in big group of friends that go out partying, clubbing, drinking yadda yadda. not that there's anything wrong with that, it's just a very unfamiliar territory for these two nerds who rarely (or during this point, never) let themselves touch alcohol, couped up in their room with a pigeon, a lizard and whatever the hell galen is, watching pirated movies while wearing matching rocky and bullwinkle socks. so after every attempt at making friends, they'd always walk back to their dorm, just the two of them.

are they dating? no. not yet at least. but do they like each other romantically? maybe. i can vouch for sy tho. the first time he saw zayne he was already smitten by how handsome he was. handsome, but not well put together. baggy clothes, his glasses were slightly crooked, looks like he doesnt know what hair gel is. he didnt know if he was even attracted to men, he did know zayne was the most interesting person he's ever met so far. he brushed it off, thinking its just simple admiration. even if it was a crush, it wasnt a big deal. tho as their friendship grew, he got bolder, casually flirting with him from time to time, just because. zayne being the dumbass he is caught none of it. if sy ever reached out to hold his hand, he's like "oh yeah cool bestie activities" or if he gives a quick peck on the cheek before leaving for class "he must be in a good mood haha" or if he stares longingly while zayne yaps about the history of styrofoams, scooching closer, leaning a bit too close, trying to memorize every detail of zayne's face as if he recognized him from a different life, one where theyre both soul bound, sharing the same last name, melting into each other every night "oh wow he's a really good listener".

yk maybe they are dating. zayne just didnt know about it until it was too late.

that's all i have for now!! sem break is right around the corner so i'll expand this au then :)) pray for me final assessment is biting me in the ass im an animation student and i regret everything

[loveenddeepspace]

Making this for Caleb for his birthday...

crafting a plane launcher with chopsticks by 小小折纸手工

[loveenddeepspace]

you found him asleep on the couch, his head tilted back and a book resting on his chest.

the fire crackled low in the hearth, shadows dancing across his face, softening the sharpness of his features.

even in sleep, sylus looked tired. like he was still fighting ghosts behind closed eyes.

you knelt beside him quietly and took one of his hands. it was cold. sylus always ran cold. you pressed it between your palms, holding it there, breathing warmth into his skin.

“you’re awake,” you whispered, brushing your thumb over his knuckles.

barely opening his eyes, he gave you a tired smile. “didn’t mean to fall asleep on you.”

“you’re allowed,” you said gently. “you’re safe here.”

he pulled your joined hands to his lips and kissed your fingers with a kind of reverence that made your heart ache. “only with you.”