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me: i love you but please, please do not step on my keyboard. go a foot out of your way and go around

my lovable yet ungrateful cat, a troublegirl and a fiend: you could sooner divert a river from its course than deny my nature 

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Can someone tell me how to help LGBTQ people in Brunei without just telling me to boycott luxury hotels I already don’t go to??

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I challenge you up

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straight guy: *only owns cargo shorts, graphic tees, and crocs*

tan: *sighs* in this essay i will

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Swallowtail, by Brenna Twohy

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someone on r/legaladvice was sick of their coworker stealing their food out of the fridge so they started labeling it “POISON - DO NOT EAT” in sharpie on both the bag and the food’s wrapper every day and the person still kept stealing it so after a week they added a bunch of laxatives to their food and the thief had to go to the hospital and could possibly sue OP. the general consensus was that OP was technically objectively in the wrong from a legal standpoint but there is 0% chance of them being convicted in criminal court because that would require finding 12 jurors who would rule in favor of someone stealing food labeled “POISON - DO NOT EAT” and then getting poisoned

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me, violently beating back my emotions with a broom: for the last time i said shut the FUCK up

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depression meal: standing in the kitchen for 15 minutes debating if i have the energy to cook then leaving after eating raw bread

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If you can relate to any of these posts, follow us @anxietyproblem​

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Trainability in cats is a funny thing.

My cats understand and will obey a number of verbal commands, one of which is “go away”. I don’t use it often, but if they’re bugging me and I’m trying to work or doing something that could be dangerous for cats, I can tell them to go away, and off they go - they’ll only keep pestering me if there’s a serious problem they need me to look at.

That said, their idea of a serious problem that requires my attention is somewhat eccentric. Previous instances have included:

There was an unfamiliar car parked across the street

Their water bowl was four inches to the left of its usual position

One of them had puked on the stairs and they didn’t want to walk past it

It was raining

One of them saw a weird bug

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She has a point

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Im drunk in a uber and just gazed upon two dudes in a dunkin donuts having an arm wrestling match

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can someone please explain how it’s possible that every single month this year ended as quickly as it started and yet this whole year has felt like an eternity