lucca-stateofmind

[lucca-stateofmind]

GUYS, the original soundtrack for The Fantastic Four : First Steps was released about a hour ago?? What is it with Marvel spending so much money on its marketing to be spoiling in the end?

[lucca-stateofmind]

[playing Scrabble]

Yelena: Why don't you just take your turn, Bob?

Bob: I will put my A down to make 'a'.

Ava: I will add onto your 'a' to make 'at'.

Alexei: I will add onto your 'at' to make 'rat'.

Bucky: I will add onto your 'rat' to make 'biostratographic'.

Walker: [knocks the board onto the floor]

[lucca-stateofmind]

Johnny Storm (MCU) X OC

Alright so, I've decided to post the story onto here!

I wanted to give you guys a little sneak peek, for the book that will be released after the Fantastic 4 movie (current estimated release date: August 8th, 2025)

кошмар - Nightmare

"Снова"

"Снова"

The Russian instructor says to the young girls lined up, between ages 6 and 13.

They begin to start their routine again, trying to reach perfection.

He then sighs again as he sees a few of the younger ones falling behind, but this time he walks up to the girls and tells them to wait in the other room.

Katalina doesn't look as they walk out the room, as she knows what's going to happen to them. So instead she keeps her head up high and her posture perfectly still.

"Снова" He says as he walks out of the room and leaves the girls to practice themselves.

After a few minutes Katalina sees the girls, a few years younger than her, walk in holding back tears, as she notices the faint red marks on their hands.

As the Instructor tells them to continue, the girls continue the routine flawlessly.

-

Katalina sits at a table along with the other girls, as a gun and it's ammo sits in front of them.

"Начать"

The girls then begin to quickly load the gun, trying their bests to finish the task quicker than the others.

Katalina then raises her hand almost instantly, and the Instructor holds up their hand and she moves off to the side as the man tells the young girls to place their hands on the table.

They all put their hands, palms up on the cold wooden table, as he takes out a whip.

All Katalina can do is just watch

The scars The screams

She remembers it all

-

She wakes in a cold sweat, immediately looking around the room, hand around the knife that she keeps next to her bed just in case.

As she scans the room she calms herself down as she realizes she's still in her bedroom at the Watchtower.

She then grabs her notebook and writes down the dream, knowing full well her therapist is going to want to hear about the nightmare in the morning.

"So you still see them?"

The girl nods, as she looks at the notebook in the older woman's hand, it was not her decision to have a therapist but the pardon she and Bucky had gotten came with the condition of this weekly therapy session.

"How many more of these sessions do I have until we're done?" Katalina sighs, clearly feed up with the sessions "Until the President deems it fit that you no longer need them, but it's clear to me after today you still do" she says handing back the notebook to the damaged russian girl she met a few months back.

"How often do you have these nightmares? And don't say once every blue moon because no normal person would've filled this notebook out in 2 weeks" The older woman says, already knowing what Katalina was going to respond.

Katalina sighs and rolls her eyes as she looks out the window, clearly not wanting to answer that question. Not until she sees the older lady bring out her pen and paper and begin scribbling something down, "Oh cmon...seriously? Look I'm fine, yes I have nightmares every night. But it doesn't mean I'll go back to the my old ways"

"But you have every reason to. The government didn't help you, you lost your sister, and you were raised to be a weapon. So I'd say the chances of you going back to your ways are very high. Look...I'm not saying you are but the risk is still there, and that's why I'm here, but I can't help you unless you open up to me. I'm only trying to help you Katalina"

"It's never the same nightmare twice" She says, after a few beats of silence "it's always a different memory, some from training others from missions. But the one I repeatedly get is the day I came back, along with everyone else, and finding out she's gone. I lost 5 years with her, only to come back and find out everything has changed. But I guess I'm not fully alone, I still have Yelena....and Bucky"

"And your team"

Katalina scoffs "we're not a team, we're just a group of people that are forced to work together now, hell we don't even like each other most of the time"  "But they're all you have now. Everyone in your team has been deemed a lost cause, yet here you all are, continuing to keep us safe"

Katalina looks out the window and she speaks, and she can't help but wonder if all of this is a good sign that she can finally move on. Or if it's all just a temporary illusion to some life filled with happiness that she can never hold.

-

"What the hell is that?"

"A ship....I think"

"Yelena zoom in"

"Yeah that's definitely a ship"

The New Avengers stare at the screen in confusion as they see a ship, with a gigantic 4 painted on the side, heading to earth.

"Where is it landing?"

"Im not sure" Yelena says as she types something into the tablet

"It's landing a few miles east"

They all turn to look at Yelena, as she shows the trajectory of the ship, and shows the landing point at an empty field . The team then quickly scrambles to get their gear and head for the jet.   

This is just the prologue, where I wanted you all to meet the OC of the story. Her name is Katalina Petrova, and she is the adopted sister of Natasha and Yelena.

I will be releasing more information, and fun extras like the soundtrack and mood boards for the story as the release date gets closer.

I hope you all look foward to this book, because I know I am!!

[lucca-stateofmind]

steve stans pmo almost made me forget how significant this moment will be for dustin "I'm-losing-myself-in-grieving-my-older-brother-figure-on-top-of-survivor-guilt" henderson </3

[lucca-stateofmind]

[lucca-stateofmind]

I love being a nerd because what do you mean I am home alone for two weeks and the only think I plan to do is a marvel marathon??

[lucca-stateofmind]

“you might wake up and notice you’re someone you’re not” -> you might die trying to save the world and wake up resurrected as a puppet for a fascist regime that maintains the order you died trying to disrupt. oh and also you’re stuck in a time loop.

[lucca-stateofmind]

Well, folks, the numbers are in. We're in a committed relationShip with @ao3org, and it's called...drumroll...TagTeam! ao3blr was a VERY close second, so go ahead and use that tag too, ya crazy kids.

[lucca-stateofmind]

More Tumblr x AO3 art. Anyone else remember when the archive was in the hospital for like 3 days? Yeahahahah that was scary

...also AO3 would get stabbed and then say 'im sorry for the mess' dksflakdfj;as

[lucca-stateofmind]

PREACH.

i rewatched thunderbolts so. here are my thoughts on accountability and the New Avengers.

First I want to say, anyone saying Bucky (or the rest of the team) don’t have a choice but to be Val’s Avengers are wrong. We don’t even know if Val is still working with/directing this group. Also, all of these people could walk away. I know that in terms of wanting to be better people and better heroes, maybe this is the best chance they have.

But also… they could have gone to Sam. They could have testified at Val’s impeachment and revealed the truth to the public that Val manipulated them and coerced them into ‘coming out’ as the New Avengers without consent, and that they have since said ‘no, thank you’ and are walking away. All of these people have autonomy. Three (four?) of their main character arcs before Thunderbolts were extremely focused on autonomy. So yes, we can acknowledge it’s unfair and wrong the way things are playing out, and still remember that these (fictional) characters can be held accountable. Multiple times in discussions with friends I have brought up how Val’s hearing is still going on, and Bucky, while definitely having trouble of his own with congress, has enough connections to get them on the stand.

Second of all, I don’t think Val needs a redemption arc. She ignores ethics and morals in the name of power and defense and does a really good job at infuriating the audience. Which is the point of her character. Julia is an incredible actress and her work as Val is so intriguing to me. I love the concept of her character but watching the story play out still does make me mad at Valentina because hey that’s not cool! She started multiple fires and then when they were put out by people she was actively fighting against, she took the credit! It’s not okay. But still, I don’t want a ‘Val redemption arc’, I want to see a complex female villain.

Third of all, everybody needs to stop hating on and villainizing Sam, not only because he wasn’t in the damn movie but also because all of the genuine hate is coming from two lines in the end-credits scene*. I walked out of the theater assuming the majority of people (my bad, y’all) would understand that any sort of conflict over The Avengers is 99.9% definitely due to a misunderstanding and lack of communication. Probably also because Sam has risked his life and freedom, his job, everything to fight with Steve to keep the government from controlling the Avengers in Civil War. There isn’t a single incarnation of Captain America that would be okay with the U.S. government dictating the actions of the Avengers, not only because the Avengers defend Earth (not just the U.S.) but also because the U.S. government, in fiction and reality, are not always forthcoming or trustworthy about their intents and agendas.

On the topic of Sam, yes the divorce jokes are very funny haha. I simply don’t understand where the whole ‘Bucky and Sam hate each other now!’ is coming from, considering they made it very clear in TFATWS and the credits scene of BNW that they’re friends, at the very least. To me, they read more like family, but that’s just my opinion.

Fourth of all, I think this film has brought out the worst in a lot of fans while still being a good movie. I enjoyed the moments of levity and the weight of scenes, especially Yelena’s scenes acknowledging her mental health and how Lewis portrayed Bob’s bipolar. Florence and Lewis knocked it out of the park and I’m interested to see where they will take Yelena and Bob’s characters from here, because I really do see a lot of potential from both of them. Hannah’s performance as Ava Starr means the world to me, from AMATW to Thunderbolts. I have always loved Ghost and I always will.

I’m hoping Marvel doesn’t see Thunderbolts as a failure (because of box office numbers) and decide to completely do a 180 on all these character’s development — they all have their issues as well as their good traits but as characters (emphasis on: these are fictional people) I think it’s important to acknowledge that all of them are nuanced and have done bad things. A lot of people hate Alexei for participating in the Red Room, and yes, obviously, that’s bad and he should feel sorry and guilty over it. He is also trying his hardest to be a hero and make it up to Yelena, and we still haven’t seen a lot of his backstory, but we can definitely infer that the Red Room was not good (or probably a voluntary choice) to/for anyone but Dreykov. So there’s that. I’m not getting into John Walker in this post because people have already torn his character apart and you can find those analysis elsewhere.

*Now i’m aware I have made joking posts about Sam’s Avenger’s lineup that came off wrong. I didn’t realize the extent of Sam hate going on from fans at that time and wouldn’t have posted that if I knew anyone would see it as anything other than light-hearted. Sam Wilson is an incredible character, even outside of his role as Captain America and I really hope we get to see more of his perspective and Sam-focused plot lines in the future. Anthony Mackie, as always, does a wonderful job at playing him and I can’t wait for Doomsday to see who’s on his team.

and heavy on the ‘No more Sam hate please’ — the treatment of Anthony post-thunderbolts is the entire reason why my marvel obsession is limited to my little corner of the internet where i watch the films and read the comics and then occasionally write about them. i did a deep dive last night into the sam wilson and sambucky tags and y’all need to get a grip. sam and bucky are two of my favourite marvel characters and anthony and sebastian have done a great job at playing their dynamics and growth throughout the movies. the people on this godforsaken website who are either 1. absolving bucky of any responsibility for the events of thunderbolts/the apparent 14 months afterwards, 2. casting sam as some sort of unfeeling villain, or 3. writing fics where sam is only apologizing and changing his own morals/values just to resolve the rift (?) between him and bucky, i beg of you please take a look around you. putting characters in situations for fanfiction is one thing but when ‘sam wrong/bucky right’ has become a trend then maybe it’s not the best story to tell. my thunderbolts posts, reading them in the context of all that’s going on with sam rn, do not read the way i intended for them to read.

okay that’s it. tldr: the New Avengers should be held accountable (by fans and in-world) for their actions if they’re still letting Val/the government control them; Val doesn’t need a redemption arc because we need more complex female villains and also I want to see where they’ll take her character w/o a redemption; everyone needs to stop hating on Sam Wilson and check yourself, and also let’s stop pretending we know anything about what’s going on in Doomsday; the entire Sam vs. Bucky debate is based on what will probably amount to ‘neither of them will talk about it/find middle ground’; and Thunderbolts ahas brought out the worst in a lot of fans while at its core still hosting a cast of complex, interesting characters.

[lucca-stateofmind]

I don't care if this is real or not, i want this to be known as "having a rowling"

[lucca-stateofmind]

fuuuuck i just realized that the future idealized version of myself cant exist without current me being the catalyst for change and doing hard things. has anybody heard about this

[lucca-stateofmind]

dogs might look like their owners but cat people always have a cat with the same mental illness as them

[lucca-stateofmind]

[lucca-stateofmind]

tbh disappointing that christian horner got sacked because of poor performance and not his sexual assault allegations but… oh well!

[lucca-stateofmind]

there are people who started following f1 after watching the movie and witnessed a messy rainy race as their first gp, a backmarker car on the podium and a team principal randomly being fired all in the span of 10 days