magic-tape

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Reasons why Dropout raised their pricing:

- to get Jake that 100k

- to get Robert Reich

- afford a Ranboo cameo that’s only talked about in the BTS

- Brennan’s departure video

- Buying Sam’s house back from Vic

- Try Guys cameo

- Hot People, Big Tobacco, and Mr Money Bags fees

- Blurring Katie’s feet

- Magnifying Ify’s feet

- Who Wants to Be a Millionaire inspired stage

- Hush money for Angela Giarratana. She knows what she did

- Elaine Carroll appearance fee

- “Kiss From A Rose” license

- Giant Wheel

- Custom shirts for Crowd Control

- Hype squad on “One and Done”

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theres only way one to end this feud: rolling a perfect 6

(from brennan's interview with variety)

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two reich's don't make a wrong

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my cat was named after Bill Seacaster btw

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some of my favorite screenies from the Fantasy High Webtoon since I just got caught up :3

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my players are toting around a talking statue that they call daddy. it can talk but not move it is a statue

despite this i get SO many questions. "can daddy dance?" "can daddy help me with this?" and every time i have to go "he is a statue"

the campaign didnt have rails in the first place but rheyve taken it into their own hands. they NEED to turn him human apparently (and find him a wife??? they Really want that statue to get bitches. he is hundreds of years old)

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and of course i have goose penis,

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screenshottinf so i can make this ask 2 separate posts (ill do #2 later)

im gonna be going off of the 2014 phb races for this

AND im not voing to be giing into subraces either because nobody wants to be here for a billion years

im gonna mostly rank them based on utility BUUUT because anything i say depends and this is all based off personal opinion dont take it as gospel !!! every race has a fun factor !!!! also, above anything else I'm rating on versatility within the base rules! if you made a really cracked dragonborn cleric thats awesome, but its base stuff doesnt lend itself well to clericing. yeah? yeah

THAT SAID, LETS GET INTO IT

in last place is gnome. they arent offering a lot in terms of traits & pretty exclusively offer themselves to rogue and wizard

8th place goes to dragonborn . they get bonus points for the damage resistance but i dont think the breath weapon (one of the biggest draws of the race imo) is that good? i really like dragons but i feel like trait-wise this falls flat

7th half-orc. they only really work as barbs or fighters. the only reason theyre higher tuan the other 2 is because of relentless endurance. that can really come in clutch

6th? human. sooo middle of the road. not bad but not good, versatile but boring

5th goes to elf for being a little less versatile (cant really do any strength-based build) BUT at least its more interesting than human

4th may surprise you ! half-elf. i KNOW what youre thinking. "bee didnt you just dog on elf and hjman why is half-elf above them" BECAUSE ITS BEST OF BOTH WORLDS. versatility of human and fun traits of elf

TOP 3!!!+

dwarf !!! i loooove me a damage resistance yessir ! they might struggle some w high CHA builds but i really love a race that can do martial classes and spellcasting classes with relative ease

and our top 2... ARE TIED!!!! its my tierlist i can do what i want

halfling. dexterity is almost universally useful and lucky and brave are SOOO GOATED

and tiefling. resistande to one of the most common enemy damage types? yes plesse !!!! plus . just sexy . lets be so real here guys

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the mark mercer matt mercer thing is getting so bad im beginning to forget which one is his actual name

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‘My darling paramour, my infernal flame, my Figueroth.

I sent these meteors to you from the dawn of time, when a rogue asteroid almost hit my dad’s jet ski. Sundering the space rock with but a gesture of my most potent art, the debris surrounded me and the sorrow of your absence. I sent these rocky chunks across the galaxy, and they have traveled since the beginning of time to tell you that I love you. Each moment of our mutual ignorance where we had yet to meet this message was already spinning its way to you time and space to illuminate the night sky, to tell you that I love you. Us, our love, like time, has been inevitable and strange. I have walked in its shadow joyfully. It gives me peace to know that my darkest moments, my love for you was already on its way, flying through the stars. We have been on our way to save us since before the lights of our world first lit. Pretty cool, my darling paramour.

P.S. I know you have another year of school after this, but I hope one day soon you and I might travel amongst the stars together. XOXO, Ayda Aguefort.’

And I’m just supposed to move on from this? Hello??

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gonna start shipping paul refereeno and evil jeremy culhane. like who gives a fuck anymore

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click here for my main blog

this is my d20/d&d blog

click here for my art blog

asks and messages and stuff will always be open unless I get big enough that people start sending me WEIRD shit

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changing my url from scutchythedm to magic-tape btw. for my 12 followers

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figayda comic based off another text convo I’ve had

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"sorry i called you a little mushroom man 🥺" <- also called him a four-eyed bitch and said she wanted to kill him

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GOOD MORNING GANG IT'S HEY GIRLIE DAY!!!!!!!!