maysileepevensie

[maysileepevensie]

Memories of the past

(Sorry for the inactivity😭)

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Lila, Cerise, Iris.

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the special was so good i love this freak

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this girl i am presenting to u right now has done nothing wrong ever

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love

ladynoir my love

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what is this breed of character called

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maysilee donner in my style 😭😜😜 mourning my goat

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no matter young Haymitch's characterization in Sunrise, I'm always going to be partial to the interpretation that he was a smart-ass punk who thought he knew better than everyone until he was crowned & punished.

the Games changed him, all right. they made him face death and finally flinch, finally see how small & finite his life was and that the world didn't care how clever he was or how above-it-all he acted.

one wrong move, one missed chance encounter with Maysilee, and he would've been dead. and no amount of bravado, or hat tricks, or snarky comebacks would've made any difference.

he went home without the innocence he came with, that he didn't know he'd had to begin with. he'd been so sure of himself. (he'd been so afraid.) he was smarter than the other tributes. (the girl looked like an airhead but she was bigger than him and just as fast, and she'd-)

47 50 other people had to die for young Haymitch to learn he didn't know anything about anything, actually.

because what's more, he had a debt bigger than his own life to pay when he got home. he hadn't expected that. I imagine it took him by surprise. I imagine he felt angry and guilty and powerless, with unimaginable sorrow that cut him down to size... as very small, & stupid, & only sixteen.

imagine that as a coming of age.

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I’m ok, I’m fine, I’ve been handling Sunrise on the Reaping very well -I’ve been crying non stop.

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when your circle small but y’all doomed by the narrative

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"You are a product of everyone who came before you."

Lucy Gray, Lenore Dove, Maysilee Donner, Katniss Everdeen.

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things maysilee donner would've loved:

pushing drusilla down the escalator

kissing girls

cyberbullying

pinterest

selling handmade jewelry on etsy

johanna mason

CINNA.

judging people's outfits at the met gala

panem's next top model

and last but certainly not least: watching president snow die!!!

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meanest girl in town

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thinking about maysilee and merrilee (SOTR spoilers)

i remember when my aunt died, and my mom, who isn’t a twin but looked exactly like her sister, was mistaken for her. how at the funeral people did a double take when they saw her. my mom was 47 and it was hard enough on her.

especially about how haymitch saw merrilee and thought she was maysilee. how for the rest of her life, she is a constant reminder of what district 12 lost in the quarter quell. that part hit SO close to home for me i had to take a moment.

and thinking about poor merrilee, who at 16 had to go through that. every time she looked in the mirror, she saw her sister, her twin. when her friends looked at her, they saw maysilee. how devastating that must of been to her.

how her parents must have called her maysilee at least once. and that what was once a silly, kind of annoying slip is now devastating for everyone.

it makes me so fucking sad especially because i’ve witnessed what that kind of loss does to someone.

like i cannot stop thinking about the effects maysilee’s death had on merrilee and her parents. it’s been keeping me up at night.

(the entire book has, actually)

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Suzanne Collins number one Maysilee Donner defender