md7tf

[md7tf]

Ke Ola Maikai (The Good Life)

(Inspired my recent trip to Hawaii)

Adam’s vacation was off to “great” start with his hotel room not being ready and getting completely sunburnt on his first day. 

He had barely sat down when a smiling bartender put a drink in front of him. “You look like you could use a strong drink, this one’s on the house. It’s called Ke Ola Maikai… the good life. Guaranteed to wash away your worries and let you enjoy island life, brah.”

To be honest, Adam really did need a drink and this one tasted amazing. After only a few sips the sting of his sunburn and the stress of the day began to fade away… 

Several hours and quite a few drinks later, Akamu was shirtless out on the dance floor as usual. He loved his life here on the island, showing off his perfectly tanned muscles for the tourists. There was never a shortage of men and women wanting to bring an island kāne back to their hotel room for a little fun. He really was living the good life.

[md7tf]

Bro’s Brewing - St Patty’s Day Beer Bust

Daniel, Ken, and Brad decided they needed an after work drink and walked over to the neighborhood bar forgetting that it was St. Patrick’s Day. Outside the bar was a sign reading “St. Patty‘s Day Beer Bust sponsored by Bro’s Brewing” and a few frat boys well on their way to getting drunk.

The three stood outside the bar for a short while debating whether to go in, before deciding they would grab a quick drink and head out before the drunken chaos started ramping up.

Ken and Brad sat down to the table, well Daniel went to grab them drinks from the bar. The bar started getting more crowded and Brad was just about to go see what was taking Daniel so long when a rowdy young Irish guy walked up to their table carrying two bright green beers… and not wearing a shirt!

“Drenk up lads! It's de 'ouse special fahr St.  Paddy’s day!” He thrust the two beers into their hand and stood there grinning at them.

Ken and Brad looked at each other, then the beers, then the oddly familiar man grinning at them, and finally back at each other. Just as Brad was about to refuse the drinks, he noticed that Ken was already taking a sip of the beer and before realizing what he was doing… Brad too had lifted the pint glass to his lips and taken a drink. The cool refreshing brew washed away their fatigue from the day replacing it with a pleasant fogginess of their minds. 

Danny watched with anticipation and a growing stiffness in his pants as his two friends experienced the same change he had when the bartender insisted he a chug a beer at the bar… Years melted away,  strength surged through the body as muscles grew, worry replaced with confidence, thoughts of career replaced with a desire for all the carnal pleasures life has to offer. 

Danny gave his two mates a right hungry look. Kennan an' Brady were proper ginger rides, and he'd sure have a grand ole time with 'em back at his flat later tonight.

But for now, he gave 'em a cheeky grin and led 'em back to the bar for another round as the pub started to liven up with more an’ more fine lads showing’ up. 

With all the lads an' hormones buzzin' about, it wasn't long before things began to sizzle. 

It was lookin' like a grand night for a bit o' fun!

Happy St. Patrick’s Day!

[md7tf]

Bro’s Brewing - Daytona Beach Pilsner

Charles, Rodney, and Daniel had been best friends for years.  So Charles hadn’t questioned it when he had received a text from Rodney telling him to meet him at the local beach as right now. 

When he arrived, he found the normally quiet beach was full of people drinking and having a party. Before he could even begin to look for Rodney, he heard somebody shout his name. He turned to see a very attractive guy walking straight towards him… Yet there was something vaguely familiar about the guy.

Before Charles could ask anything,  the guy thrust a a shiny green can into his hand saying “There you are! You’re just in the time, the party is really picking up. Drink up bro!”

It was a can of something called Daytona Beach Pilsner from Bro’s Brewing.

Charles tried to politely decline saying he didn’t really drink, but he was soon surrounded by a bunch of rowdy frat guys chanting “Chug! Chug! Chug!” And it was obvious they weren’t gonna let him slip away without taking a drink. 

Hesitantly, Charles took a small sip of the beer… and surprisingly it actually wasn’t that bad. So we took another sip, and then another. Before he realized it, he had drank the entire can and let out a tiny little burp. The guys surrounding him all started laughing and the same guy from earlier  thrusting TWO beers into his hands saying “Is that all you got?”

Charles once again hesitated, but as his head started to feel a little foggy and the guys around him resumed chanting “chug”… he started to drink the next can.

This time after he finished, he let all the loud BELCH and immediately started chugging the next beer as the guys cheered him on.

As soon as he finished a can, somebody would hand him another beer and he would started to chug the next can. And with each can his belch grew longer and louder… BUUUUUUUUUURP! 

It wasn’t long before Chad had chugged an entire six pack having to play catch-up after showing up late to the party. But damn did get few good belchs out of it! “The Chadster is ready to PARTY!!”

From behind him somebody shouted “Now there’s the Chad I know. That was epic!!” He turned to find the guy that had handed him the first beer when he had arrived… no,  not just any guy… his best bro Rod who had told him about the party. 

“Rod my man, this party is hoppin’! Where is Danny? He’s missing all the fun. I got a text him to get his ass over here.”

And so Chad pulled out his phone to send a quick message to Danny before grabbing another beer with Rod and heading off to join the party.

[md7tf]

BroTech EVO:1

Jared returned to his desk after lunch to find a package sitting on his desk labeled “BroTech” and he vaguely remember clicking on an ad for the company about a week ago.  Opening the box, he saw that it was a fitness track “EVO:1 - Motivate, Grow, Evolve.”

Jared had always been on the heavy side and this wasn’t the first health fad he had bought into, but he figured it couldn’t hurt to try yet again. With no specific instructions, he took the tracker out of the box and put it on.

As soon as he had it around his wrist, he felt a tingling sensation run up his arm as messages appeared on the screen…

“Beginning full body fitness analysis….”

“Analysis complete. Calculating optimal fitness evolution path…”

“Complete. Click below to start your fitness evolution now!”

Jared clicked on large “Start” button and… nothing happened.  A little disappointed, he went back to work and quickly forgot about the tracker. 

As the end of his workday approached , the EVO:1 buzzed and displayed a message saying “Time to workout!” Again he felt a tingling sensation run up his arm the spread through his an entire body.  As it had been a long day, he dismissed the message  just wanting to wrap up work and go home. But the more he tried to concentrate on work, the harder became.  He felt like he had just drank a dozen shots of espresso and was having trouble sitting still or concentrating. Finally he couldn’t take it anymore and remembering he had a change of clothes in the car, Jared headed off to the office gym. 

Jared couldn’t remember the last time he had stepped foot in a gym as he had never been very active and was a little intimidated. Luckily the EVO:1 guided him through each exercise and soon he realized that he was actually was enjoying the workout. 

Over the next few days, he began to fall into a routine of morning cardio and evening weight training all motivated by his EVO:1 and it’s comforting tingling reminders. He found himself focusing more and more on his fitness. Spending extra time in the gym instead of playing video games or watching Netflix.  He couldn’t believe how quickly things had changed for him and the progress he was making. 

Within a week, he felt like a whole new man… he felt energized and was crushing his workouts. He could hardly remember the days of wanting to sleep in and not hitting the gym. 

Folks at the office began to compliment  and even flirt with him… women and the men alike! And he LOVED the attention. He quickly began gaining the swagger and confidence to match his new physique. 

Every morning he woke to a reminder from his EVO:1 to check his progress. And as the now familiar tingly pleasure spread through his body, he would admire his naked body in the mirror with it beautiful pecs, bulging biceps, and rock hard abs. But as beautiful as his body was, he wanted more… To have more muscle. To grow bigger still.

Working out as much as he did, Jared quickly out grew the equipment available at the office gym. He soon found himself joining a gym focused on weight lifting allowing him workout harder and continue growing bigger.  He soon stopped hanging out with friends and co-worker, instead starting to spend more time with guys from the gym. 

And it wasn’t long afterward that he quite his stuffy office job to focus on bodybuilding and became a regular in the bodybuilding competition circuit within a few months. His life now revolved around perfecting his physique with his old life being a distance memory. Jared had evolved to become the perfect muscle bro… and he couldn’t be happier. 

[md7tf]

A Picture is Worth a 1000 Reps

Jackson couldn’t wait to show his friend Ronald the vintage Polaroid camera he found at a local thrift store. The shopkeeper had spun a wild story of how the camera had been used by some famous photographer to take photos a bodybuilder in the 60s. He knew Ronald would find the story hilarious. 

When they met up at the park after classes finished, Jackson told Ronald the ridiculous story the shopkeeper had told him. Noticing that there was still filming the camera, Ronald jokingly struck one of those stupid bodybuilding poses and said “Hey Jackson, go ahead and take a photo of the newest up-and-coming heavyweight champion.”

As they were waiting for the photo to develop, Jackson noted that something looked odd about the photo. It didn’t really look like his friend and instead looked more like one of those bodybuilders the shopkeeper had mentioned. 

A second later he heard his friend ask if it was getting warm and that he was feeling a bit lightheaded. When Jackson turned to see what was wrong, he was shocked to see Ronald looking exactly like the bodybuilder in the photo! Bulging muscles and all!

Ronald exclaimed  “What just happened?!?This is amazing! I mean, look at these muscles! Jax, you have to let me take your picture.” Jackson couldn’t believe his eyes, and did Ronald just call him Jax? Before he could ask what was going on, his friend had grabbed the camera and snapped a picture of him. 

Worried, Jackson immediately grabbed the photo and anxiously waited for it to develop. With a sinking filling in the pit of his stomach, he noticed the same oddities with his photo as he had with his friend’s. 

Suddenly he felt warm and was having trouble concentrating. His clothes started feeling tighter as waves of pleasure washed over his body and his muscles began to grow. It felt… it felt good … so good as he ran his fingers along his well defined muscles. What had he been worried about? “Ronnie, you’re right, this is fucking amazing!”

The mysterious camera was left forgotten on a park bench as Jax and Ronnie headed back to the dorm room for a quick “cardio” session in the bedroom before hitting the gym for their evening workout.