medusas-boytoy - Tumblr blog

[medusas-boytoy]

Actually kind of really like that if you don’t marry any marriage candidates they’re already in like pairs. Like they work together and they work well. like Elliott/Leah Abigail/Sebastian Sam/Penny Shane/Emily Haley/Alex Maru/Harvey And even the non-marriage candidates for that matter like Pam and Gus lol and during the flower dance or some other festival Marlon hints that he’s into Marnie which is sad because she’s with that loser Lewis, the whole fiasco with the Wizard and his ex witch wife,,,,,,, relationships are pretty fun in this game

[medusas-boytoy]

Saving our friend Jas…

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I also love how the wizard just straight up drugs you

[medusas-boytoy]

So my family has a Gay Pirate Plate.

Stay with me.

We do not know how the hell the Gay Pirate Plate was first acquired. This being a point of contention is actually pretty plot-relevant; the saga of the Gay Pirate Plate began with my grandmother and her sister, who, for some ungodly reason, both BADLY wanted the Gay Pirate Plate and believed it to be rightfully theirs.

I should back up, firstly, to establish: The Gay Pirate Plate is the cheapest, tackiest, ugliest plate in existence.

It is in no way a collector’s item. It is physically impossible for it to complement anyone’s decor, because the colors in it are garish. It’s just a ceramic plate with a gay pirate painted on it, and the painting is, this cannot be emphasized enough, extremely bad.

(How do we know the pirate is gay if he’s just posing on a plate? Listen. Fully 100% to stereotype, but he is. He is gay. There’s an energy. That pirate is a flaming homosexual. That pirate has sex with men and does it frequently. That pirate is fucking gay, all right, he just is.)

Anyway. The point is that this is an extremely cheap and ugly plate with a poorly-executed painting of pirate on it who is like a nine on the Kinsey scale.

My grandmother and her sister fought a blood feud over this plate for their entire lives. It would be on the wall in my grandma’s house, and then her sister would visit, and then it would be gone. She’d visit her sister and the plate would be on the wall and her sister would pretend it had always been there. She would steal it back, hang it up, and, when her sister visited, pretend it had always been there. This continued for DECADES.

When the sister died, the Gay Pirate Plate lived triumphantly in my grandmother’s house. And then my grandmother died. And my aunt, who had lived with her and been her carer throughout her life, rightfully inherited their house.

We visit my aunt after the funeral and stay with her for a week or two.

Me, my sister, and our dad. Her brother.

The three of us look at each other. We don’t say anything. We studiously avoid making eye contact with the Gay Pirate Plate mounted proud and ugly on the wall. We notice one another studiously avoiding looking at it. We notice one another noticing. We say nothing. We come to a silent consensus. We pack up to leave. We get in the van. Our aunt comes out to say goodbye. I loudly announce I need to use the restroom before we leave. She obviously stays outside to continue talking to my dad.

I take down the Gay Pirate Plate, stuff it under my oversized sweatshirt, go outside, and get in the van. She happily waves goodbye as we drive off.

Two days later my dad gets a phone call that opens with hysterical laughter and “You FUCKING ASSHOLE did you seriously STEAL THE PLATE–”

Anyway. The gay pirate plate lives in my dad’s house currently.

But he’s trying to get me and my sister out to visit him. And plate mounts are cheap.

[medusas-boytoy]

discrete mwacko for the stinko

[medusas-boytoy]

sigh.....coming home after a long day of farming and tending to animals to see Shane in a frilly pink apron trying to make something new and fancy but you can tell he's burning something.

cooking with him wearing matching frilly aprons, dinner isnt burning anymore and is instead simmering warmly <3

[medusas-boytoy]

i unironically love stardew valleys beta portraits

[medusas-boytoy]

i think im in love with him

[medusas-boytoy]

hey! if you don't mind, can you draw the other bachelors? or if you don't have the time, just alex is fine!

Of course! :) i've been wanting to draw them for a pretty long time now

I'ts my first time ever drawing them so i am still figuring out their looks in my style :)

And as a bonus:

I just have to draw them in this iconic pose yk

Reference:

[medusas-boytoy]

Meet farmer Neo! He likes dogs and adopting strays..

[medusas-boytoy]

oh. ok shane

[medusas-boytoy]

Lines of Shane dialogue that live in my head rent free...

Shane is easily one of my favourite characters of all time now... He's such a sweetheart!! When you first meet him he's so standoffish and rude, but if you pursue his friendship, you quickly learn that, because of his depression and anxiety, his initial rudeness is a defense mechanism. He's just trying not to get hurt. When you get to know him more, you get to see how he's kind to kids, kind to animals, and how the only person he really despises is himself. He uses humour to cope and has trouble confronting his own feelings but as he feels more and more comfortable with you, he opens up drastically and does a 180 really. He still struggles with his depression and alcoholism from time to time but I like that about his character, he shows that recovery isn't clean or linear, but he tries so hard, and he makes sure to show you how hard he's trying. I really appreciate him as a character, honestly. I love that as he grows attached to the player he begins to show how he's incredibly gentle and affectionate, and living on a farm, becoming the farmer's house husband, is the happiest possible ending for him!! He is a fantastic character and I hate to see so much dislike for him but I think it really depends on how you interpret his actions and feelings. I think that at his core he has the softest heart of all the marriage candidates, and he just puts up walls of defense because he doesn't want to be hurt any more than he already is. Anyway, that's my Shane appreciation post, I hope you all agree

[medusas-boytoy]

is this an abscure ship?? I feel like Alex would looove Shane or Penny

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raccoon bf doing his farm work

[medusas-boytoy]

you ask gay people to show you their favorite stardew valley bachelor/bachelorette and they pull out an emo, a cottagecore redhead, and/or an alcoholic

[medusas-boytoy]

I wanna date the mean little chicken man!!!!

((I.D.: a short five panel stardew valley comic in shades of grayish blue, titled "First time playing stardew..." The first panel shows the farmer character, excitedly looking at a to do list. They are short with dark skin, curly hair pulled in a ponytail with 2 braids dangling at their temples, and wearing simple overalls.

Farmer: "This game is so cute! And all the characters are so sweet and friendly! I've heard you can date some of them, but I'll wait until I've gotten the hang of things."

Second panel: the farmer sees Shane's back, stomping up the street ahead of them. He's got dark messy hair, and his jacket has a few holes and tears visible. He looks angry, but the farmer doesn't notice.

Farmer, smiling: "oh, I think that's the character that was working earlier. Maybe I can talk to him now?"

Third panel: a close up of Shane's face. He looks super annoyed, with bags under his eyes, and unkempt facial hair.

Farmer: hello, I'm-

Shane: I don't know you. Why are you talking to me???

Fourth panel: The farmer stands in the middle of the sidewalk, hands balled into little fists, mouth open in an offended gasp!!!

Fifth panel: the same image of the offended farmer, this time blushing deeply, clutching a bouquet of flowers in their fist and holding it out towards the viewer (shane). There are little hearts and sparkles filling the panel around the farmer.

End of I.D.))

[medusas-boytoy]

You will. be seeing a lot of Shane on here . This is my babygirl