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hi. fuck ice. here is how you can help families affected by unlawful deportation

edit: and FUCK LAPD. here is how you can help bail out protestors who are in the trenches, facing mass arrests and putting their bodies on the line.

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A Burning Hill

characters kang sunhye (misun), lee donghyuck (haechan), kang jaesuk, lee haewon, brief mentions of other idols

words 2.3k

warnings idk none misun’s just a hater and a fourteen year old girl

2014

Keep it cool, Misun, Key’s words echoed in her head.

      Maybe he would like a meal treated on her? (That she’d begrudgingly get the money from her father.) Or maybe a favor he can check in whenever? She just knows she’s going to have to give him a good apology once she’s finally let out of this damn room like a kid in trouble.

      Which, to be fair, she is.

      Their vocal coach, Solbin, stared down at the two teenagers who were both avoiding her gaze, nervously picking at their fingers. They let it go too far this time. Usually, Misun could control herself to not blow up on Haechan, but Haechan was just so irritating and he provoked her constantly. Was she supposed to just sit there and take it?

      In fact, the constant belittling from him made her think of her mother. It wasn’t something she liked to think of a lot, especially when she wasn’t even with her mother right now. But unlike with her mother, she didn’t get upset and want to crawl under her blankets. She got angry.

      It was easier to defend herself against Haechan, a stranger, than her own mother. How was that? She shouldn’t be afraid to tell her mother anything.

      “This is the sixth time this month you’ve gotten in trouble for being a distraction,” Solbin sighs, bringing a hand to her forehead to rub it. Misun was starting to feel bad, but it wasn’t her fault. It wasn’t.

      The two of them stayed quiet.

      “How will you two ever debut if you can’t even do the simplest thing and keep your mouths shut?” She tries to look them in the eyes but neither will look up. “So now you two decide to stay quiet?”

      “We’re sorry,” Misun says, deciding the best route would be to apologize first. It always is.

      “We—”

      “You’ll do better next time, I know,” Solbin presses her lips together. “You said that the last time, Donghyuck-ah.”

      Haechan ducks his head down. Misun tries to be a fly on the wall, but Solbin isn’t letting her go freely.

      “Sunhye, you’re better than this. What happened?”

      A short breath leaves her lips, diverting her attention to a poster of SHINee. Did Taemin have to deal with this, too? What would he do if he were in her position? Actually . . . maybe it’d be better to ask what would Onew do . . .

      Her shoulders slump. He wouldn’t let it get to him.

      “Listen to me carefully,” Solbin steps away from the table, staring both of them down, “You are not special. You’re nothing.” Misun feels her mouth go dry. She looks down, feeling her heart clench painfully in her chest. “There are trainees here better than you— we can easily replace you with them.”

      Misun can no longer hear anything over the sound of her ears ringing, feeling her face get warm. Replaceable. That’s what she is.

      She didn’t dare look at Haechan or Solbin, keeping her chin tucked to her chest with tears burning in her eyes. Haechan didn’t speak.

      Solbin sighs, “I believe I got the point across. Go join your friends in the cafeteria. You can still get something if you hurry. Sorry for keeping you so long.”

      Misun stands on wobbly knees, bowing deeply and uttering in unison with Haechan, “Thank you, Kim Solbin-nim.” Her legs feel like lead as she makes her way out of the studio, hearing Haechan’s small footsteps behind her. She continues walking, even when she hears him stop.

      Haechan calls her name, probably to apologize, and she hears his footsteps growing faster and louder. She breaks into a run, passing employees who call out for her to slow down. She’s panting by the time she reaches the elevator, quickly pressing the button to go up. The hair on the back of her neck stands straight, sending a shiver down her spine. Someone is watching her. She turns around.

      Haechan is standing behind her, a guilty expression on his face and she huffs, rolling her eyes. He was always like this, always apologetic after they got into an argument. He would say all those things about her but then he’d act like he was sorry. She refuses to believe him anymore. She’s made that mistake multiple times before.

      “Go away,” she turns around as the elevator doors open and steps inside. Haechan doesn’t listen, following her inside the elevator despite her hastiness to press the ‘close door’ button. She groans as the door shuts with both of them in the elevator, alone. She regrets choosing the elevator. She presses the next floor, wanting to get out already.

      “What a coincidence that we’re both here,” Haechan smiles nervously at the floor and then her, smile faltering when his smile is met with a glare.

      “You followed me here,” she says.

      “No, I just needed to use the elevator,” Haechan responds quickly. “I wasn’t following you.”

      Misun’s cheeks flush in embarrassment, “Whatever.”

      “I– ah, I wanted to say I’m sorry,” Haechan can’t look her in the eye, staring down at the floor. She taps her foot on the floor, wishing the slow elevator would hurry up. “I was rude, and I shouldn’t have been.”

      She doesn’t respond, sighing in relief when the doors open at the next floor, “Leave me alone, Haechan. Your stupid sorrys don’t mean anything to you, or me.”

      Misun ends up in one of the empty girls’ restrooms on the tenth floor. She checks under the stalls before locking the main entrance. She pulls out her phone, the one her father got her and pays the bill for. She goes to her recents, scrolling down the short list.

      Her eyes pause on her mother’s name before skipping down to where a younger version of her brother smiled at her. She clicks the contact without a second thought, bringing it up to her ear to wait for him to pick up.

      It rings a couple of times before she hears the automated voicemail message and hangs up, immediately calling back again.

      After three rings, he picks up, “Hello?” His voice sounds tired, and she bites down on her lip, chewing at the skin. She didn’t know he was sleeping, it was three in the afternoon.

      “Hi,” Misun says, “Were you sleeping? I’m sorry.”

      “No,” Jaesuk clears his throat, seemingly to finally just realize who was on the phone. “Sunhye, what’s up? Are you OK?”

      “Just wanted to talk to someone who isn’t my competition,” she rests her head against the stall, looking down at her shoes, pristine, clean, and white. She clutches her phone tightly, yet to realize how hard her hand was shaking. “I miss you.”

      “I miss you, too,” she can hear the smile in Jaesuk’s voice and smiles, too, but it makes a wave of tears appear and it’s evident when she sniffs a second later. “Sunhye. What’s the matter? Do you want me to come up there and talk to—“

      “No!” Misun nearly shrieks, voice starting off loud and then lowering when she realizes how loud she was, “I’m fine. I don’t need my big brother coming all the way from his fancy studio to defend me. They already think I use you guys to get my way,” she sniffs, “I hate it here. Can’t I leave and come to YG?”

      “If you think SM is bad, I promise you, YG is worse,” he speaks in a hushed tone, as if Yang Hyunsuk would have his phone bugged and hear his words.

      “The older trainees are all really nice…” She sniffs, quickly wiping a few tears off her face. “And it’s not all of the younger ones, either. Some of them are really cool, like Ningning and Herin. The guys aren’t hard to get along with either, like Jaemin and you know, Mark. Jaemin’s really nice, and you already know about Mark.”

      “And the ones that aren’t really nice?” Jaesuk prods.

      Misun doesn’t say anything for a minute, wondering if Haechan was worth wasting her breath on. And then she decides that Haechan really got on her nerves, and Jaesuk was really the only one she could talk to about it. “Haechan!” 

      Jaesuk laughs, “Him? Again?” When she huffs and makes a noise of agreement, he laughs harder, “I’m starting to think this kid has a crush on you, Sunhye!”

      Misun makes a face, “You’re not funny.” What made him think Haechan had a crush on her based on everything she’s told him? Haechan was rude to her, he pulled her hair any chance he got, made fun of her any chance he got, and never stopped looking at her. She’d rather die. After brutally rejecting him, of course.

      “Come on, I know you’ve watched those dramas where the guy is mean to her when he actually likes her,” Jaesuk says. She makes a retching sound and he chuckles, “Don’t be like that.”

      “The day that Haechan likes me is the day the world will end,” she says stubbornly, no longer wanting to talk about him to Jaesuk anymore. His reaction disappointed her, thinking he’d take it seriously but it seemed as if she was wrong. She huffs, “I’ll talk to you later. Bye.” She hangs up without letting him get another word out. She frowns down at her phone before shoving it into her hoodie pocket.

      She leans against the wall of the stall, closing her eyes as a lump forms in her throat. Why could things never go her way? She hates the way she dreads going to the company to train. It really ruined her day. The only thing to solve her problem was to either make Haechan leave or leave herself. Why should she have to lose her dream just because Haechan couldn’t leave her alone? She doesn’t want to stop training, and she knew Haechan would never, either. But he has to leave. He has to, it can’t be her. She needs to be a star, just like her mother could’ve been. She has to show her mother what she missed out on.

      Misun hears a noise and her eyes open, listening more carefully. A loud knock at the bathroom door startles her, making her nearly jump out of her skin as a voice asks, “Hello?” There’s more muffled words behind the door, but she doesn’t hear as she quickly unlocks the stall to unlock the bathroom door.

      An unfamiliar set of girls are staring at her and she flushes, eyes darting to the floor and rushing past the group. She wipes at her eyes discreetly as she makes her way down to the cafeteria where she knows where some of the older girls will be. That was so embarrassing, she knew she should’ve left right away. She just hopes they don’t talk to anyone else about her locking herself in the bathroom by herself.

      When Misun passes a set of doors, her interest is piqued when she hears someone singing a familiar song. She quickly understands that it’s Baby by Justin Bieber and the person singing it is Haechan. He sounds good, something she begrudgingly can admit. Never to his face, she’ll always insist he’s a terrible singer in front of him. She stands slightly around the corner of the door frame, peeking in curiously to see Haechan is singing in front of Taeyong, Johnny, Jaehyun, and Ten. Her heart drops, creating a pit in her stomach. She crosses her arms, feeling upset at the fact that Johnny was listening to Haechan, too. She knows they were friends, too, but she was friends with Johnny first– doesn’t that mean something? She rolls her eyes at the situation, turning around before any of the group can spot her. At least Mark wasn’t here, too. She doesn’t know how he wasn’t since Haechan would never leave him alone, similar to her.

      “Where have you been?” A sudden voice makes her jump and she turns to see that it was Lee Haewon, a girl that also went to her school. The dark haired girl smiles apologetically, plump cheeks flushing, “Sorry! I’ve just been looking for you, and I couldn’t find you after Teacher took you away. I saved you some food! Hina told me what you liked so I got it for you.” She seems to realize she’s rambling, and the pink on her cheeks darken, “Sorry–” She catches herself going to talk more and stops herself.

      “It’s OK,” Misun can’t help but smile. She noticed she was gone? Did anyone else? She shakes that thought away, “Thank you, Haewon. Want to walk to the cafeteria together?”

      “Mind if we come with?” A loud voice says from behind them. Misun already knows who it is without turning, and she knows who else was with him, too. She huffs, not turning her head and still looking at Haewon.

      “We don’t care,” she mutters, ignoring the look of shock from Haewon at the disrespectful words. “Come on, Haewon.” Through her shock, Haewon still manages to keep up with Misun and turns around to walk with her.

      Misun can’t control her bitterness, it seems. Even if she knows what she feels is irrational, she can’t help but act out on her feelings. She feels uneasy as she walks away from the group of boys, not liking that she took her feelings out on someone who doesn’t deserve it. But it was too late to go back and apologize, not that she really would, anyway. She hated apologizing.

      “Are you OK?” Haewon whispers to her, casting a glance at her. Misun’s heart warms at the concern in her voice. She didn’t really know Haewon, and she was better friends with some of the other girls, but Haewon cared enough to find her. Misun smiles as she loops her arm through Haewon’s. Haewon seemed like a good friend, and Misun didn’t want to let the opportunity pass.

      “I’m OK,” Misun nods and smiles convincingly, “Is this OK?” She realizes she should’ve asked before touching her, but Haewon simply beams back at her before beginning to talk about drama she overheard from the older female trainees. Misun smiles more genuinely this time, appreciating the effort to distract her. But she can still feel someone staring at her. She doesn't mean to, but she looks behind her. Haechan's eyes meet hers and she curses in her head, but glares back at him before turning her head back around.

Stupid Haechan.

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Hello friends, supporters, and EveryTumblr, Today I have tragic news I want to share with you. We started our day with new evacuation orders for our displacement area 💔 This will be the 13th time of evacuating and fleeing from a real danger with my family, and everytime is harder than the previous one I almost can take my breaths, to bear a new displacement!!! Even the tents are worn out and cannot be dismantled and installed in a new place!! I really feel suffocated from this situation, and need your support to start over in a new place I appeal to the whole world to hear my and my family's mournful cry in Gaza. We need the helping hand that reaches out to wipe our tears and build a bridge to safety

We are really tired. I am making a great effort to convey my voice to you, and your donation is not a simple thing, it is a chance of new survival for my family Amplify me by reblogging and donate if you can, please 🙏🏻

• Our campaign is vetted by 🇵🇸 @/gazavetters List at #291 • DONATE HERE / VETTED HERE

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HUMANITARIAN RESOURCES, LINKS & MORE

i just wanted to compile a list of resources and links to pages, organisations, etc. that i've come across and wanted to combine. there is no pressure for donations but i strongly encourage people to stay up to date on news and stay educated ! i wanted to also include some links that are free in case you are not in a position to donate, but please continue to spread word, sharing and reblogging etc as little can go a long way !!

Daily clicks to help ( free ) + includes refugees, palestine, environment etc.

Palestine Links | tumblr post

More ways to help !!!

some families to donate to:

Help Hani and His Family Safely Evacuate Gaza

Help Aya's Family

Help Fatma build a safe home

Help Shada's Family escape

Emergency Evacuation for Areej's Family in Gaza

Help Hamdi build a new life

some organistions to donate to:

Gaza Donations | MATW Project

Demand a Ceasefire | Amnesty International ( free to sign! )

Humanitarian Resources Page | USA specific

Donation sites for Sudan, Congo & Palestine | Australia, Canda, United Kingdom

Feminine Hygiene Kits for Gaza | Pious Project

Palestine Children's Relief Fund

Emergency Relief for Gaza | Pious Project

for the last of us fans: boycott tlou, tlou 2, tv adaptation & political and zionist undertones of tlou

will be edited and added to, i do want to add links for congo and sudan in the future too, please stay educated and up to date, and it's never too late to show support!!

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Everyone asks the same question:

What happened?

YOU: What always happens. What was always going to happen.

@unspinning presents mirai, featuring revenge, self identity, and greed. do not trust anyone. everyone is an unreliable narrator.

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Timefighter

characters akiyama seira warnings 3.5k words, brief mentions of suicide and drugs, seira is an unreliable narrator, probably medical inaccuracies but not really doesn't even go into detail, hina haunts the narrative, i keep switching back and forth between past and present tense, i have also over thought this chapter too many times and have finished it without giving it another read before posting

In her dream, Seira can’t breathe.

      There’s a heavy weight on her chest, feeling like it’s being caved in as her breathing grows more ragged. Through the spots blurring her vision, she makes out a dark figure looming above her. She goes to look up at their face, but all she sees is a never-ending darkness.

      Her eyes flicker open. Orange flames greet her.

      Seira jumps on top of her bed, alarms ringing through her head as she stares dumbly at the fire surrounding her. The heat tickles her skin, and she finds herself backing away to her wall to get away from it.

      She doesn’t mean to, but she breathes in and inhales smoke. Harsh coughs leave her mouth as she braces a hand on the ceiling and looks around. How did this happen? Where was— Minji. Did Minji ever come home from her solo schedule? She knew Jiwoo was supposed to be sleeping over at her boyfriend’s apartment.

      A lump forms in her throat, glancing from the window and her door. Her door was shut, and the fire was blocking it. There was no way she’d be able to get through it without being severely burned, if not dead. The window, however … she could jump down to her neighbor’s balcony and bang on the doors for help.

      She didn’t hesitate before heading to the window, going to unlock the locks and pausing when she realized they were already unlocked. When she hears a loud roar of the fire and feels the heat licking her back, she pushes it out of her mind and pulls up the window.

      Seira sticks her head out the window first to get away from the smoke, finally being able to see the flashing red and blue lights and a huge red fire truck. Without hesitation, she starts yelling out and waving one of her arms outside the window to capture someone’s attention. Once they finally spot her, she allows her arms a break and hunches over the railing, looking at how far she has to go to get to the ground.

      She can hear yelling over the roar of the fire, but she can hardly understand what they’re saying as the heat licks her back. She pushes herself closer to the railing, turning her head slightly to see the fire growing in her room, now surpassing the mountain of plushies she had in the corner of her room. She whimpers at the thought of losing all of her belongings before she forces herself over the railing and sits on it, arms shaking in anticipation.

      When she looks back down, she can see the ladder being propped up against the side of the building, two firefighters already half-way on top. She wonders what would happen if the fire got to her first or if she decided to not wait for them and just jump. Well, obviously, death, but what else? Would everything just end and fade to black? Did she want that more than surviving? Was Hina thinking the same thing right on the cusp of death?

      Seira has already made her mind up by the time the firefighter reaches her, leaning forward to leap over the gap between the balconies to reach them. As she’s led to the ground, all she could do was keep glancing back to her window that was now fully engulfed in flames.

      Warmth envelopes her into a hug, catching a glimpse of an orange blanket wrapped around her shoulders as the firefighters direct her to one of the ambulances. She can see where her neighbors are all crowded around, obviously evacuating once the fire alarm went off. As it clicks in her head, she looks around the parking lot through a sea of red and blue for either of her members. Before she can look any further, hands are guiding her to sit down on the edge before a bright light is abruptly shined in her eyes. She exhales, eyes trailing past the light and to the burner building.

      The fire must have started in their dorm. Did she accidentally leave the stove on before she fell asleep? She couldn’t remember much besides feeling too tired from dance practice and passing out without so much as removing her makeup and doing her skincare routine.

      “Miss?” She manages to catch, eyes zoning back in to look at the paramedic in front of her. “She must be in shock,” he tells the other one beside him, checking her blood pressure.

      Probably. “I’m just thinking,” she mutters, not really wanting to raise her voice any louder. “Where are my roommates?” She then gasps, speaking louder this time with wide eyes, “We have two cats—”

      The paramedics exchange a glance uneasily at her words and Seira whimpers in a mixture of disbelief and grief, pressing a palm to her head, “How did this happen— why, why—” Her head is trying to wrap around the situation, not understanding how this happened. She feels like crying but it feels like the fire burned them all out of her. She feels dry. Were they expecting her to cry? If she doesn’t cry, will they think she did this on purpose? Ugh—

      “Calm down,” the man in front of her rushes to say, “We haven’t heard anything. Your blood pressure is 176/90, a bit high but expected. Do you feel dizzy?” She shakes her head, still holding her hand to forehead. “Good, stay sitting just in case. Let me go ask the firefighters if they’ve rescued anyone else while my partner stays here with you.”

      Seira looks up in slight surprise and watches as he walks away before her eyes move to the side where the other much younger paramedic now stands before her. He seems startled at her sudden attention before standing up straight, clearing his throat, “Uh, did you get hurt anywhere?”

      She stares at him, wondering how she was just in her bed an hour ago, asleep, and now she was here, sitting in front of this paramedic who asks her stupid questions like if she’s hurt when Kori and Kio were hurt or burned to ashes. She shudders at the image crossing her mind, immediately trying to think of something else. Maybe it’d do her some good to answer his questions.

      “No,” she glances down at herself as if she could see through the blanket wrapped around her. “I don’t feel any—” A series of coughs interrupts her sentence and she immediately turns her head to the side, facing away from him. She leans over slightly, bringing a hand to her chest as the paramedic’s hand rests his hand on her back and a water bottle is shoved into her line of sight. She grabs it, taking a sip to placate him only to almost choke it right back up and he cautiously pats her on the back. “Um.”

      “Maybe it’s best if you get checked out further at the hospital,” he looks around for his partner, “Let me— Oh! Mina! Mina here will stay with you while I go find— yeah, bye.” He practically passes her off to the female paramedic, an irritated expression falling on her face as the lady watches him run away.

      The lady, Mina, sighs, looking back over to Seira who clears her hoarse throat, feeling awkward after seeing the way the paramedic wanted to get away so bad, “You don’t have to watch me, I’m not a child and I’m not going to just drop dead. I’m fine, hardly a scratch on me,” she raises her arms up as if showcasing herself.

      “You’ll still probably have to get checked out, probably by your company’s orders,” Mina says and Seira blinks. Mina laughs, “I know who you are, my sister is a big fan. Your face is everywhere in her room.”

      “Oh,” Seira feels like she’s watching herself through a screen, forcing a smile that didn’t look forced as she now knew the paramedic recognized her. “Thank you, what’s her name?”

      “Sohyun,” Mina smiles, not noticing her unease. “She’s nineteen, you two are close in age, right?” Her gaze turns away from Seira, “Hey, those are your members, right?”

      Seira whirls around, looking behind her to see Minji and Jiwoo standing around, a startled look on Jiwoo’s face. She must’ve just came back from her boyfriend’s apartment, her dress still on while Minji wore her usual attire of baggy pants and a crop top. She feels her shoulders drop in relief when she spots the two white cats in Minji’s arms, perfectly unharmed but very startled from the amount of people around them.

      She begins to walk at a fast pace towards them, eyes wide, “Are you guys OK?” She looks down at the two cats who start to meow once they see her, and Minji eagerly holds her arms out for her to grab them. She holds them both in her arms, pressing kisses over their heads and sighing in relief. “God, I had no idea where any of you were.”

      “We’re fine,” Minji says, looking around, “They must’ve managed to get out somehow because I found them by a bush.”

      Seira has no idea how that happened, but she’s grateful either way. She presses another kiss to both of their heads, “I had to climb out the window, but I’m OK, too,” she presses her lips together, not bothering to glance up at either of the two girls. They don’t say anything and she inhales, turning around to walk back to the ambulance. Mina is still standing there, and she wonders if she was waiting for her to come back.

      “So glad those two made it out,” Mina nods her head at the cats, but keeps a careful distance away, “Sorry, I’m allergic to them. Sohyun loves them, though.”

      Seira wonders why she keeps bringing her sister up so much, but then she considers that if it were Ryuhei’s idol, she’d do the same. “I assume you don’t have any,” she replies, glancing down at the cats in her arms and then around her. She can see a few familiar faces in the crowd around her, but she can tell they’re too preoccupied by learning what happened and if everyone was OK to know she was right there in front of them. “Do you have your phone? I can make a video saying hello to your sister if you want,” she smiles, not knowing why she feels obligated to despite knowing she didn’t have to. She just didn’t want her to go home and tell her sister that she met her idol and then not have any proof– plus, it’d look bad if she didn’t at least say hi or sign something, right?

      “Oh, you don’t have to!” Mina says, and then quickly adds like Seira was about to retract her offer, pulling her phone out of her back pocket. “But that’s super sweet of you, thank you.” She eagerly pulls up the camera app, “I’ll record because you’re holding the cats. And… Recording.”

      “Hi, Sohyunie,” Seira coos, smiling into the camera as she waves Kio’s paw, “I just met your super nice sister and she couldn’t stop talking about you. I hear you’re my fan, and you like cats, so I wanted you to meet Kori and Kio properly. Thank you for supporting Mirai–” Because she always has to say Mirai, not me. This was not a solo thing, this was a team thing. “And for loving me!” She did it, anyway. “Bye,” she waves Kori’s paw this time.

      “That’s so sweet, thank you!” Mina smiles widely, “You know–” She stops herself, spotting something behind Seira, “Oh, I think they’re wanting to take you to the hospital now.”

      Seira’s front slightly drops, glancing behind her to see the paramedics from before and one of Mirai’s managers, Gyuri, approaching them. “Really, I don’t think that’s necessary, I am completely fine. And I can’t leave the cats! They have nowhere to go, now,” she frowns at Gyuri once she’s within earshot.

      “You just got rescued from a fire, you’re going,” Gyuri says with a tone that suggests Seira should shut up while she’s ahead.

      Seira, for once, decides to listen and at least not argue with her. “OK, but where are you going to take them?”

      “I’ll take them home with me until we get you guys situated somewhere else,” Gyuri sighs, bringing a hand to her forehead in frustration. “For now, do as the doctor and nurses say.”

“What did the doctors say?” Kaede asks over the phone later that morning. It was now three in the morning, and Seira had just gotten to her sister’s apartment in Seoul after leaving the hospital. After being around so many people today when she didn’t have to, and being in the place she hates the most for the better of the night, she just wanted to be alone. By then, her sister had woken up in America where she was on tour and told her to just go to her apartment with the cats. Her mother, who learned about the fire through the media, freaked out and spam called her while she was talking to the doctor. Ryuhei had texted her a simple ‘u ok’ and she replied with a thumbs up. She loves their relationship. She was almost waiting on a text from her twin.

      Seira’s chest hurt. She doesn’t know if it’s from thinking of Hina or from the smoke. “Um…” She mutters, turning to look at her reflection in the mirror only to realize what she had unconsciously done the moment she arrived. Every mirror in the apartment was covered with a blanket or towel. It was better that way. “Get plenty of rest and sleep. So what I already knew.”

      “Oh.”

      For a moment, it seems like Kaede is about to ask what symptoms she has, worry more. But she doesn’t and says, “I have to get ready, we landed in LA late last night for the concert. Love you, bye!” She makes an obnoxious kissing noise before ending the call.

      Seira rolls her eyes, she hates when people hang up on her. So rude. She switches off the bathroom light and walks into the hallway to her bedroom, usually here more than Kaede is. It has less stuff than her room in the dorm did, but she also has her more valuable things here. Kaede’s apartment complex was heavily guarded, no one could get in or out without the key. Most of the people residing in the building were elderly people or other celebrities.

      Still, she triple checks all three locks on the front door, as well as the windows. When she does the windows, she looks outside. She can see the frozen pool from her window, snow decorating the ground and trees, and every street lamp works perfectly well. No one is outside. She envies them for having a proper sleep schedule. Earlier today had been one of the few days she was able to sleep early.

      Her phone lights up from a notification, her head turning slightly to read what it says. The message is from Jiwoo, and she’s wondering if she’s home already. She stares down at her screen until it darkens and she turns her head back to the window. Her phone rings this time and she sighs, fully turning her body away from her phone. She lets it go to voicemail.

      Her phone chimes again. She huffs, turning to pick up her phone and finally respond to Jiwoo. However, there’s only one text from Jiwoo from three minutes ago and a phone call from an unknown blocked number from a minute ago and a text from the same number a couple of seconds ago. Before she can fully read the message, another text pops up from the number.

It’s Siwon.

      A short exhale of excitement makes her sit up straight, heart pounding in her chest as she calls him back. She clears her throat right before the call is answered.

      “Did you find anything?” Seira asks, heart caught in her throat. Every time Siwon calls, she gets this feeling of hope in her chest, and every time he calls, she’s let down. She tries to not do that anymore, but it’s hard.

      “Have you heard of the website Loom?” Siwon’s voice is raspy as always, presumably from his smoking habit. She can hear him inhale from over the phone and rolls her eyes, but understands. She could go for a cigarette right now if she wasn’t so worried about her vocal chords. If she didn’t have to, she’d probably smoke like Siwon did.

      “No,” she frowns, wondering where he was going with this. “What is it?”

      “At first glance, it seems like a simple messaging site, also an app, by the way,” he coughs for a few seconds more than normal, clearing his throat after, “Sorry. Anyways, I’m sure the owner of the website didn’t mean for it to be anymore than that, but the problem is the users of Loom. It seems to be where sasaengs go to share their pictures and videos freely.” When she doesn’t say anything, merely putting him on speaker and searching up the website herself on a private browser, he continues, “Everything went as schedule for Hina until she started going to Itaewon every week.”

      Seira’s brows furrow, “Itaewon? What was she doing there? Was anyone with her?” Besides the sasaengs, she adds to herself.

      “She’d go to the same complex building and stay there for a couple of hours until leaving late in the middle of the night or early morning.” Siwon lists off. “They don’t know what she was doing inside but… Well, I'll send you the texts. It's not a good place, Seira. There are bad people there, rapists, murderers, but there are also drug dealers so that's a little less terrifying but not comforting.”

      The world seems to come to a still around her as she reads the screenshots he sent her, no longer hearing Siwon in case he was still speaking. What the hell had Hina been doing around a bunch of criminals? She knew she wouldn't touch a murderer or rapist, probably preferring to kill them instead. She didn’t think she was that stupid to get involved with drugs, especially with her being an idol and how it would affect the rest of her own group and her sisters. Maybe she had been meeting someone? But she wouldn’t have gotten involved with an addict, either. She knows she was trying to find an excuse to defend why hes was there, but it was better than believing the alternative. But maybe it was the only option there was.

      “So she really overdosed and killed herself?” Seira cuts him off in the middle of whatever he was saying, her voice quiet.

      Siwon doesn’t speak for a long moment. “It seems like it, kid. I’m sorry. I know this wasn’t what you were wanting to hear, but at least now maybe you’ll have some closure.”

      Closure.

      She didn’t want closure, she wanted to find out the truth. Closure meant leaving her sister behind. She had already done it once with their father almost four years ago, but she still had her sister then. They were each other’s other half— they had known each other before Seira was herself. And now she doesn’t know what to do without her. It’s like she’s just going through the motions of her day without actually feeling anything, or caring enough to acknowledge it. Sometimes it was better that way.

      Everyone had essentially called her crazy for thinking her sister didn’t kill himself, no matter how many times she insisted that she knew her twin. They chalked it up to grief, not suggesting but demanding that she sees a therapist. Minji and Jiwoo had told their managers, who in turn told Woohyuk, Delphi Entertainment’s CEO. Woohyuk brought her in for a meeting with Gyuri and told her to get her shit together before they were forced to go to extreme measures. She doesn’t see how she was that bad, but whatever. It’s not like she was going out on live telling fans.

      It’s only when her phone falls on her face that she realizes how badly her hands are shaking, and she can now hear Siwon still talking. Talking about what, she has no idea– but it’s not helping.

      “Thanks, Siwon,” she cuts him off, voice quiet. He goes silent. “I’ll send the money in a minute. Bye.” She hangs up without another word, not even thinking that it was hypocritical of her. She turns her phone completely off, placing it in the drawer besides her and lays back down. She tries to grasp her remaining control over her emotions, but the sudden news paired with the intense fear she felt tonight was too much.

      Seira waits for the tears to inevitably come. For the first time in a while, she understands her sister again. If taking drugs was such a relief for everyone like they said, if it had gotten rid of what she felt right now– she would take it within a heartbeat.

[midmourn]

TO HELP SAVE THE LIVES OF PEOPLE OF GAZA check out these links!

daily click : with just a click a day you will be helping them with the donations! IF YOU HAVEN'T CLICKED IT YET DO IT NOW! RIGHT NOW!!!

gazafunds.com : on this site you will find can directly help the families by donating to their 'gofumdme' campaigns to help them reach their goal! (p.s. on mobile, each time you refresh the page you'll find a new campaign)

@/gazavetters : on this tumblr page you'll find verified fundraising campaigns that you can trust to donate to!

careforgaza : is a non-profit charity in aid of helping the needy families of palestine. on this twt page you will find various ways to help the people!

PCRF.net : primary humanitarian organization in palestine, delivering crucial and life-saving medical relief and humanitarian aid where it is needed most! donate to help the children of gaza with basic necessary resources!

unicef : this is unicef's donation campaign for the children of gaza to help provide them life saving necessities!

un crisis relief : to help the people in gaza and west bank!

unrwa.org : here you will find various causes to donate to!

unfpa.org : to support the women and girls of gaza with ife-saving medicines and essential hygiene supplies!

MSF, doctors without borders : they provide immediate and impartial medical care to individuals confronted by the crisis, donate to help them with their mission!

oxfam international : operating on the ground in gaza, oxfam provides essential humanitarian aid, including clean water, food, and hygiene items to address immediate crisis impacts!

ANERA : provides food, water, medicine, and hygiene kits to those in gaza affected by the war!

world vision : is providing emergency relief; in-kind food assistance for displaced families; helping vulnerable communities protect children and young people and respond to violence and emergencies and so much more!

WILL KEEP ADDING MORE AS I FIND!

hlp.GAZA! : under this tag on my page you will find posts of fundraising campaigns you can donate to and other gaza related posts!

[midmourn]

Help Majed save his family!!

Majed is only 19 years old and yet he and his family are fighting to live each day, he is a friend of Ahmed ((@/ahmadresh2)) who has a verified campaign.

verification information here

Do not hesitate to help with any amount of money you can, and if you have no money to give, share this post! Keep everybody in your thoughts! Do not forget about anybody!

Here is my taglist to get this circulated. If you would like to be removed, please message me!

@loveaankilaq @2spirit-0spoons @gaylienz @and-all-the-gayer-for-it @garnetgh0st @oorevitcejda

[midmourn]

🚨 We Need Your Kindness to Survive 🚨

Hello, My name is Mosab Elderawi, and I live in Gaza with my family. Life here has become harder than I ever imagined, and I’m writing this with hope in my heart that you might hear our story.

The ongoing war has devastated my family. We’ve lost 25 family members—each one a beloved part of our lives, taken too soon. I miss them deeply—their laughter, their presence, their love. Every day is a reminder of this unimaginable loss.

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We are now facing daily challenges to survive—things that most people take for granted, like food, clean water, and a safe place to sleep. The harsh realities of life here have replaced our dreams with the constant fight for survival.

Our Current Situation:

💔 Lost Stability: The war has left us without work or a stable source of income. 🍞 Basic Needs: Food and water are becoming harder to afford with rising prices and scarce resources. 📚 Dreams on Hold: Like so many here, my family’s dreams have been replaced by the need to simply survive. 😢 Unimaginable Loss: Losing 25 loved ones has left a void that can never be filled.

How You Can Help:

I’m sharing our story with the hope that someone out there might care. Even $5 can make a big difference for us, and if you’re unable to donate, just reblogging this post can help spread the word.

Your kindness, no matter how small, is something we’ll never forget.

What This Means to Us:

Your support is not about changing our entire situation—it’s about giving us a little relief, a little hope, and a way to keep going. We are not asking for much, and we understand if you can’t donate. Sharing our story is just as valuable to us as a donation.

Thank you for reading this far. It means the world to us to know that someone is listening. Your kindness gives us strength and helps us believe in a better tomorrow.

With all our gratitude, Mosab Elderawi and Family ❤️

✅️ Vetted by ✅️

@gazavetters, my number verified on the list is ( #309 )✅️

@fancysmudges @brokenbackmountain @just-browsing1222-deactivated20 @mothblossoms @aleciosun @fluoresensitive @khizuo @lesbiandardevil @transmutationisms @schoolhater @timogsilangan @appsa @buttercuparry @sayruq @malcriada @palestinegenocide @sar-soor @akajustmerry @annoyingloudmicrowavecultist @feluka @tortiefrancis @flower-tea-fairies @tsaricides @riding-with-the-wild-hunt @visenyasdragon @belleandsaintsebastian @ear-motif @kordeliiius @brutaliakhoa @raelyn-dreams @troythecatfish @theropoda @tamarrud @4ft10tvlandfangirl @queerstudiesnatural @northgazaupdates2 @skatezophrenic @awetistic-things @camgirlpanopticon @baby-girl-aaron-dessner @nabulsi @sygol @junglejim4322 @heritageposts @chososhairbuns @palistani @dlxxv-vetted-donations @illuminated-runas @imjustheretotrytohelp

[midmourn]

Requests Received - 11/5

@najahmeq2 - GFM (€5,046), Vetted

@salman1990a - GFM was deleted, will update once new campaign is launched, Vetted

@mohammedatallah - GFM (€22,325/€82K), Donation Protected

@ahmed-fathi-gaza - GFM (€21,131/€80K), Vetted

@nooranqar1 - GFM (€24,055/€40K goal), Vetted

@helpamalsfamily - GFM (€2,405/€53K), Vetted

@tareqayyad004 - GFM ($11,506/$92.9K), Vetted

@wadyahmoh - GFM ($13,172/$35K), Donation Protected

@esraayyad14 - GFM (€27,868/€45K), Vetted

@hanan-famliiy - GFM ($4,233/$20K), Vetted

@ahmad-syam2 - GFM ($7,399 CAD/$40K), Vetted

@akramaldwaik - GFM ($1,268/$25K), Vetted

@alaaread - GFM (£230/£30K), Donation Protected

@ahmadahmadallouh32 - GFM (€8,324/€50K), Vetted

@yasmeenmahmoudgaza - GFM (€300/€15K), Previous campaign Vetted

@mmalakhasan - GFM (€2,265/€25K), Vetted

@eslamfamily11 - GFM ($25,515/$50K), Vetted

@mahmodsyj - GFM ($8,290/$25K), Vetted

[midmourn]

Help a Displaced Amal's Family from Gaza Rebuild Their Lives 💔🇵🇸

Dear Humanity,

My name is Amal, and I am from Gaza. We are 5 family members. Currently, my family and I are living in northern Gaza under conditions of starvation, shelling, and gunfire. Gaza is experiencing a devastating war that has forced many families, including mine, to flee our homes repeatedly. Each time we are displaced, we are unable to take anything with us, losing the little food and clothing we managed to store.

We are enduring an unimaginable crisis right now, facing severe shortages of food and water tainted with harmful viruses and bacteria. This contamination is causing dangerous skin and respiratory diseases, and we are now also grappling with an outbreak of polio.

The scarcity of food is not just a hardship; it is a relentless torment, leaving us weakened and ill. Our lack of income, or rather its complete absence, is tearing our family apart, leaving us helpless and struggling to survive.

This suffering is beyond what any living being should endure. Imagine spending just one night in these conditions how would you feel? From the depths of our hearts, we desperately implore you to support us, to help us escape this famine and the devastation of war.

Our home, my workplace, and all my sources of income as a software developer have been destroyed due to the war. With no stable place to stay and no source of income, we are struggling to survive.

We urgently need your help to:

Purchase essential food and clothing for my family, Secure a temporary shelter, and Leaving Gaza and seeking a safe place to start a new life for me and my family.

Therefore, I implore you to help us provide food, water, and a safe place outside of Gaza for me and my family. Your donations will make a significant difference in our lives. Every contribution, no matter how small, will provide us with the relief we desperately need and the hope to rebuild our future.

Thank you for your kindness and generosity.

Your support will give us a chance to overcome this crisis and look forward to a better tomorrow.

Dear Tumblr Community,

I am delighted to be part of this comunity and seek your support in sharing a post I've crafted. This isn't merely a collection of words but a crucial part of a fundraising effort to assist my family during these challenging times.

I have faith that you will help amplify this message to reach a wide audience.

Thank you sincerely for your support..❤️🇵🇸

Verified by : @hayanahed

[midmourn]

My name is mahmoud mohammed jaafar jaafar i studied computer engineering and graduated from university in 2023 i worked as a software engineer in a local company here in gaza unit the war started, then the company got destroyed and became unemployed and our house is destroyed partially and became inhabitant to live in but nevertheless we stayed in it because we do not else to go i currently live in north gaza where is a scarcity of food and i have 3 brothers and 4 sister one of them died while he was trying to find food for the family so i am the eldest in my family now i have to provide a living for them

Any amount you give me will help me a lot in supporting my family in Gaza in light of the fear and lack of food, medicine and drink

Any amount you give me will help me a lot, even if it is $10.

[midmourn]

Emergency: Help Abedallah and his family to Evacuate From GAZA WAR

✅️Vetted by @gazavetters, my number verified on the list is ( #276 )✅️

https://gofund.me/c358a1a5

Dear Humanity,

Please read this as if I'm a member of your family. maybe your brother, son or a friend and as if my family who's under death now is yours.

My name is Abedallah, a fresh graduate who wants to be a doctor like his role model, his father.

A student who was supposed to start his university and achieve the dreams he worked for but found himself losing the city he's living in, his house and losing any hope of a better future with it.

And after a alot of studying in Tawjihi ( The final level at high school before joining university), the war had another plan.

The story started since childhood, when every one I have knowen called me doctor.

This continued till I reach to the final grade at my school grade 12 (Tawjihi).

In this time, I felt that everything should be real, I can do it, I started to study

and work hard from begining to end, no sleep, no rest, all these things to achieve my goal and make my dream a real one.

The hard year has finished, then two week of fear waiting.

After this, the result came, it’s 99.4, I ranked the third in my country.

Since the war on Gaza strip started, we struggled alot, when we were at home at the beginning of the war the Israeli occupation bombed many houses around us, then we were displaced to Rafah because of fear and at the first day suddenly we heard the sound of many blasts,cracking glass and screaming women and children, they blew up a residential square near us.

After two months, I returned to khanyonis, but not to our home.

I live in tent becuse the israeli occupation burned my house completely, nothing left.

I feel that I lost and continue to lose every thing, this war made my dreams, hopes, my beloved things and my beautiful house burned and disappeared.

The single wish for me at this time is waking up from this nightmare and everything goes back to what it was.

Help your brother to get out of this disaster, rebuild his house and complete his education and realise his dream of becoming a doctor.

[midmourn]

I am Hiba Khader, a mother of three children, now living with my sons in Gaza.

You know the situation in Gaza, for more than a year we suffer every minute we live.

I had a beautiful life, but the war destroyed everything, destroyed my dreams, I lost my job, my whole house was turned into rubble and our car became a wreck.

I suffered the horrors of war every day in Gaza, we were struck by fear, terror, cold, and severe hunger, and my children were afflicted with diseases due to epidemics.

Food is very expensive, and if we find it, we do not have the money to buy it, and the same applies to medicine.

I sleep at night crying because my children go to bed hungry and I cannot feed them.

I search every day for a piece of bread for my children so that we can stay alive, and I rarely get help.

I live in a poor tent made of cloth that does not protect from the heat of the sun during the day, the cold of the night, or the rain of winter.

I move and flee from one place to another to escape danger, but danger is everywhere.

I wish this war would end while we are alive so we can live in safety and have a home where we can forget the painful suffering of war and bring a smile back to my children's faces and create for them a life they deserve. Please 🙏 help us survive so we can live a better life ❤️.

[midmourn]

A low came and destroyed our tents and our camp, and now we are without anything (no clothes, no mattresses, no blankets), I hate winter, I hate winter, I hate winter and we are in this condition😭😭😭💔

I really really need your help to buy a tarpaulin and some bedding, please donate to save me and my family we are in a difficult situation now,

I ask you to donate and share to reach the price of the tent which is $2000. Save us from the cold.

Please donate, please donate, please donate

I need your help now more than ever.😭🙏🙏⚘️

✅️Vetted by @gazavetters, my number verified on the list is ( #241 )✅️

[midmourn]

happy holidays to everyone, merry christmas if you celebrate!! :)