mister-riddler

[mister-riddler]

Well why don’t you stand up for yourself?

He pulls out a gun

I’ll cripple you too

[mister-riddler]

it’s LITERALLY not that big of a deal. Calm down

I think you forget I am a Gotham rouge. I’m above imbeciles like you. Do you need a reminder?

[mister-riddler]

it’s a public place. I have just as much right to shop as you do.

That doesn’t mean you have the right to touch my property. Get. Out

[mister-riddler]

it was like. Half an inch, Jesus, man!

I’m sure that’s what your partners say too. Get out before I make you

[mister-riddler]

Excuse me, Mr… Riddler, sir. My name is Chelsea. I’m with Gotham’s make-a-wish program. I was wondering if you were willing to help grant a wish. The little boy wants to meet you.

Huh? Why, of course! Who wouldn’t want to meet the most intelligent man in the world?

[mister-riddler]

It’s literally a chair. You were in the way.

That’s the equivalent of shoving someone out of the way. Do I need to teach you a more permanent lesson to get it in your thick skull?

[mister-riddler]

I didn’t touch you!

You touched my chair

His words were dripping with venom

[mister-riddler]

Ow! Hey! What the hell was that for?!

Do NOT touch me

[mister-riddler]

*pushes your chair so I can get past you in the grocery store*

Hey! Fuck off!

He whacks you with his cane

[mister-riddler]

I’m getting cabin fever

[mister-riddler]

Reblog if you're okay with people coming into your dms or ask box with storylines and rp ideas!

[mister-riddler]

I don’t care WHAT people say. Robin is a title for people with barely concealed anger issues, and I keep unfortunately getting on the receiving end

Konnor: Tim has to be the chillest Robin. He's snarky, but I bet that guy doesn't give Batman headaches.

Bart (wearing a beanie that's covering his eyes): Probably.

Meanwhile, in Gotham…

Red Robin had been punching the Riddler for ten minutes and had been beating him up for about twenty. Batman stood to the side, contemplating pulling Red Robin away, but the last time he did that too early, he was greeted with an elbow to the mouth.

Batman (attempting to reason with his son): I think he's had enough.

Red Robin (pausing mid-punch): Nah, he wanted to say something about my mother. I'll give him something to laugh at.

Red Robin resumed wailing on the bleeding, trembling man.

Batman: I can understand the reaction, I'd be pissed if he insulted my mother especially with what he called yours, but-

Red Robin (seething with rage, slapping Riddler): Shut the hell up, or I’m shoving my fist down your throat! Have to deal with Firefly, I'm having insane people thoughts and he insulted my dead mom!

Riddler (weakly): I'm… sorry.

Red Robin (with a twisted smile, beginning to choke Riddler): Say it five more times, and I might stop. Beg! Beg!

Batman checked the time on his phone.

Batman: Alright, let me try this nerve pinch Ra's taught me.

Batman calmly walked behind his son and pinched a nerve on the man's neck, causing his eyes to cross and his tongue to stick out.

Red Robin (falling to the side): Sleepy time.

Batman picked up his son.

Batman: That's right. Let's take you to the car to nap. Edward, stay there.

Riddler (slurred words): I'm not… shure it's shafe for me to shtand up… Reshting here until I'm at Arkham is the shafest choice.

[mister-riddler]

RP BLOGS!!!

Reblog this post if you allow magic anons

Magic Anons, or M! As, are users who send annonymous questions to ask blog that have some kind of magical effect on the blog for a certain duration of time.

[mister-riddler]

Nobody understands how frustrating it is to be this smart. Yes, it’s a good problem to have, I suppose, but all of these imbeciles-! They don’t listen, and whenever I talk about my accomplishments, they just think I’m bragging! Am I not allowed to be proud of myself? People will automatically assume you think you’re better than them just because you learn faster, but that’s usually not the case! I, of course am better than them, but that’s beside the point. Why am I like this, I certainly don’t come from a family of gifted people, so why me? Why do I have to be the better person, the higher intelligence!?

[mister-riddler]

Interesting…

Why is everything always so easy for me? I need a challenge, something to really get my brain working, I need something, anything to pick at for more than a couple seconds! I just wish- I wish something actually challenged me

[mister-riddler]

I still don’t understand how autism can make someone learn things faster

Why is everything always so easy for me? I need a challenge, something to really get my brain working, I need something, anything to pick at for more than a couple seconds! I just wish- I wish something actually challenged me

[mister-riddler]

I thought it just made you socially awkward and made it difficult to understand things

Why is everything always so easy for me? I need a challenge, something to really get my brain working, I need something, anything to pick at for more than a couple seconds! I just wish- I wish something actually challenged me