mortimerlatrice - Tumblr blog

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[mortimerlatrice]

Shirley Jackson, We Have Always Lived in the Castle Vincent van Gogh, Garden at Arles (1888)

[mortimerlatrice]

some people on tumblr are really like "of course i love female characters! which is why i ship this girlboss and malewife. men get pegged by powerful woman! i'm calling this m/f ship yuri. this canonically male character is a woman to me but not in a transfem way and i'm not exploring it further. yeah i love lesbians uhhh i'll headcanon background character #9 as a lesbian because she doesn't get in the way of my ship. lol ew why do you ship blorba and blorbette together when blorbette is canonically married to a man? no i don't actually have a favorite female character because all fictional women are poorly written!"

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remember when u were like 11 and the only thing u wanted was a lava lamp

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No time to explain, just get in

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Some gay men have also described being praised by people who know that they are gay fathers, as they react with astonishment over their capacity to take well care of a child without a woman in the household. Likewise, the participants in the present study described how they were recurrently praised, simply for taking care of their children. Such praise was given in situations where they had been read as fathers, i.e., presumably passing as cisgender men. One participant described a huge difference in how he was treated by people who presumed him to be a cisgender man, compared to when he was known to be a transgender man. As soon as people knew that he was transgender, and that he was the gestational parent, he was expected to be the main caregiver, and no one would praise him for his daily duties. Thus, caretaking engagements, which is often taken for granted when performed by women, seem to be similarly expected to be performed by transgender men who are gestational parents. The gender assigned at birth and/or the role as the gestational parent seem to trump the present gender identity when it comes to others’ expectations of a person’s parenting role.

from the study Transgender Men Forming Two-Father Families with Their Cisgender Male Partners: Negotiating Gendered Expectations and Self-Perceptions by Anna Malmquist

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My butch and I are both lesbians. We are, neither of us, men.

But I call him my boyfriend. I call him my boytoy, my boy, sir, Mr., guy. Cause this language makes him happy. It supports his gender and expression, and it makes him happy.

Butches of all flavors and types have been using he/him pronouns and masculine language forever. Butches have been called boy, guy, boyfriend. Butches have used "traditionally masculine" names like Mitch, Ed, Mac, Joe.

Cause guess what?

Language is fake! It's all made up! If it makes you happy, use it! Wanna call yourself "boy," even if you're not a man? Do it! Wanna be called "boyfriend," even if you're not a guy? Go for it!

[mortimerlatrice]

apo | twitter

Miss You All~ ☺️ If you were a cat, I would hold you like this ☺️😆😘🥰

[mortimerlatrice]

Briana Cuoco as Jenny Green Dead Boy Detectives (2024)

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gonna say it.......... i need them to see me from across the bar and really dig my vibe 👁️👁️

(from silvypavida on ig)

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Quaye Dennis and Mensah Benjamin by Vinyet Feliubadalo for Lofficiel Hommes Brasil Magazine December 2023

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Porsche dragged Kinn out to Ayutthaya to enjoy the water fight for the first time ever. The bodyguards are panicking about it, Kinn got super competitive about it at first before Chay simply dumped a bucket over his head, and Tankhun somehow wound up on an elephant.

HAPPY SONGKRAN!!!

timelapse under the cut

[mortimerlatrice]

🚩Cult and cultlike/toxic behavior: red flags in fandom 🚩

A non-exhaustive list inspired by my 10+ years of experience in fandom, both personal and second-hand. By sharing this, I hope to make other people more aware and able to protect themselves in the future. No fandom space or friend group is worth your mental health.

They claim they have secret information and use that to lure you in

They might either lovebomb you at first or make you (feel like you have to) prove your worth

The leader(s) of the group might not feel super approachable, at least not without fear of saying the wrong thing

They seem to create or point out a divide in fandom you’d never noticed before. Likely this divide isn’t actually there in wider fandom, or the need for it is wholly unnecessary.

They create an us vs them (outsiders) situation. Their group has the most knowledge and expertise, if others critique them it’s simply cause they must’ve heard false rumors. They are always the ones who are “misunderstood”.

Questioning statements from leaders/people with high regard in the group, is not without risk. You can get dogpiled, your intelligence put into question and gaslit about your own words and feelings.

You see discussions happen and get more heated, and at the end of that discussion the person on the receiving end of the things mentioned above ^ starts apologizing profusely and/or believes they are indeed stupid. However, if this person does keep defending their stance, they might get bullied or kicked out of the server/group chat

Too much emphasis on Being Right/having the correct take or theory – it may seem it has a higher priority than empathy and tactful communication

You need to have an opinion (their opinion), because silence equals condoning or agreeing with the “other side”

Everything is a moral issue. When everything is made out to be a high-stakes issue or reflective of everyone as a person, it's easier for the leader(s) to manipulate you.

You find yourself excusing people’s behavior because you agree with their point. The way they bring their argument forward and the tone they use, become subordinate to finding out the truthTM

There is such a thing as The TruthTM in every theory, discussion or analysis

If you don't Get It, it's cause you haven't "worked on yourself enough". Or it's cause you're not trying hard enough, or you haven't done enough reading, or you have blind spots only they can see.

There is a lot of conspiratorial thinking – maybe actors are trying to send us secret messages, maybe there is a Whole Lot You Don’t Know But We Do, Trust Us, maybe this or that person in fandom has tried to attack us and are planning a bigger attack,…

You barely/don’t have fandom friends outside of this group and if you do, you tend to intentionally (whether subconsciously or not) hide your experience from them. They wouldn’t understand the way they talk, they wouldn’t understand the way it works etc

They want to know a lot of your personal information. - might only happen once you get into higher ranks

You might get (more and more) specific “tasks”, it starts becoming a part-time job instead of a hobby/fun space to hang out with friends

Of course, these red flags are not always immediately visible let alone advertised when you join a group chat/discord server/twitter or tumblr bubble. They can also be nonexistent at first and show up later. Here are some general ways to stay vigilant:

Periodically check in with your values, if they might be changing & how you feel about that.

Keep an eye on the way people (and yourself) are being treated. Is it kind? Is it fair? Do you feel on edge all the time when you’re having conversations? Is your body more tense when you’re in this online space or when certain people are around? Be honest with yourself here.

Ask yourself: Is this space becoming my only coping mechanism? Am I spending too much time here? There’s no shame in spending a lot of time on things you enjoy, but do check in with yourself sometimes whether you are actually still having fun and if you are taking things too seriously or parasocialising a lot.

There's a lot of fun to be had in fandom and a lot of good that comes out of it - don't forget that. Keep seeking that. It's why we're here!

[mortimerlatrice]

I’m paying to force seven thousand strangers to see a photo of my late husband having fun with his dog. Tumblr Blaze is totally worth it. XD

[mortimerlatrice]

Porsche dragged Kinn out to Ayutthaya to enjoy the water fight for the first time ever. The bodyguards are panicking about it, Kinn got super competitive about it at first before Chay simply dumped a bucket over his head, and Tankhun somehow wound up on an elephant.

HAPPY SONGKRAN!!!

timelapse under the cut

[mortimerlatrice]

MY STAND-IN (2024) | 1.01