mostlysadposts - Tumblr blog

[mostlysadposts]

[mostlysadposts]

[mostlysadposts]

[mostlysadposts]

[mostlysadposts]

And fuck anyone who doesn't meet your standards. You don't have to settle for anything less as you give others.

And never settle for anything less then people that actually want to see you grow. People that are there for you no matter how bad your bad days are, people who still check up on you even after you haven't texted them for days or weeks.

People that will pick up when you call, no matter what time it is.

People that will come to you, even if your a plane ticket away. Or a 2 day car ride.

- something I told reminded myself

[mostlysadposts]

“I refuse to apologize for what I’ve done to survive.”

That’s what we’re supposed to say, isn’t it? Our last stand—I refuse, and so my apologies become wordless. I apologize when I flinch away from helping hands. When I forgive thoughtlessly, reflexively.

I apologize for being. I never asked to be alive.

[mostlysadposts]

Hey, stop scrolling for a minute. How are you doing? You okay? Come and sit down with me in the kitchen for a bit. It’s a warm day, the radio is playing all the oldies, the door is open and we can hear the birds. I’ll stick the kettle on. Do you take milk? Sugar? I’m baking some bread today, do you want to help? Or you can just sit and keep me company if you like. You can tell me everything that’s been going on. Or you could info dump about your favourite thing or tv show, I’d love to hear about the things you like. Or you can just sit at the table if you want, you could paint or draw or play animal crossing whilst I go about the kitchen and we can pass the time of day in contended quietness. Because you’re safe here. You can stay as long as you like and you can always come back. Everything will be okay, darling, you’ll see.

[mostlysadposts]

Gonna start referring to all my past traumatic experiences as "lore"

[mostlysadposts]

Do it halfway. Take one piece of trash out of your room, throw one dirty shirt into your hamper. Go to one class and miss a different one. Start a drawing without pressure to finish it. Give yourself space to Be without the expectation to Become, and do small things to make the Being livable.

[mostlysadposts]

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I can relate to this

[mostlysadposts]

It’s easy to feel invisible, but if you disappeared so many people would notice and care. The neighbors who always see you walk by, the shop owner or the cashier at your grocery store, the dog next door that likes to bark at you, the person at work or school who’s still working up the courage to talk to you, the friends you think forgot about you when you lost track of each other, the babysitter you had when you were four. You have touched a million lives in perfect little ways. Do not underestimate your importance in this world, you deserve to be here and you are wanted here.

[mostlysadposts]

[mostlysadposts]

Stinky Bear motivation. Extra rolls for Initiative

[mostlysadposts]

Never. Lose. Hope. <3

[mostlysadposts]

[mostlysadposts]

Self harm doesn’t always happen when a blade touches skin.

It’s skipping meals because you don’t feel like you deserve to eat today. It’s drinking recklessly because you might have the ‘courage’ do something stupid. It’s smoking - not because you need the nicotine - because you know it’s bad for you. It’s banging your head against a wall when you’re angry. It’s crossing the road without looking because you lowkey hope a car might hit you. It’s thinking about all the ways you could break a bone and make it look like an accident. It’s not taking painkillers because you want to suffer. It’s taking painkillers in excess because you know it’s dangerous. It’s walking home the more dangerous way because you’re kind of half hoping you’ll get attacked or raped or stabbed. It’s going for long walks at night and getting chilled to the bone and hoping that you get lost so that you can’t find your way back. It’s seeking out triggering material. It’s all the stupid little ways you punish yourself for existing.

Sometimes self harm happens when you put effort into depriving yourself of things you like or need, and sometimes it happens when you don’t put any effort into doing the things you like or need.

It’s a pattern of self-destructive behaviour, and it doesn’t only happen in one way.

This sort of behavior is classified as “para-suicidal” It’s putting yourself in a situation of danger or destruction with the intention of risking your safety rather than a direct attempt on your life. Kind of, leaving it all to chance? Also doing things to harm yourself or your self worth because you feel you deserve to feel the outcome of those actions.