mourninglark

[mourninglark]

every once in a while when i'm working on a fic, i get sucked down a research rabbit hole and emerge hours later without having made much progress. in an attempt to save others from this fate, i've begun putting together a spreadsheet of stranger things canon notes/references.

it includes everything from a list of every character mentioned on the show to locations in hawkins, a timeline of events, brands each character uses/eats, and other facts such as movies mentioned, birthdays, and more. no more wondering what eddie smokes! (he smokes camels, for the record.)

i figured i'd share just in case! go forth and prosper or whatever it is we're doing today. i'll continue updating as new information comes to light/i get the energy.

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DO NOT DO THIS!!!

If a website has a paywall, like New York Times, DO NOT use the ctrl+A shortcut then the ctrl+c shortcut as fast as you can because then you may accidentally copy the entire article before the paywall comes up. And definitely don't do ctrl+v into the next google doc or whatever you open because then you will accidentally paste the entire article into a google doc or something!!!! I repeat DO NOT do this because it is piracy which is absolutely totally wrong!!!

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✨ An experiment with lighting (and a limited color palette)

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nancy wheeler the eldest daughter

Thinking of Nancy always worried over her siblings. Guilty in her choices because she should’ve done more, and angry. Angry that she sees Mike and Holly but can’t see where the line is drawn between sibling and child. Hates that she is unsure whether to laugh or scold when Mike blows bubbles in his milk or sneaks food from their fathers plate. Hates that she tells them to brush their teeth before bed, get to school on time, do their homework, finish their chores and wonder if their chores were given to them by her or their mother. 

She wonders if thats why they hate her. They hate that she’s hot and cold and never lukewarm. That she teases and pulls their ears in one moment and scolds them in the next. Wonders if they hate her because she tells them how to navigate their fathers mood swings, how to please their mother, and how to live in a home where they have two parents but somehow she is both. 

-

(they don’t hate their sister, of course, they’re worried. Worried that somehow they are doing this strange thing called growing up wrong, because Nancy didn’t do this at my age, Nancy didn’t feel like she would explode at any second. 

Holly still lives in bliss of loving her sister that’s really her mother. While Mike steadily grows and grows and wonders if he wasn’t growing up wrong, but rather wonders if Nancy ever grew up. Was she ever a child, like him? Was she ever prickly in her own skin and scared of her own emotions and the heart in her chest? Or was she rather something entirely different.) 

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best thing tumblr ever did for me is the term "rotating it in my mind". it's really true that sometimes you think about something real hard but you can't tell what the thoughts are exactly. it's revolutionary stuff, i might even say

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Finished my It'll Pass series

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I feel like Wayne Munson is like the best hugger on the planet, like full enveloping, hand on the back of the head and everything

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once again thinking about how Eddie’s realization that Steve’s actually a good dude probably has to do with how Steve kept making sure he was in the loop (girl with superpowers) and placating his worries without making it seem silly (Dustin’s not cursed, just mental) and never once making Eddie feel dumb for trying to keep up and going blank under stress (not saying ‘you should already know’ when explaining the hive mind) I know we love how Eddie doesn’t make Steve feel dumb about the Ozzy reference, but Steve was also doing that for Eddie too for most of the season

Just thinking, with Eddie having failed grades and clearly struggled in school and not being seen as “traditionally” smart, he’s definitely been treated like he’s stupid before. Both him and Steve know what it’s like to feel dumb and they made such a point not to treat each other that way and it’s so!!!

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Incorrect Steddie Quotes: Part 2

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Steve and Gareth Cousins?

Here is the original post I made on Twitter!! And the sweetheart @sp0o0kylights made the most precious writing of the idea and it makes me so happy!! PART ONE PART TWO

tw/ mentioned child abuse

SO WE KNOW HOW GARETH LIVES IN LIKE THE DECENT NEIGHBORHOOD? And Eddie the only mf in a trailer?

I had a headcanon of Steve and Gareth actually being cousins?

Cause Js if you’re from a small town you most likely have family there as well.

Gareth and Steve grew up together. They were like super close until highschool hit. While gareths parents stayed loving and supportive Steve’s didn’t. They distanced themselves. Punished him for every small thing.

Gareth remembers the first time he saw his uncle hit Steve. They were playing outside and Steve fell. A deep gash on the back of his leg that was bleeding like crazy. Steve cried obviously. Shit hurt. 

Gareth remembers running to get his uncle. He remembers the man angry as he stormed outside. He remembersHis uncle hitting Steve across the face and threatening to give him a real reason to cry. 

He couldn’t do anything though. He tried. He tried so hard. Steve knew he did. They used to be so close.

Gareth was there when his uncle told Steve to not go anywhere near Gareth when they were supposed to go to highschool. He was there when his uncle raided Steve’s room and threw all his books out. His stuffed animals.

Gareth knows Steve has no idea he kept the books. Sneaking over to dig through the garbage. Pulling out Steve’s stuffed rabbit.

They both had matching ones they got years ago for Easter. Gareth didn’t know how to sew but he asked his friend Eddie. He didn’t tell him why or who it was for but Eddie could tell from his face it was something important to him. When highschool started he watched as Steve started to fade away. He spends highschool pleading silently for someone ANYONE to notice. To fucking care. The bruises were right there! Why did no one care? Why did no one help?

Gareth loved his friends, he loved them so much but why couldn’t they see that Steve was hurting. No one knew they were related. The Emerson’s were nothing like the Harringtons. His mom and his aunt looked nothing alike.

When Steve started dating Nancy, Gareth finally felt like he could breathe. Steve looked happy for the first time in years, he caught glimpses of the Steve he grew up with. 

Gareth was shocked when Eddie seemed to be upset the longer Steve and Nancy dated. 

That’s when Eddie came out to Gareth. Begging him not to tell anyone. Gareth loved his friend. God Eddie was like a brother to him but for some reason that made him mad. He demanded Eddie tell him how and why he could even possibly have a crush on Steve. He knew it probably sounded like he hated Eddie at the moment but he knew that no one in their group liked Steve.

He was shocked when Eddie looked at Gareth like he was the problem. Eddie ranting about how Steve wasn’t that bad. Mentioned how it was obvious Steve seemed like he was struggling. Eddie ranted for five minutes about it before deflating. He admits to Gareth he wishes that he could have been the one to make Steve smile. He looked so pretty when he smiled.

Gareth just sighing and rubbing Eddie’s shoulder. They both agree to keep this secret. Gareth seems to have lots of secrets lately.

Gareth continued to watch from a distance. It wasn’t until Steve’s senior year that things seemed to go backwards. After the breakup Gareth wanted to check on his cousin so badly. To call. For SOMETHING but he couldn’t. They learned that Steve’s freshman year when he tried to sneak over to check on him.

Gareth wished he was able to fight the second he saw Steve’s face after Hargrove. He hated the rumors. All the shit people kept saying about Steve. He heard of the concussion and the injuries. 

He was so worried until a week after everything a group of kids were surrounding Steve’s car. Steve seemed… happy? He kept watching Steve. Waiting. Hoping for the day it’s safe for them to just be Stevie and Gar again. He misses when they were just fucking children.

When Steve graduated he expected Steve to up and leave. But then word got around of Steve not going to college. Of how the Harringtons cut him off.

A week into the summer he was shocked when late at night Steve was at his door.

For the first time since they were children they fell asleep curled up together. Holding their twin bunnies. If they cried that night? That was a secret for them and them alone.

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Robin wears a full yellow rainsuit set when it rains and mr fashionista Steve Harrington looks at her in horror the first time he sees her in it but then buys her yellow rain boots with ducks on them and holds a yellow umbrella in solidarity w/ her horrific fashion choice. Him holding it out the one she bought for him with a grimace, but seeing her excited face and going,, “oh ha ha this is…wonderful robs, I love the,, tacky texture and the firetruck engine red.. So great” with his best plastered on smile of his life just “ill cherish it” *tears streaming down his face*

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Songs that would kill Steve Harrington if he listened to them:

Love me more by Mitski

Father by The Front Bottoms

Cut to the feeling by Carly Rae Jepsen

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I love when a pov is so in character that we know the character they're talking about is not like that in the slightest, but it's how they perceive them. We see how the character views others and the world around them without the knowledge of everyone's characterization seeping into it.

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Whenever more bigtop burger drops i need you guys to tell me immediatly ok . Come into my house slam the door down The Minute you see worthis little name on your screen with bigtop burger new episode in all its glory on the Youtueb . Quapiche. ? 👍 ok good

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It Takes Faith

Thinking about Steve and Lucas shooting hoops in a local park after everything happens. Max and Eddie are both still in the hospital, and Steve should be resting, too (a nasty infection that got worse before it got better), but Lucas is anxious. Restless.

Steve knows how to help with that. He can't fix anything, he can't offer solutions, but he can listen. So he takes Lucas to the park under the pretense of working on his form.

At first, they don't speak at all. Lucas is in his head, and Steve is patient.

They stretch, get warmed up. Jog back and forth across the court for a bit until Lucas gives Steve this look. He's ready to play.

Steve starts with the ball, and gets the first point without too much trouble. He doesn't go easy on Lucas; Lucas doesn't want him to.

Whatever advantage Steve might have from experience gets balanced out by the fact that he's simply not well, though, so it's not long before Lucas is beating him out.

After a certain point Steve's barely playing anymore, too exhausted to go running after the ball or shoot.

He's just standing between Lucas and the hoop, now, watching as Lucas shoots, then passing the ball back to him when it goes through the net.

It's nearing sunset when Lucas finally says something.

"Do you think they'll wake up? Either of them?"

Steve doesn't know. He hopes so. Can't let himself believe that they won't. "They're fighters," he says instead. "Both of them."

Lucas frowns. He bounces the ball once, twice. Makes like he's going to shoot, and then sighs.

He sits down on the pavement and buries his face in his hands.

"Hey," Steve says, softly. His core strength isn't what it was before the bats tried to eat him, so it's a struggle, but he manages to sit himself down next to Lucas. He puts a hand on his shoulder. "It'll be ok."

"How can you know that?" He's very nearly as tall as Steve now, but curled in on himself like this Steve is reminded of how small he used to be. How small all the kids used to be.

"I don't," Steve admits. Lucas curls himself even tighter. "But we gotta believe, right?"

"I guess."

Steve takes the ball from Lucas. "When you're lining up a shot, you have no way of actually knowing it will go in, right?"

Lucas gives him a look, but he doesn't interrupt.

"You know how to throw the ball. Where to aim it. But you don't know until it's in."

He mimes the action of setting up a shot. "You just gotta trust your body to get the ball where it needs to go. It's the same thing."

"It's really not."

"It is. All it takes is faith. We gotta trust that they'll pull through. We can make it easier for them, that'll help, but—"

Lucas cuts in. "But what if she doesn't?"

Steve's jaw snaps shut. He gives Lucas' shoulder a comforting squeeze.

"What if she never wakes up? How am I supposed to just— just— keep going? I already miss her so much."

"You can't think like that."

Lucas glares at the pavement.

"I know you miss her." Steve does, too. Fuck, he misses her so much. "She'd kick your ass if she heard you talking like that, though."

"Yeah." Lucas huffs out something that sounds a little like a chuckle, a little like a sob. "I know."

"Whatever happens, we'll work through it. As a team, right?" He gives Lucas' shoulder a small shake. "Max will wake up. I know she will. But she needs your support, too, ok? So don't go doubting her now."

Lucas nods. He sniffs and scrubs his hands over his face. "Ok. I won't."

"Good." He struggles up to his feet, and then offers a hand out to Lucas.

Lucas accepts, but doesn't actually let Steve take on any of his weight. He knows that Steve is still hurt, no matter how healed he tries to present himself as.

"Come on," Steve says "Let's get you home."

Later, when Steve's alone again, he climbs up to his room. He stumbles into the bathroom, ignores his reflection when he passes by the mirror, and throws himself into the shower.

The water is as hot as he can stand it. He sits down in the tub and feels the water hit his skin.

When he's done, he barely has enough energy left to towel off. He collapses into bed, ignoring clothes entirely, and turns onto his side to watch the last bits of sunset through the crack in his blinds.

After it's dark, he digs around under his pillow.

Eddie's vest is still covered in blood and grime. It's crusty and stiff and stained, but even through all that Steve can still smell smoke and cheap detergent.

He cradles it against his chest, and thinks of all the things he really wants to say now. Things might not get to say.

Steve doesn't believe in God, he hasn't since he came face to face with a monster in the Byers' living room, but still he prays. He prays that Eddie and Max will wake up. That they'll be ok.

Max's hair tie is around his wrist, and Eddie's vest is under his pillow. Always.

He needs them to wake up.

He needs his little sister back.

He needs his— his— He needs Eddie back.

Max's letter is unopened on his bedside table. He won't read it. Whatever she has to say to him, she can say when she wakes up.

What Steve has to say to Eddie will wait, too. It will wait until he wakes up. Until he's well again.

He just has to believe.