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Glasses are a *very* valuable accessory for me, but what can I say? We can’t all be Troy McClure, star of such as notable films as The Erotic Adventures of Hercules, Christmas Ape, and Christmas Ape Goes To Summer Camp.

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Test

Testing testing testing *drops mic, walks away*

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Following “The Following”

*I recently started watching “The Following” while waiting for “Hannibal” to return. This post is my review of “The Following” in general and the episode “Flesh and Blood” in particular. There are spoilers for that episode here, and I talk about the show as a whole in a broadly analytical sort of way.

Since “The Following” and “Hannibal” premiered, the two have been compared (often to the detriment of the former). While both shows feature a lot of disturbing violence, “Hannibal” has always managed to invest its gore with a certain artistic appeal, due partially to the fact that we often only see the aftermath of grisly crimes and not the acts in progress. “The Following,” by contrast, shows a lot of people get butchered, and while the more creative acts are often spaced out in favor of more traditional (I guess?) knifings, the sound of metal entering flesh is enhanced (as it always is in these sorts of shows), and I would agree with the people who say that there is something especially ghastly and even cynical about the way that people die in “The Following”—often suddenly, violently, and without aplomb. The killings are usually even more brutal because of how sudden, unremarkable, and, therefore, realistic they can be.

I will be completely honest here: Before season three of “The Following,” I had seen only a handful of episodes. I remember seeing two or three chapters from season one and maybe that many episodes of season two. I know the premise of the show, and I have read synopses of plots online while also keeping up with the AV Club’s review coverage, which seems to have stopped with season two—a decision that makes sense given the clear revulsion expressed by the reviewers for the show previously.

That revulsion is justified. Although I’m not keeping a running total or anything, I am paying attention to the show to see how many women it offs versus men. I started watching season three with episode three, and so far I haven’t been overwhelmed by the deaths. The violence seems pretty evenly distributed, though as is the case with most such shows, there is a huge imbalance in the number of men depicted (favoring this gender) in contrast to the smaller number of women. This means, of course, that each woman killed hits home harder given the very small number that the show is working with. Other reviewers, particularly the AV Club, have discussed the series’ treatment of women in the past, as well as its (fumbled) handling of gay characters; therefore, given the fact that I have seen so little of the show, I do not feel qualified to make certain claims about its depiction of either. I do get the sense watching the show that women seem to end up being less informed than the men—if that makes sense. The women feel somewhat more hapless or less in the know. I guess I am speaking from the position of just having watched “Flesh and Blood,” where the serial killer training doctor Strauss’s so-called “best student” Theo Noble does in his family and then disappears into the night after Hardy and gang finally uncover his identity.

Now, this might be the comparatively small number of episodes under my belt talking, but I didn’t hate Theo’s storyline (or what I’ve seen of it so far). One of the best moments of “Flesh and Blood” comes when Theo’s phone pings to let him know that the FBI is accessing his wife’s DMV records. He silently sits down on the couch and puts his head in his hands. By this point, the viewer is pretty much aware of the fact that Theo’s humanity is all an act. We’ve seen him seamlessly shift from highly-focused killer to personable co-worker and loving husband enough times to know who he really is, but what is great about this moment on the couch is when Theo raises his head again and we can literally see the human mask is lifted. He has eyes like a shark. The dramatic irony of his character arch (with the viewer evaluating his every human gesture and appreciating it for what it is—a calculated act) builds a lot of suspense that all comes together in this moment, which is a great character beat and a testament to Michael Ealy’s acting chops. And then there is the actual murder of his wife (which we don’t see) and the reveal that he has not murdered his children, and all this throws a bit of doubt into the mix. Clearly, Theo has a shred of humanity in him. I fully expected the kids to bite the big one as well so that they couldn’t aid Hardy in his investigation through some accidental reveal of pertinent information or something (though Theo’s decision to leave them alive while killing his wife makes coldly logical sense given the way that he has so perfectly kept his other life from them and that as kids they will naturally be less useful to his pursuers than his discerning wife might be)…

But I digress. In this same episode, I was also pleased by Joe’s fantasy escape sequence. It was all too much to believe from the start, though the viewer is easily suckered into believing it on some level given Joe’s history of escape from improbable odds and the good guys’ general lack of intelligence and foresight up to this point. When Joe emerges into daylight, though, and Ryan Hardy comes speeding up in the get-away vehicle, that’s just the icing on the cake. “The Following” is clearly trying to restore some of its Hannibal-esque FBI agent/Intelligent monster prisoner dynamic this season with Hardy consulting Joe in prison and the (uncertain) relationship developing between the two. This isn’t without precedent, of course. See Hannibal and Clarice (or Will). See Batman and the Joker. See any Japanese animated series with a spunky protagonist and his/her antihero opposite. “The Following” is strongly implying that Hardy and Joe need each other on some level, and I’ll second the AV Club reviewer who noted in season two that the characters have great chemistry together. If only there was some way to finagle a partnership between the two. Maybe we off the corporeal Joe and he accompanies Hardy via hallucination or split personality on future cases? Hmm.

One thing that I have consistently noticed when I watch “The Following,” though, is that I have a particular gut reaction whenever Hardy and co. close in on a villain. Yes, weird as it feels to admit it out loud (so to speak), when Theo was dawdling at his wife’s side, saying goodbye in his own psychopathic way, I was anxiously thinking, “Go, man, go! Get out of there. We know that there hasn’t been a door made yet that Ryan Hardy can’t put a boot through and he’s on his way!” I don’t identify with Theo, however. I don’t empathize with either the villains or heroes on this show. The heroes are boring and violent and overbearingly masculine. The villains are a bit too good at being villainous at times (I guess). And yet my gut seized when the box maker earlier this season was forced to abandon his father, who has dementia, and run straight into a trap set by Hardy and pals. I hated seeing Daisy and Kyle split up. I wanted Hardy and friends to arrest the wrong tech guy so that Theo could keep going under the radar—and it would have been something like a nice experiment for “The Following” to let him go, in fact, and send a message about how sometimes killers get away and they’re just out there, undramatically living something approximating a normal life—which would have been (and still could be) a fitting end for a character like Theo who is supposed to be smart and not theatrical like Joe.

But I’m off on Theo again. I’m not sure where my nervousness for these roundly unlikable folks comes from. Maybe it’s just basic human empathy. Maybe I feel a twinge of sadness knowing that they’ll probably be illegally shot by Mike or tortured by Hardy in lieu of justice. Maybe feelings of unease about law enforcement makes a lot more sense today than immediately rooting for the guy with the badge. And maybe this is like Dandy’s massacre at the end of “American Horror Story: Freak Show.” What Dandy does is cold-blooded and awful, but because he was the only character that brought a spark of life to the proceedings of the past twelve episodes (some of which he wasn’t even in, though the anticipation for more of his unpredictable, unsettling behavior remained) I wanted him to get away with it and go on being interesting.

There’s nothing laudable or even sympathetic about what the villains of “The Following” do, but I guess they’re slightly more likable for it because they have no illusions. While this was originally marketed as a show about good guys and bad guys, such binaries no longer make a lot of sense to us as viewers. They never did, really, but it was easier to root for characters who didn’t use excessive violence and torture themselves and then justify it through the authority of a government agency. The only interesting thing about agent Hardy, for example, is the same thing that makes characters like Joe and Theo interesting, though to a slightly lesser degree: his propensity for violence and the promise, each episode, of the possibility of more door kicking and suspect torturing. We want him to defy his boss’s authority because it means he gets to go on doing what he does—being a loose cannon and such. Likewise, Joe has to live because he is violent and “interesting.” That seems like a terrible excuse to keep the story going or to tune in each week (and the dropping review scores suggest that people aren’t finding that enough), but it’s what “The Following” has got. It’s violent, cynical, but interesting to see how long it can persist in being violent and cynical before it finally gets euthanized.

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Reblog if you think someone can be transgender without the surgery

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The Madrilenial Butterfly is a blood-sucking species of butterfly. Although it eats nectar, it also drinks blood from the dead carcasses of animals. 

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The man who does not read has no advantage over the man who cannot read.

Mark Twain (via purplebuddhaproject)

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Female Psycopaths in Film

“Isn’t it time to acknowledge the ugly side? I’ve grown quite weary of the spunky heroines, brave rape victims, soul-searching fashionistas that stock so many books. I particularly mourn the lack of female villains — good, potent female villains. Not ill-tempered women who scheme about landing good men and better shoes (as if we had nothing more interesting to war over), not chilly WASP mothers (emotionally distant isn’t necessarily evil), not soapy vixens (merely bitchy doesn’t qualify either). I’m talking violent, wicked women. Scary women. Don’t tell me you don’t know some. The point is, women have spent so many years girl-powering ourselves — to the point of almost parodic encouragement — we’ve left no room to acknowledge our dark side. Dark sides are important. They should be nurtured like nasty black orchids.”  - Gillian Flynn

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Gotta go fast?     Get some pants.

exclusive pants

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Problematic TV Ads

If you are a dude and not sure how to dude, Dish's informative TV ad will help you get your dude levels up to maximum: Step 1) Acquire $50 off coupons to distribute to friends; Step 2) Give coupon to hot neighbor girl; Step 3) Tell hot neighbor girl, "That's what friends are for!" (Eye camera the entire time; you are not a friend--you are out to get the booty, but the girl will not know this b/c she is a girl and you have just given her a valuable coupon and she will probably not friendzone you). Remember: "First they love Dish, then they love you!" (Disclaimer: They may not love Dish or you, but they probably will b/c you are a dude dude-ing to the max!)

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"I even love some of his plots." Hmm.

What do you think of Thomas Pynchon?

Wonderful writer. I love his sentences. I even love some of his plots.

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giving trans women roles to cis men 

robs trans women actors (who can’t get cis women roles) and gives those roles to cis men who already have an enormous amount of roles and opportunities

reinforces the false idea that trans woman are somehow equivalent or analagous to cis men in costume 

like really thats all there is to it. theres nothing you can say that justifies this practice

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shrek one: BEST

shrek two: the funniest movie i have ever seen. literally one of the funniest comedies of all time. incredible pacing and dialogue. reference jokes that were actually funny. surreal world that was so modern fantasy it actually worked. rocking score. awesome scene set to "i need a hero" being sung by the villain unironically and completely played straight. a bar of villains. just overall the best concepts ever.

shrek three: bad

shrek four: bad

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ABUSIVE MEN COME in every personality type, arise from good childhoods and bad ones, are macho men or gentle, “liberated” men. No psychological test can distinguish an abusive man from a respectful one. Abusiveness is not a product of a man’s emotional injuries or of deficits in his skills. In reality, abuse springs from a man’s early cultural training, his key male role models, and his peer influences. In other words, abuse is a problem of values, not of psychology.

Why Does He Do That by Lundy Bancroft (via friendlyangryfeminist)

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last night i got asked out by not one, not two, but zero people

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Politically, I'm angered because most (though not all) of this silliness is emanating from the self-proclaimed Left. We're witnessing here a profound historical volte-face. For most of the past two centuries, the Left has been identified with science and against obscurantism; we have believed that rational thought and the fearless analysis of objective reality (both natural and social) are incisive tools for combating the mystifications promoted by the powerful -- not to mention being desirable human ends in their own right. The recent turn of many ``progressive'' or ``leftist'' academic humanists and social scientists toward one or another form of epistemic relativism betrays this worthy heritage and undermines the already fragile prospects for progressive social critique. Theorizing about ``the social construction of reality'' won't help us find an effective treatment for AIDS or devise strategies for preventing global warming. Nor can we combat false ideas in history, sociology, economics and politics if we reject the notions of truth and falsity.

Alan D. Sokal, "A Physicist Experiments With Cultural Studies" (http://www.physics.nyu.edu/sokal/lingua_franca_v4/lingua_franca_v4.html)