#why does he do that

[judeesill]

it’s amazing how radblr has invented whole cloth a canon of “radical feminist” thought that has almost nothing to do with any movement history and draws almost exclusively on a bunch of bloggers and like, five books, only half of which are by even self-proclaimed radical feminists

[if-you-dont-ask-me-to-stay]

Ok sorry to anyone who hasn’t read the sunshine court but spoiler Jean spends the entire first five chapters earnestly talking to his TV it’s happened at least ten times and i fear I am in love

[dominoeffectt]

Spider-Posting

[transneilyoung]

my favorite bits of bob dylan concert footage is when he starts playing the harmonica but immediately turns away from the mic and walks away from it so all you hear is a single loud note

[svblimes]

[sadiowaboy]

this is the perfect man

[laufire]

THERAPISTS AND EVALUATORS We need to take a large step back in time for a moment, to the early part of Freud’s era, when modern psychology was born. In the 1890s, when Freud was in the dawn of his , he was struck by how many of his female patients were revealing childhood incest victimization to him. Freud concluded that child sexual abuse was one of the major causes of emotional disturbances in adult women and wrote a brilliant and humane paper called “The Aetiology of Hysteria.” However, rather than receiving acclaim from his colleagues for his ground-breaking insights, Freud met with scorn. He was ridiculed for believing that men of excellent reputation (most of his patients came from upstanding homes) could be perpetrators of incest. Within a few years, Freud buckled under this heavy pressure and recanted his conclusions. In their place he proposed the “Oedipus complex,” which became the foundation of modern psychology. According to this theory any young girl actually desires sexual contact with her father, because she wants to compete with her mother to be the most special person in his life. Freud used this construct to conclude that the episodes of incestuous abuse his clients had revealed to him had never taken place; they were simply fantasies of events the women had wished for when they were children and that the women had come to believe were real. This construct started a hundred-year history in the mental health field of blaming victims for the abuse perpetrated on them and outright discrediting of women’s and children’s reports of mistreatment by men. Once abuse was denied in this way, the stage was set for some psychologists to take the view that any violent or sexually exploitative behaviors that couldn’t be denied—because they were simply too obvious—should be considered mutually caused. Psychological literature is thus full of descriptions of young children who “seduce” adults into sexual encounters and of women whose “provocative” behavior causes men to become violent or sexually assaultive toward them.

–"Why does he do that?: inside the minds of angry and controlling men.“, by Lundy Bancroft. Chapter 11, Abusive Men and Their Allies.

[thepalerimitation]

Some dumb bitch minding their business: ….

*complete silence*

….

*utter silence*

David Tennant flapping about in a trench coat: WEEEEELL

[digupyourbones]

underrated jerma noise

[eve-ate-the-right-fruit]

I've been re-reading Lundy Bancroft's Why Does He Do That? and I am revisited with rage that Johnny Depp got the entire internet and pop culture at large to extend his abuse of Amber Heard. Textbook abuser manipulation and millions fell for it

[hearteyesblog]

No ones talking about how Spiderman doesnt need glasses yet Peter is wearing glasses..did he just put them on to feel studious? questions..

[facelesspassport]

The Boiler Theory of Men

When talking about an abusive or dangerous man, do you ever hear things like, "He holds in his feelings too much, and they build up until he bursts... He needs to get in touch with his emotions and learn to express them to prevent those explosive episodes"? "My colleagues and I refer to this belief as "The Boiler Theory of men." The idea that a person can only tolerate so much accumulated pain and frustration. If it doesn't get vented periodically-- kind of like a pressure cooker-- then there's bound to be a serious accident. This... has the ring of truth to it because we are all aware of how many men keep too much emotion pent up inside. Since most abusers are male, it seems to add up. But it doesn't, and here's why: Most [abusive men] are not unusually repressed. In fact, many of them express their feelings more than some nonabusive men. Rather than trapping everything inside, they actually tend to do the opposite: They have an exaggerated idea of how important their own feelings are, and they talk about their feelings-- and act them out-- all the time, until their partners and children are exhausted from hearing about it all. An abuser's emotions are as likely to be too big as too small. They can fill up the whole house." - Day 4 of sharing Lundy Bancroft's excerpts from Why Does he DO That? I would like to add this: I'm sure many of you have seen that people especially love to use this myth to justify atrocities like mass shootings and other "crimes of passion" that result in the deaths of innocent people. The reality is that men who behave in abusive ways are not victims of society. They are not bottling up their emotions, in need of a place to vent, suffering from low self-esteem, etc. It is quite the opposite. These men are suffering from being over-emotional, grandiose, and entitled. Notice how men will always go on shooting sprees shortly after finding communities of like minded individuals, venting their frustrations to them, and spending hours a day exchanging information with peers (all things that are supposed to help people get better)?. They meet people in cyberspace and real life: places such as 4chan, "redpill" forums, on-campus white nationalist club meetings, Fraternities, bars, "mens rights" rallies and it emboldens them to finally unleash their rage onto the public. Perhaps if we stopped having such bleeding hearts and took away their platforms these men would shrivel back up and stay in their parents basements where they belong. Just an idea.

[bulldyke-rider]

"Why does he do that?" is such an important book. I think every woman should give it a real. Even if you just go to the end of the chapter and read the summary of each section.

[banginbarzy]

panthers fans who are more weathered than i am, why does sam reinhart do that thing

[sparklywaistcoat]

Please read this book.

For the love of God, please read it, and take it to heart.

[its-obviously-salmon]

Love how King Candy just freaking jingles when he walks-