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HAPPY BIRTHDAY SAEYOUNG, SAERAN!

*pops confetti* yay more mystic messenger art! I just couldn’t stop myself from drawing these two precious bois pls QAQ 

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THE! END!

I have never loved the colour green more in my life.

I know I left a final author’s note in the story but I wanted to leave my thoughts specifically in relation to Tumblr and my experience in this fandom :) so here it all goes under the cut

Won’t repeat whatever I said in the final A/N here, so this won’t take long. 

It has been an insanely wild ride in the Mystic Messenger fandom esp here on Tumblr. This was the first-ever fandom that I participated so actively in, and sometimes I look back and really miss it all because I met so many amazing people on this site and got to grow so much too. I haven’t counted how many Saeran fics I have on this blog but I’m guessing somewhere between 30-50 fics? LOL. 

Thank you for supporting my writing journey here on tumblr, I recognise a bunch of the usernames when I see them pop up in my notifications, and I want to say thanks for consistently being there to support me whether it’s with a like or a reblog or a reply to let me know how many tears you have shed :) It was a little bit harder to keep going with BA as time went on because understandably a lot of people left the fandom and also with my irregular updates even I wouldn’t want to read it until it’s completed, or maybe as a reader I would have lost interest by now. But you guys stuck with me and were the ones who really got me through the times when I wanted to give up. So thank you. Really couldn’t have done this without you. 

I’ll still be checking in on this blog from time to time for notifications and stuff, but I’m a lot more active on @my-soul-sings​ if you wanna follow me there :) Thanks again for everything! <3 I hope you all stay safe and well, please take care :) 

Love, Sherms

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Believe Again: Chapter 36 (FINAL)

Chapter 36 (FINAL): Messy, Broken, but Perfect

Read on AO3 and FF.net! 

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my fingers slipped and i think i just wrote the last chapter of BA without intending to

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Believe Again: Chapter 35

Chapter 35: I love you

✨the reunion, finally ✨

Read on AO3 or FF.net! 

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Believe Again: Chapter 34

Chapter 34: Found

Read on AO3 and FF.net!

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Believe Again: Chapter 33

Chapter 33: Three Years Later

Read on AO3 and FF.net! 

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Believe Again: Chapter 33 (Preview)

Three years later

When Saeran left the apartment this morning, it was clean, pristine and neat. He had left everything in order, having been the last one on cleaning duty over the weekend.

But now… eight hours later, he had returned… only to find that the apartment now looked like it had been completely and utterly ravaged. There was a (thankfully) wrapped diaper lying abandoned in a corner, splotches of milk powder on the floor, and little white footprints mixed with big ones trailing into the hallway. The couch looked like someone had been using it as a trampoline, pillows and cushions had been left on the floor, children’s books and toys were scattered everywhere like leaves in fall, and the dining table was a mess of food stains, some of which looked suspiciously like vomit.

Saeran had come home early, skipping out on dinner with his friends at college because MC wanted him home for dinner today. But he was starting to regret his decision when he surveyed the apartment, a grimace forming on his features when he realized he would almost certainly be dragged into cleaning everything up together with his stupid brother. Said man had one simple job today: to babysit his three-year-old child, while MC went out to do some grocery shopping.

And as expected, he had failed spectacularly at it.

The wind slammed the door shut loudly before Saeran could grab the handle. Not thinking much of it, Saeran shrugged and entered, but was promptly startled by a wail—one that belonged not to his niece, but to his brother.

Saeran sighed, carefully tip-toeing his way past the minefield of dirt to avoid getting his socks dirty. He managed past the living room and was about to approach the hallway that looked equally disastrous, when he heard an adorable, heart-stopping voice.

“Ran? Un-ko?”

Saeran froze in his tracks, wavering slightly as he almost lost his balance in the awkward position he was standing in, with one foot directly in front of the other. He was this close to stepping on a puddle of water, and he refused to get his socks wet.

The voice was followed by the sound of little feet running across the floor, like the soft pitter-patter of rain. Saeran’s eyes darted to the source of the noise, and there he found his little niece, with her wild bedhead and rubbing her big, yellow eyes. It was the most adorable thing to watch—the moment she noticed him, he watched as the sleepiness in her features evaporated in a flash, her lips parting into the brightest beam he had ever seen.

And then she was running towards him, releasing a high-pitched squeal as she went as if she were a train.

Saeran didn’t even have time to register his foot stepping into the water when she practically slammed her face against his calf, her little arms wrapping tightly around his leg like a koala to a tree.

“Unko Ran!” she cried happily, and Saeran didn’t even realise he was smiling until he noticed the slight ache in his cheeks. He bent down and scooped her into his arms easily, listening to the sound of her laugh echoing off the walls.

“Were you a good girl today, Eun-byeol?”

“Yes!” she nodded enthusiastically, cheeks turning a rosy pink as she held his cheek with one tiny hand. “Play, play!”

“I was just about to put her to sleep…” Another voice emerged, and Saeran craned his neck to see his brother slinking out of the bedroom, looking like Death itself. His hair was a complete mess, and he had what looked like marker stains on his arms and face—he must have let her use him as paper again.  

It took a moment for Saeran to realise what had probably happened, his mind going back to the loud sound that the door created when it slammed shut earlier.

“Sorry, I didn’t catch the door handle in time. The wind was too strong.”

Saeyoung merely sighed, but it seemed more exhausted than anything else. Saeran could only guess at what on earth happened in this house today. No doubt, his niece must have been a handful—she had inherited her mischievousness from Saeyoung and her stubbornness from MC. And that made for one very difficult and out-of-control kid.

Saeran remembered Saeyoung retelling how Vanderwood had laughed when he first begged him to help babysit, saying something about how “karma’s a bitch” before hanging up on him altogether.

As terrible as it sounded, Saeran couldn’t help but agree.

The most peculiar thing was that for some reason, his niece had taken an exceptional liking to him, attached to him at the hip and always wanting to play with him. It didn’t help that “Un-ko” were her first words, instead of “Mama” or “Papa”. That had upset MC and Saeyoung both so much that Saeran almost felt guilty for playing with Eun-byeol whenever she so asked.

But it wasn’t like he could refuse her, not when she was so cute. She had big, round yellow eyes, fat cheeks that he loved to poke and pinch, long, wavy red hair that made her look like an angel, and her voice was adorable too. Especially when she called his name. Like she was doing now.

“Yes, yes, I’m here,” he chuckled, patting her on the head.

“She was asking about you all day, you know. Ever since we told her that you were staying for dinner today. She even refused to take her nap until you were back.”

“You were?” Saeran asked, turning his attention back to his niece, who was beaming at him proudly once again, as if she had achieved something huge. Well, he supposed, to a three-year-old, staying up past naptime was a huge feat in itself.

“Play, Unko Ran!”

“But you need to nap first.”

His answer didn’t please the three-year-old. Her lips dropped into a pout, and she shook her head. “No, play play!”

“We’ll play after you nap,” he told her firmly, already walking back to the bedroom where she had emerged from. She started to struggle, and he had to tighten his hold around her lest she fell out of his grasp.

“No! No!”

“If you’re good, I’ll let you crack the eggs later.”  

That was the most effective bribe he had up his sleeve. Saeran smiled to himself when he watched her pause thoughtfully, mentally calculating the pros and cons of his suggestion. She had been obsessed with cracking eggs ever since they made pancakes together in the kitchen, of course while she was seated safely in her high-chair and watched Saeran do all the work. She had pleaded and begged for him to let her try cracking the eggs but he hadn’t allowed it. It took a while to placate her by giving her a slice of lemon to play with instead.

“Okay…”

She was rewarded with a peck on the forehead. “That’s my girl.”

It didn’t take long for him to put her to sleep—since she had been staying up past her naptime she was already exhausted. Within five minutes she was out cold, although it took another minute for him to carefully wrestle his index finger out from her grasp without waking her.

When Saeran left the room, he was greeted by the sight of Saeyoung wiping the floor with a wet cloth. He took a moment to watch his brother do the work, sighing as he went and looking thoroughly drained.

Parenthood was certainly taking its toll on this inexperienced father who couldn’t do anything without his wife.

In an uncommon show of sympathy, Saeran stepped forward, snatched the rag from his brother, who then looked at him, confused.

“Go sleep. You look horrible,” was all he said, before he took over and started wiping the same spot that his brother had earlier.

Saeran hated cleaning already, and his stupid brother just had to make it worse by squealing his name and throwing his arms around him in a hug. It took two kicks before Saeyoung finally let go, rubbing at the sore spots on his thigh but still wearing the silly, idiotic grin on his face.

“Thanks, Saeran. I appreciate it.”

“Just shut up and go to sleep or I’ll knock you out myself.”

***

A/N: I’m so sorry that this took so long, I died during recess week lmao and I actually had this part written out before but then I scrapped everything and re-did it soooooo yeah.

I ended up thinking more about how I can develop the plot to end things on a fluffier and happier note, which is why this probably isn’t the last chapter (AAAAAA I WAS SO READY FOR IT TO END BUT AT THE SAME TIME I WANT FLUFF) 

so yeah i’ll TRY MY BEST. To upload soon. But also finals are in like a moNTH so :D Anyways I’ll definitely have time to work on this after finals so wheeee it’s just a matter of time (I’m SORRY THAT I ALWAYS KEEP PPL WAITING am truly unreliable but :”(((( thx for sticking with this story i rly rly appreciate it) 

okay enough rant from me i’ll try working on this chapter more although my plan is for it to be p r e t t y  l o a d e d so it miiiight not come so soon either. I’ll just try :) 

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Brothers and flowers.

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Are you sure we’re talking about the same V? 

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Sketchbooks with 707-proof locks should be a thing. On that note, RFA members enjoy the fanart! Most of the time XD  

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changed my mind... AGAIN.

i’m gonna extend the story a little, purely to include SaeranxReader fluff (or angst?) :) 

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A/N: Decided to split the final chapter into two parts, because I verbal diarrhea-ed the rest of this chapter and decided this would be a good place to stop :)

Chapter 32: ‘If’

Read on AO3 and FF.net!

Believe Again: Chapter 32 (Preview)

A/N: I am so ready to get all this pent-up verbal diarrhea out of my system!!! I have waited !!! 4 years to get to write the freaking end of this story!!!!

So this is going to be the last chapter of BA (if it gets too long then maybe I will split it into 2 but my gut feel is that this will be the last), and there will be an epilogue or two after that… :)

Thanks for sticking by me guys <3 Would never have gotten this far into the story without your support. :)

Keep reading

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Believe Again: Chapter 32 (Preview)

A/N: I am so ready to get all this pent-up verbal diarrhea out of my system!!! I have waited !!! 4 years to get to write the freaking end of this story!!!!

So this is going to be the last chapter of BA (if it gets too long then maybe I will split it into 2 but my gut feel is that this will be the last), and there will be an epilogue or two after that... :)

Thanks for sticking by me guys <3 Would never have gotten this far into the story without your support. :)

***

When Saeran woke, it was all over.

Mint Eye had been exposed—the illegal experiments taking place, the suspected associations it had with the government and other people involved in dealings with Park Ha Yoon, the government funding for this organization… Everything was broadcast on national television, with the aid of Jaehee and Jumin. It kept the politicians busy enough, buying time for Saeyoung, MC and Saeran to safely flee the country.

As for Park Ha Yoon… well, Saeyoung couldn’t tell him for sure what had happened, and there was no news following his abrupt disappearance. They could only assume that he was dead, and with all the information about Saeran out of Mint Eye’s system files, there would be no one else coming after him.

It was all finally over. All those years of pain, brainwashing, struggling to be good enough… everything was over. He was safe now, with his family, and he could finally put everything behind him, put it all in the past.

But that applied to other things as well. The bunker, the RFA, the park… her.

There hadn’t been time to talk or to explain. When he woke up, he had already found himself in a hospital room, and the nurse who entered didn’t look Korean. Neither did the doctor.

It didn’t take long for him to realise that he was no longer in Korea.

He had left. For good. And he didn’t even get to see her again, make sure she was alright after going through all of that in Mint Eye.

Then again, how could she be alright? There was just no way.

The last thing that he remembered of her was her anguished screams, and the scars that Sejun had left on her arm. That mark that he had so desperately tried to erase with the cuts and scars embedded in his skin. Everything was still fresh in his head, and there were many nights where he would be haunted by a nightmarish recount of the scene where she was practically being tortured in front of him. Because of him.

Maybe it was for the better after all that he didn’t see her again. She probably wanted nothing to do with him after this, and he wouldn’t blame her. As long as she was safe now, that was all that mattered. Saeyoung said that she had been brought to a hospital and that Jumin had promised to make sure she recovered well.

That was really all he could ask for. The ache in his chest was nothing he couldn’t handle.

Saeyoung and MC had both apologized profusely for taking him away like that, not giving him the chance to say goodbye, but it wasn’t their fault. They were all lucky enough to be alive considering everything that had happened, and to have escaped here to Switzerland with no hitches along the way.

Still. He couldn’t help but miss home. The bunker that Saeyoung had practically dragged him to after taking him away from Mint Eye the first time, the stupid passwords that his brother liked to put on the gate, the smell of MC’s cooking in the kitchen… Then there was the park. The place that he went to when he needed a breath of fresh air, to get away from the bad thoughts in his head on the bad days. He would find his favourite bench, the one that offered him the best, clearest view of the sky above.

And then there was her. Walking past him, stealing glances at him as she passed, eventually joining him on the park bench and sharing ice cream with him on Fridays.

He missed her. So much that it hurt more than the throbbing headache or the sting of acid in his throat each time he threw up.

It was like a fairy tale story that had come and gone with the wind. He had spent enough time dreaming, and it was time to return to reality. This was where he belonged—with Saeyoung and MC. His family.

And that was really all he could ask for.

…Or maybe, he could just ask for one more thing:

Please… please be alright.

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Believe Again: Chapter 31

Chapter 31: Rescue Mission (Part 2)

Read on AO3 or FF.net! 

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are you still writing for Heal Me?

Hello! Sorry, I’m not :( Initially I was really excited to write it but it was supposed to be a story project after BA was completed, and now tbh I’m mostly out of the MM fandom already (it’s been a great couple years and I still love this community) and the only thing I’m really committed to is the completion of BA for the people who have continued to support it even after so many years. :”) Really blessed to have such an amazing community in this fandom!! I don’t think I’ll ever get to experience something like this ever again lol. :”D 

But thanks for asking about Heal Me, anon! I’m so sorry that I couldn’t continue it, I know there were a few people asking me about it :(  

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hi guys heres a random reminder to back up ur comp/writing drafts if u havent... my laptop completely crashed like 2 days ago and the place I left it with for repair said the CPU burned and the info in it cant be retrieved :’)

Thank God i posted the freaking preview of BA’s next chapter here or I would have lost my progress on it >_>

But yes if you havent done a backup recently please do it bc u never know what will happen!!!! 🤡🤡🤡