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[nikorolenko-blog]

woods-canvas

“Speak for yourself… I’m in over my head and classes haven’t even started yet.” Peter handed over his schedule–five classes and three extracurriculars–and sighed. “It would take me three years to do all this and actually sleep, I think.”

“Well I’m retaking a good majority of the classes I had last year.” Nik chuckled, nodding to Peter and his description of his sleep deprivation. “As long s there’s some sleep in there you shouldn’t be too bad off.”

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I believe pain breeds wolves and joys give rise to moons. We grow forests in our bones so our memories can’t find us. I believe we hide and haunt ourselves.

Pavana (via thatkindofwoman)

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“Well at least this year’s classes will undoubtedly be a breeze.”

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declanbouchard:

“You’re really not going to give up on him, are you?” Declan said with a roll of his eyes. Nikolai’s tenacity was almost ridiculous. Then again, maybe he was just bitter. He’d given up on Marcus himself, and he’d done it much too easily. He shook his head. “The rest of the world isn’t like this. People still tell you what to do out there, but you can at least pretend you’ve got the power to say no. Who exactly do we have the right to say no to now?” He stared at Nik. It really wasn’t fair that Nik was the one who understood this mess. Aiden just didn’t get it, no matter how much he tried to, and Peter had to literally get inside his head to understand. This way felt easier, but also distinctly more uncomfortable. “How much do you know, really?” he asked. “Do you have a father… you know, like mine? Because if you do, then you’d have to know that I didn’t choose to get stuck like this, and I fucking want out. Get it?” He shook his head. “Don’t tell me that,” he said. “Don’t tell me things can get worse. My childhood friend and his brother are dead, I’ll be married in a year, and that’s if my father doesn’t decide to fuck Gabriel up instead. So tell me, why shouldn’t I act like the sky is falling? Because it is. It’s just taking its sweet time coming down.”

“No Bouchard.” He breathed out. “I’m not.” The tension in his head was only multiplying ten fold. At this rate he wasn’t sure if shifting in his state was a luxury versus the conversation at hand. “You don’t get to say no. Don’t you understand that? Being raised as a pureblood you of all people should know that. The only ones that might not notice or care as much are those that see the world through rose colored glasses and those people are far and few between anymore.” Nik could feel the tension lessening, at least on Declan’s behalf. Or perhaps he was just feeling weaker than he’d anticipated before this conversation started. Either way it was curious and Nik’s brow raised. “I know enough. I know that my father only cares for my older three siblings because those are his prize winners. The ones that never disappointed him and my younger two sisters just haven’t had the chance to either foil their way into his good graces or out. I didn’t have the luxury of using magic at all while I was younger. Just me. My father despised me. I am even willing to bet that if you’d ask him now he’d not care more than that. My mother is the only thing that got me through that household. So yes I know exactly what you’re talking about.” Nik swallowed hard, he didn’t want to say what was about to come out of his mouth but Declan wasn’t the only one that needed reminded that things could be worse. “At least we’re still above the dirt unlike your friend and unlike mine. So no the sky isn’t falling. You’re still breathing. Suck it up buttercup and get a grip because no one else is going to do it for you.”

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miscreantmalfoy:

“I don’t….eight ball?”

“It’s a muggle expression. It just means starting off behind.”

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declanbouchard:

“Well, unless Marcus has another best friend you might accidentally happen to date, I don’t think he’s even going to attempt to be civil.” Declan rolled his eyes. “It’s semantics, who cares? And fine, I won’t make your life difficult. I’ll leave you alone. Unless you don’t leave Marcus and Aiden alone, in which case we’ll have a problem.” He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “Yes, I hear what I’m saying, you twat, and yes, quite frankly, I do. And if that makes me stupid, I don’t care. Fine, I’ll be stupid. And what the bloody hell do you mean? I realize I’m no angel, but you know, technically, that’s what all the students in this school are. Children. Fucked-up children. And you know, maybe things wouldn’t be this way if anyone outside of here understood that, but they don’t, so here we are.” He made a frustrated growl deep in this throat. “Don’t you think I fucking know what it’d do to them? Don’t you think that’s the reason I’m trying not to be stupid? And I don’t need your forgiveness, because you don’t know me. You don’t fucking know anything, Korolenko.” He balled up his fists and clenched his teeth as anger boiled inside him. He knew Nikolai was right, and that was what pissed him off. And the stupidest thing was that Nikolai seemed to see right through him.

“Then I guess we’re going to have a problem aren’t we?” Nik could feel his head start to pound at this point. Declan had always struck that nerve but he’d managed to keep it under control for the most part. But honestly seeing Declan in the state he was only made it harder for Nik to attempt to quit their banter back and forth. “It’s not just the school Declan it’s the whole world. What don’t you understand about that? Once you leave here it’s just on a grander scale. At least here there’s some sort of system to keep everyone functioning and to get them through and out until the next batch come up.” Nik let out an annoyed sigh and turned away from the other. His hands ran over his face and he started to chuckle. Which probably made him seem just as out of sorts as Declan at that point. “I know enough.” He said and turned to speak over his shoulder. “I know whether you want to admit it or not that people caring about you is a scary thing. You and I grew up in very similar houses. Mine didn’t force a girl on me but the tact was still there. You’ve got someone that genuinely cares about you. More than one person. So stop talking like the sky is falling because nothing is even that bad yet. Anything outside of here can be made to work if you work at it. Your engagement and whatever other hell you’re stuck in of your own accord or otherwise.” Nik turned and pursed his lips out, thinking to himself a moment. “I don’t know a lot about you but I know what I know and given that I’m the one telling you to get a grip because things are going to get worse and I won’t be the focus for your rage for every time. If you don’t catch it now everyone is going to be a lot worse off.”

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“Maybe not the truth, but whether or not you would have said it.  Alcohol makes just about everyone a talker, right?”  Peter definitely felt more sociable.  “It was a joke, can’t you tell by the wiggly eyebrows?”  He didn’t know why people wouldn’t trust Nik.  Maybe because he was a transfer and a Slytherin?  Maybe it had something to do with him leaving.  But Peter didn’t want to bring the mood down, so he pushed it to the back of his mind.  “I can be misled with other things as well, like shortbread.  It’s the only thing terminally Scottish about me.”

“I suppose that’s true. I’m not nearly so sociable so perhaps I’ve had a bit more than I’ve realized.” His shoulders shrugged but he chuckled at the eyebrows comment. “If you plan on being see around with me after this you’ll find out I sometimes miss when there are jokes. I’m afraid I’m a bit dense to that sort of thing. I’ll blame Durmstrang because though we did laugh there it’s not over the same things as here if that makes sense.” His face softened a bit and he nodded. “There’s nothing wrong with biscuits and truth be told those are my favorite too. They’re not too sweet at least not for me.”

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odette–belcourt:

“Well, maybe there will be parents’ weekend again. Mother and Father skipped last year, but they could be there this year.” She shrugged. “There were cliques first year. I’d be shocked if she didn’t know much about them. Of course, I could have been an odd child.” She sighed. “I know. It’s eight minutes, but he acts like he’s so much older. I love him dearly, of course. So are you an overprotective brother like Owen?”

“If there is one I’m sure they’ll all make an appearance. Everyone outside of here was talking about the quarantine when I was away.” He shrugged and pursed his lips out. “Then she’s just like our oldest sister at masking what she knows. I shouldn’t really be surprised though.” He chuckled softly. Or perhaps that was just a Korolenko thing but that was a thought for another time. “I think that’s something that comes with the territory of being older. Even if it’s only a few minutes. My older brothers are the same way with my older sister but I know she can handle herself and she damn near broke my arm when I was younger. I tried to back talk her so I don’t venture onto her bad side too often if I can help it.”

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odette–belcourt:

“I grew up with a staff of house elves catering to my every want and that didn’t really change at Hogwarts,” she admitted. “The French make cooking an art. We have an actual chef at Grandmere’s. He makes the most beautiful meals. I’ve tried to cook. It’s horrible. Do you know how to cook, Korolenko?”

Nik just shook his head trying not to laugh at the while ordeal. “It seems I’ve gotten the short end of the stick living in Russia then.” He teased and nodded. “Nothing extravagant but something to stick to your bones and fill you up. And I know you’re not a meat and potato sort of girl. Hell you’re not impressed with the beets so I’m not going to torture you with trying it.”

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declanbouchard:

“Well, at least he and I are on the same page about you,” Declan said with a scowl. “But fine. We’ll let him decide. Besides, I’m sure he’ll make the right choice. He never takes back someone who doesn’t deserve him.” He was surprised how much venom there was in his voice, but he couldn’t help it. “Yes, it does. It matters whether we’ve got a hunter in this school or a murderer. I’m sure it wouldn’t make a difference to you, but the rest of us care.” He scoffed. “Who says it can’t be both? Maybe I’m trying to get myself killed and trying to delude myself into thinking I can actually fix things. Who said I wasn’t full of surprises?” He laughed, and it almost sounded manic. He should have been alarmed by it, especially considering that he’d seen for himself what a complete maniac looked like, and he had no desire to become one. But he was feeling everything through a haze, where everything was blurry except for the carefully-spoken threats. He really was a fucking masochist, wasn’t he? He laughed dryly. “Well, we are children, aren’t we? Children in a fucking school.”

“He’s taken you back even if it’s as a somewhat friend so I think my chances are looking pretty good.” The last thing he wanted was another brawl especially when he was like that but that mouth was getting him more worked up by the moment. “I think you mean predator and in case you haven’t noticed the school is being ran by one. So where did I say I didn’t care. I don’t enjoy being here anymore than you do but I don’t go out of my way to make your life difficult. That was all on you yet again.” Nik shook his head and rolled his eyes. He couldn’t understand this morbid fascination with wanting death or seeking out a form of torture similar to it. “Are you listening to yourself? Do you even hear what is coming out of your mouth? Two students have already died this year. One being your friend and you actually still wish for death? Imagine your death. See how Devine would handle it. How’d you think Marcus would feel? Your little brother or even Odette? Be full of surprises not stupidity and don’t blame it on being a child because we, as well as just about everyone else at this institution know that’s hardly the case.” Nik closed his mouth and studied Declan a moment. “You’re an idiot but actively seeking out something like that is beyond any sort of forgivable measure. You’re not knocking on death’s door not even close so grow a pair and get your head out of your ass.”

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miscreantmalfoy:

Uch, another year of teaching is about to begin and I haven’t startedany lesson plans.

“Well there’s nothing like starting the year behind the eight ball is there professor?”

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profeseer-blanchett:

“It’s a nice break from the “fake seer freak” I was in school. I suppose I got so used to trying to stay out of the spotlight that it’s second nature now.”

“Fake seer?” Nikolai questioned curiously. “I doubt you can fake something like that. The people you went to school with were ... no they are idiots.” He told her and gave a short shake of his head. “That’s something that should be celebrated. It’s a good thing well in a way it is.”

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woods-canvas:

“You think I’m funny?  Wow, you must be drunk.”  Peter chuckled to himself and watched as Nik drained the glass.  “Can I trust the Russian epitome of Edward 40-Hands?”

“No I’m hardly drunk but that doesn’t change what I said even if I were.” He gave a small smile and set his glass aside. “Does it worry you that much that you wouldn’t trust me? I mean granted everyone else here doesn’t and would brandish the idea but I’d never mislead you with alcohol. It’s quite a serious matter.”