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[ninnieartsies]

I am very much a monogamist even in my fictional ships but I can't stop thinking about an AU crackfic where Yuji is FWB with Megumi, Junpei, Yuta, and maybe Noritoshi (I have a soft spot for Mama's Boys) and Yuji is Utterly Convinced that every single one of them is on the same page--that is, they all enjoy making out/having sex with him, but it's all strictly platonic and they're all free to date/sleep around however they want, and if any of them decide to end or opt out of the arrangement, everyone else is chill

but the TRUTH. The truth is that Megumi, Junpei, Yuta, and Noritoshi all are desperately in love with Yuji. It is borderline pathetic how much they love him. They are all yearning their asses off, but they're all too depressed and traumatized to just say that to his face. And they all know that the other three love him, too. So these four gloomy dipshits are pining like the mightiest forests for Yuji and concealing it really really badly, but he doesn't notice because, as stated above, he genuinely thinks they all agree that this is platonic.

and then Yuji meets this really hot older guy who is NOT a dark-haired emo with untreated depression--Gojo Satoru is in therapy and taking his meds and hitting the gym and he is No Longer Emo, Thank You Very Much (he is absolutely still emo, he just doesn't tell anyone), and he's got a steady career as a guidance counselor at a low-income school where he's making a difference in the lives of hundreds of kids every day, and Yuji just. faceplants into love with him. you mean to tell him that hot guys with big hearts AREN'T all sad and anxious and hiss like angry cats when you mention talking to professionals??? sometimes they're just irritating rich bastards who care about protecting future generations??? and sometimes they blush all cute when they're caught donating enormous amounts of money to school clubs anonymously, or using their family's political influence to make it easier for kids to attend university, or physically beating the shit out of adult men who try to flirt with teenage girls???

So Yuji goes to his four friends who he also regularly sleeps with and says, "Guys, I can't have sex with any of you right now, I'm thinking about only one man's dick and it's making me feral how much I want his tongue in my mouth" and instead of being consoled or teased he is met with four grown-ass men having silent breakdowns internally while they try to figure out if they should team up to get rid of Satoru or be grateful that none of the others get to ride Yuji's dick either.

because this idea is coming from my head there is of course a happy ending where everybody gets help for their issues and Yuji and Satoru raise an army of children together and are Very Very Happy And In Love

[ninnieartsies]

adult life is truly just thinking “I NEED TO CLEAN” while dealing with the 17 other things that have a hard deadline

[ninnieartsies]

so I got into grad school today with my shitty 2.8 gpa and the moral of the story is reblog those good luck posts for the love of god

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[ninnieartsies]

trio roadtrip !!!

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+ bonus <3

[ninnieartsies]

free to literally any home: whatever the fuck this fragment of a story is

~

The shrine was very pretty, clean and newly-painted, surrounded by elegant greenery, neat stone-gardens, and a mix of every kind of blue and white flower native to the area. There were two incredibly ancient jasmine bushes, one on either side of the entrance, heavy with blooms. Inside, at the back of the shrine, was an old, weathered statue carved of pale wood, of a man sitting in lotus position, eyes closed, his hands palm-up in his lap. Cradled in his hands was a bronze vajra.

The priest was explaining that the vajra had actually been the magical weapon of a mighty half-demon, half-human warrior, and that the statue was the last remnant of a demigod who had battled him into submission on this very hill, sealing the weakened demon in his own weapon. Itadori Yuji was not paying attention, like most of his classmates. This was the final stop on the trip, and most of the kids were just longing to sit down and eat dinner, before maybe going out to buy souvenirs if they hadn’t found anything that day. Yuji was no exception.

He scratched his head and let his eyes wander, over the paintings hung, six on each wall; they were faded and dull, but still clearly displayed scenes of battle. A man in a black kimono patterned with red, blue, and purple stars fought a demon in white hakama, the cuffs drenched with blood. Yuji couldn’t really tell if either of them were winning or losing, but he did like the look of the man in black.

The demon looked too much like him, unpleasantly enough. He’d heard of “historical doppelgangers”, but he wasn’t too keen on posting photos comparing his face to that of a mythical murderer online. It was mostly the hair, anyway—a sort of puce color that could have been pink, if nature were just a little bit crueler. Although the birthmarks on his cheekbones that had started as just unusually symmetrical freckles last year were in the same spots as the demon’s secondary pair of eyes, too.

Yuji returned his attention to the other man—the demigod.

Even in such an exaggerated style, he was oddly handsome. Yuji was too far back to see the statue clearly, but the painting closest to him hadn’t faded much around the demigod’s face. His eyes were an almost metallic sky blue (how had they managed that in the Heian era?), his hair a cloud of white, and he was smiling, wide and triumphant. Thus the blue and white flowers, then; this shrine was dedicated to him, after all.

The priest—an unusually chipper one, who wore a black beanie that clashed rather strangely with his very traditional kimono and hakama—urged all the students to try and pick up the vajra from the statue’s hands, assuring them that it was not secured to the wood in any way. The first to try was, of course, Sasaki-senpai, who had been enraptured with the priest’s tale; her adoration of all things spooky and occult extended quite naturally to bloody battles between demons and demigods. But try as she might, she was unable to lift the bronze.

This prompted the other students to become interested. The priest grinned and repeatedly swore there was no trick to it; but as each teenager attempted to wrest the vajra from the statue’s open, offering hands, this became quite obvious as a lie.

Yuji was still staring at the demigod’s portrait, thinking idly that he looked really fun. The kind of person who’d play silly pranks on people to try and get them to smile. Someone irritating, but friendly.

“Itadori!” Sasaki-senpai shrieked imperiously, “You have to try!”

“Hmm?” Yuji turned to where his classmates were crowded around the statue. “Why? If none of you can get it, I can’t, either.”

“You’re the strongest, you have to!” one of the boys said, and the others all clamored agreement.

Yuji made a face, but walked over, shoulders hunching as his classmates stared intently. “Can you all please not look at me like that?” he snapped. “I’m not that strong.”

“Yes you are! Come on, just try!”

With one last roll of his eyes, and a put-upon sigh, Yuji reluctantly reached out and—

—and plucked the vajra from the statue’s hands.

“Huh?” he said.

“Eh?!” Sasaki-senpai squawked.

“Oh,” the priest said, in tones of deep horror, “Oh, no.”

A soundless explosion of light and cool air smelling of jasmine and mint filled the shrine, knocking down the students and their teacher—except Yuji, who just felt a soft breeze against his skin. He blinked hard, clearing the spots that danced across his vision, and his gaze was captured by two incredibly blue eyes.

For a long moment, his breath caught in his chest. Those eyes… they couldn’t be real. They weren’t human. They were so brilliant, so multi-faceted; every flower, every summer sky, every gem and bit of dyed glass, every scrap of silk, glowing with their own brilliance.

They were sad, those eyes.

Then they blinked, and a warm baritone voice said, full of relief, “Oh, good. It worked.”

~\0/~

Gojo Satoru, jujutsu sorcerer, had sacrificed his own humanity to seal Ryomen Sukuna, because he had realized they were too equally matched, and he hadn’t wanted to die just yet.

The seal was… not fully his own. He’d called on his divine mother for aid, in a painfully childish display of being entirely out of his depth, and she had answered. Sukuna was sealed, and Satoru was transformed into the anchor that would keep him bound until… well, he wasn’t sure. His ears had stopped registering sound before his mother could finish her explanation. She had lingered just long enough to designate her half-mortal son’s final resting place as holy land, before kissing him on his newly-wooden forehead and returning to her palace.

He’d lost track of time, of course. He was just a soul in a hunk of wood. He could feel Sukuna raging against the seal tying him to his own weapon, and dedicated himself to keeping the seal powered; it would not weaken or fade as long as he lived, and since he was functionally immortal, that meant the seal was too.

Hands often tugged at Sukuna’s coffin, but they were all full of desire: for power, for pride, for approval, for someone to take them seriously. Satoru rejected them all, spitefully, even those who were strong enough to take his place. He would not let such hunger ruin the world again.

Until a hand entered his awareness that rejected him right back, simmering with nothing more than youthful annoyance and a deep, unending loneliness. A soul that knew the pain of being on a pedestal, and longed for someone to treat it like a person. A soul like Satoru.

And so… he let that hand take his burden.

His mother’s spell unraveled, leaving him flesh and blood once more. He inhaled, blinked, and was caught in the startled gaze of the sweetest, warmest brown eyes he had ever seen.

“Oh, good,” Satoru said, relieved. “It worked.”

[ninnieartsies]

hope is a skill

[ninnieartsies]

I feel like someone is standing next to me talking about how I'm dead

[ninnieartsies]

medieval backstreet boys: you are… my friar

[ninnieartsies]

Back in 2017 I signed up for one of the Cards Against Humanity sillies and did their Cards Against Humanity Saves America. Basically they were like fuck Tr*mp and his border wall and used the funds from the campaign to buy land and to make all 150,000 contributors part owners of said land across the US/Mexico border.

It was fun and silly and I got a little certificate.

Today I got an email that Elon Musk illegally annexed that land for SpaceX and that CAH are suing him over it. So possibly I’ll get like $100 if they manage to win a lawsuit and stick it to Musk. It’s like even more bang for my original buck.

[ninnieartsies]

[ninnieartsies]

"I love you , I'm glad we're friends"

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